The Unshed Light

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Rarity can't think of a dress idea.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 8 )

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siborg212

siborg212 #1 · Sep 30th, 2012 · · ·

Not bad. It was pretty short, and the problem got fixed to quickly, without delay or anything going wrong, but I enjoyed it. Thumbs up.

EpicGuy

EpicGuy #2 · Sep 30th, 2012 · · ·

That was very nice, albeit a little short. I laughed at the ending picture.

Scribblestick

Scribblestick #3 · Oct 1st, 2012 · 2 · ·

It was a fun story with an interesting concept, but I didn't think you did enough with it. It felt more like a re-enactment of "Lesson Zero" with Rarity instead of Twilight, down to the arbitrary deadline an the ticking sun clock. There wasn't really any character development or growth, and the resolution just kind of fell flat.

The ending picture didn't make a lot of sense to me. But then, I hate it when people put pictures in stories anyway. Unless it's meant for little kids. Then it's okay.

Anywho. Hope this helps.

Bluebirdd065

Bluebirdd065 #4 · Oct 1st, 2012 · · ·

Yeah, I know the story's not great, but to be honest, it's because I've been having a hard time comin' up with ideas.

And the feedback does help, so thank you!

Dusty Sage

Dusty Sage #5 · Oct 1st, 2012 · · ·

A sweet little tale, the crack about the CMCs "ripping the town a new one" notwithstanding.

Periphery

Periphery #6 · Oct 1st, 2012 · · ·

I almost want to down-vote this just because of that picture at the end. I freakin' hate that meme, and I've been seeing it like 3 times a day for the last few weeks.