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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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UPDATE! and that's ONE way to find out where the Red Hive is!
Well, looks like Jerry Lee Lewis is back on the playlist.
Is Pinkie going to ask Overlord about his Eye Of Seeinround?
Did Chrysalis get her express trip back to the Badlands like in cannon?
Is the basement door, stairs and access nooks there for DLC and construction expansion etc? New dungeons, labs, minion production and training areas, even resource farms?
7757863 *Eye Of Seeinround?*
And I was trying to NOT be blatantly ripping off Sauron. Oh, who am I kidding, I was blatantly ripping off Sauron, I just wanted mine to move around...
And maybe!
7757855 *brings out the popcorn and drinks*
Here we go
*looks around for chips and the dip*
....
I knew i forgot something
Uhm... you happen to have any chips?
Dip is optional though.... just want to have some if anyone wants it
7757921 i have some chips and the dip
bodybalance4you.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/chips_dip.jpg
Yeah, that eye spell is great, but here's the deal:
Can it see why kids love captain crunch?
the Eye Spy is a lovely spell, im sure that will be good for wacky hijinks later.
from a narrative perspective, this chapter is too short. not just the wordcount, but it feels rushed. like you pushed through a number of narrative points too quickly, and missed one or two chapters worth of stuff happening.
bored
they're
7758033 Thank. Changed.
7757927
Oh my Gosh. IT'S DIP
7757927 thank you
This was a good chapter!! A lil short for my tastes though....
Yup, I'm sorry, but I am now imagining this guy as sauron, what with the whole eye on a tower thing.
7758622 It's not ON the tower though. He just controls it FROM the tower, silly.
Great Chapter but i'm wondering how is your new story going to affect the waiting times between this one's chapters?
7758672 I am still visioning him as Sauron, and the changlings as orc, sheeple as goblins, and Diamond dogs as uraki. Now we just need a ring, and and some Nazaghul, then we can go find some hobbits.
7758838 What with him gathering a lot of the dark species I can see him looking like Sauron. Also there is the fact that the Overlord in the games was a satire of Sauron and other evil overlords. Hence the tower and small evil, somewhat stupid minions that will happily kill themselves for their master.
7758865 We still need the ponies as hobbits.
7759012 I think the ponies would be better as the Men of Gondor, maybe the breezys could be the hobbits.
7759095 Ok, but the griffons are dwarfs. Who would be elves?
7759253 probably the deer from the IDW comics.
7759095
7759253
7759351 The better question is, who would be the Rohirrim? The Saddle Arabians? Or perhaps the ponies of the Crystal Empire?
Edit: At this rate one of you is eventually gonna go 'fuck it' and write a ponified LOTR triligy.
7759862 If i wrote it i would make it more of a slapstick parody.
7759862 Thinking about it. Just trying to figure out the most important question of all. Who would be Golem, and where are my pancakes?
7759862 Also, could totally see the empire as the horse people.
I really enjoyed this. Like and track, in case you continue it.
Well, the fact that the idiot Red Minions called him Master didn't help. Maybe if he left some Browns to see if they could help with any rebuilding that the Reds might have caused than that would have really helped. Still, kinda loved in a way that you just left them all with a "Wtf?" face.
7767666 Thank you for the criticism, I will try to address some of the things you have said. However I ask that you not stop reading my story, after all how am I supposed to get better if I'm not made aware of what I'm doing wrong? I will look forward to your next criticisms and hope that I can make this story a really great one... that sounded cheesy, but it is true so...
Again, thank you for your words, and I will try to pull something together in the story as an answer.
7767742
Alright, I'll bookmark it and give it a chance again at some point, but right now, I don't really find this very engaging.
Is the mace the overlord is wielding The Apocalyptor?
7757902 When you described the Eye I knew instantly it was the eye of sauron
Can someone make fan art for this? Pleeeeease?
I think you meant 'revealed'.
7758622
With that description of how it works, it sounds more like the Ogre Magi ability 'Eye of Kilrogg' from Warcraft 2.
*They're
That was amusing.
Would he be willing to kill one of the main six
This outcome... i find acceptable
This would be hilarious indeed
I got kinda lord of the rings vibes in the chapter...
Expected pre Nightmaremoon time when he could find the mane six...
What a twist... He forced Chrysalis into the invasion
CMC Overlord chaos squad
The Reds are back! One more nest to return...
Interessting first meeting...