6792104

Dude, this made my head hurt. Not to be rude, but your constant switching between 2nd person and 3rd person, plus the uses of past present and future tenses were very unorthodox. Its good for a read, and ill continue, but get someone to proof read and edit please. It'll do your story wonders

Ouch. Your comment would make the most lenient of Grammar Nazis want to hang themselves. If you're going to leave a comment criticizing someone else's syntax, you should at least learn how to punctuate your own comments first. xD

6793471 This coming from someone that has 0 stories on their profile... I understand that you are giving advice, but don't tell me how to write if you don't write yourself.

6796926 While this may be true, he may have written stories outside FimFiction? I'm not trying to come off as rude, but golly, you sure did.

Me however, am just like you. No life, and writing fics. Pals?

6792741 I've already got the noose! Wanna do it together?

Nothing to quote.

Editors note: I see you write your clop like I write mine. Short and quick, eh? Heheh.

6800088 *drinks a bottle of Jack Daniels* Let's do this!

6801558 I hear bungee jumping off of a bridge with a rope around your neck is a good way. It's also pretty fun too.

6796926
That may be true but that doesn't make their argument any less valid. While in this case it may be easier to point fingers and cry out, "look at this untalented critic", you still need to look past your initial, and completely natural, defensiveness of your work and learn make peace with your mistakes and improve as a content creator.