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  • 118 weeks
    vibe check

    who the hell is still alive on this shithole

    throw me a comment here if you live. Also I've got some stuff to say below the break I guess lol

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vibe check · 5:01am Jun 29th, 2020

who the hell is still alive on this shithole

throw me a comment here if you live. Also I've got some stuff to say below the break I guess lol

I've still yet to do that "binge the whole show" thing I said I was thinking of doing back in October when the show ended. Honestly, I was feeling like it was time to kinda move on.

But I still have some ideas.

why yes I do look exactly as garbage as this fella does in the current events-filled world

I have an alt now, for non-NSFW work. I know I sometimes post non-NSFW stuff here, too, but I figured a fresh start would be nice. I won't tell you two guys who still exist on FIMfiction what my alt is, because I'm kinda hoping that when I get around to actually posting content on that profile, people will try and piece together who that person really is. It'd be fun to see how far I can push that, should I get around to it.

I don't know if I'll continue Forma. I could reboot the idea but honestly I'm surprised it passed muster to get on this site considering how very tangentially related to pony it is. I might make a "reimagined" version of the fic that's a bit less ambitious and smaller scale, but no promises. I could also get back into the game.

Obviously I should probably address current events some way. I have type 1 diabetes. The CDC director was a dumb cunt and declared that one of the largest risk factors. He's not dumb because he's wrong, he's dumb because he told an already-panicking public they have more reason to panick if they have diabetes, even though most people have the not-rare version you get when you're fat, old, or pregnant (sidenote: there is no shame in being a fat old pregnant person). I'm not totally sure if I'll make it to the end of the year considering all this bullshit, but I'm pretty confident I'll pull through. My state's more stable than most, we've got excellent hospitals, and I have state health insurance thanks to my family, so even if I do get

the bug

I'll probably be okay.

But we'll see. Don't like that everything is opening up when the first wave isn't even over yet and the "second wave" is literally the first wave just continuing to skyrocket as my faith in humanity finally shatters and I shuffle in place amoungst the cynical masses who say "fuck people, people are dumb" and other such platitudes that disregard the context of other people's lives outside of how it inconviniences them

if you leave a comment here, thank you. I know this sounds pathetic but I've literally always been validated by that attention more than any other form of it you can get from this shithole. Knowing I motivated somebody, somehow, to say something about something I wrote is more important to me than votes, the feature box, or any other, less substantial form of validation.

Though speaking of comments, I've said a lot of dumb shit in my time here. It's part of what motivated that previously-mentioned alt. I have a lot of baggage here. Some of it is good. An uncomfortable chunk of it is bad. I've said some bad, shitty things in my time here in the past seven years or so (jesus, that long?). I could apologize but that wouldn't do much for the people those things hurt. I know that time has passed to the point that burying the hatchet would be a useless gesture, but if I said some shitty shit either you're aware of or that I said directly to you, please let me know. Tying into my comments comment above, I can't get better if people don't communicate to me how exactly I fucked up, and while inviting this kind of dogpiling is probably a really stupid move...

Fuck it. I can't go out there and get CURRENT EVENTS VIRUS and die without at least trying to understand some form of where I went wrong.

Miss you guys. Hope we can have something again. I'll actually do that binge soon, and will post episode-by-episode analysis as I look back through this stupid thing I got into back in high school and that never let me go. The friends I've made and the experiences I've had as a result of this fandom's existence are things that helped define who I am as a person, for good and for ill, and if I don't make it to the end of this shitty time we're in right now, at least I can pass on in a way where the good can finally outweigh all the ill.

Comments ( 43 )

I'm still here

I'm still around too

Well good luck! And yes, I'm still alive and kicking after being here for so many years. There are too many good stories that I keep coming back too!

Umm, boo, I guess...

its good to have you back . you dont know me but i remember you been reading your stuff for a long time .considering ive been a brony longer than your account has existed its a long time indeed :heart:

Still here! sorta.

Obligatory All Might quote.

Still alive and I'll never go away.

I'm not sure what these people are mad about but I'm not going away as long as this site exists.

Thank you for your written words.

I am. Somehow.

im not

Hiya! I'm here, been here for a while but it took the show ending proper to get me to start writing again. Weird how that works, but glad to see you're back!

I'm alive 💀



















Wow. This is a lot larger of a response than I expected. A lot more of you are alive than I thought. Which is good! Very good. I hope all you guys are doing OK. Current events being what they are, that's what I've been hoping for everybody at this point.

There anything about 2020 FIMfic I should know if I get back into the game?

I'm still alive🎵

Still alive and doing well as can be, wish you luck in achieving your goals.

Last I checked I was still alive.


It's exactly the same, just smaller.


It'd be disconcerting to find yourself dead after checking.


That's both good and bad to hear. This place not evolving is a double-edged sword.




Happy to hear from more people. Maybe this site is nowhere near as dead as I assumed. Which is good and bad, like many things. :yay:

I's still here reading words. I don't really pay attention to things that happen on here besides stories, and I don't know if that's bad or not.

Still here! Glad to see you wake up from a slumber. Come, join the rest of us who've slept and woken back up.

Ayyyy still kickin', also stay strong matey

"dead" as in not as big as it was at the height of the fandom? yeah that it is.

Dead as in no one is here and nothing gets posted? nah stuff still happens, good stories still happen, good authors still exist. You just have to know where to look i guess.

I'm still here. And not going anywhere.

Sorry about the diabetes. My father's diabetic and in a high risk healthcare job. So that's great. But I hope you make it through this.

Still here! Hopefully the rest of this year won't be quite as shitty for us all.

I still check the feed every couple of days:heart:

Still here, still alive. Sucks about the diabetes, I've got Type II. Also got Covid and survived, so that's that.

Be well, friend.

I come and go. Check the site probably once a month to see if any of the long running fics are updated, check blogs, etc

It’s 2021 so you better still be kicking.

actually was thinking I might be able to get the sequel to Sacred Sonatina going again, of all things.

or a untethered moment for Pinkie as she looks across the last few years of the Faster-Stronger-[REDACTED]-[REDACTED] quadrilogy that I never got around to continuing from Ein, or a lazy loose slice of life about Rarity, or the epic biographical dual narratives experiment with Rarity's past, or... :twilightoops:

I'm still alive. :twilightsmile:

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