• Member Since 30th Jul, 2015
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

origami


Just falling through this tempest called life

Comments ( 3 )

The tapping on the window thing sounds familiar

Ok, first of all, pretty interesting story.I enjoy ghost stories greatly.Now for some criticism I have regarding the story:
1-"maybe she commited suicide or Hearth killed her"- I don't know, but in my opinion, he phrased that so conveniently.What if she killed herself because of the shame?or for any other reason?since it looked like a suicide, why was he so quick to assume someone else murdered Gypsum?I thought he was a writer not a detective lol
2-so he's disgusted because Hearth slept with both his cousin and daughter.But did he knew that?the story doesn't say if he actually knew that Ruby was his cousin and Gypsum his daughter.What if Ruby never told him that Gypsum is his daughter?
3-the spike thing was confusing.So in a basement room was a random hole with a spike in it?why exactly?
Other than that, I pretty much enjoyed the story

11677434
I wrote this kinda quickly to get it released in time for Halloween. I have the intention of rewriting it for this year and fixing some of the mistakes I made.

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