• Published 1st Feb 2016
  • 381 Views, 56 Comments

My player two - DiamondBloomXP



Button mash and Sweeie bell are 15 years old and become ssp and 5 years later they are still together but something happens and changes there life for ever and nothing will ever be the same but it's a goo change.

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After the wedding

After the wedding me and sweetie go home she was beautiful and I wasn't going to lose her all though she was pretty now I prefer her the way she is her natural look was who I fell in love with sweetie got out of her dress and put away safely I did the same with my suet she rock her mane down as it fell down I blushed her eyes sparkled and her smile melted my heart .

" ugh my head hurt form All the things Apple bloom put in it "she starts taking out the clips I counted 56 she said the was 60 but I counted 56 " she started gilling randomly " hey buttons " I looked over at her " hm? Yes?" She looked at me " c-come here " I walked over to her she touch my hoof and placed it on to her belly I blushed he felt the foal kick gently " that amazing um and kinda gross " She giggle " oh buttons that what I love at you your so childish at times " she kept giggling and let my hoof go I wiped my hoof on my chest " hey! Is that bad?" She looked at me " I said that's what I love about you " she kissed my nose and smiled " come on let get to bed it 12 am and I'm really sleepy knowing the foal she won't let me sleep " " she?" I look at her as she climes in to bed " she he whatever the foal maybe it's better then calling the foal and it " I smiled " I guess your right " I look at her as we lay in bed " what you think we should name it " she yawed " I..." She didn't finished her sentence and fell asleep .

"Sweetie ?" She hugs my hoof and I look at her I blushes and runs my hoof through her mane "heh I fell like this has happened before just falling a sleep on me " I wraoed my hooves around her and she lat her head on my chest I stared at the wall and sighed " what if I'm jot ready for a foal...." I fell off to sleep .

I wake up to sweetie running off our off bed and then I hear her scream I sit up quick and run to her "WHATS WRONG WHAT WRONG ???" she looka at me her eyes filled with tear my heart sink so deep I fell it slam on the ground she holds her hoof around her belly " SWEETIE BELL TELL ME " she groand in pain I didn't like seeing her hurt and she won't tell me whats wrong .

"T-t-the foal ahhhhh! " I look at her confused " what about it ??" I ask why she talking about the foal it not here yet " ITS COMING!" I stepped back I felt dizzy I wasn't ready for this I can't be a father I'm too youge help!!!.

I shock me head and looked at her I held her hoof "you'll be fine come on " we walked out if the house and to the hospital she just lay there in bed the pain had slightly gone away she said I lay my ear to her belly listening to the foal heart I blushed slightly and smiles then I looked at her she smiles back weakly I kissed her for head gently .

Apple bloom came running followed by apple jack and rarity I stood up and glared over at rarity I didn't want her in here till I knew that the foal was safe and in sweeties arms not mine that just creep me out looking at a mini me and sweetie " what are you doing here rarity ?" She looked at me then looked down " I came to make sure my sister was ok I know after what I did you wouldn't want me around your foal but please..." I glared at her " leave...." Sweetie sat up and graded my hoof I looked at her "she can't do anything now..." My ears flattened " but ...?" She shock her head at me and I looked down and sighed .

"Well this ain't awkward " apple bloom said sweetie and apple jack giggled I looks at apple bloom she smiled and nuged me " come on smile you two are having a foal" my eyes widened " NO IM NOT SHE IS !!" everyone giggled I didn't find it funny "she didn't mean that she meant I'm having our foal " I look at her and blushes more" oh I see...".

After and hour some doctors come in and tell.us to leave the room we waited out side I walked up and down the hall way waiting raity puts her hoof on my shoulder I jump back " sorry darling I did mean to scare you " I stare at her " what do you want ?" .

" I think you should sit down she might be a while " I sigh and look down . "something wrong darling ? " I look at her then I look down " what if I'm not ready to be a father ?..." She put her hoof to her mouth " w-well I mean y-you could away give it away" I stand up and glare at her " I don't know why I thought for a second that I could talk to you " I turn to walk away then she puts her hoof on my shoulder " you are ready you saved Sweetie you are brave you got a job just to see her you did everything for her you married her just so she would be with you again you will make a good father to a filly or a coalt and I'm glad that you are the pony to look after my sister " I look at her and I smile a little.

Suddenly I hear sweetie bell scream my eyes widened and I go to walk in the room but apple jack grabs my tail I yelp and look at her " where us think ya going she is fine they ain't hurting her it just hurt to have a foal ok? " I sigh and nod " ok..." I sit down several minutes later I hear sweeties voice asking " what's wrong ?? BUTTON ! " .

I stand up look at rairty then at apple jack they all don't stop me I push the door open I look at sweetie " what wrong ???" She looked at me and pony pushes me back our the room " has she had the foal? " apple bloom ask I nod I hear rarity gasp then apple jack say to apple bloom " it ain't crying something wrong " apple bloom sighs " well she is early...." I begin to tear up and put my head in my hoovse it my fault I said I wasn't ready when I was I coused this .

Suddenly I hear a foal cry I stand up fast and wipe my eye the doctor let me in I run to sweetie bell I looked at her she has been crying but she had a big smile on her face looking down in to her arms I looked at her she looked at me I blushed .

"Your a father " I felt a felling in my heart it was a good felling it made it fell hole I looked at her "i-im a-a-a " she nodded and I fainted everything when black .

Author's Note:

This fanfic is update on Wattpad and if you want to read on as soon as a new chapter comes out cheek it out there my names is DiamondBloomXP or @natashamills3 thank you ! :twilightblush::scootangel::derpytongue2:

Comments ( 55 )

Judging from the description, you are desperately in need of an editor.

6893304 I'm going to have to agree. This seems like an interesting fanfic, but sorry dude, you grammar/spelling isn't that good.

Where's the infinite supply of beef Jenkins my man

Many people have trouble with grammar, nobody's perfect, so it stands to reason that, the story can be improved at a later date.
I got your back DiamondBloomXP, don't you worry about these naysayers.:ajsmug:

6893304

Don't be so mean! I, for one, look forward to the continuing adventures of Sweetie bell and lewge and the element of genorosety.

6894650
I mean, just because it can get better, doesn't mean it will. And us "naysayers" just want some quality programming on Fimfiction for once. Not that I myself am bringing it, of course.

6894762

It's those damn naysayer-naysayers that're bringing this place down. Why, back in my day, naysaying was a national past-time! Nowadays you can't naysay a twig without some uppity idiot naysaying your naysaying. It's awful.

6894762
You say that like you're perfect, or something, but you're not, nobody is, perfection is an ideal that only creates madness, chaos, and impracticality, try to think positive and maybe the grammar will get better. It's all a part of the writing process.

6894844
I agree, naysaying is for those who can't think positively about anything else, but themselves, or their creations.

6895038
When did I ever imply I was perfect? My stories are shit and I know they're shit.

You need an editor.

6895038
You need to bother for longer than half a minute and read what someone is saying. They aren't proclaiming that they are perfect, but that people can go around and expect a certain level of quality from stories on here. At the very end of his post, he intentionally self depreciates himself to show that he is far from a perfect being.

So get your white knighting head out of your ass and go back to tumblr.

6894844 I'm afraid I'm going to have to naysay your naysaying regarding the naysayers saying naysay to the other naysayers.

For you see, this is the nayception.

6894650

Justification for one's faults is no means a method tof down play performance. Rather, help should be found to improve strenghts, and counter weaknesses. The goal should always be self improvement.

An editing of this story now will do very little to change the current rating. It's like practicing after a game, thinking it will improve your past game's score. The damage has been dealt, now the best thing to do is to move on and address faults with assistance from those that know a thing or two more than you.

6895092
I see your point, I tip my hat to you for your wisdom.

6895080
One I don't have tumblr, two, depreciation of oneself leads to self destruction, and stress, I know it because sometimes I put myself down for a lot of things, and I also have discovered that it would only hinder my own development both emotionally, and mentally, three, I didn't mean perfect as in the perfect being, or anything, what I meant was perfect in terms of being on par with what everyone wants to see in writing. That's all, but you're right, I'm in need of an editor, but it seems that you've already filled that post and put me in my place, for that I thank you.

6895078
Don't say that about yourself, I would love to read your stories sometime. Also, just because you want something, doesn't guarantee that you'll get it immediately, just give it time.

6895130
Can I at least have an okay level of English comprehension? Is that too much to ask?

6895090

How darest thou naysay my naysaying of naysaying naysayers. I should have thee strung up in the gallows for this naysayery, thou cad.


6895050

You should agree with me. I am consistently right.

6895154
No it's not, you're right, I'll just be silent from now on.

6895168
I am no cad, I'm just trying to stop the fighting in the comment section, seeing as how fighting about this is solving nothing, but only creating more problems.

the story can be improved at a later date.

Too bad it's already published now, huh?

If I went out to a restaurant and was given bad food, I wouldn't be satisfied by someone telling me that the cook was bound to get better at some point down the road. If someone's a rotten cook, they shouldn't work in a restaurant. If someone lacks the most basic language skills that should have been learned by age 10 or so, that person shouldn't be posting their writing in a public forum for others to see. The cook is welcome to serve their slop to family, though, and the "writer" is welcome to email their attempts to friends. Doubtless they'll get lots of support.

Once it's public? People shouldn't expect praise if they don't deserve it.

i.imgur.com/d2HbA.jpg

6895247

I didn't call you a cad. God.

6895288 6895247 No no, Mesa was clearly calling you a cad.

I suggest thou defend thy honor post haste.

The good thing about this fic is the title reminds me of a particularly brilliant episode of Steven Universe.

As for everything else... Well, let's just say the synopsis alone is the typing equivalent of someone trying to speak with a mouthful of cornflakes. So, I won't bother with the rest now.

6895123

You might need an editor, but my comment about requiring an editor was for the author of this so called story. Everything in that comment below you name was addressed solely to you.

Out of curiosity then, while the subject is on my mind, do you have aspergers or something similar? Because you are misunderstanding all sorts of social and communication ques all over this comment section. Thinking people are addressing you when they aren't, misunderstanding posts, etc.

6895457
Now that you mention it, yes I do have a form of aspergers, but most of the time it doesn't hinder me, but I owe you an apology for my despicable behavior towards your comments and who they're directed at.

6895344

*thou defend'st thine honor

If you're gonna slander my good name, at least do it right.

6895665

If you're gonna slander my good name, at least do it right.

Neva. Jk, Mesa. And look! I learned something new today :]

6895050 >says the dude with the alicorn OC avatar; this comment brought to you by a bitch who also has an alicorn OC or three

6898355
What significance is my O.C. to you, just leave me alone, and I'll leave you alone, does that sound fair to you?

6898415 An alicorn OC, even a parody one, is instant red flag territory around these parts. I should know; I got flak for my alicorn.

6898420
If they insult me, I'll just ignore them, then their insults are just empty, useless words. So they can think what they want and I don't give a damn.

6898426 Who is this "they" you speak of? I'm afraid I don't follow.

6898430 When I say "they" I mean any one who has an ignorant opinion of my O.C. choice, in case you're wondering.

6898438 How about this: write a story with your OC, and do better than I did with mine? Maybe, when I read that fic, my opinion could change then.

6898441
Your opinion is your own, I can't change that, but I won't let you try to belittle me for my choices.
Also you should write just for the sake of writing, not just for what other people may think. Beethoven didn't give a single damn if you didn't like his music or not, he wrote it because it was his passion.

6898554 True; I am, however, merely offering you a challenge. I've seen your first fic, and its ratings; surely you could do better than I?

You have the potential.

6898576
I thank you for your encouragement, but I'm taking things one step at a time, and you should have some faith in yourself and I could use an editor for my stories, if you're interested, just send me an email, and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

Well, I think I know the reason for the dislikes: grammer. I'm afraid we couldn't judge you on anything else, proper capitalization and punctuation placement is thrown out the window, and... Ah..... Other than general spelling errors, those are the only 3 problems. The solution: get an editor! Editors are those who help others with grammer issues, big or small. I would gladly sign up for the job, it's just I'm on my phone. Like, that's the only time I'm able to be on the site. But, get an editor and I'm sure your writing will clear up!

6898832 thanks thats is one of my weak spots :ajsleepy: because i have dyslexia i will go tough this and fix the problems sorry

6893802 can people just stop pointing that out i cant help it i try my best to get around my dyslexia

6894762 i try my hardiest ok ? im just going go cry i cant do nothing right...

Comment posted by DiamondBloomXP deleted Feb 5th, 2016

6900415 oh, Dyslexia? In that case, an editor is really needed. I'm sure your fine with writing, but if you can't see a problem then it shouldn't be your fault. Just add in the story description "need editor", or make a blog about it.
Best of luck,
ButtonMash.

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