• Published 6th Oct 2016
  • 14,706 Views, 2,921 Comments

I Am a Pet Changeling - Queen Sanguine Dreams

A simple Tunneler drone is catapulted from Equestria during the infamous Wedding onto earth. Confused, injured and alone, the drone must figure out how to survive with the whole world watching. (Changeling on Earth, Xcom, Men in Black and SG:1 Xover)

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Developments in Equestria, Part 1

Far away from the planet Earth was a land known as Equestria, ruled by two immortal god-sisters known as Celestia and Luna. Under them, were the goddesses of Love and Friendship, known as Cadance and Twilight, and all of whom were revered by the populace of Pegasus, Unicorns and Earth Ponies. Their cities and towns stretched all across the land of Equestria, from places lush in culture to arid deserts where life seldom made an appearance. In the city of Manehattan there was a secret meeting being held. A meeting that under normal circumstances wouldn't have been conceived until the end of time. A meeting of hives, and more specifically, the advisers to separate hives from all across Equestria. Changelings, disguised as the unknowing ponies that they harvested love from in order to survive.

"Can I get you anything?" A waitress asked in her best customer service voice. "Perhaps a water to start you off?"

The group of mares and stallions, all in varying levels of attire ranging from a trench-coat and expensive suit to nothing at all stared with unsmiling faces at the waitress for an uncomfortable amount of time, each not saying a word.

"I'll just... come around again later!" The waitress smiled nervously before making a hasty retreat from the table. Unknown to the waitress or those at the local diner, these ponies wouldn't be ordering a single thing from any menu.

The largest of the ponies, dressed in a trenchcoat and a black suit, set down a rather fancy looking hat onto the table, pressed their hooves together and leaned forward. Their voice was deep, as if it wouldn't be out of place on a rock golem. "What's the word; another disappearance?"

A skinny pegasus mare nodded, also leaning in so that she wouldn't be overheard. "Two last night, Big Boss. We can't keep hiding these queens if Chrysalis keeps finding 'em somehow."

The large pony, apparently known as Big Boss, waved a hoof in caution. "No names, not here."

The other ponies nodded, sharing looks of worry and concern. "She came in through the roof of the apartment; not a scratch on her. Just pulled up this strange glowing looking thing and ZAP! No more queens." A nervous looking stallion in a black hooded sweatshirt provided, tugging on the strings of the hood as their eyes darted around the ponies at the table. "This can't keep happenin'; not like this."

"You sure it was the Big C?" Boss asked the nervous stallion. "You get a good look at the glowing thing?"

The stallion nodded eagerly. "It was her, and it was big- like the size of a dog- and it glowed orange and yellow. Ain't never seen nothin' like it before, and I really hope I never see it again. She just busted in through the roof, pointed it at eh... the 'VIPs', and zapped 'em out of existence." Shaking his head from side to side the stallion affirmed, "Nope, never wanna see that thing again."

Big Boss nodded, looking to the rest of the group. "Have any of you seen somethin' like this before? Any ideas on how she's trackin' us?"

"We're all from different 'neighborhoods', so I got no idea." The skinny mare replied with a shrug. "Heck, we don't even take the same love, so that isn't a commonality either."

"Should we get somepony to help us with this?" A quiet mare asked from near the back of the table. "We aren't making any progress on our own, and this situation is getting out of control." She wore wire frame glasses and a white overcoat, a uniform that wouldn't be out of place at a university or lab.

"An' just who do you suggest we get to help us with this?" Big Boss asked sincerely, his hooves held together in an arch on the table. "Nopony is gonna help us after the 'C' pulled that stunt in Canterlot."

"What about King Thorax?" The quiet mare suggested, holding up a hoof to ward off the hissing at the mention of his name. "I know he's a traitor to all of us, but he has contacts that we don't."

"There's no way I'm workin' with that usurper, even if it was the C's hive he took, its still not right." The skinny mare protested. "Especially if he insists on turning us into whatever he became." She crossed her hooves in front of her chest and finished with a grumbling of "Freak."

"Why do we need help from Thorax?" Big Boss asked, entertaining the idea.

"He has good relations with Princess Cadance, and if we get on their side, we'll have enough love to last us until we can get our 'bosses' back, assuming that's even possible. In either case, we won't be able to feed our 'families' on our own, not without the bosses." The quiet mare continued, adjusting her glasses. "So with time against us, and the C not wanting to go anywhere near the Crystal Empire, I say we head there as a group and confront Princess Cadance about the issue."

"What makes you think she won't just blast us to smithereens like she did with the C's hive?" the nervous stallion asked, his eyes wide with worry.

"She's the Princess of Love, and she gave Thorax a chance. All we gotta do is go there, ask for help, and make things real worrying for her so she'll fix things." the quiet mare replied with certainty. "I'm sure she won't like all of our 'neighborhoods' squatting on her empire until our 'bosses' are back."

"What about the guards?" the skinny mare asked. "And what about Shining Armor?"

"I'm thinking we'll need an insurance plan if we're gonna do this. Somepony important to 'em." Big Boss suggested. "Who was that one pony that messed up things for the C at the wedding; Twinkle?"

"Twilight." The nervous stallion corrected. "She's an Alicorn now. Not tha best idea to go messin' with her."

"Alright, so its a no-go on Twilight. Who else do we got?" Big Boss asked the group.

"Still doing alright?" The waitress again asked to the groups surprise, startling the quiet and nervous ponies.

"We're doin' fine." the skinny mare grumbled.

"Just checking!" The waitress replied before darting away.

"How 'bout that pet dragon of hers?" The skinny mare suggested after watching the Waitress retreat to a safe distance from the table. She had a smile that screamed mischievous idea. "I think somethin' happened in the Crystal Empire that made 'em a hero, so if we capture that dragon baby then we'll have a good bargaining chip, yeah?"

"We know where to find him?" Big Boss asked, giving the kind of frown that implied hopeful optimism with unexpected outcomes.

"He should be visiting tonight, as it happens." The quiet mare provided. "He's visiting an art gallery with one of the Princess's friends; somepony named 'Rarity' I think."

The large stallion motioned towards the door, directing the group to take the rest of the conversation outside. "You know the place?" Boss asked, putting on his hat and pushing the table away from his chair, as his bulk would not allow him to move himself from the table. It scratched across the hardwood flooring with an attention getting screech of protesting friction, causing the entire room to stare at him. "My bad." he apologized, setting a bag onto the table. "This should cover it."

The other ponies at the table quickly hid their faces from the crowd, following Big Boss as he bulldozed his way through the tables, apologizing all the way through. At the back of the restaurant, a very happy waitress with stars in her eyes nabbed the bag of bits and hid them away from the management as a 'tip' for her excellent service.

Once outside, the conversation of the changelings in disguise continued. The quiet mare spoke first as they walked along the noisy sidewalk in the morning weather, a light drizzle coming from above. "It's supposed to be some kind of 'past advances in fashion' gallery, showcasing all kinds of clothing from before the rise of Nightmare Moon to present day. Rarity is there as part of her own creations are being awarded a slot in the 'present day' category. Spike is following Rarity in attendance as either a poor excuse for a body guard or as a friend." she replied in confusion. "Sometimes I don't understand ponies and their obsession with friendship."

"You're an Infiltrator Adviser, so you should know this kind of thing." The nervous stallion mentioned, nudging the quiet mare.

"Don't use our titles in public, ya idiot!" the skinny mare hissed, nudging the nervous stallion into Big Boss.

"Hey, quit messing around." The large mass of muscle warned. "We've got a dragon to steal."

Later that night...

"Remind me why I'm hanging upside down in this getup?" The skinny mare asked, dangling via rope from a rooftop overhang dressed in a black turtleneck sweater with matching face-mask and socks. "How am I supposed to catch a dragon with this junk on?"

"Hush; they help you blend in." The quiet mare explained, fiddling with some arcane device while the nervous stallion kept watch on the roof of the Art Gallery building. Down below there were spotlights shining into the air next to a red carpet, with fancy carriages arriving to disgorge the wealthy and pompous of the city before departing just as quickly. Cameras would flash and the crowd would ride a wave of excitement for each new arrival, their adoration crashing into the disguised changelings hiding from sight.

"Blend in? Really?" The skinny mare asked, bursting into flame to become a far darker color of earth pony with grey pupils. "Why don't I just look like this instead?"

The quiet mare rolled her eyes before replying with annoyance, "It's the spirit of the occasion, you know? We're technically breaking into a fashion gallery, so we may as well look good doing it. Honestly, I don't know how you infiltrated pony society before I came along."

"I think you've gone native, lady." the skinny mare quipped, and soon yelped as her harness was dropped a foot downward.

The quiet mare smugly stared over the ledge at the skinny mare in victory. "Just go down there, get the dragon, and get to the garage. Got it?"

"Yeah, on it." The skinny mare grumbled, descending into the art gallery's unattended section filled with covered paintings.

"You think this is gonna work?" The nervous stallion asked, peering into the abyss below. "I mean, what if she gets spotted?"

The quiet mare waved a hoof at the stallion and scoffed. "Please, what are they going to do; send a physical description of a shape-shifter?"

"Well, all somepony has ta do is yell 'changeling' and the place will explode in panic." The stallion pointed out. "Speakin' of that, where's Big Boss?"

"He's downstairs, running 'security' for the event. Boss is going to open the garage as soon as the other one bags the dragon." The quiet mare explained. "Speaking of which, we should get our escape carriage right now."

The nervous stallion watched the quiet mare burst into flame, granting herself the wings of a pegasus before jumping off the side of the building. With worry, he too shifted wings of his own and followed soon after into the streetlamp lit night.


"Oh Rarity, these dresses look... nice?" Spike offered uncertainly, joined to Rarity's side. He had accompanied his friend to the grand unveiling of both her latest design as well as newest bragging point of high pony society in the fashion scene, The fashionista herself sporting a white and purple accented dress of her own creation with sky blue gems that played in with her natural colors and cutie mark. Part of her latest creative set was devoted to enhancing and displaying a pony's natural beauty and grace, and of course none would be able to better showcase that than Rarity herself. Spike himself was wearing a black and white Tuxedo with black bow tie, his bottom claws exposed.

"Well, I do admire the effort put into these dresses," Rarity replied with cautious praise, "But some of these I just simply don't understand." She pointed to an outfit that was a cross between an ancient farmer and statespony rolled into one, tied together by the bootstraps of early Pegasus military. "Maybe they were trying to combine the fashions of all the tribes into an ensemble?" she thought, tapping her chin.

"Lady Rarity!" A voice called out, revealing a rather dark coated mare that appeared to have missed one too many meals for the sake of appearance. "Such a delight to see you here." The mare continued with the practiced voice of civility known for events like this. "Who is your friend, if you don't mind my asking?" She inquired, looking to Spike.

"Oh!" Rarity blurted in surprise, "This would be my dear friend and absolute life-saver, Spike the Brave and Magnificent." motioning reverently to Spike himself, who puffed his chest and adjusted his small bow tie.

"Yep, that's me!" Spike declared, offering a hand to shake.

"And who might you be, Miss...?" Rarity asked as the skinny mare shook Spike's talon.

"Miss Alter Eco, At your service." The mare replied pleasantly, performing a small head bow. "I deal mostly with gourmet chocolates from other nations and bringing their recipes to Equestria." She added proudly.

Rarity's eyebrows went up in surprise, as did her voice. "Wow! That must be very interesting work. I wasn't aware that other nations even had chocolates of their own."

Miss Alter Eco smiled. "Very much so! I heard there was a Griffon chef in Equestria not too long ago for a cake competition, if I am correct?"

Rarity smiled nervously, "I may have been there for that, actually."

Seeing the dialogue between Alter Eco and Rarity was beginning to bore Spike, and he quickly excused himself from the conversation in search of the punch bar. Rarity and Miss Eco conversed about Chocolates and differences in fashion design for a few minutes before ultimately parting ways on a positive note. With Spike and Rarity separated, it was now up to 'Alter Eco' to kidnap Spike before he rejoined Rarity.


Big Boss, is the back door opened? The voice of the quiet mare inquired. The members of the changeling group were communicating through a series of rune engraved square stones that projected voices only to the wearers of the stone, which made planning far easier over distance. We're pulling the carriage in the back now.

"On it." The deep voice of Big Boss rumbled. He had been standing at a guard point inside the art gallery that was supposed to ward off curious party goers from the wine storage area by assuming the appearance of one of the gallery security. Nopony was around to notice Boss sneaking off and it was moments before he found his way through the unused painting collection held in the building's storage area to open a garage door. Just in time, the carriage pulled up with the quiet mare and the nervous stallion in front, waiting expectantly while harnessed to the device.

"Where is she? Where is the dragon?" the quiet mare hissed.

The nearby door soon burst open to the sounds of screaming party goers, a very dark mare leaping from the door's caution taped platform and onto the cold concrete just below. On her back was a very drowsy purple and green dragon in a small tuxedo.

"What's happening? Rarity, is that you?" He mumbled, attempting to right himself on the mare's back.

"Get him in the back!" The nervous stallion insisted, motioning to the open carriage door with his head. Big Boss opened the door, and the mare leapt into the back along with the dragon. No sooner than had she landed inside did the door to the Gallery open once more, a very upset mare in a white and purple dress with half a salad in her mane standing in the doorway with the chaos of confused and dazed ponies scrambling behind her in the light.

"We gotta go now!" the quiet mare shouted, Big Boss leaping atop the vehicle while slamming the carriage door shut.

"Get back here, you criminals!" The mare in the doorway shouted, salad flying freely from her mane as her horn lit up in a sky blue to hold the wheels of the vehicle in place.

Try as they might, the quiet mare and nervous stallion pulled and tugged all they wished, but the mare's magic was too powerful. That, or they had become too weak from lack of love. Big Boss jumped from the top of the carriage, grabbing the reigns from both of them and began pulling with all his might, inching the carriage forward.

"Oh no you don't!" The angered mare insisted, lifting the entire carriage into the air and causing Big Boss to fall onto the floor. Spike then opened the carriage door in confusion only for it to be slammed shut by 'Alter Eco' soon after. "You're not taking Spike from me!" she shouted as the quiet mare and nervous stallion were dangling helplessly from the carriages harnesses, attempting to free themselves in a panic.

"What's up with this mare?" Alter Eco yelled from inside the carriage. "This thing must weigh as much as a boulder! How's she stoppin' us?"

"It will take more than a boulder's weight to stop me from saving my friend!" The mare yelled, dropping the carriage and the other two changelings on top of Big Boss in a cloud of smoke that shattered the wheels of the vehicle and sent splinters and wood in every direction. Apparently the elegant construction of the carriage didn't account for high impact arguments with gravity and fashionistas on a magical, salad dressed rampage.

Dazed and confused, Big Boss along with the quiet mare and nervous stallion stumbled around in the dust attempting to regain both their balance and senses. It was too late for them, however, as Rarity used the unhinged door of the carriage to smack the three of them across the face and into the land of unconsciousness, where they immediately lost their pony disguises and collapsed into a heap of bruised changelings on the slightly damp streets outside of the gallery.

Huddling in the wreckage of the carriage sat Alter Eco and Spike. Alter more out of a sense of fear and self preservation, Spike out of confusion and a foggy perception of reality. Her mane in tangles and damp with sweat, Alter slowly turned her head toward the now quickly approaching Rarity, noticing her horn still alight with retribution.

"It wasn't my plan, I swear!" Alter insisted, raising her hooves in surrender. "We weren't gonna hurt 'em!"

Narrowing her eyes in suspicion, Rarity regarded the mare known to her as Alter Eco, and judging from the changelings laying in a heap nearby, she was certain that this mare was actually a changeling in disguise as well. Only one way to find out for certain, however. Raising the door of the carriage once more and pulling the mare from the wreckage, she dangled Alter Eco by the tail in the air, using the door as a nearby source of worry.

"Just one question, dear." Rarity asked in her most nonplussed voice. "Why were you trying to steal my Spikey-Wikey?"

Alter blinked in confusion. "Your what?"

Rarity's tone changed to one of imminent doom for Alter. "Why. Where you trying. To steal. Spike."

Fortunately for a changeling, turning sheet white is not a difficult task. Unfortunately for a changeling, that expression of speech is quite literal when their self control fails them, as Alter's coat burst into a flame that changed the coloration to a shade of white used primarily in military surrender. Letting out a whimper, she replied with "We... need... help?"

Expecting a door to the face, Alter shielded her body with her forehooves and braced for impact. A few moments passed, and she was soon dropped to the floor in a cloud of carriage debris. At the same moment, a team of security guards arrived with Royal Guard in tow.

"Ma'am, are you alright?" A guard asked, cautiously approaching the scene of devastation before noticing the heap of changelings. "Ma'am?" He asked again with heightened worry.

Rarity, for her part, adjusted her mane into a pony tail and flipped it to the side with her magic, ensuring bits of stray lettuce and salad made their way to the floor. "Everything is fine, darlings. Miss Rarity has it under control." she finished with a proud stomp of her hoof on the ground, a cloud of dust puffing up and the motion causing Alter to curl into a ball.

"You're... you're sure?" A guard asked as a piece of carriage fell from its embedded home in the ceiling. "It looks like a bomb went off in here!"

Rarity motioned with her forehoof for the guard to not worry. "Oh, it's fine, I assure you. I've dealt with far worse than a group of changelings, darling. Would you mind doing something for me?" She added to the surprise of the guards.

"What would that be, Ma'am?" The Royal Captain replied, stepping to her side.

"Would you be a dear and let Princess Twilight Sparkle know that I need to see her immediately?" Rarity replied with a self contented grin and batting eyelashes.

"Right away, Miss Rarity." The guard saluted before running off.

"Spike, are you alright?" Rarity called, walking past the cowering Alter Eco into the debris of the carriage. Inside, Spike sat in a daze while holding his head, attempting to keep it upright. His suit was slightly torn in a few places and he was covered in dust, but he was mostly unharmed.

"I- I think so. My head keeps spinning." Spike replied drowsily.

"I think they may have Spiked the punch, if I may be so bold." Rarity smiled, lifting her friend onto her back with her magic and returning to the center of the room.

"Hah." Spike sleepily laughed, "Good one."

With the changelings unconscious or cowering, It was now Rarity's turn to figure out just what the plan of these changelings was, aside from kidnapping Spike, of course. Twilight would take next to no time in getting here, but Rarity was no stranger to detective work. Her questions would be answered, and she would be able to dress the part just for the occasion!

This was going to be fun!

Author's Note:

I return from the land of no writing!

A lot has changed in a short amount of time in my life, but I was able to write out this chapter. I know its a bit longer than usual, and I hope my writing doesn't suffer for that, but I felt that I owed it to all of you for not having posted anything in over a month.

In related news, Donations to my Patreon would be extremely welcomed and appreciated! It helps my ability to write when I know that I have some sort of income, as I am no longer employed :twilightoops:


Even a pledge of a single dollar would help! Thank you for your patience, and I'd love to hear from you in the comments about the happenings in Equestria due to Chrysalis zapping away queens.

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