Sweetie Belle is having a rough time and it seems to only be getting worse.
Chapters (6)
- Member Since 14th Feb, 2022
- offline last seen 1 hour ago
Partycannon_
He / Him. Biggest Sweetie Bot fan.
Partycannon_
Joined 14th Feb, 2022 ·
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Interesting start to a Sweetie Bot story. I hope this one actually finishes.
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The story isn't going to be long so I hope to finish before the month ends.
Good to hear it! I have a few plot points planned and plenty of ways to connect them. All I need is a little bit of time and you'll have a new chapter to read in no time
A sweetie bot story? I already love it.
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look forward to
I do want to say something here given that you've commented on my user page but I don't really have much to say given how little story there is so far. So let's just go with "I look forward to following this story." You've probably guessed it, and you're exactly right. I'm going to be checking out your other stories, more specifically the Sweetie-Bot related ones (shocker I know). No worries, I'll check out your other work too.
I will say this. Sweetie Belle doesn't feel like Sweetie Belle. It's not major and I'm sure it'll be sorted out however. She is sick and tired after all, or maybe I'm just tired. I've gotten four hours of sleep since New Year (which for me was two days ago).
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Best Character to ever. 🦄
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I'm looking forward to it more.
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It's always great to hear things from others, so I'm happy to find your comment here. I somehow haven't made another Sweetie Bot story recently (other then this one). Writers, like most who create don't find their old creations too appealing, looking back on most of my stories is not that enjoyable of an experience for me. That's all to say I have a hard time recommending my old Sweetie Bot stories but each one does hold something interesting.
Steam Powered Love was the second story I ever made but is very simple and wholesome. UPF is my first story which holds more value in it starting me down this line of writing rather then a story and was made out of a deep love of MLP but far from a deep love of editing a story. Incorrect Sensors was painful to write and painful to read. While other stories I make have that 'feature' without any effort, Incorrect Sensors was made that way on purpose using the pain and corruption of a melting brain.
This is already a long message so I'll try to keep it short. Sweetie Belle not acting like herself was unintentional but I did catch it about half way through the chapter (had too much fun writing). So I made a decision and decided to play more into a 'theme' of tiredness even though it feels more akin to a depressed teen instead of a sleepless child, thus The Soulless Automaton turned into The Tired Automaton. Like you said, it will attempt to be corrected as it continues, only time will tell if I can do it properly. Outside of all that; I'm sorry to hear about your lack of sleep, hopefully you can crash soon!
Thank you all for your messages. I love responding to them, or maybe I just love to write. Have a good day and hope to see you all soon!
Well ain't that familiar, is it a reference? If it is than I already know what the reference is for.
Kinda curious on what the lore behind Sweetie Bot in this story will be, maybe the real Sweetie Belle died and her soul was transferred into the machine. If I was in Sweetie Bot's situation I would probably go to Twilight to get some answers, probably the smartest decision if Sweetie Bot was to get some answers without anyone else knowing, plus I wouldn't trust Rarity since she definitely knows something, I'm guessing Rarity wasn't aware of Sweetie having a self awareness function whenever she found out she's a robot, I wonder who put that there.
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It seemed fitting to start with the classic 'Hello World' line. Other than it's origin with code there isn't many other things I would point to. Also Pt.4a is a bop for sure.
Odd you would bring Twilight up, also odd that she is one of the five characters listed in the story's tags. Sweetie's lore will be covered.
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Oh I just realized Twilight was listed. :/
The song is also one of my favorite Sweetie Bot songs, my most favorite being pt.4b.
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Sorry if it came across as rude, my humor can be a little too dry sometimes.
Eyup, she'll be there
I'm really glad he is continuing to make more Destabilized songs. I can't wait to see him and the other artists at Harmony Con this year :>
Looking forward to more of this! Nice job mate!
A bit late to the party (well extremely late, but life ya know?), but I'm here now. As for stuff relating to the story.
Rarity is definitely knows a lot more then she is letting on, but we also know for a fact that she doesn't know everything (Given that she isn't aware of the self awareness protocol, that or she's hoping to gaslight Sweetie in spite of that). Definitely intrerested in seeing how this relation pans out as Sweetie learns more about herself, or maybe the confrontation will be after Sweetie has learnt about herself.
I also curious on Sweetie's Self Awareness Protocol has activated. Perharps as a preventative measure to stop her from freaking out about her metallic self? I'm leaning into "fatal damage requries full knowledge of her metallic self," route. Can't fix what you don't know is broken. She seem pretty knocked out over the incident, that or its the sickness I'm only now remembering about.
And no worries about the Sweetie Belle not feeling like herself thing. She may not explicitly come off as Sweetie Belle in the text but she doesn't come off as alien either, (that may turn out ironically if she is actually alien in origin). Besides we're more then capable of reading the text in sweetie's voice, and in that regard she seems fine. Looking forward to the third chapter :)
Also I agree Destabilize pt.4a/b are amazing songs and are at the top of my favorite Sweetie Bot songs.
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Glad to see you again
Rarity seems to bring a lot of speculation which I'm happy for. I am very reluctant to talk about her as I don't want to sway the ideas one way or another. I will say that the focus on the story will be changed very soon, thus Rarity will be taking a back seat.
The Self Awareness Protocol on the other hand I will explain somewhat. Self Awareness Protocol is to prevent Sweetie Belle from knowing she is a robot, once the veil is dropped everything floods into her. Sweetie being forced to sleep is a simple explanation, she is extremely stressed under this situation and her body can't handle it, it tries to calm her but fails, everything is working overtime and it can't keep up. Comparable to a crappy laptop running ARK, thus before it can crash it puts the system asleep.
How the Protocol failed is a bit more complicated and requires a little bit more reaching, I won't try to talk about it just yet. I want to try and make it more obvious in the story but if I can't fit it in how I want to I'll explain. Just know that you are somewhat correct.
Thank you for your comment and new chapter today.
I'm a little surprised Rarity isn't catching on, maybe Rarity isn't aware of the self awareness function in Sweetie Belle. Although Rarity should be concerned about the battery, I wonder when she is concerned about it.
I'm also curious why Ponyville doesn't have power and for a couple days? That seems weird.
I'm even scared for Sweetie Belle, especially when she tries to charge herself
Nice to see a new chapter aready up, and very suprised to see you answer some of my speculation. Very kind of you to give some insight to elements that most likely would've come to play later on anyway.
Having re-read the previous chapters and this one a few times, I do believe that the pacing (and overrall flow), of the story has improved. And yes this is a quite a fun chapter, although that is a given due to how more "down" (let's say), the other chapters were. Cheers to some fun Crusader shenanigans in the next chapter! Sweetie seems to be more herself too, and I can confidently say that it isn't just because of the dialogue.
Figured with the lovely little Apple Bloom I should also bring up the cover art, with the two Sweetie's and the shattered glass and all. Small and simple, but I think all art should be aplauded, great work.
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For sure! I love replying to comments. I try my best to only explain things that won't be told in the story or if you have the ability to figure yet don't reach the conclusion (usually because I'm very vague). I would talk about Rarity and things like F.A.K.E but sense I want to cover it then I'll leave that for later.
It is great to hear that I'm not alone. I'm still figuring this whole writing thing out and I hope to reach a place where I know exactly how to solve the issues with storytelling and I'm sure I will but as of now I will write and learn so I can get there. Sorry for the motivational speech there lol.
I really enjoy the cover art as well, it's simplicity is very appealing to me. Thankfully after like, a million years with pirating photoshop I know how to do some stuff with it. Some backstory is that I made tons of scrapped drafts for what would become this story, once I finally planned this one out I knew it was going to be made so I started work on the art first, then the story (None of the others ever had a mirror as a focus). Sort of funny how it works sometimes.
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It'll be tricky, that's for sure
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Obviously the power is a major plot point and I am obligated as the writer not to comment but I'm glad to hear I peaked your curiosity.
Rarity?
Interesting.....
Sorry but I have no theories on what could have made this happen.
I believe there's some kind of explosion? Maybe a some type of explosion involving electricity? If that's true than most of her skin probably has been revealed, but if Twilight was down there then she should be dead, unless she used a shield, and I doubt Twilight would just die so maybe it wasn't an explosion. Now I'm getting myself more and more confused, I'm gonna have to look this up.
Wait did Sweetie Belle explode due to overload of power? I mean if a batter can go from 5% to 100% in less than a second than.....WAIT I KNOW WHAT CAUSED IT, there was lightning wasn't there? Either that or Sweetie stepped on an exposed wire that was drawing to much power.
This should have been one of the last things to be rerouted, her voice box should have been rerouted before her hearing, what's the point in talking if you can't hear, whoever designed Sweetie Belle to lose her hearing at 5% battery is stupid.
Anyways great chapter, but a cliffhanger? Really? Next chapter better arrive soon, now you got me wanting more than ever, your gonna make me go crazy!
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Eyup, you got it. She got struck by the exposed ball of lightning. Thus it knocked her out and charged her to max, maybe a little bit unrealistic but we are talking about a consciousness inside a robot, the most unrealistic thing to ever exist. The future is going to be wild.
I am first obligated to say that speech is not a sense but if we are ruling out one first over the other then I would have to go with hearing but it will go based on perspective and the situation. Imagine a robot on low batteries, would you prefer the robot to ask for assistance or being able to hear where to get more batteries. Both are viable but still rely on others for help, the difference is that the person couldn't tell the robot where to get more batteries if the person doesn't know that is what the robot needs. It's giving information over receiving information. There are situations were one works over another, in this story it is used to create a bigger rush and more drama.
Glad to hear it. I chose to end here so I didn't have to end the chapter in the middle of important dialog to fulfill my completely arbitrary deadline. Not done out of malice, sorry. Next chapter will be out within a week.
Thank you for the comments! 
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No problem, I can't wait!
Apparently I missed the notification for this one.
This chapter is really fast paced, although the rapidly draining battery justifies it I suppose. Sweetie's battery drains alarmingly fast though.
The explosion in the end was so sudden and out of nowhere that I can't help but laugh at it in hindsight
However in the moment it is indeed a "What?" At least the battery is full.
I don't have any advice on the "heart" thing, but just letting you know that I for one don't mind if you decide to not work on the story anymore, that or delays happen. It can be tedious and tiring to work on something you don't have any drive for, I know that for certain.
Whichever decision you make just know I support it, unless that decision is murder.
Maybe you worry too much, maybe you don't, fanfiction in its nature is very lenient on writing standards. No one here is expecting a world class book, but what you learn here can help into writing said book. We're all just here to write, learn, read, and have fun after all.
I suppose its my turn to apologize for a werid motivational speech thingy. I just try to be as friendly and welcoming as within reason, the world (and the internet especially), is so prone to drama and I just think sometimes we need to step back and be more supporting and/or understanding.
Anyway bleh mushy stuff aside
, let's hope Sweetie can mitigate the oncoming consequences 
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Yeah, I meant to tweak the numbers slightly before uploading it but I felt it was okay because we didn't exactly know how long it took for them to travel to Twilight's. I quite enjoyed writing the ending too, on first writing I felt like it needed more but on second re-reading I quite enjoyed the 1 to 100.
I am going to continue the story but I will probably take your advice and not worry much about the upload schedule. I want to get into a good habit of writing daily which I have mostly succeeded in this month, only failing one day so far. Thankfully writing isn't tedious although it does require me going a bit out of my way to do.
You are right, which makes it odd that I always hold myself to a high standard even though I really haven't spent that much time writing. It's a struggle for me to put myself or ideas out there and when I don't think they are up to par, I either don't release it or apologize before others can read it. In the end that is why I am making this story, to push past the feeling of the story not being good enough, to release stories with very lite editing to practice. I just can't help but to beat myself up chapter after chapter, knowing I could do better.
I always enjoy your messages and I don't find them to be any more weird then any messages I post, if at all. So, thank you!
Gosh, I sure hope so as well.
It seems to me that now the crusaders will not check on her
Ehhhhhhhh, I don't know.....I would like some awnsers though, but I don't know if she would be willing to explain.
Atleast Twilight and Sweetie Belle's friends took it better than I expected.
Why is the text in the synopsis so much bigger than all of the other stories on here?
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It's only 20% bigger then normal. Do you have some kind of odd font that messes with the size of text? Also why do you keep asking this on my stories? It's a bit silly.
Example <normal text
Example <what the synopsis uses
My phone crashed two times while writing this so I’ll be keeping this one relatively short (probably just a sign that I need to clear out some junk).
Phew, I thought I had caused a maybe indefinite hiatus. In fact I was in my way to comment about that, but commenting about this chapter instead is way more enjoyable.
Keeping it short the main qualm (if you will), I had about this chapter is how abruptly (for lack of a better word), the
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chapters*characters act. The crusaders just kinda seem to accept Sweetie being a robot, and Twilight kinda just jumps to Sweetie being the source of the power problem. I can definitely infer why, but it’d probably be better for us to see them go through that process as well.I’ll leave that there for now, but I’ll be sure to come back and expand on my thoughts later. Glad to see you had fun at harmonycon
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I hate when that happens. Thanks for coming back each time for your comment, it always means a lot.
It would have been a sort of funny to end it on last chapter but I'm at the homestretch now. It was just pretty difficult to write this chapter, having to set it down and pick it up again didn't help.
That is what I was having the biggest problem with and why it took so long. I think more time with each character and slowing it down would have helped with that problem. I was also having the issue of Sweetie Belle hardly ever talking or adding input to conversations so I trimmed down some conversations but that was also tied to my motivation and only wanting to write down what I needed to. In the end there needed to be a new chapter and instead of perfectionism taking over, I needed to release it.
I can try to include the power explanation next chapter if you want but it was more of a background thing that led Sweetie to this point rather then an important lore thing. As you can assume, I cut a decent amount of Twilight's lines to keep the story on point.
If you have any suggestions on how you think it could have been improved I'm interested to hear (as long as your phone stops dying). Next story I am planning things out ahead of time (and hopefully getting an editor) to help with pacing and tone. This story is all over the place lol, I really need to hone that in.
Thanks again, hope to hear soon
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I thought about it overnight (why is it always during sleep hours when I get ideas?), and I've got one other thing.
The dialouge feels a bit clunky, but that was never my strongsuit. Don't know where to begin with that.
I think maybe cut out the odd threatening Twilight thing? I found that bit to be confusing, senseless, and distracting. The the removal of that should allow for more space for the characters to think and act, while keeping focus on the whole "wait sweetie belle is a robot?" thing. Let the characters settle in with that reveal.
I only brought the power up as a second point. I don't think we need a explanation, but since it was brought up we should be due for Twilight to talk to Rarity about Sweetie's power consumption. Since it's not the focus a throwaway since should do.
But yeah that's all I got, so uh. I can't really think of a way to end thi
It’s been a hot minute since I last used this site. It also appears to have been a hot minute since this story was updated (4 weeks wow time flies). May I ask how the story is doing?
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The story IS being worked on. I was very sick for a week straight so that set me back a little. Work on the final chapter is slow, the story as a whole is seen as a disappointment by me and 'working on a disappointment' is far less appealing then working on something new. Yet I still want to finish this story and provide at least a decent ending for those who got this far. I'm planning on making a blog after the final chapter to conclude my thoughts and what I learned from this story which might increase the wait time a little bit more. It's not dead, just slowly being made
Thanks for asking
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I understand the sentiment of not wanting to work on what you see as a disappointing project, but I think it’s good that you’re seeing it through. If it’s any consolation in hearing (or rather reading), it from someone else, then I say this project has been pretty successful.
It may not be very good, but I think you’d agree that as a learning experience it’s been pretty valuable. Looking forwards to seeing your thoughts. It’s always fun taking a peek into other peoples minds.
That’s probably part of why I tend to lend more bloated comments actually.
That was a strange, abrupt and unsatisfying ending. Even as of last chapter I think you could have done more. But you gave up. Not much else to say I guess.
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Sadly that description doesn't just apply to the ending. I'm not sure what I was thinking posting the first chapter, I guess I'm more interested in posting content then making sure of it's quality, I'll attempt to fix that. I hope you find a better, more enjoyable fan fiction to read.