• Published 2nd Jan 2017
  • 618 Views, 26 Comments

Trump for King - Heat Signature



Donald Trump is transported to Equestria before he is made President. He still wants to be in charge, so now he is going to lead Equestria.

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Portals and Walls

Celestia awoke form her restless sleep. She dragged herself out of bed and slowly made her way to the balcony to begin the raising of the sun. The raising of the sun has always been a time of delight for her, even in her sisters absence, it gave her joy to bring warmth and shine to her citizens. This sunrise however, she dread, and could only hope it sets soon.

"Are thou ready dear sister?"

She sighed and turned to her co-ruler and younger sister "Yes Luna. Tell the servants I require assistance preparing for the event."

They both stood in silence for a moment. Neither one was happy with today's upcoming event, even though they knew it was inevitable for months.

"Are thou positive thou wishes to proceed with this, dear sister?" Luna asked "There must be an altern---"

"No." the Sun Goddess stated, cutting off her sister, "There is no other way. Our choices back then and our actions as of late have lead to this. Now, I must face this with my head high and hope my time as ruler meant something to my little ponies."

She retreated from the balcony with her head hung low, closing the balcony curtains behind her, and passed the equally saddened Lunar Goddess. She opened the door to her dressing room turning to Luna.

"Time to start the day...may it be over quickly."


1 Year Before

In a castle at the center of Ponyville, a young alicorn princess is preparing to test a new spell. Months of hard work and research had lead to this moment. If she made even one mistake, then the whole spell could be ruined. No distraction or bothers, this was too important. For this spell could be the key to unlocking universal secrets. She double checked to make sure she locked the door and shut all the windows. This was to important to take any chances. Taking a few deep breaths and checking the book one last time, the young princess was ready to test the spell. She readied her horn and aimed for the open spot on the floor.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"Twilight! Are you home?!" said a very excited and loud voice. Twilight groaned, having been interrupt from what may have been a ground braking achievement.

"Yes, Pinkie Pie. I'm here", she said, going to the front door to greet her friend.

`"Than open the door and let me in, silly filly." she said "I have got some super, duper news for ya."

Opening the door, Twilight was greeted by a bear-hug from her overjoyed friend.

"Oh my gosh, Twilight! You wont believe what happened at Sugar Cube Corner." She said, still squeezing Twilight in her embrace .

"If...I...could...breathe...I might" She struggled to say. Which Pinkie took as a sign to release her friend.

"What is it now Pinkie? I'm very busy."

"SoIWasDownAtSugarCubeCornerCauseThatsWhereIUsuallySpendMyTimeWhenIAmPlanningPartiesOrFillingOrdersButYouWillNeverGuessWhoCameByLookingForYouAndItWasSuperCrazyCauseIDidn'tExpectToSeeThemTodayItWasPrincessLunaAndSheWasLookingForYouAndIDidn'tKnowWhereYouWereSoIStartedTalkingToHerForHoursThinkingYouWouldAlsoWalkInSupresinglyButYouDidn'tSoSheSaidSheWasTiredAndWentToPonyvilleInAndSaidToTellYouToMeetHerThereLater!" Squeak

"Wha..."

"Princess Luna came by and said to tell you to meet her at Sugar Cube Corner Later. Weren't you listening?"

"Pinkie, why didn't you just bring her with you?" questioned to the lavender princess annoyed.

"Well I wanted to, but she was in a hurry for some reason, which is strange cause she always comes to Ponyville to relax" she emphasized her point, having her body go limp and slide like jell-O from a standing position to lying on her back.

"Thank you Pinkie, I will go see the Princess later, but for now I am busy. I'm trying to enhance this old spell I found in a book that was left on my doorstep a week ago."

"That hasn't worked well for us in the past." she said, more 'matter-of-fact"ly then in her bouncy persona

Twilight noted this, but just brushed it off as Pinkie being Pinkie.Spike, who entered the large empty room, was made write a note to remind her of the meeting she had later. Twilight turned to Pinkie and instructed her to remain behind the barricade of pillows Spike had set up earlier that morning. Twilight checked her book again nervously. She checked it again. One more time. She was ready, but was so nervous. Taking a step back, she steadied her breathing before selecting a spot on the floor where she would try summoning an object she had left on the other side of the castle earlier that day. Capturing a mental image of where she place it, and reassuring herself it was certainly there, she prepared to summon it.
Readying her horn, she winced as she dug deep, mustering all the magic she could to ensure this spell would work. It was more complex then any summoning spell she knew, and wanted to know why it required such effort.

Flash

The room was shrouded in purple smoke, but a black silhouette was seen in the place Twilight was aiming for

"Jeez, that hurt the old back. Whoever did this is so fired..."

Moments earlier in a different reality entirely

A man in a navy blue suit stands at a podium before a large crowd of onlookers, all wearing matching red caps. He clears his throat before speaking into the mics positioned toward him. His eyes brush over the crowd of smiling faces.
"We are gathered as one nation...nay as one people, to see our new leader take those first steps into the White House. After a long campaign, and so much social disorder, we can finally put that in the past as we come together and go into the future, not under a President, but under our elected King. Ladies and Gentlemen...it is my pleasure to introduce...military commander...rebuilder of the Social Divide...our new King...

An orange, blonde, navyblue suit man walks up onto the stage, he smiles at the crowd as he crosses the stage to the man at the podium, waving at the crowd the whole way.

...Donald J. Trump!"

An uproar of cheers and praise shock the earth. Trump shock the man's hand before taking one of the microphones off its little stand, turning to the crowd.

"Its time to make America great again!"

The crowd cheered louder. He smiled and waved as the crowd through roses at his feet.

Flash

The crowd hushed and stared at the spot their King had been standing in a second ago, now replaced by a light fog of purple. Security rushed the stage and other political figures joined, looking around the floor, hoping this was a performance of some kind.

The King was gone...but he was far from finishing his plans.

Author's Note:

So this is something I wanted to do.
A short story about Trump I wanted to have up a long time ago, but I guess its better to write this before the president is actually decided.
The site wouldn't let me post it for some reason before hand.


Before the comments get flooded with PC, SJWs, or Conservative triggering, I want to state that this story is meant to be humorous and not reflect any actual political views.
next few chapters will contain Trump quotes and impersonation, this doesn't reflect my support or opposition for him, so don't get pissed when you read an feel I am against him.

This is all for humor.

Hope you enjoyed the short beginning and will stick around to see where this goes. If you wanna help me, I could use a person that does a good Donald Trump or a good Pinkie Pie. A new cover photo would be great as well.

Comments ( 26 )

Being British, I have no idea how the Trump phenomenon started, and reading about his demeanor and campaign promises doesn't shed any light on the matter, either.

But I like the premise you've set, and barring a few grammar errors, I'll follow this story for now. :scootangel:

7835966
To be frank, (As an Hispanic-American myself) I'm not even sure how everyone here expected him to be President. Nor will I actually see him as President until he stops acting like his previous demeanor and starts being a leader.

7835985 Who was it who said "You'll never go broke appealing to the lowest common denominator?" Plato? Socrates? Lisa Simpson?

Whatever. All I know is, if reports are to believed, soon you'll have a wall to rival Hadrian's... and I'm not in the least bit jealous. :twistnerd: I mean, sometimes the Scots get on our nerves, but even we wouldn't classify them as all criminals and try to shut them out.

Okay, they can be a bit rowdy and frugal with their money, but THAT'S IT. Don't mention kilts... don't mention kilts :twilightblush:

7836003
Considering we as a country will go broke trying to build the wall by ourselves (No, Mexico will never fund the wall, despite what he said). I don't actually think it will ever become a reality simply due to the fact that a river (I'm not really good on geography so the name slips me) is too close to the Mexican border and the law specifically states the US cannot build an structure near a river. And thats not even counting the amount of problems that can go into building that. Besides, I would much rather have all that money go into something more believable than that.

It's not that I directly oppose it, it's just a waste of money to protect people from a nonexistent threat where people can simply come in by plane or boat. This is the modern era after all.

7835966 Being American let me try and explain the Trump phenomenon to you.

The trump phenomenon begins with the election of President Obama. While not the only factor at play a large part of the population viewed the election of a black man as the end of racism in America, when instead the tone of media became one of Obama overcoming endless discrimination in everything he did. Many on the right which criticized Obama's policies were met with accusations of being a secret racist.

The Obama administration is also blamed largely by the right for allowing ISIS to exist and become a multination organization. The right wing saw the leftist policies as conceding on everything all the time so as not to be seen as mean or insensitive. Obama administration's failings were seen as a result of political correctness. Obama was seen as going easy on the Islamic world and abandoning Israel to avoid offending Islam, for example. Obama avoids using the words terror and Islam in the same sentence.

So when the Republican primaries came up the right viewed many of the problem as a result of political correctness, both not letting them critic the administration and not allow us to identify our enemies. Nor were we allowed to talk about problems like illegal immigration because it might offend an illegal alien to be called illegal. So when Trump bombastically tossed political correctness to the side he gained a lot of instant support from the right. Because trump competed in the primary with a ridiculous number of other republican candidates he stood out and gain the momentum he needed to win the primary. His platforms are not that crazy for the Republicans (except for trade). He just did not state his policies like a politician. So the right initially resistant to the his approach came around and accepted his for his promises.

On the democratic side Clinton was chosen to be the nominee. The selection of Clinton was viewed as rigged among the democratic party, because despite the vote totals being close Clinton received about twice as many delegates as Sanders because of their parties super delegate system. This means Sanders needed to win ~70% of the vote to win the primary election.

By the time the election came around the the nation was numb to claims that trump was a racist or criticism for him not being politically correct. The left had been calling the right those names for the last 8 years. In fact not being politically correct was a good thing to the right which felt political correctness was a good thing. This means that Clintons attacks on Trumps character did very little to deter his base.

However, the democratic party mistrusted their own party because of the super delegates in the primary. So when Clinton scandals began pouring out of the woodworks, she was very vulnerable to attacks. Many moderates flipped to the trump side being numb to the narrative about Trump, but highly outraged about Clinton scandals. This highly fueled trumps anti-politician appeal.

To make the problems worse for Clinton, the media constantly stated that she could not loose. Clinton underestimated Trump because the far left was not immune to the crazy man rhetoric. Trump held about 8 times more rally than Clinton. All together this lead to a Trump win.

So in summary:
-Mistrust in existing political parties
-Backlash against political correctness
-8 years of repeating the same anti-right rhetoric made many immune to it.

I hope that answers you question.

7836098 also didnt help Clinton when she decided to insult 50% of the american public. calling a majority of Trump supporters as deplorable, which that is a fairly strong insult, was a huge nail in the coffin. they also had to figure out, thou they failed, how to assure the public that she wasnt simply a continuation of failed Bill Clinton and Barack Obama policies. she appeared as nothing more than a puppet that was easily manipulated and had no actual thought of her own. finally her and her parties out right hypocrisy during the entire election process. with Trump it was a "i dont care what you believe im going to tell you what i think and you are going to like it" vs Clinton "i am going to say one thing and act completely opposite to what i said" people are more adverse to hypocrites than flamboyancy

I kinda figured you weren't trying to place your political stance in this fanfic. :rainbowwild:

7836041 While I doubt Trump will do this, this is one way the wall can be built, and Mexico will pay for it all.

Legalize everything, then impose a 30% tariff on all narcotics.

A decent wall should only cost around 10 billion USD. The amount of income we'd make off the tariff would pay for the walls construction in just the first year alone.

Besides as long as drugs are illegal in the U.S. the wall will never work because there will be way to much profit incentive to get around it. If its cheaper for the cartels to move the drugs in legally they would pay a tax, rather then spending tens of millions of dollars on tunnels and submarines.

Also we can build next to rivers, that rule is for insurance reasons to keep from the government having to pay flood insurance :p I think we can make a wall water proof. Also Rio Grande isn't what it used to be, its barely even a stream in most places, and doesn't reach the ocean anymore. Due to the water shortages out west.

I'm looking forward to this!

7836283

Legalize everything

pulls out improvised explosive device with the nearest public schools name on it

WE WILL BUILD A WALL AROUND THE GRIFONS, AND MAKE EQUESTRIA GREAT AGAIN!

7836190 Flamboyancy 9.999999999 times /10 ends in hilarity.

7836337 Thanks for the reminder to watch my wording :p

I hope it was at least well implied that I didn't mean everything, everything. Meant victim less crimes and such.

7836348

this is also true

7836365 When I see an opportunity at something I find comical, I take it. Or build a wall around it. Either works.

This is quite a Surprise...(Not the political discussions/debate, that was expected before I even typed this story's up)...I honestly didn't expect the immediate attention, but am glad that so many people still find that humor can be a good way to approach issues.

I thank you for reading my half-assed story and hope you stick around.

Also, if anyone wants to help...I cant do a Pinkie Pie impression and would like some help writing her accurately.

7836098 Great read, and very incisive too. Cheers!

Who'd have thought bronies, e.g, you and others on this thread, would be so politically aware? That's the great thing about the fanbase... it never ceases to astound you. :twilightsmile:

7835985 To be frank (as an American who's mother's side came from Mexico) his election was neither a surprise nor unwelcome. Get out of the coastal cities and his support jumps. Even here in California, the ag areas where people actually have to work, it's not uncommon to see a MAGA hat on a field worker or to hear bakers tear apart the TPP. Good luck with finding coverage on that though.

7836003 Is that a shot at the working class?

7836876 Nah... just a bad attempt at humour. I apologise if you were offended. If there's one thing I don't want to get involved in a flame war over, it's politics. :twilightoops:

7836884 Not offended, it sounded like the opening to a joke about the media I heard.

7836906 I don't think the media needs any more jokes told about it, everyone sees how much they misjudged the mood of the nation (both in the US election, and Brexit). Let's see if this flow of right wing populism extends into 2017. Can't wait... :twistnerd:

7836342 You forgot to dig a moat around the ocean to keep the sirens at bay...

This can only end poorly. Sunbutt isn't decisive enough to banish him to the sun on contact.

7836915 Gonna have to disagree with you on that one. The media (in the U.S.) is unique in that it is quite possibly the only field that has zero accountability. Bakers, doctors, plumbers, lawyers, babysitters, accountants, ag workers, you name it. If you mess up at your job in America (maliciously or not), there's an oversight organization there to make sure you pay for it, and for everyone to know you paid for it.
Unless of course your career is in the media.

7836931 But she couldn't figure out how to get Luna a therapist before she went Nightmare Moon. Or how to be helpful. Or how to do anything but eat cake and be a troll. Besides she can't send Trump to the sun, he already built a wall no one can banish over around it.

7835966

He came to be a phenomenon because the media wouldn't shut up about him. If he as so much passed gas at a funeral, the media would blow it up "TRUMP SEVERELY DISRESPECTS ALL DECEASED FAMILY MEMBERS OF THE LIVING, TEABAG FARTING ON THEIR GRAVES!!!! HE IS LITERALLY HITLER!!!!"

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