A Strange Conundrum

by flutterdashforever

Bonus chapter

Authors notes: Ok so this was something that I wrote after I was reading through A Strange Conundrum again and it occurred to me to wonder what would happen after the kiss. This is what I came up with. WARNING: this is extremely satirical. I cannot be held responsible for what I wrote at ten o'clock at night. If you do choose to read on you are in extreme danger of flying fragments of fourth wall. This chapter is not necessary for the story line and I wouldn't blame you in the slightest if you chose to quit while it still makes sense. It also contains references to the first season three episode but I doubt there's many of you who haven't seen it yet.

Still reading? Well you have been warned, the nonsense starts here.

“I think we should totally make out right in front of her. I think the shock might just cause her to stop with the rhyming.”

Fluttershy felt a surge of emotions at the words. She could feel her cheeks warming and her heart had started beating at a mile a minute. Nodding her confirmation, she could feel a great deal of anticipation and… eagerness?

Before she could get her feelings sorted out, she felt a soft pair of lips on her own. The pressure increased as well as the depth. She leaned in, feeling her whole body heating up. Her cheeks flushed and her heart rate tripled. She could feel heat emanating from Rainbows face, pressed against her own. She felt a surge of desire and flipped them around, pinning Rainbow against the wall. Rainbow tensed at the sudden movement but then she relaxed and kissed all the more vigorously. After what felt like an eternity, Fluttershy withdrew. She looked at Rainbow’s face, she was smiling, a little dazedly.

“Well fuck.”

That had been almost a week ago now. After Rainbow had suggested they continue things had gotten even better. Suffice it to say that they were both a little breathless by the end. At length, Rainbow had left Fluttershy on her balcony to ponder what had just happened.

“And then what, Dashie? You two friends with benefits now?”

Rainbow blushed. “No, Pinkie! We just kissed.”

Pinkie snorted. “If it lasts for more than five seconds and involves anypony being pinned to anything then it is, at worst, a make out. From what it sounds like to me, it was more of an ‘everything but’ experience.”

“Pinkie! You promised to be delicate!”

“Wasn’t I being? Oh, I’m sorry dear, I don’t know why you put up with me. How’s this: sounds like you two shared a companionable kiss to help a friend. Better?”

“Yes. No. I don’t know. I don’t know if I wanted it to just be a companionable thing.”

“Why are you asking me about this?”

“Comedic relief to the author’s stressful life.”

“Oi! Nopony breaks the fourth wall but me!”

“Sorry, sorry. Alright, I came to you because I don’t know what to do.”

“Do about what? Your desire for you and Fluttershy to—”

“Pinkie!”

“Sorry. But you do have feelings for her don’t you? Come on, everypony knows it. After all: you know any one of us would have jousted with you at the crystal fair, but you had to go and pick Fluttershy. Come on Dashie, It’s not subtle.”

Rainbow snorted. “You know what wasn’t subtle: when AJ said that thing to Rarity when she got all de crystalafied. Watch out for those two. I sense a great deal of shipping to be spurred by that event.”

“Ehem.” Pinkie coughed warningly, reminding Rainbow of how close she was coming to damaging the fourth wall again. “Well if you ask me, the only thing to do is go and kiss some more. Surely that’ll tell you how you feel.”

“I don’t think it’s that simple.”

“Well you have to at least talk to her.”

“You’re right.”

---

“Well that doesn’t sound like it was just a kiss.”

“Um, I promise, we didn’t do anything else…”

“No, I mean it sounds more intense than that.”

Fluttershy was sitting in a soft chair in Twilight Sparkle’s library. In front of her, Twilight was looking at her intently.
After some thought, she levitated a book with a velvet maroon cover towards her. She flipped it open and Fluttershy got a glimpse of the cover. “Every Kind Of Kissing.”

She nearly choked. “You have a book on kissing?”

“I have a book on everything. This is actually one of the ones I took to the Crystal Empire just in case I needed it for my test.”

“And how would Princess Celestia test your kissing proficiency?”

“Uh, now that you put it like that I’m glad all I had to do was take down some ancient unicorn of pure evil. Mind you…” she trailed off looking dreamy.

“Twilight! Focus!”

“Right, sorry.” She blushed. “Anyway, kissing: what kind of kissing? Lips? Cheeks? French? Chased?” Twilight said, flipping through the book.

“What is wrong with you?”

Twilight looked up, feigning righteous indignation. “I’m a romantic!”

Fluttershy sighed. “It was very intense but nice at the same time, so gentle and warm…” She trailed off, blushing.

“I see…” muttered Twilight, flipping through her book again. “and was there any tongue?”

“Um… maybe… just a little…” Fluttershy attempted to hide behind her mane.

“Well according to this, you two are just perfect for each other and you should definitely pursue a relationship.”

“What?”

“Well you’ve always had feelings for her right?”

“Um…”

“Oh come on, everypony knows. Ever since the Cutie Mark Chronicles.”

There was the clearing of a throat. Pinkies head appeared out of the table top and glared at Twilight. “Watch the fourth wall there, bub!”

“Sorry, Pinkie. My point is, well, come on, she stood up for you, raced the bullies to stop them from picking on you. Ok, so friends do nice things for each other, but you know that’s not what it was about. And seriously, after Hurricane Fluttershy anypony who denied it would be a fool.”

Pinkie cleared her throat again. "Look, could you just lay off referring to the events by name of episode? Call it hurricane day, would you?"

"Sorry again, Pinkie. But the point still stands, you like her and you can't deny it."

“Yea, I suppose. So what do you recommend?”

“Go and talk to her at least.”

“Ok, Twilight, I think you might be right.”

"Oh, and Fluttershy?"

"Yea?"

"I keep tabs of which ponies borrow out which books, that means I know every book you've borrowed out so let me tell you right now that you are on shaky ground telling me off for having a book on kissing"

Fluttershy flushed dark crimson. "Tell nopony." With that, she left.

---

Fluttershy gulped. She was standing in front of a very intimidating door. The door itself was actually not so bad but behind that door was Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy wasn’t entirely sure what she wanted from the cyan pegasus. She was very carefully ignoring the thought that was telling her with blush worthy accuracy just what precisely she wanted from Rainbow.

Unbeknownst to Fluttershy, Rainbow was just on the other side of the door looking through the peephole, feeling just as nervous. At last, Fluttershy summoned the courage to knock hard on the door. Well, she thought it was hard. Quite frankly, it was lucky Rainbow was directly adjacent to said door, otherwise she might have missed the tiny tapping.

The door opened slowly. “Um, hey, Fluttershy. What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to- to- to talk about the kiss.”

“Oh, that. Um, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that as well.”

Fluttershy perked up. “You have?”

“Uh, yea. So, listen, I’ve had sort of a bit of maybe a kind of, um, tiny little crush on you."

Fluttershy felt her heart leap. “You have?”

“Yea.”

Squealing with delight, the yellow pegasus leaped forward and grabbed Rainbow in a crushing embrace. “I’ve had a crush on you for the longest time, Dashie.”

There was more kissing…

Comments

[lillytheomegawolf]

Well this last chapter would in itself add a 'random' tag to this story in quite a massive way... It was a fun read if nothing else and for being late at night... very good.
Flutterdash seal of approval
cdn.derpiboo.ru/thumbs/1400/1000/2012/08/11/19_15_20_257_72149__UNOPT__safe_rainbow_dash_fluttershy_shipping_flutterdash_artist_bread_crumbz
There was more kissing… LOTs more

[flutterdashforever]

1608237 I'm glad you liked it. I was half expecting to come back to twenty comments all saying "Um, WTF man!?" but it's nice to know not everyone thinks I'm insane...

...That is such a cute picture...

The brony said, "Let there be kissing." and there was kissing. Lots and lots of kissing.

[lillytheomegawolf]

1608857 I write crazier stuff that this.... so it's all good.

[The Princess Rarity]

1608237 I'm stealing that pic! Ish so cute
1608857 Should've been clop. (Then again, I'm a perverted mofo. )

[PrinceOfNigeria]

Interesting... most interesting.
I approve.

[Cicatrix]

Pinkie Pie's insistent rules about the fourth wall kinda remind me of this video:

Yeah, so... good, good. This continuation gets my approval.
Take it away, seal!
cdn.niketalk.com/1/14/350x700px-LL-1443acf4_seal-of-approval.jpeg
Anyway, I do have some corrections:

She leaned in feeling her whole body heading up.

Not sure if she starting flying, metaphor for euphoria, or just a typo of "heating". Also, I suggest a comma after "leaned".

Suffice it to say that they were both a little breathless by the end but at length, Rainbow had left Fluttershy on her balcony to ponder what had just happened.

I suggest splitting this up into two sentences. And maybe get rid of some extra words in the first part? Suffice to say, they were both a little breathless by the end. But at length, Rainbow had left Fluttershy on her balcony to ponder what had just happened.

“If it lasts for more than five seconds and involves anypony being pinned to anything then it is, at worst a, make out.

I think the comma after "a" is misplaced. It should probably be after "worst".

After all: you know any one of us would have jousted with you at the crystal fair but you had to go and pick Fluttershy.

After "crystal fair" I suggest adding either a comma or a period.

“No I mean it sounds more intense than that.”

Maybe a comma after "no"?

Ok, so friends do nice things but you know that’s not what it was about.

Perhaps a comma after "things"?

"Look could you just lay off referring to the events by name of episode?

Could use a comma after "look".

“Yea I suppose.

A comma after "yea".

"I keep tabs of which ponies borrow out which books and you can hardly tell me off for having a book on kissing"

A comma after "books" would help. I also think it might sound better if you change that "and" to a "so".

At last, Fluttershy summoned the courage no knock hard on the door.

Pretty sure "no" should be "to".

Well, she thought it was hard, quite frankly it was lucky rainbow was directly adjacent to said door, otherwise she might have missed the tiny tapping.

Rainbow demands her name be capitalized! Or Fluttershy demands for her...
Also, maybe splitting into sentences and adding another comma would help? So: Well, she thought it was hard. Quite frankly, it was lucky Rainbow() was directly adjacent to said door, otherwise she might have missed the tiny tapping.

“I’ve had a crush on you for the longest time, Dahsie.”

Should be spelt Dashie.

And, since Twilight is mentioning episode names, it might help to have them capitalized. Or not. Whatever.

Ever since the cutie mark chronicles.
And seriously, after hurricane Fluttershy, anypony who denied it would be a fool.”

Last one! Now, I wouldn't normally edit authours' notes, because it's kinda FROM them, but here's something...

This chapter is not necessary for the story line and I wouldn't blame you in the slightest if you chose to quite while it still makes sense.

Oh, I didn't quite! Hm... quite. QUITE.
Well, I didn't quit either.

Anyway, awesome story again! And would this story count as Flutterdash now? Can I add it to the Shipping group?

[flutterdashforever]

1610874 Some of the things I missed... all I can do is anyway. I wasn't sure if this makes it shipping, I did think about it but I decided that since there are people who would just quite while things still made sense then I figured they'd never get to the romance bit. That's why I didn't ad a romance tag or ad Pinkie Pie and Twilight Sparkle tags. That's a cute seal.

[Kory-Starr]

Bwahahhaha this last chapter was beautifully hilarious :"D