I am the KnightMare, a creature of darkness, and I have come to destroy my own kind in search of redemption.
In an attempt to save his now dead wife, Victor Fries; aka Mr. Freeze lands in Equestria, and after saving the lives of its inhabitants he becomes a permanent resident, protecting his friends as the vigilantee The Frostbitten Colt. He seeks redemption, and he may find it from a certain animal loving Pegasus.
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Now this is an entertaining and intersting idea concept to look into. I mean Mr. Freeze was always one of the Batman villains that had a bit of a moral goal in his gimick.
This is some idea and I wish to read more from it as it could be an interesting tale. Plus, I wonder if the so call "Bat-mare" will make an appearance in this story or so ?
Please do keep up the good work upon such a great idea like this one.
hmm its an intersting start, but i'm not entirly sure if this is gonna be awesome or just a nice try
Well lets track and see
"An armored pony, with some kind of icy weapon in his hand."
what.
Other than that and a few misused words, I will be happily be tracking this interesting story.
I read the synopsis.
My first reaction: Oh, this looks fucking awesome."
I won't mince words; I thought this was going to be sooooooooooooo retarded. However, this fic made the mistake of being well written, easy to read, enjoyable and a whole bunch of other nice words. I can't wait to see what happens next. THIS WAS SO GOOD.
What's left to say the story took a great Batman villain gave him an awesome back story and reason to be in Equestria. I like his character and way the other ponies react to him. This the first time I've ever approved of a transformed human in Equestria fic, mostly cause it isn't a standard shipfic it's got great pacing, dialogue and action. Some parts even tug at the heartstrings. Kudos to you my good sir.
Peace Out.
As thewaffler said, it's a good fic. I have nothing else to add. 4.5/5 Tracking.
fantastic
Very nice. Could use some revision, and slightly better pacing, as well as having 'The Frostbitten Colt' be something the populace dubbs him. Like the forever frozen lake.
This is where the Doctor comes in and stops you.
I am going to favorite this because the plot behind it sounds interesting. HOWEVER, until it is completed, I am going to give it a thumbs down. Because while I may approve of the plot behind the story, I DO NOT approve of the fact that it has been 3 years and 13 days since the last update. I mean, I understand that greatness can't be rushed, but needing 1108 days in order to update the next chapter means one of three things. A: You've given up on the book (this is the most likely scenario). B: You've decided to come out with the rest of the book on the Christmas of the 3rd Christmas after this book was first published (This scenario is so unlikely that it is ridiculous that I am even putting it in this comment). Or C: You're dead (this is a scenario with a 50% probability chance, seeing as how people die every day.) If option C makes you feel uncomfortable than that means two things. You are obviously not dead, and I am sorry for having that be one of the three possibilities. Also, don’t give up! Your fans deserve better! I, of course, meant that in the best and most encouraging possible way.
5408724 But it's crap! (Obviously Option 1 but I've been considering rewriting it.) Ah, you make me feel terrible. With University and getting a job I've found myself so busy that writing only comes with difficulty. Oh well, we'll see what happens.
5420311
Well, if 42 people like it, then those 42 people feel that it is not crap. If 42 people like it, then those 42 people should be the people that you listen to, not your own doubts. For example, take mbpony 512's comment at the bottom of the page. He said
while he probably meant to say, Plus, I wonder if the so call "Bat-mare" will make an appearance in this story or not?, the point is that he both gave you encouragement and provided a possible story idea for you to work with.
Then there's FascinationUnlimited's comment, in which he gave both gave a suggestion about how the story should be fixed as it is taking place in the My Little Pony universe, and he also gave you encouragement. He said,
Then there's La Barata's comment in which he gave you even more encouragement! He said
So, in reaction to what you said about this story being crap, I have just one thing to say: Let the fans decide if your work is crap or not. If no one likes your work, then it is indeed crap. If people actually do like your work, then it is not crap.
Now, I understand that having a job makes it hard to write, but you should still consider continuing this story in your free time. If you feel that you absolutely must redo the first chapter, try to stick to it as closely as possible, in order to avoid disappointing your 42 fans that liked your first chapter. Also, as for making you feel terrible,
5420414 Alright. I intended to put up an edit of this story on Christmas Day, with more chapters to follow, but I was busy with family. However you have made me determined to press on (the clip of Palpatine was brilliant by the way) and so I shall be posting an edit within the next two days, with at least one more chapter before the New Year that I WILL complete. Before I begin I would ask of you one piece of advice. Should Victor be changed into a pony as I wrote originally or do you think it would work better with him in human form?
Thank you for pushing me to move forward. Although I still think major parts of the whole Fire Salamander bit was just dreadful after re-reading I am most happy with everything else. I am rather surprised by myself by how well I characterized Victor and Luthor. Merry Christmas!
5425912
It was my pleasure to help push you to go forward in the story, yes the clip of Palpatine was indeed brilliant wasn't it?, as for your asking me about advice of whether or not Victor should be a pony like you originally wrote or if he should remain human, I should probably tell you that I have yet to actually read the story (as I was more concerned with the fact that it was an incomplete story), however the 42 people that gave this story a thumbs up all seem to think that keeping Victor as a pony is the way to go (seeing as how they gave the original story a thumbs up, but rewriting certain parts of the story shouldn't hurt the amount of people that like it, just as long as you keep to the original plot in the long run.) I personally feel that it would be weird if a human and a pony had an intimate relationship (at least, I think that is where you are going with this story.) (There are exceptions to this rule, however, like I said, the 42 people that gave this story a thumbs up all seem to think that keeping Victor as a pony is the way to go, seeing as how they gave the original story a thumbs up, but rewriting certain parts of the story shouldn't hurt the amount of people that like it, just as long as you keep to the original plot in the long run.)
5425912 you need to do more my friend well done
5425912
more please