• Published 22nd Sep 2016
  • 879 Views, 29 Comments

Illicit Snacks - tosety



Human snacks are illegal. Thus, there is now a black market for snack food.

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"Daddy Daughter Time" (by TechOgre)

The evening was clear and cool with a light breeze. Alex could just smell the scent of flowers from the Flower sister’s fields over the merrily crackling campfire. Dash would be away a few days on some kind of friendship business the Elements were involved in these days. It was a perfect night to spend time with his daughter.

Alex sighed happily, "Nights like these, pumpkin, I love sitting here, in the backyard, by the fire, sipping a martini with my wonderful daughter."

Scootaloo snuggled into her dad’s side, enjoying the warmth. "Can I have another olive with mine, dad?"

Alex smiled, “You bet, pumpkin.” He skewered two fat stuffed olives and put them in her tumbler.

Scootaloo sighed contentedly, sipping from her glass. She was satisfied to sit in silence, enjoying Luna’s starry night, but her conscience was tweaking her. She had done a bad thing, and she had to get it off her chest.

She began hesitantly, “Dad?”

He finished his sip, “Yes, pumpkin?”

The little filly steeled herself, “If I tell you something, do you promise not to get mad?”

His body stiffened oh so slightly, then he carefully replied, “I reserve the right to be angry if the situation warrants it.”

She thought about that and knew she could trust him to be fair, “Alright.” Scoots took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I had a salted caramel bar.”

The silence was deafening. It was finally interrupted by Alex taking a long sip from his drink before speaking. ”I see. And where did you get this salted caramel bar?”

Scootaloo gulped, deciding to come clean, “Lyra Heartstrings.”

There was another long silence and another long sip. Finally Alex muttered, “…urge to smack a filly rising.”

Scootaloo pulled away and gulped, “Dad, you promised not to get mad.”

He turned to face his daughter. “I said I reserved my right to be angry. I’m taking that right with both hands and my legs wrapped around it.”

Scoots rolled her eyes, “Come on, Dad. It was just one candy bar. What’s the big deal?”

Alex, indignant at his daughter’s flippant response, “What’s the big deal. What’s the big deal? Sweetie, it’s not like a Rum Bar, it had salt, not kid friendly alcohol. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to have a talk with an incredibly irresponsible pony.”

Scootaloo pleaded, “Dad! Don’t hurt aunty Lyra! Aunty Bonbon would never forgive you!”

Alex, controlling his rage only said, “Only her feelings, pumpkin. Only her feelings.”

Comments ( 8 )

Pfft, salt peddler!

Need to see Pinkie eating dip sticks.

7598169

Nono... Pinkie with Pixie Stix.:twilightoops:

7602164 That's what I meant.

This story is a thing of brilliance, and I am delighted that I came across it. I especially liked the line, "it had salt, not kid-friendly alcohol". :rainbowlaugh:

7687654
well, in a world where alcohol has virtually no effect, but salt gets you drunk, seems like a perfectly reasonable statement :twilightsmile:

glad you liked it

APS

I wonder what rainbow dash would think about skittles :rainbowhuh:

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