Could still use a bit more detail, but a noticeable improvement. Remember, there's no such thing as too much detail with erotic scenes. Other that just humping, what were they doing? Where were their hooves/claws, eyes, or lips? What were they saying or thinking? Surely they adjusted position slightly at some point, even if it's only scooting up a bit, or sinking further into the water. What makes these scenes is the detail. Be as descriptive as possible.

If this is just a pure sex fic, then you're doing great so far.

Having sex in water actually washes away a girl's natural lubrication, so it will actually end up being quite uncomfortable unless you use some sort of non-water-soluble lube.

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Yes, I did know this. If the story was pure reality, then it wouldn't exsist.

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It is indeed a pure clop story, I don't really have plans other then for them to have sex.

...Okay, this story is pure clop, true, but if you're pushing them to be romancing each-other too then...Well the picnic was a good idea. I do like the idea of them actually going on dates rather than the two of them just bumping uglies for no reason. So points for that. I'd still like a little back story on how they started to develop feelings for each-other outside of 'they started seeing each-other more often and they suddenly liked each-other'. Was there an event? Was it just the little things they started to notice? Did they catch sexy glimpses of each-other?

And I...Well I think AJ and Twi are taking this really well, considering. Was Twilight not a little angry that they did it in her bed? Or did Spike wash the sheets before she came home...assuming she wasn't already home. (Well with the way Twi reads books, it's possible)

Ah well, it's still fun and surprisingly cute giving the context. I'm not much for clop unless there's a story behind it, but because it's Spikebloom Imma ive it a pass.

Edit:

So far, the dates have involved having sex in Apple Bloom’s bed, having sex in Twilight’s bed, having sex in the clubhouse, and having sex in the Apple Orchard. This time, they decided that the next would be Neigh Falls,

Don't know how I missed that hilarious line! It makes it sound like they're on a crusade to have sex everywhere they possible can! Next week, find out if they managed to bang in Celestia's Bathroom!

They are determined to do it everywhere.

agen that was amazing

*stabs*pervert

plz continue!