• Published 13th Aug 2016
  • 1,036 Views, 23 Comments

Monsoon - Arcelia



Derpy has a talk with somepony very special.

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Monsoon

Monsoon

By Arcelia

The cold, wet drops of rain showered the pony in their miserable downpour before filling in the cracks beneath her. Through the stone they ran, before dripping to the ground below. With only her little blue umbrella to cover the small portion of her back and head, she sat there, watching as a little lady bug crawled its way to cover.



Her eyes cast down to her little companion which now sat by her side, taking shelter under her umbrella. But the lady bug’s efforts were aimless, for the large holes in her parasol gave way to the water that fell from the sky.



She looked up at the eternal grey above, not one bit of sunshine came through the thick layers of clouds that covered the sky. Derpy sat there and thought about all the ponies who had come this way before her. All the curious little fillies who had gazed up at this magnificent statue and wondered who it depicted. It was a question that so few knew the answer to, if only…



Perhaps, in the centuries that were to pass, ponies would find this figure carved from stone and try to identify them. If she stayed here forever, would they find her too? Would they think she was an important pony? Would they think she held an important correspondence to the statue? Or would they see it as a mere coincidence?



Derpy wondered if somepony would ever carve a statue of her someday, so that she could be forever remembered as somepony who made a difference. Somepony worthy of remembering. Or perhaps, she would die and only ever be the simple little mare that delivered ponies' mail. The pony who could never quite figure how to fly in a straight line and sometimes sent packages to the wrong address. Maybe there was nobility in humility.



Despite working everyday but Sunday and despite the fact that she was the only pony who could deliver the mail, Derpy still felt... unappreciated. Anytime something went wrong, it was always her fault. It didn’t matter if she had nothing to do with the reason a package hadn’t arrived on time, or the mail cart that came down from Canterlot having a broken wheel. She always took the blame.



Which is precisely why she had decided to take a day off. She didn’t care that it was Tuesday morning and everypony wanted their newspaper, she didn’t care if somepony got their bills a day late. She just needed a day to sit out in the pouring rain and enjoy the company of a tiny insect.



A warm, happy feeling grew in her heart and somehow, she knew that she was doing the right thing. Like some part of her was finally letting go, finally being released. Whether or not she would be remembered wasn’t important anymore, what was important was her being satisfied with her existence. Her place in the world and how she played a part in the overall grand scheme of things. Which was mostly to deliver ponies mail. But maybe that was okay, maybe she could be happy with that.



After all, there was no need for recognition, just the appreciation of one pony. To know that just one pony saw the efforts she put in and appreciated them.



Along the path, a tall, figure approached in the distance. Her eyes peered to see who it was, but the heavy fog shrouded the pony in a grey mist. Derpy sat and waited, hoping that she had not disturbed the spirit that resided within the marvelous statue.



“I thought I might find you out here.” spoke a voice.



Derpy’s gaze shifted from the ground up to the pony standing before her. “P-Princess Celestia?”



“I apologize for startling you, but I thought you could use some company,’ she said, her eyes fixating on the little lady bug that rested on the stone. ‘I see you’ve made a new friend.”



She looked down at the insect. “Oh. Why yes I have, Your Majesty.”



Princess Celestia smiled at her, filling the mare with a glow warmer than the sun. “Well, I’m certainly glad to see it. I’ve always liked seeing my subjects make new friends, pony or not.”



“Um, if you don’t mind me asking, your highness, why are you out here anyway? Shouldn’t you be inside doing important princess stuff?”



The princess’s eyes saddened and as she turned away from Derpy. “To be perfectly honest with you, it’s not everyday I get to visit my subjects. So finding a pony like yourself sitting out here in the garden, it’s... unusual," she turned back to face Derpy. "It takes a rather special pony to want to be out here in the pouring rain. So what has brought you all the way out here today, Derpy?” she asked, gazing into the mare’s bright yellow eyes.



Derpy started at the ground, her eyes darting back and forth. “Well...I...I just felt like I needed to be alone.” her head drooped.



“Now why would somepony as warm and caring as you, ever feel the need to be alone? Besides, don’t you have lots of wonderful friends back in Ponyville who all love you and support you?”



“Yes, your majesty. But I don’t feel like anypony appreciates me.”



Princess Celestia rested her hoof beneath the mare’s chin, before bringing Derpy’s gaze to meet her own. “Derpy, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me and my subjects over the years. If it weren’t for you, ponies wouldn’t receive their mail. Nor would they have a special mare like you to call their friend. You may not think that you’re important, but you are.”



Derpy’s eyes welled up with tears. “So how will I be remembered then?”



The princess smiled at her and said, “History has a funny way of showing us that sometimes, even the littlest pony can make the biggest difference without even realizing it.”



Wiping away her tears, Derpy beamed up at Princess Celestia. “So do you think I’ll have a statue of me carved out of stone someday?”



A light chuckle came from the princess. “We’ll have to wait and see now, won’t we?”



Derpy drooped her head. “I suppose so.”



“Now, come inside. I don’t want you catching a cold.”



“Okay…” She jumped off the statue platform and onto the cobblestone path. “Princess Celestia?” Derpy asked.



“Yes?” she replied.



She walked alongside the princess now. “What do I have to do to be remembered?”



“Hmm...I think you’ll have to figure that out for yourself.”



Derpy thought about the princess’s response. Maybe she just needed to keep being Ponyville’s trusted mailmare and let the rest work itself out. “Okay...but maybe one day somepony will find a statue of me and wonder what I did that was so important that there is a statue of me.”



“Maybe…” Princess Celestia smiled at the mare’s blissful innocence. If only she knew…



If only…

The End

Author's Note:

Thanks for reading. Much appreciated. It definitely feels good to be back.

Honestly, this story hits rather close to home. I wanted to write a more personal piece, so while a lot of the time I do feel like my hard work does go unappreciated, I think that's also something many of you can relate to.

I hope you enjoyed it. Let me know your thoughts. :twilightsmile:

~ A

Comments ( 21 )

A good little story! :twilightsmile:

Don't think it needs the Sad tag. Also ends on a note that seems to be missing something in the subtle suggestions.

Otherwise, this was an enjoyable short read.

7476213
Thank you, that's all I wanted it to be. :twilightsheepish:

7476217
Well, sometimes, stories can surprise you. I should really add that author's note though...:raritywink:

7476230
Thank you, your feedback is both noted and appreciated. :pinkiesmile:

7476238
Well, I'm certainly glad you enjoyed it. :raritywink:

7476234
I think what seemed off has something to do with having no idea what Sunbutt's hinting at. Perhaps lost in translation or it was done too subtly.

A cute little story, I loved it. I always liked the idea of Celestia knowing all of her subjects, it's nice to see her portrayed as a more motherly figure in this. Though I can only imagine what that "If only" sentence means. :raritystarry:

First thing, gorgeous story! Real feelings, real emotions, cast through the stained glass of a pony searching her soul for meaning. Worth a thumbs up, for sure, and I may even follow you (in a totally not-stalker-way). :twilightsmile:

You asked for thoughts and help on the "Authors helping authors" chat, however, so rather than just read I typo-hunted too. There are a few, but not too many and certainly none detract from the story.

above, no one bit of sunshine

Change "no" to "not"

delivered ponies mail.

Add apostrophe at the end of "ponies"

felt...unappreciated

Add space after ellipsis

got their bill’s a day late

Remove apostrophe from "bill's"

from the floor up to the

Change "floor" to "ground"

P-princess Celestia?

Capitalize the "p" after the hyphen

your majesty

This is a title of a specific target, needs to be capitalized (multiple places)

it’s...unusual

Add space after ellipsis (multiple places, the only time you don't put a space after them, is when it butts against an end-quote)

unusual,’ she turned back to face Derpy. ‘It takes

Change single quotes to double quotes

like you to call your friend.

Change "your" to "their"

her and said “History

Add comma after "said"

to wait and see, now won’t

Move comma from before, to after "now"
****
Please don't take these fixes as being harsh, I wouldn't have done this if I didn't completely enjoy this.

7476470
Thank you very much, your thoughts are appreciated it. The 'if only' thing was more or less a way of leaving it up to the reader's imagination.
7476482
Thanks for pointing those out. I did not have this one edited and while I don't expect my readers to take up that role, I do appreciate those who can spot any little mistakes. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Your feedback is much appreciated. :pinkiesmile:

You have kicked my nest of feels but then left me with to many questions I am very confused!

Ignorance is kind

I think the clue to finding the answer to 'If only...' would be to identify the statue Derpy was sitting under. Celestia's familiarity with Derpy, despite her being one of X amount of ponies in Equestria she does not have daily contact with, seems to indicate she knows Derpy as well as she knows Twilight Sparkle.
Or I'm reading more into this than I should.
What do think Smarty Pants?

What was that quote? Oh, right.

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
-Martin Luther King, Jr.

I think that's fitting enough here. Good story all around, though I can't say I understood just who that statue was depicting.

7476634
I am sorry to hear you are confused. But I'm glad it had the effect it was supposed to. :raritywink:

7476723
Thanks for the quote and to be honest, I'm not really sure either. :twilightoops:
7476680
No I think even being able to read more deeply into a piece of writing is a sign that maybe, the reason those words were chosen was to leave the reader to imagine and interpret their meaning for themselves.

this was pretty good. that ending has me curious though.

The question of "will I be remembered?" is one that all mortal creatures must face at some point or another, and feeling under-appreciated is one of the more disheartening things that we can experience in our daily lives. Trying to deal with both of these things at once would be hard for anypony!

I really liked the atmosphere you set up from the very beginning -- the rain, the color of everything, the holes in the umbrella -- and the whole story really just felt melancholy and sad, something that worked very well for the subject matter. You said that this was more of a personal story, so I won't bother with the question of why you chose these two characters to fill the roles that they did; undoubtedly you have your reasons, and that's good enough for me. :3

The ending was a little vague, but not in a way that detracted from the story; I certainly didn't have any problems filling in the gaps left by Celestia's "if only" thought and, as a creative choice, it makes the reader think about Celestia's regrets and/or private inner thoughts as well. I know that someone quoted Martin Luther King, Jr. in the comments before mine, but if there was a quote that I feel sums up my feelings after reading this, it is this:

“The loneliest people are the kindest. The saddest people smile the brightest. The most damaged people are the wisest. All because they do not wish to see anyone else suffer the way they do.”

I certainly think that applies to Celestia's last thoughts, at least.

And, as someone who also works a very small, unimportant job, I can easily identify with Derpy. In fact, I've wondered the same things before. The rain has a way of bringing that out, even if we enjoy the days spent indoors peering out into the storm or sitting beneath an umbrella, and I think you did a great job of bottling that emotion up into one short, melancholy little story.

I don't like to critique in my comments (I prefer to leave encouragement and good stuff) but if you'd like me to do so (or even if you just want to talk about writing and whatnot) then I'll be happy to PM you.

Well done, and I look forward to seeing more from you.
~D4ft

Bonny work. :twilightsmile: A nice wee piece about Derpy seeking acceptance and recognition, and running into the mare best placed to assure her. A Celestia who takes the time for her little ponies and does her personal best for them, even the seemingly-least among them, is always a joy to read. Intriguing last line as well - I'll chalk that one to Celestia's prescience, and her anticipating what Derpy'll yet accomplish.

" If only..."
-Given the fact the statue is an alicorn, my Canon is that it is "If only Luna had had your patience with a lack of current recognition."

Also, I don't know one way or another how people feel about the movie but TVTropes.org (CAUTION: Use TVTropes Responsibly) has the following as one of the entries in The Movie's "Crowning Moments of Awesome" page:

Derpy/Muffins becoming a Heroic Bystander by shoving Twilight out of the way of Tempest Shadow's petrification grenade.

  • What makes it more awesome is that because Derpy took Twilight's place, everybody's favorite pony was responsible for saving Equestria by giving Twilight a chance to escape.
  • Even better—Rainbow Dash swooping in to grab Twilight a split-second before the grenade hits doesn't nullify the moment at all: The fact remains that Derpy distracted Tempest long enough to offer Twilight and Rainbow Dash an easy escape.
  • Bonus: Tempest seeing that moment of self-sacrifice first-hoof might have been what inspired her to do the same to protect the Mane 6 against the Storm King's own petrification grenade, making that three ways—initial shielding, buying time, and inspiring a repeat—that Derpy saved Equestria with that action.

So she might, just maybe, be getting a statue.

Nice story. A personal moment with Derpy. The older I get the more I wonder if anyone will remember me too. Though even statues fall eventually.

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