• Member Since 11th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 5th, 2013

YoshiBrony


E

Note: So this is my first story and I am open to all feedback and ideas. (human-turned-pony fic)

Extended description: When a war ravages his planet, a simple soldier makes the ultimate sacrifice. But when he wakes up he is somewhere unexpected. Can he find peace in this new land, or will his past haunt him forever?

Chapters (20)
Comments ( 141 )

This seems interesting. I'm adding this to my read later list :twilightsmile:.

1724348 I'll try my best not to disappoint! :pinkiehappy:

great prmis,,, i do like where this is going, but the way it is done seems almost like a movie script,, if youd like to you can read my stories and see if it would fit the way your story seems to be going, mine even have a real twist to them im sure nopony will see comeing unless one reads them right. other than that i will give you a thumbs up i like the basis of the story, btw there are 3 installments of mine sofar, in the ponies in arms seres, war in equestria, nuclear winter, and marecenaries

Ooh, Is that another HIE fic I see? I may just have to read it and wait for chapter 3.

(i see what i did there with the zecora type rhyming)

I'll be back with some thoughts after i read them.

1724533 CHAPTER 2 SPOILER--------------Actually it's human-turned pony fic :derpytongue2: As you see when Isaac wakes up in Celestia's castle. :pinkiehappy:

(5 simple words were heard in his head. Words that touched his heart, and cleared his conscience for the last time.
"You aren't alone anymore....."), 5 simple words, but there are 4?

Apart from general grammar issues that usually follow a first story, i think you did well!

You could have perhaps gone into more detail and used more words, but im sure you'll get what i mean eventually.

So far, im thinking about 3/5. but its a new story, and it has room and time to improve.

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1724752 Oh crap, I forgot to put "are not" , i'll catch up on errors tonight before i write the new chapter. :derpytongue2:

1724752 Thanks for the feedback, i'm going to try and write longer chapters without the story dragging on much. Hopefully the next chapter will be out within the next few days :pinkiehappy:

1726803

Sounds good. Most of those things i pointed out are fairly common among new writers, im sure you'll get the hang of it as you write.

:)

I do say good sir this is quite spiffing :moustache:

Mi piacerebbe vedere più il mio buon signore!

Basically MOAR :pinkiecrazy:

Hey guys, just letting you know. I will write longer chapters if I can, but I will focus more on amount of chapters as to make up for the shortness of them :moustache:

I can see an instant improvement after the first 2 chapters, that is good.

You hooked me on the third one, i was doubtful when i started reading, but you wrote it very well, even with the occasional error or missing word.

Rating is now 5/5

Cant wait for more!

>> Thanks! Hopefully i'll keep up to standard in the future, and i'm working on the occasional errors as much as I can without forgetting ideas for future chapters. :pinkiehappy:

1738146 Haha same here, also i MAY or MAY NOT have taken the name from the guy on your profile picture.... :twilightblush: Names are hard to come up with and Isaac is an awesome one :scootangel:

MOAR!... perhaps its done today.... ill see this tomorrow! (or at least make it today)

I find myself liking this more and more as I read it.

You are getting much better at this, I look forward to the next chapter! :twilightsmile:

1744022 Thanks again :pinkiehappy: , i'll try and get the next one out tomorrow night, but its just filling in the blanks to reach my 2000 word average, it's getting a little difficult. But i do have something in store for the next chapter. And I think it might surprise you! :twilightsmile:

Hurray! Moar plz!

1724339 You. Explain.
I see you EVERYWHERE! WHY?

Alright guys, the next chapter is out! Enjoy!:pinkiehappy:

This is one of the better fics i have read, among my most favourite too, i can tell because i get really happy whenever i see an update for this. :twilightsmile:

The new chapter is awesome and I think the name works very well for Isaac.

Also, Applejack bucking him into a wall was hilarious! :rainbowlaugh:

As always, i look forward to moar! :yay:

Damn it! Another cliffhanger! Why???

I listened to the song and read it at the same time... and it was awesome. :twilightsmile:

Another awesome chapter! :rainbowkiss:

Also, sad story was well done. :pinkiesad2:

1756430 Thanks, I've had that song in my head for a while, so it felt good to put it in the story :yay: , also, i'm trying to put some more mystery into the story (but I am more or less making it up as I go along.) :moustache:

If that is your idea of making it up as you go along, I like it!:pinkiehappy:

Not going to lie, You made me cry with this one :fluttercry:

Bravo good sir bravo, another eccellente capitolo (excellent chapter) !!

Ok after hearing the song and reading the rest of the story... Wow, just wow... talk about powerful. Keep going with this, I can't wait for the nest chapter.

I made an account just to keep track of this story... Truly, I think this is better than most books I pick up at libraries. Also, that song fit the "I lost everything" Personality of Issac. <3 Can't wait for the next chapter

1760576 Thanks! I am very surprised at the great feedback to this story :pinkiehappy:, but its awesome! Remember to watch me for blog entries if chapters take longer than usual. :rainbowkiss:

"Ahhh........Crap." Indeed.
I suspect that the next couple of chapters are gonna be very interesting indeed.

1768690 We'll see, i'm kind of making this up as I go, changing bits here and there. But i have a bunch of ideas that will spread out over a few chapters :pinkiehappy: (I hope)

I don't get the end
... I got an idea though.

1769960 Er, no. More like Isaac just realised that both Fluttershy and Applejack have a crush on him.

1769155>>1769960 Actually, it turns out both Fluttershy and AJ have a crush on Isaac (due to Fluttershy thinking his nickname is "cute" and waking up next to him, and the slightly awkward few moments when AJ was holding him) :moustache:

Remember guys, if you have some ideas for the story, i'd be happy to see them over a private message :pinkiehappy:

Another great chapter, it took me longer to get to read it this time because of things, but keep up the great work!
:pinkiehappy:

Loving it :D And I can't see what's wrong with the chapter.... :p

I agree with the other guy, nothing wrong with this chapter, its still the same awesomeness I have been reading so far. :rainbowkiss:

When Irrie performs, is it going to be like the other time, with a link to a video so I can sing along again? Because last time was awesome! :rainbowdetermined2:

As always, Im looking forward to more!:twilightsmile:

Ya know, if you close a tab just CTRL+SHIFT+T I think and it will come right up :ajsmug:

1777059 If it does that in Chrome, I really could have known that yesterday.... :ajbemused:

Lol this updated when I refreshed!

You continue to surprise me with these regular updates, because no other story i read updates so often. :derpytongue2:

Another awesome chapter, looking forward to the performance. :yay:

1781069 my good sir, you do realize that the only thing you accomplish by doing this is aggravating lots of readers who want to read a story and post a comment without having to deal with merchandising crap like this. Best regards, please screw yourself :D

1779742 Heh, I'm using chrome. So take a guess? :trollestia:

1787148
Good? GOOD?!
How could you possibly say that?! That was a GREAT chapter!

However, now my sad-feel-sense is tingling, and I am expecting something bad in the next chapter or two.

Keep up the good work!:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

1787175

Okay then. BRILLIANT chapter. Happy?

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