Chapter 10: Epilogue
Disclaimer: I don't own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic or any of the characters, nor do I own Team Fortress 2 or any of it's characters. I do, however, own; Over-Dose, Quick-Fix, Captain Ajax, and Commander Ironsides.
Death, it's not what most expect. Most assume that death means slipping out of conscience, being transported to paradise, reincarnation, or even eternal damnation. But all these people are wrong.
To someone who has been in death's icy grip more times then he can remember, Pyro had lost his fear of the reaper many a year ago thanks to repetition and Dell Conagher's revolutionary Respawn Room which had never failed to bring him back from the brink, no matter how scattered his remains may have previously been.
As it turns out, when an entity dies, it releases a burst of ectoplasm (or a "soul" in non-scientific terms). The soul remains in the area where it's body expired and will stay on location for next three hours before…well, no one really knows. The reason why is because Dell "Engineer" Conagher created a machine (based off another one of his grandfather's inventions) that could instantly tag and then later capture said spirit and transport it back to the machine within a certain radius.
The ectoplasm, which contains a sort of blueprint for what it was in life, is bombarded with energy and transforms into a "snapshot" of the entity moments before death, clothes and all. This was the technology that allowed RED and BLU to fight tirelessly while sustaining fatal injuries only to be brought back in a matter of seconds.
It is in this twilight period that the ghost floats aimlessly before the Respawn Device gets ahold of it that the spirit is able to reflect on it's life, or how it's going to beat the living hell out of whosoever killed it last in the case of RED and/or BLU.
Pyro was defiantly in the void, that much was clear…but it wasn't the same void.
The void, normally a blaring white bloom that encompasses one's entire being a luke-warm sensation, was now a scattered and random patch of chaos in the fabric of reality. Shards of glass-like matter drifted about as if they were submerged in water that distorted whatever could be seen through them like a kaleidoscope, with sparks of random energy bouncing wildly about off invisible orbs in an otherwise crushing darkness.
It is here that Pyro finds himself, it is here that Pyro finds himself not as he once was. After taking in his mind-bending surroundings, Pyro stood on an unidentifiable surface, rubbing his throbbing head and looking in the direction he could only assume was "up". A pang of sudden realization washed over him: this may be it. He knew that throwing himself and the Horseless Headless Horseman into the void had no guaranty that he would respawn back in his own universe, or at all for that matter.
That was not his top priority at the moment, as his attempt at exploration ended abruptly when he tripped and began to drift slowly in the direction he had been heading. After colliding with another chunk of "floor" that completely disoriented him from what he thought was up or down, he checked to see what had made him trip.
What he found was even more strange than the plain of existence he had awoken in. Namely, that he had tripped over the dirty white shoelaces to his small sneakers. He had also scuffed up his knee that was not protected from the fall by his red shorts, nor was his elbow by his white and red stripped T-shirt.
"Uh-oh…"
==========================================================
"I love them," said Lyra, and although she truly did adore the dresses Rarity had made for her and the other two bridesmaids, the look Princess Mi Amore Cadenza (as she preferred to be called) was giving her told Lyra otherwise.
"Make them a different color," said the irritated Princess as she turned to leave. Lyra, Minuette, and Twinkleshine followed suit. Lyra wanted to thank Rarity for the dress, but her fear of keeping the already agitated alicorn waiting on her alone stopped her from saying a single word to the fashonista who was already busying herself with altering her creations.
As the three bridesmaids made their way down the spiraling staircase on the outside of the turret that Rarity and Twilight resided, Lyra waited for the Princess to dismiss them before addressing the other two mares.
"Hey, does the Princess seem…off to you two? I always heard that Princess Mi Amore Cadenza was a kind-hearted mare that spread love wherever she went, not an overly-demanding snob."
Twinkleshine gasped, "LYRA! How could say something so mean about the Princess? Sure, she may be on edge; but it's her WEDDING!"
"Yeah," interjected Minuette, "I mean, how calm and collected would you be if this were your wedding, hmm?"
Lyra opened her mouth to defend herself, but no words left her mouth. They were right; she didn't know what types of stress she must be going through in order to coordinate ALL of Canterlot for a single wedding!
Now that she thought about it, those dresses could use a bit of a color change. Her coat and mane really didn't match her gown, unlike Minuette's coat and her outfit. Lyra silently cursed her and looks, she looked almost exactly Colgate (other than her Cutie Mark) which meant her coat naturally complemented her dress, and Minuette's coat went well with darn near everything. That didn't bother her so much as the fact that they both FIT in their dresses perfectly.
'Lucky. I haven't had a chance to hit the gym ever since-' Lyra's train of thought, no matter where it was going originally, was now cruising back through her memories of the past few weeks. 'Actually, I really haven't been out all that much since the incident at the last Nightmare Night…shoot, I haven't been back here since then either.'
"Lyra? Yoo-woo, you there? C'mon, we're going be late if we don't get some dinner now before we meet back up with the Princess," said Twinkleshine as she tilted her head, her pink mane bobbed ever so slightly across her goldish-grey coat.
"Huh? Oh that's right! Let's go, I'm starving."
"Me too," added Minuette. As the trio headed off down the street, every reflective surface they past glowed with a purple hue of Shining Armor's protective shield spell that surged as it's caster added on another layer to the magic orb that cradled Canterlot within it's confines. It was impervious to all forms of bombardment, be it physical or magic-based, as long as Shining Armor continued to pour more and more power into it, his wedding to Princess Cadenza would go according to plan.
But, who's plan?
==========================================================
"Stay calm. Don't, panic."
"Yes, the trick is to not-"
"AAAAAAHHH! WHO SAID THAT!?"
"Me, now listen I-"
"AAAAAAHHH! WHO ARE YOU!?"
"Silas Mann! Would you plea-"
"OH MY GOD, IT'S THE HHH! AAA-*Ker-smack*" The small boy stopped his ear-shattering cries as an aged hand made forceful contact with his freckled cheek. The boy didn't cry, he had sustained much worse injuries in his adult life than to whimper at such a feeble hit.
He looked up at the thin man rubbing his hand; his white, receding hair traveled down the back of his neck into a stylish curl just above a ruffled neckerchief. He wore a long black coat that could be seen in any vintage amish swimwear catalogue with matching slacks and shoes. His eye were sunken and tired, like one who had watched the sun set too many times.
"Hmph, I liked you better when you were a mumbling pyromaniac," he said still massaging his hand.
"Give me a catchy tune to hum and my lighter and I'll fix that." The boy gave a creepy smile as his perception of what direction was "up" changed yet again as the slender man now stood at a forty five degree angle. "Where are we anyway? This isn't the void, is it?"
Pyro still couldn't get over how shrill and annoying his voice was, no wonder Mann had slapped him.
"It's a part of the void, I know of the section you're referring to and this," he chuckled slightly, "this is nothing like that."
"Oh really? Care to explain why I no longer have pubes while yours are growing out the back of your neck?"
Silas gave him a dirty look as he rubbed the back of his neck…for no reason in particular. "Cute. I assume you're referring as to why we have taken on these forms," he said in the same manner a teacher may speak to the slowest reader of the class.
"You assume correctly, tinderbox."
"'The void' as you call it is a place where a soul travels after it leaves it's dead body. This is where the more…unsavory of spirits end up; it's wild, chaotic, and oh-so drab." He glanced around as a bolt of energy crashed into another invisible orb, this time shattering it into the glass-like shards that could be seen drifting lazily about. "All I know is that this section of space is rather artistic, but it doesn't know how to read, so to speak."
"Huh?" stammered the childish Pyro as he rotated again so he was now completely upside down from Silas' perspective.
"You mean you didn't know?" Silas smirked with a sense of superiority, "Didn't little Conagher Jr. tell you how you manage to stave off death on a daily basis?"
"Of course he did. I just don't care to explain it to the likes of you," he said sticking out his tongue for added effect. It's not like he could really explain it very well anyway, honestly, he thought that the only other person who might have understood what that contraption did was Medic, maybe Spy.
But their jobs revolved around knowing things, Pyro's didn't. The only thing he really needed to know was how to maintain his weapons and how to track down Spies.
"Instead of reading our souls' blueprint, and making us an image of ourselves moments before death," he withdrew and old picture from his coat pocket of a family gathering right before his brother, Zepheniah, had died. "It makes our appearances based off what we want to look like, or from our happiest memory. Individually, of course. If it were collective then I'd be set ablaze while you would be missing nine pounds of ugly fat from atop your neck…"
Pyro couldn't argue with that, only Silas was missing the part where Pyro puts all of his nice, sharp axes into his pumpkin head after he removed it from the torso and mounted it on his mantle.
"So, we won't stay like this?"
Silas looked as if though he was going to say some wise-ass remark when his features dropped and took a more serious look. "Sadly no, if we ever return to our respective plain of existence," a shard of matter floated between him and Pyro, "WE WILL RETURN TO OUR PREVIOUS FORMS," said the Horseless Headless Horseman.
"Murr murph mruh," said Pyro through his gas mask. As the large shard pasted by and continued on it's way through oblivion, so too did the images of the rubber-clad arsonist and the terrifying Horseman, leaving Silas Mann and a prepubescent pyromaniac standing face to face.
"Damn those shards, certainly bring out the worst in us, don't they?"
==========================================================
Lyra trotted about in front of the large mirror in her suite, her altered bridesmaid's dress twirling about as she swayed from side to side.
'Not too shabby. Rarity really outdid herself with such a short time she had to work,' thought Lyra.
The wedding was only a day away, and everypony was giddy with excitement with thoughts of wedding bells and dancing (or in Spike's case, attempting to wrap his mind around what exactly a "bachelor party" was).
Everypony except Lyra; she just couldn't shake the feeling that she had forgotten something over the past couple of days since she had been in Canterlot, it had something to do with last Nightmare Night. But what the hay was it!?
"Oh! Of course, silly me. I need to get my mane done."
After a few hours in the salon and one hot mane style later, Lyra walked happily down the street on her way to meet up with Bonbon, who she hadn't seen much of since she was chosen to be on of the Royal Bridesmaids.
As she rounded a corner, she spotted a grey earth pony wandering about near the alley. Normally Lyra wouldn't think twice about it unless it was a cute stallion, but when a non-magical earth pony is suddenly engulfed by a throbbing green light, she took notice.
As the light faded, the earth mare was replaced by a tall, crimson pegasus that shot off into the wild blue yonder back towards the castle, leaving Lyra standing in the middle of the road with her jaw inches above her hooves.
"What in the name of Tartarus was THAT!?" Lyra thought about chasing after the shady shape-shifter when a gurgle from her hungry belly reminded her that she was indeed meeting Bonbon for a reason. 'I have been blowing her off lately, and I am hungry…it must be all the stress of the wedding finally getting to me. I'll bet that the shadows from the alley hid his true colors and his wings. The green light must have been-'
"What are you doing out here? Shouldn't you be getting ready?" Lyra jumped almost as hard as her poor heart. She spun around into a hasty and awkward bow as she came face to face with Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and her carriage, followed closely by a complement of Shining Armor's best soldiers.
"P-P-Princess! What d-do I owe the honor?" Lyra said nervously, she could already tell that the Princess wasn't in a good mood.
"I was just checking up on the cake that dim-witted farmer is whipping up when I see one of my hoof-picked bridesmaids standing in the middle of the road like a mule!" There was a slight hiss at the end of her sentence that made Lyra flinch.
"I-I-I-I'm sorry, P-P-Princess…I saw somepony in the alley get covered in a green flash, and suddenly turned into a red pegasus!" Lyra was having trouble keeping her head bowed while trying to explain what had transpired. Had she been locking eyes with the startled Princess, she might have caught the tint of green that flashed across her eyes.
"Oh no! Poor dear, you must be so stressed by the wedding that you're seeing things!" said Princess Cadenza in a complete one-eighty mood change. "Here, this should help…"
With that, the Princess' horn glowed a sickly green and tapped it against Lyra's. Lyra never made it to lunch with Bonbon, the last anypony saw of her was her hopping into the carriage next to Minuette and Twinkleshine, both of whom were sporting glowing emerald eyes, before the carriage door closed shut and carried on it's way toward the castle.
"Tomorrow is going to be perfect," said Princess Cadenza as she chuckled to herself.
==========================================================
They say that it's always quiet before the storm. If that were true, then hurricane "Screw It Let's Hit Florida Again" must have been preparing to knock the state off the face of the planet judging by how silent Pyro and Silas had become.
After their previous conversation, Silas had gone off to search for something, most likely his beloved Headtaker if Pyro's thinking was correct. He had wandered a ways before finally settling down and began to fidget with something Pyro couldn't see from his angle.
The occasional shard that past by would portray Silas as the pumpkin-headed giant, before drifting off and revealing the feeble old man he truly was…or was it the other way around. A smaller piece of glass floated up by Pyro. Holding it still with one of his grubby hands, he placed one of his scrawny arms on the other side, only to have it appear as a black glove leading up to a red sleeve.
He pulled back. This place would drive him mad if he stayed there for much longer. How long had he been trapped anyway? An hour? A day? He had lost track awhile ago and Silas wasn't offering any help, he just kept fiddling with something he had found over yonder, only opening his mouth to yawn or mutter a curse.
Pyro had always been curious, it was one of the many things that was so great about his job; finding out what burns and at what temperatures. Right now, his curiosity turned away from flames for a brief moment and focused on whatever it was that the old man/demonic lumberjack found so enticing over in his little corner of subspace.
Pyro jumped in the new direction of up and landed sideways a few yards above Silas. He crept along carefully, using every stealthy trick he had caught Spies using over the years until he was directly above him. He gazed down at what was so darn interesting…
"Oh sh-" Pyro slammed onto the same invisible surface Silas had been sitting on as a tremor shook him from his perch.
He quickly got to his feet, nearly tripping over one of his untied shoelaces. Pyro looked up at Silas, and up, and up.
"HEADSSS!"
"YES, IN DUE TIME, BUT I WANT TO MINCE THIS LITTLE ABOMINATION FIRST!" The Headtaker swooshed through the void, obliterating an orb and sending razor shards in all directions.
"How…how did you…?"
"HOW DID I BECOME THIS ABOMINATION AGAIN? EASY; WHEN YOU SHATTERED MY HEADTAKER, THE REMNANTS FOLLOWED ME HERE INTO THE VOID, WHERE IT WAS ORIGINALLY FORGED. HEH, WHERE DO YOU THINK I FOUND A WEAPON SUCH AS THIS!?"
Pyro shifted away from the beast as he let loose a thunderous laugh. THAT'S what he had been doing! He must've found the pieces of the Headtaker and was assembling them this whole time while Pyro was…was…well, picking his nose (something that hadn't been done in years), but he didn't know that he might have to contend with the HHH in the form of his unarmed, seven-year-old self!
"WHEN I FIRST DIED SHORTLY AFTER MY BROTHER, I WAS SENT HERE…A CRUSHING DARKNESS THAT WENT ON FOREVER, IT WAS MADDENING!" He clenched his fist in a ball of rage at the thought of his over-privileged brother getting to live out the rest of eternity someplace else.
"AS THE YEARS DRAGGED ON, I BEGAN TO NOTICE, MUCH AS YOU SEEM TO HAVE DISCOVERED, THAT THESE SHARDS SHOW THINGS AS THEY TRULY ARE," growled Silas as another shard passed in front of Pyro, this time the ghastly figure before him did not waver in appearance.
"ONE DAY, I LOOKED INTO ONE OF THESE SHARDS AND SAW MY ARM, BARE BONE AND WHITE AS FRESHLY FALLEN SNOW, HOLDING THIS GIGANTIC WEAPON. I REACHED OUT FOR IT, AND FOUND MYSELF TRANSFORMED INTO THIS CREATURE YOU SEE BEFORE YOU."
The Horseless Headless Horseman lumbered towards the brave child crouching down before him, crystalline cracks forming beneath his massive boots that rapidly spread throughout reality but didn't cause any further damage that could be observed.
"TIME TO DIE!" Pyro rolled out of the way as the Headtaker tore through the fabric of reality. The enraged lunatic continued to randomly destroy anything and everything in his path in pursuit of the age-defying Pyro until after multiple twists and turns (and changes in gravity) the HHH finally lost track of the little spitfire.
==========================================================
"You're not going anywhere!" said the three voices simultaneously as they echoed all throughout the Crystal Caverns. Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lyra, dressed head to hoof in full wedding regalia with glowing green eyes, stood between Princess Cadenza and Twilight Sparkle…on Princess Cadenza's orders.
If fact, the disheveled Princess of Love that stood shakily before them had never even met her own hoof-picked bridesmaids until now. She had been trapped by a perfect copy of herself in these very caves for the past week until Twilight had inadvertently saved her. The Princess that had been organizing the wedding all this time was in fact not a Princess at all, for she was already a Queen.
Queen Chrysalis, once thought lost to the dusty textbooks of the Royal Library, was the ruler of a rare species known as the Changelings; parasitic, hive-minded creatures that take the forms of other ponies and feed off the love of those closest to their new identity.
In this case, Queen Chrysalis had managed to body-snatch Princess Cadance when she attempted to secretly leave a bakery she had nearly cleaned out during a pre-nuptials stress binge (this fateful overindulgence supplied her with enough fa- energy, to survive as long as she did in the caves).
With Chrysalis in place, she fed off Shining Armor's unrelenting love and slowly brainwashed him into becoming her puppet. She later sent a threat to Celestia of an impending attack on Canterlot during the wedding, with all those ponies in one place and Shining Armor's shield spell blocking any sort of sensor spell that might have detected her troop's movements, conquering Equestria was going to be mere foal's play! If it weren't for Shining's meddling little sister, Twilight Sparkle.
While Queen Chrysalis had been able to masquerade as Princess Cadance well enough to fool the ponies she needed to, she had no idea what to do when Twilight revealed that Cadance was Twilight's foalsitter. It was Chrysalis' actions and behavior that betrayed her to the young unicorn scholar, acting quickly, she managed to turn things around on Twilight until she began to doubt herself into thinking the Queen of the Changelings was the true Princess of Love.
Having been trapped far below Canterlot in the Crystal Caves by Chrysalis, Twilight discovered the genuine Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, where the two began to escape. At the mouth of the exit back to the surface, the two captive mares were halted abruptly by a trio of brainwashed bridesmaids.
Which brings us back to where we left Princess Cadance and Twilight Sparkle…
As the elegant drones closed in on the two mares, Cadance was struck with an idea; no matter how brainwashed they were, they were still duty-bound bridesmaids. Which meant…
Candance (seemingly from nowhere) withdrew a beautiful bouquet and dangled it before the emerald eyes of her attackers. They froze, transfixed on the flowers levitating just out of reach as they followed it's every movement until it was cast down one of the many abandoned mine shafts, promoting Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lyra to dive after it while Twilight and Candance made their way to the surface to stop the wedding.
"It's mine!"
"I want it!"
"No, give it!"
Completely ignoring the jagged edges of the cavern, the mares fought and tumbled down the shaft for a few moments before they spilled out into a large opening.
"Gah! Twinkleshine! You ruined the flowers! Now none of us will EVER get married!" said an enraged Minuette, her eyes still glowing from Chrysalis' mind-control.
"It wasn't me," started Twinkleshine, dusting of her dress that had somehow managed to remain unscratched throughout her ordeal. "It was Lyra! She was the one who landed on it!"
"WHAT!? The only reason I landed on it was because you knocked me over with your big, clumsy hooves!"
The bickering continued for a short time, neither party wanting to assume responsibility for the damaged goods and attempting to blame-shift onto somepony else while adding in an insult or two for good measure.
"Wait, why are we still fighting over these smashed flowers? Queen Chrysalis still has to throw hers! We can still catch that one after she takes over Equestria!" Minuette said happily.
"You mean so I can still catch it in time," snorted Twinkleshine as she bolted out towards the exit, "first one there gets the best spot!"
"HAY! No fair!" shouted Minuette as she took flight after rival. Lyra too was about to give chase when a twinkling caught her glowing eyes. There, lying chipped and cracked a few feet away, was the Last Breath adorned with an Unusual Waxy Wayfinder.
"P-Pyro…?"
==========================================================
"I KNOW YOU'RE STILL HERE, I CAN SMELL YOUR FEAR," echoed the Horseman as he trudged about subspace in search of the itsy-bitsy Pyro, who had managed to stay hovering above Silas and out of sight.
'Damn this stress-gas, one more rip like that and I'm done for!' thought Pyro. Normally his nervous gas attacks would be masked by his suit and/or the smell of burning, but here in the void, there wasn't a can of air freshener in sight.
As Pyro continued his fatal game of hide-and-seek, a peculiar glass shard floated before him. Unlike all the others he had encountered, this one was reflective, and showed the seven-year-old firebug his adult self; clad head to toe in red, asbestos-lined rubber with black boots and gloves, topped off with a grenade belt that held his silver propane tank. The soulless goggles starring back at him gave him slight chills, he really WAS terrifying.
The classic loadout he had used for so many years…but in his hand rested the Postal Pummeler, a relatively newer weapon that Mann Co. had recovered for him from the remains of his childhood home (the new owners had resisted at first, but it's amazing what an eight foot tall Australian can achieve with a single pile-driver).
'Why the Pummeler? Why not something more effective like the Volcano Fragment or the Backburner?' Then it dawned on him; Silas had the picture of himself in his pocket that the void used to form him, that means the Pummeler had also made it here along with the picture inside!
He reached out for his reflection, and to his surprise, could actually feel the splintering wood on the Pummeler's handle. Energy lashed out from Pyro's physical contact, sending bolt after bolt in all directions. The Horseless Headless Horseman would have had to be deaf and blind to have missed it, and quickly turned towards the light show.
With a mighty hop, skip, and jump, the Horseman flew through the air and utterly demolished the mirror. But Pyro was nowhere in sight.
"WAS THAT IT? IS HE SLAIN?" He felt something brush against his shoulder, but it wasn't so much a brush as it was a tap. Foolishly, he turned to see what it was-
"Murr murph," was the last thing the HHH heard before a regulation U.S. postal container slammed into temple. The rubbery maniac wielding said impromptu melee weapon laughed from behind his gas mask. Pyro had indeed returned, and a familiar computerized voice acknowledged him as well.
SUBJECT: PYRO
TEAM DESIGNATION: RELIABLE EXCAVATION DEMOLITION
LOADOUT: B
CURRENT LOCATION: VOID, UNKNOWN SECTOR
RESPAWN TIME: IMMINENT
Pyro felt the invisible net of the Engineer's Respawn Room tug him back towards reality. Before he vanished completely, he looked the towering monster straight in the eye, and flipped him the biggest double bird anyone would ever receive in the history of bird-flipping.
With that rude gesture, he was gone, warped back to the land of the living, leaving Silas alone in the void.
"JUST YOU WAIT, PYRO. I'M NOT THE ONLY HALLOWEEN HORROR THAT WANTS YOU DEAD…"
***
The white bloom, the real void. Pyro had finally retu-*SLAP*
"Pyro! Pyro, dammit, wake up boy!" said a concerned voice with a heavy Texas accent. Pyro blinked a few times before realizing that the heavenly light he had been starring into was actually the flickering florescent lightbulb inside of RED Spawn. Pyro sat up, his entire team stood huddled around him as the Medic sat crouched at his side checking his pulse.
"Murdc? Murnhurnr? Huddha hurr?" muffled Pyro, his head pounding like a sandvich two obese Heavies had been fighting over.
"Ach, good. You're awake. I vas starting zink zat maybe we had lost you, mein friend," said the exhausted German as patted Pyro on the shoulder and sat down on the bench, he had obviously been trying for who knows how long to revive Pyro.
"Yeah kid," said Dell, who had also been kneeling down next to Pyro while the Medic had been working, "Ah saw you get sucked inta that vortex and assumed the worst, glad Ah was wrong. We lost track of ya fer a good half-hour before Spy found ya lying in here after the round ended."
"Murr…Huh? HURM-HUDUR!?" A half HOUR!? No, that was impossible! He had been in Equestria for at least three DAYS! Had…Had it all been a dream? Had he simply died in the vortex and just got lost in the void up till now? Was Lyra and all the other little ponies just a figment of his, admittedly strange, imagination?
With Pyro given a "meh" bill of health by the Medic, the rest of the team dispersed to their own devices, leaving a battered and confused Pyro alone with his thoughts. It probably would have been better if Pyro's thoughts didn't revolve around the strong possibility that the past three days and all the friends he had made were imaginary, or this irritating pinching around his left ring finger.
Pyro looked down at where the irritation was manifesting and saw a bulge coming from under his glove. Making sure no one else was in sight, he slowly removed his jet-black glove…
==========================================================
Lyra, her eyes returning to their natural yellow, gazed down at the cracked human skull and began to cry. She had forgotten something much more important than to get her mane done; she had nearly forgotten all about the only human friend she had ever made.
How could se have been so stupid!? How could she have…wait, wait. She wasn't the only pony who had forgotten. Bonbon hadn't brought up the subject in weeks, and none of the Mane 6 had mentioned anything to her either!
What Lyra didn't know was that since Pyro was never meant to exist in this universe, Celestia had cast a spell that slowly erased Pyro and the Horseless Headless Horseman from the memories of everypony (except the Mane 6) to ease the fact they all might have been decapitated or eaten that fateful night. But with the mere sight of Pyro's discarded headgear, everything Lyra had forgotten over the past month came flooding back to her.
"Oh…I'm…I'm so sorry, Pyro! I didn't mean…I didn't mean to…" She stopped, there was something hanging loosely off to the side under the Last Breath's teeth; a rolled up piece of paper with a small, purple box attached. Lyra picked up the box in her hooves and unrolled the paper with her magic. The note read:
Lyra;
I don't know how long I might have here in Equestria, so I'll try to make this brief. You are one of the only friends that I have ever had the pleasure of making, and I can't thank you enough.
As I write this, I have become a horrendous creature known as the Infernal Imp. I wish I could tell you not to be afraid, but I can feel my memory beginning to fade. I don't know if I'll survive this encounter with the HHH, or if I'll ever make it back to my own universe again, but I want you to have this to remember me by.
Love, Pyro.
Lyra wiped away a tear as she turned her attention to the box she held in her hoof. She carefully opened it and gasped at what she saw; a golden ring with a large diamond embedded in it.
The rock was flawless and shown brightly by the faint glow of her magic still encompassing the letter. Tied to the base of the ring was a name tag, that read;
Best Friends Forever
Lyra slid the beautiful ring from it's resting place and placed it around her horn. It felt warm, just like the hug Pyro had given her right before he…before he went home.
"I know that he's back where he belongs. Heh, he's too strong to let anything else happen!" As she tucked away the letter and the box the ring had come in, the OTHER events that had taken place of the past few weeks came crashing back. "The wedding! I have to stop Chrysalis!" gasped Lyra. With that, she tore off in the direction Twinkleshine and Minuette had gone.
The Last Breath, it's job completed, faded away to rejoin the other hats in the comfort of Pyro's backpack.
==========================================================
Pyro couldn't believe what he was seeing. There, on his singed and burnt hand sat the Something Special For Someone Special! Before he could ask from who it was from, an alert popped up overhead.
Lyra has accepted Pyro's "Best Friends Forever"!
Congratulations!
"…HURRRDAH!!! MUPHHMHMHMHM!" Pyro rocketed out of his seat into one the most impressive double backflips ever witnessed. She is real! Pyro wasn't crazy (not in that regard at least)! Pyro could hear whispers and cooing coming from the others as they made remarks as to who or what this mysterious "Lyra" could be. Pyro didn't care, he was happier than he had been in years, like a massive weight had been removed from his heart.
As Pyro pranced around, Tarvish was busy rummaging through his locker in search of something of critical importance, more than likely booze. "Agh, bloody hell! Where di' it go?"
"What's wrong, Drunky? Lose your other eye?" snorted the Soldier as he walked over to see just what the hell the drunken Scot was searching for.
"Shut it, 'JANE'. Ah, don't need this from ye right now, Ah caint find it anywhere!"
"Find what, you're sense of self-respect? Sobriety? A REAL weapon?" said the Soldier (A.K.A. Mr. Jane Doe) as he withdrew his trusty Rocket Launcher and polished off some residue of what was once a BLU Sniper.
"No, the Bombinomicon, it's missin'!"
==========================================================
"Evil Queen defeated: check. Peace restored in Equestria, again: check. Brother and best foalsitter ever happily married: check. Spike still not having a clue what a 'bachelor party really is: double check. Well, that does it for that list," said a tired Twilight as she stifled a yawn.
She and the rest of the Mane 6 sat around the sleeper car on the train back to Ponyville, worn out from all of the excitement and fun they had at the Royal Wedding. They had all decided to keep their fancy wedding gowns on (except Rainbow Dash) to show everypony back home who didn't get an invite to go personally and were talking about everything that had happened. Everypony else from Ponyville that had come on different trains slept soundly in the other cars, including Lyra, her new ring proudly displayed on her horn for all to see, even as she slept.
"So, Twilight, does this mean you're royalty now too?" asked Fluttershy.
"I don't know, maybe. It would be cool if I was wouldn't it?"
Pinkie nodded, "Yeah! Then I'd get to host ROYAL birthday parties for you each year!" A lightbulb appeared above Pinkie's head, startling Fluttershy and causing everypony else to give her a look of confusion before simply disregarding it and moving on. "That reminds me! I have something for you that I've been meaning to give you!" She reached behind her back and pulled out a brown book with a pink bow around it.
"Oh, thanks Pinkie. What is it?"
"I dunno, one of the fillies found it a while ago when we did that scavenger hunt back in Ponyville! I couldn't read it without it snapping at me so maybe it should be filed under 'M' for 'Meanie' instead of 'B'," said Pinkie as she watched at the apparently mean book carefully.
Twilight flipped the book over and nearly dropped it as she was met with two glowing red eyes glaring back at her. The book itself had a sort of leathery feel to it's brown cover, a red symbol of what appeared to be a spiky ball adorned what could be considered the "forehead". In the center of the grotesque tome sat a black bomb with an unlit fuse…surrounded by pointed teeth.
Twilight looked over at the pink mare that had given her the bizarre gift, she simply smiled at Twilight before joining Rarity and Applejack's conversation. Twilight flipped the book on it's side, it's title read "The Bombinomicon".
THE END…?
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Darrtaa · 60k words · 502 15 · 8.4k views
- Darrtaa · 32k words · 143 10 · 2.9k views
- The card holder · 25k words · 683 19 · 8.2k views
- tatony · 9.9k words · 707 27 · 12k views
- tatony · 16k words · 667 30 · 11k views
- AxleandWheel · 28k words · 413 13 · 13k views
- The card holder · 18k words · 1,185 30 · 14k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.135 seconds
Total duration
962 users online
61,913 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
And thus, Lyra's Pyro Predicament comes to a close. Sorry this took so long, and I realize that it's pretty long-winded for an epilogue, but what the hay. Till next time!
~Darrtaa
SEQUEL!?
Awesome Story.
Indeed, can't wait for the sequel/next chapter.
Sequal!
Loved the epilogue, and for that matter, this entire fic. One glaring thing that showed up in the last scene was that Twilight resorted Equestria, instead of restored.
Wow. Really nice. Now make another tf2 thing. Not enough. Good ones at least. Godspeed and goodluck!
(Don't worry! Your is one of THE best!)
Hey, don't think that you'll be getting off this easily! MOAR I SAY! MOARRRRR!
I mean, if that's okay with you. If it's not too much trouble...
-Jorofrarie
(P.S. Couldn't stop laughing when Pyro did that crit on Celestia...)
Noooo, I want more.
Now for Tarvish's bottle o' scrumpy to make it's way to Equestria. He'd rip the HHH in half if it meant getting to it. Hope he takes the Eyelander.
Celestia: Welcome to Equestria
Eyelander: HEADS!
Celestia: Damn.
TarvishL Sorry, lass. There can be only one!.......Eye.
Also memory spells are the cheapest fucking cop out of all time. it's like that damnable "it was only a dream" trope that you toyed with.
215740
You do know that the pyro is a girl right?
A sequel to this would be The. Best. Possible. Thing. EVER.
Looking forward to the implied sequel.
welllll... i don't see a 'complete', and there's that ending, so.....
crap. i won't have internet for three weeks on sunday.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'LL PROLLY MISS SEQUEL!
if there is a sequel, new bad guy will Merasmus hopefully
I say chap, I want MOAR!
Read me!
Darnit, i was thinking Pyro would return to face the changlings...
AN ENTIRE RACE OF SPIES! SPY CHECK! SPY CHECK!
Pyro's equestrian life is now complete. lol.
I feel like something in this whole fic has something to do with the Meet The Pyro ARG. INVESTIGATION~!!!
STILL SET TO INCOMPLETE
Bum Bum Bummmmmm!
SEQUEL SEQUEL SEQUEL
Do it you pansy!
Just kidding. Epic ending to an epic fic, and you should be proud. This was awesome.
794408 Technically, his/her/it's gender has never been defined. Valve has not made a "Meet the Pyro", the trailer most people have seen was fan-made, so do not know who or what the Pyro really is. He could be a robot, a demon, or even Satan himself. We may never know. We do know, however, that he is the most interesting class in the world. Because he sets things on fire. Now, if you excuse me, I must go into my closet for a few hours. I won't tell you why, so don't ask. *with perverted face* It's a SECRET.
HEEEAAADDSSSS.
SHUT UP EYELANDER!
Excellent job sir. This story will remain one of my personal favorites ever.
A truley awsome ending to a great fic, i just wish there was a bit more story on how Silas became corrupted and how Celestia and Luna dealt with the aftermatch of having one of their best friends turning evil.
And now I must track you for the next story.
Just finished reading from beginning to end.
Worth it.
"giant Grin" yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes. SEQUEL. can't wait mate.us
794930
Well i heard rumours that the video is coming out soon
794745 FIXED THAT
795247 Spoiler; it doesn't.
Or does it?
794408 The Pyro is Abe Lincoln...
Atleast the first one was.
Aaaaanyway, does this mean that Tavish DeGroot will be going to Equestria to fight Monoculus? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra2.png
795267 How'd you get the little Lyra? *Pokes screen*
795272 user iloveportalz0r made a FireFox and Chrome plugin that gives you extra emoticons.
http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/25924 here's the link to the blog post.
Have fun ol' chap!
PS: WILL THERE BE A SEQUEL?!?!11eleven!
Well then sir, i shall see you on the other side.
795282
I dunno, Tarvish, would you want a sequel?
Tarvish: Ack, no.
Even if you were in it?
Tarvish: Pffff...
What if I threw in BLU Soldier to go with you?
Tarvish: ...If I weren't the man Ah was, Ah'd kiss ya.
You're drunk
Tarvish: You're sexy...
795304 Not sure if awesome, or überawesome...
That would take friendship to a whole new level!!!
794198
The wait was totally worth it.
ALSO: Sequel?
images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2011/11/3/5ae7bc3e-41a6-4b16-958f-13330967d3a4.jpg
WAIT A SECOND!
"Oh really? Care to explain why I no longer have pubs while yours are growing out the back of your neck?"
I never met a man with houses growing on their neck!
795385 I know I know, it's spelled the same way though (not that spellcheck was any help, stupid thing).
794930
OBJECTION!!!
Valve HAS made a "Meet the Pyro," and it was announced to be released sometime in 2012. Unfortunately, it was also announced to be from the perspective of Pyro's eyes, so his/her/it's gender may never be known.
There have been a few hints saying the Pyro is a woman, though, such as one of the spy's domination lines and a possible pose for the Director's Vision.
EDIT: I just checked the blog and the official TF2 wiki. Looks like the video may be coming out any day now!
Check it out!
795392
I see. I never knew that!
795437 I'll bet that whoever named the second of those two things was trolling something fierce
Demoman or scout should go to equestria now, most likey through an experimental teleport built using scraps of righteous bisons.
795604 Thanks, the spellcheck I have is utter crap-in-a-box.
795877 The Australian crack was more geared towards Pyro, in that Pyro himself speaks in a mumbled and choppy way but he's too blind to see it. And again, thanks for the spellchecking.
I'll be honest, I shed a mannly tear when Lyra found the ring.
But, that was sheer concetrated awesomeness. I know I said the last chapter was great, but man. Man. You've hit exactly the right mix of action, comedy, fluff, and drama. I especially liked the explanation of the Respawn Room, the void, and the out of body experiences Pyro and Silas had. I got the feel that Silas himself was very similar to Professor Quadwrangle from Quantum Conundrum, and that fit perfectly. The thing is though, now you have to write a sequal starring Tavish and Twilight. You have to.
795934 Fine, mister bossy-hooves!
Actually, I've been trying to think of a good pony to co-star in the next volume, so I guess Twilight could work.
The reason way is because
1. Why.
The ring... BUCK YEAH!dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra.png
796057 Thanks again!