You know what that means, eh?
It's time for fucking god damn mother shitting crab walking SKELETONS

ahh yes you probably expected that one eh? well how about this underrated beauty

people should use that one more.

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Okay, I'd like to do this. There are currently ~4 pending stories that range from semi-written to almost ready to publish right now. I'd like to finish them all. I'll see what I can do. This is now known as Project Cleaners, the stories are not at all related except that they are all drafts.

Until then, here is my comeback song.

HOPE YOU LIKE FUTA.

... and it doesn't look that shitty yet, but I may be biased due to being drunk. Even my champagne has vodka in it, so don't expect me to be reliable source on how 2017 is like.

Hmm, I wonder which celebrity kicks the bucket first?

Also, who cares that celebrities have died in 2016? Many of them were probably born in it, we just don't know about it yet...

-- I died
-- Magello is unconscious
-- The mission isn't even half finished

EVERYTHING IS FINE

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Because I have over 800 followers and no idea if I have a consistent demographic beyond my readers being mostly American. Enjoy some straw polls.

• Age
• Gender
• Lol gay
• Story market-ability, I think that's what this is?
• Comment stuff

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IN WHICH SOME THINGS ARE DONE
As I write this, my newest terrible story is set to go live. In the meantime…

With that out of the way, onto news! If you'll follow me…

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On the 3rd day of Christmas...my True love gave to me...3...more dead Nutshack memes?....ok then...

That's all, in one hour I'll see Steven Universe's 'In Too Deep' and die. (also, unrelated, but then I'll thrown a party on my sister's house for my mom who's coming around, yaya)

So, me and the other holdovers got back from a detail, (we had to dress up casualty manikins in uniforms and body armor).

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Summer is upon us, and you know what that means. Free from the shackles of the educational institution, bored and attention-starved teenagers crawl onto the net in droves to socialize 24/7 and (often) get stirred up in all kinds of shit. Fimfic, sadly, doesn't have the good fortune to be exempt from it. I don't think we can complain too much, though. It does make for a lot of good material. Which is, of course, always nice.

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15 More days before the egg nog is gone...

I have been so quiet lately because I have been hard at work (also, I have some important happenings irrelevant to this blog) on some updates. One of those is a brand spankin' new story for Mother's Day. It has been in the works for a few years now. That's right, ya boi wrote a normal Mother's Day story. Probably.

Catch the SFW flavor here:

TThe Depth of Motherly Love

• MLP: FiM
• Dark
• Adventure

[TEEN VERSION] The most enigmatic of monsters will not carry the ugly faces of one. A young draconequus named Discord has yet to learn this, and mortals may never do so. Oh, and the first lamia is created amidst all this turmoil.

• Sex
• Gore
• Violence
• Death
• Profanity
• OC
• Discord

Ice Star · 12k words  ·  17  2 · 173 views

Or the NSFW flavor here:

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Well guys, after a few days and reading the comments I realized that AWNR hasn't gone like I had hoped. That ending was way too dark than I previously intended and I never anticipated it to build up to this point. Currently I'm literally frustrated to the point of tears and I just want to give up on this story and count it as a massive failure, because from how it started to what it is now is a complete 180 of what I truly wanted. However there is a plan in motion in an attempt to rectify this,

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Heeeey! I'm back! Have I lost some-

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