2: Cheesy Epilogue
Pinkie Pie awoke, her mind instantly springing to life as if somepony had just pressed an on/off button. She shot her head up and blinked a few times. She was lying in a hospital bed. Her muscles were all sore, but the pain was mostly gone now. She closed her eyes and looked inside for the trace of her fighter persona. It lay there, dormant, awaiting a call from her, ready to fight when it was necessary. Pinkie Pie smiled, as she realized the multiple possibilities of being able to turn pegasus or earth pony on the spot. Think of all the pranks she could pull! And, what was way more important, one of her biggest dream – to be able to fly in the sky alongside her bestest friend and a secret crush – could now become a reality. She giggled and soon burst out laughing as joy overwhelmed her.
The door to the hospital room opened as all of her friends burst inside.
“Are you OK, Pinkie?” Though everypony asked their concerns in different words, it was apparent that was the meaning behind each question.
“I'm fine,” she replied. “Just a teensy-winsy bit sore.” A smile graced her face. It was one of her distinctive magical smiles that always succeeded in bringing warmth in the heart of everypony they were directed at. “How long was I out?” she asked, rubbing her chin with a hoof.
“Well, you took your time,” teased Rainbow Dash, nudging Pinkie's elbow with her own. “You were sleeping for the whole night and day.”
The rest of her closest friends moved away, unclogging the door and letting princess Celestia pass. Pinkie noticed that the princess managed to regain her usual majestic posture, her multicolor mane flowing freely with the solar wind.
“How are you feeling, my little pony?” she asked with a sincere concern.
“I'm fine, princess,” replied Pinkie with the same smile.
“Is now a good moment to inquire about your incredible fighting skills?” another question followed.
“Yeah, Pinks, you were just SO AWESOME!” interjected Rainbow Dash with an audible squee. “Where did you learn to kick flanks like that?”
Pinkie blinked for a moment then beamed, lightening the room with her joy. “I have no idea!” she exclaimed, still smiling. It was the absolute truth. “It was a surprise for me too, you know.”
Pinkie hopped out of the bed, massaging her limbs and shoulders. She was not going to spend another minute in a hospital bed.
“Are you sure you feel well enough to walk?” asked Fluttershy in a barely audible whisper, her usual tone of voice.
“I told you, I'm fine,” insisted Pinkie. The other ponies exchanged glances and shared a nod.
“Then come with us to the Sugarcube Corner,” proposed Twilight. “You must be hungry after all that exertion.”
“You bet I am!” exclaimed Pinkie, loud rumbling in her stomach confirming her words. “Let's go!” She hopped out of the room towards the bakery. All of her friends and the princess followed.
***
Pinkie led the group to the Sugarcube Corner, hopping and bouncing her usual way. She was curious why the street seemed so empty tough it was only an early evening. She asked Twilight about it, but the unicorn only said something about ponies still returning from the woods after they had fled for their life earlier.
They finally reached the bakery which Pinkie Pie promptly entered. It was dark inside but only for the briefest of moments.
“SURPRISE!” the deafening shout erupted inside the building, lights bursting suddenly, confetti exploding everywhere as dozens of ponies jumped out from their hiding places. Pinkie Pie looked amazed at the impromptu party they had all managed to prepare without her help.
SURPRISE PINKIE PIE was written on a banner hanging overhead. To its right was a portrait of a familiar pink face with an enormous smile. To its left was the same face, but the coat was white and the mane gold.
Pinkie's eyes tingled for a moment, but before any tear of happiness could escape them, her mood shifted rapidly (typical Pinkie Pie style) as she took to governing the party.
“Come on, everypony!” she shouted, thrusting a hoof in the air. “Let's PARTEH!”
Vinyl Scratch started her magical music device and soon the party was in full swing.
***
The evening slowly turned to night. Luna's moon was gracing the beautiful sky with its luminous presence. The town was unusually quiet, except for the Sugracube Corner which was bouncing about in unison with music managed by Vinyl Scratch. Pinkie sneaked outside, wanting a little fresh air.
“What's wrong, Pinks?” a familiar voice asked behind her. “It's not like you to skip the party.” Rainbow Dash passed her a glass of punch.
“Nothing's wrong, silly Dashie,” the contagious smile bloomed on the earth pony's face. “I just wanted to get a little fresh air. I still feel a little sore, you know.”
Rainbow Dash kicked her hoof on the ground, clearly wanting to say something but having trouble finding the words. The pink mare waited patiently.
“Pinkie...” the pegasus finally began. “What you did back there... It was just so awesome I don't even know what to say.”
“Well then, don't say it.” Pinkie's smile never left her face. Rainbow Dash looked taken aback for a brief moment, but burst out laughing soon afterward.
“I just wanted to say thanks, you know,” continued the pegasus after she had gotten her voice back. “For saving us all. I felt so helpless back then. Being the Element of Loyalty can be very hard when there's nothing you can do to save your friends.” She looked sheepishly at Pinkie.
“Aw, don't sweat it. I will always be there for all of us.” The pink pony beamed. “And, you know what's even more super-duper great about it?”
“Shoot.”
“I have always been jealous of how you pegasi could fly through the sky. Ever since I saw your Rainboom back on the rock farm. Of course I didn't know it was you back then, but after I met you in Ponyville, and after we teamed up as the official pranksters, I have always been so super envious of you. Of your freedom, of you not being bound to earth, of the amazing speed you could reach high above.” Pinkie paused for a while, her smile, though still present on her face, looked sadder for a moment. “But now I don't have to be jealous anymore. Nuh-uh, I can finally chase after you,” she proclaimed. Rainbow Dash missed the true meaning of her words, instead concentrating on some other message they carried.
“So wait...” she said, her eyes blank with confusion. “You mean you can do that again?”
“Anytime I want. She's still there, you know.” To confirm her words, Pinkie closed her eyes and concentrated. She reached deep inside her, extending an imaginary hoof towards the dormant part of her mind, towards the source of all her incredible strength. She snapped her red eyes open, the golden aura blazing around her body, her mane gold, and her coat white as snow on the first day of winter.
Rainbow Dash's jaw almost hit the bottom of the steps they were sitting on. “Wait... You said 'she'. Is this not you, Pinkie?”
“Of course it's me, silly Dashie.” The smile on her white snout was the exact same as the smile on her pink one. “She just provides the strength. And the wings.” She flapped them as if to confirm.
“So, um...” Rainbow Dash looked slightly confused. “What do you call her?”
“Huh...” Pinkie gasped, surprised. She hadn't thought of that. But right then an image of the party banner flashed in her mind. On the right, there was her pink snout with PINKIE PIE written next to it. On the left, there was her white snout with... The name engraved itself with golden letters in her heart.
“I've got just the right name.” She leaned towards her friend and whispered the name into her ear.
“Good one. I like it,” replied Rainbow. “It really suits her... you. And fits nicely, considering everything that happened today.”
“So what do you say, Dashie?” Pinkie looked straight into the cyan pegasus's magenta eyes, her own red orbs seeming to extend from their sockets. “Will you teach me the Sonic Rainboom?”
“Ha, you think you can keep up with me?” teased Rainbow Dash.
“I know I can,” replied the white pegasus confidently. She raised her hoof, which Rainbow Dash instantly bumped with her own.
The two mares started towards the clear night sky, illuminated by Luna's dearest moon and countless stars. Soon after, two booms were heard, one right after another. Two circles of light brightened the dark sky. One was prismatic with a colorful rainbow extending from the middle. The other was bright pink, giving birth to what looked like a golden streamer dragged across the sky.
THE END
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Flanagan · 3.2k words · 112 10 · 4.7k views
- PresentPerfect · 12k words · 83 4 · 4.5k views
- Commodore64 · 12k words · 52 6 · 1.9k views
- Tom2rules · 13k words · 132 7 · 7.9k views
- M11-Megas · 21k words · 53 6 · 2.8k views
- Foetohn · 30k words · 62 3 · 4.4k views
- Damocles23 · 29k words · 59 5 · 2.4k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.196 seconds
Total duration
918 users online
1,988,391 hits today, 2,073,628 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Hot blooded Pinkie and Surprise thumbnail? I like.
This...This is full of win!
Epic!
you sir get 1 internet point
What the
This was LEGENDARY! 
and RainbowPie over it! 
This fic is more than epic!
Well that was weird and I doubt I'll ever read it again but that was quite a fun and enjoyable ride. Nice work.
EPIC WIN
Good, extremely good
EXTREMELY COOL
OH GOD!!
544168>>544245>>544460>>544727>>544910>>545064>>545169>>545210>>546340
So many Dragon Ball fans amongst us Bronies. 
Thank you all. I'm glad you liked it.
545064
) gathered from the energy of all people on earth. I have never played EarthBound before (it was the game you were refering to, right?). But anyway, the whole concept is very popular in many animes/mangas/games. 
Friendship is magic (and STRENGTH!), after all. 
It was (subconsciously) based on the eipc fight between Goku and Kid Buu, when the former used the Genki Dama (Spirit Bomb in English? Poetic...
544910
Who knows, maybe the whole concept of SurprisedRainbowPie could be developed further. 
Yeah, I sorta couldn't resist adding a little shipping at the end... Besides, I left an opening for myself there.
546802
I hope it is!
546802
Actually, I'm not a fan of Dragon Ball Z, i just like the story a LOT.
547731
I was wondering if anyone not being a fan of DBZ would have some kicks out of this story. I'm glad you did. 
That's a great thing to hear.
548455
Besides maybe they were just too shocked or frightened to question Celestia about it. Or got used to it after fighting Nightmare Moon (and knew that Scorching Sun was as much Celestia as Nightmare Moon was Luna). 
And, above all else, Celestia's still a princess. If you demanded her to cry in shame you would get sent to the moon. 
You could be right on that one. It kinda lacks consequences...
But we all know how forgiving those ponies can be.
Would you mind telling what kind of errors (pointing them out straight to my face would be great, but I wouldn't dream of forcing you to read through the whole thing again
)? I revised the story myself and am surprised you only found a few errors (and not much, much more 
). You see, I'm not a native English speaker, so I may commit some blunders and not even realize it. 
548515
It wasn't really the pony's reactions that didn't feel normal (they were worried about Pinkie and knew that Celestia had returned to normal after the blast so it made sense that they rushed to their friend instead of the princess). It was more Celestia's dialog that seemed awkward in comparison due to the fact that she rarely mentions herself at all, purely choosing to focus the conversation on Pinkie. She acts as though she was a completely different entity then Scorching Sun even though they share the same body. Maybe a line where she apologizes for not realizing the Elements would overtake her so soon (or whatever you want her to apologize for) would give Celestia a bit more character in this story. Of course these are just suggestions and I thumbed up your story regardless.
-“Listen to u, Twilight Sparkle." I assume you meant "Listen to me, Twilight Sparkle."
-"despite your speed in gathering other Element Bearers,". Since there's only 5 other ones it might in gathering the other Element Beareres".....then again I could be nit picking.
-"My sister have also succumbed to the dark side of the power of the Elements.” My sister is singular so it should be, "My sister has also..."
-"cannot keep a straight face even at a funeral." should be a comma after face.....again, nit-picking.
-" to beat Discord. But then there " instead of a period you can put a comma to join the two short sentences
Sorry I don't have enough time to edit any more. After skimming through the first bit, you may want to recheck where you place commas and periods. Although there aren't any major mistakes, it could also flow a lot better. Talk to your editors about it because they probably know best. I'm off to a three hour drive to who knows where
. Again, its a great story regardless and the few hindrances in flow are probably due to English not being your native language, so don't worry about it. 
549495
Maybe a reverse scene with Luna?
Thank you so much for taking your time to check it over again.
Your suggestion to add just a little apology for Celestia is quite a valid one, I'm afraid. Let me see what I can do about it.
A sample of how a talk with my editor looks like:
I hear there are suitable groups to look for the blessed souls here on FimFiction. 
Me (the editor): Bad Karach. You used the wrong tense again! Correct it, PRONTO! * Iron Will's voice *
Me (the writer): OK... *Fluttershy's squeal, runs to hide under the desk *
Yeah, I probably should look for the editor/proof-reader not being myself...
Yeah, those commas. I HATE YOU, COMMAS!
static.fjcdn.com/comments/That+is+a+fine+comma+you+got+there.+Have+mine+_703ca1e063ed165eec8b4da9249a7cbb.jpg
Wait. What does "handed" mean? Is that like hoofed, only for different creatures? Or maybe it's a term from Lyra's "human" stories. Whatevs.
551506
Changed to a neutral 'pass'.
Oh my Celestia, you're so right.
I'm amazed at how vigilant and thorough some readers are. You're eyes are better than Rarity's.
A related story:
"Lyra, can you HAND me a glass of water?" asked Bon Bon.
"Sure thing, candy ass," chuckled the unicorn preparing her magic. "LET THERE BE HANDS!"
th02.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2012/075/2/4/shining_finger_by_hawtwingz-d4sy8pl.jpg
551581 Epic pic FTW!
551712
Hell, yeah! Just for the record, here is its source: Shining Finger, so that nopony thinks I'm its author.
Well, InnovationST ( 549495 ) has been very right about the story needing at least a little explanation and apologies from Celestia. A small update has been made to fix it.
Besides this, countless spell and comma errors have been fixed (but I'm sure there are a lot more left
).
Just a small note for anypony who will maybe read the story in the future.
678644
Thank you kindly.
THIS HAS SO MUCH WIN IN IT THAT I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO REACT TO IT!!!
748079
You current reaction seems plausible...
On a more serious note, though, I'm glad you enjoyed it.
and that's why pinkie is best pony
1063912
Exactly!
1141884
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
A curious thing, I remember asking for a review of this very story on ponychan's fic board. The reviewer actually said it was way too boring and should be much shorter. I, of course, appreciated his time in reviewing my humble story, but decided against a rewrite. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Pinkie_Pie_lolface.png I wouldn't have a heart.
But I try to remember his remarks when writing new stories, so his time wasn't entirely wasted; far from it! 
Anyway, that's why, my good sir, I'm pleasantly surprised that you found the story suspenseful.
You are like nicotine hard to get off of.
I don't smoke I'm too young and I think it's gross but you get it
1153100
It IS gross and it's a f*cking waste of money. 
You should be proud you don't smoke. I hope you never start.
1154073 I totally am
my grandfather smokes and it stinks and it chokes me and makes me feel bad (like sick like lung problems).
I give this 4/5 stars. You woulda gotten a full 5, but you lost half a point for calling wings "flight organs", and you used the term twice.
Really though, that was a fun little story.
1389137
I honestly don't know how to call those instead of simply wings. 
IT shall be corrected if you supply an alternative.
EDIT: Oh, and thanks.
1391183
man, just stick with wings! Diversifying your vocabulary is a great goal and all, and can certainly spice up a story, but when the effort to do so results in "flight organs", well...
if you really need a different term, then I suppose "flight appendages" would be a vast improvement.
1391276
Done, thanks. Actually it did bother me back then, when I wrote this short story, so thanks.
1394189
Glad to have been of service!
I just had to reread this story again, because it's still so much of legendary win!
If I only could draw , I would have made a pic of Surprise using Kamehameha against the Solar Flare! But well, with my current drawing skills, even the background would be a huge challenge.
1407585
Well, it's certainly a good thing to hear someone liked it so much to take the time to reread it.
In my wildest dreams I wouldn't have anticipated it.
Yeah, no worries, I can't draw either.
Although, if there was one thing I could hand-draw back at high school (out of during-class boredom 
) were the Kamehamehas. But the people/ponies performing them are an entirely different matter. 
1407616
I saw your story in my featured stories section and I thought ''Hey, that was a awesome story, let's read it again!'' .... And that's how I ended here!
Children: Ooohhhhh
Random comment ended!
*****
Well then, your more than a wild dream came true!
Yeah, drawing people and ponies is difficult and the background takes a lot of time too!
indubitably that was cheesy still good though
I demand another.....hell I demand a whole series
Eggman:and I demand butter..I love butter
Super sayian pinkie. Awesome. This story is officially Corset approved!
5569087
Thank you, though it would certainly stand a solid dose of editing (a complete rewrite probably). God, how old and rushed it is.
5570679 also your story is now in the group I founded Heroes and Antiheroes of Equestria.
5571639
Than I owe you one for considering it worthy of adding to your group.
6086757
I couldn't agree more.
This story needs a rewrite so bad, though...
This story has 88 likes and 0 dislikes...and I'm a huge DBZ/DBS fan...and the cover art is cool...definitely gonna give it a read soon
6586390
), but... This story is also older than Old Kai himself and could stand a 
So peruse at your own risk. 
Not to discourage you (much
few polishing touchescomplete rewrite.6587097
ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I've just finished reading it, and I think it was pure awesomeness!!! This needs no rewrites! It was amazing, just amazing! I loved it so much! It felt completely like DBZ, and everything, from characters to events, felt like anime (Or maybe it was just me who preferred to imagine the events in anime-style
). The only thing I hated was the shipping (RainbowPie) because it was unnecessary, but that wasn't important at all and it was stated only in one line, so it's nothing for me.
The fight was simply EPIC! I could imagine all the events of the fight as if I was actually watching a DBZ episode! Even though, I think the fight could've been better, but I know why: If you had written this story after watching Twilight's Kingdom, you probably would've inspired a thing or two and made this story the best action thing on this site, but this story is about 3 years old, so I understand, and I won't criticize that. The characters were all right in place and their reactions were in-character. Well done with writing Twilight, too. And very well done for creating something awesome out of Surprise! And finally, well done for doing something new with the Elements of Harmony, and not forgetting them like most of the writers do.
Over all, I give this story 9.8/10. Amazing job, my friend! Pure anime-style awesomeness! And I'm eager to read anything DBZ related or containing DBZ fights from you! I really hope you write more stories like this one
One more thing, would you allow me to promote this story in one of my blog posts? I won't do it without your permission.
6588958
Thank you very much for your kind words, I'm glad you found the story to your liking.
), then be my guest. I would be honoured and in your debt. 
Wow, quite honestly I'm very humbled by your response.
If you find the story worthy enough to promote anywhere (I would never dream of it, I'm my own worst critic, I guess
P.S. Yeah, the ship is totally unnecessary, I can't agree more.