• Member Since 25th Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen Jul 3rd, 2017


Just a simple guy wanting to make his own way in the world i suppose. Been trying to will myself to finally get to work on making a decent story so wish me the best of luck

Comments ( 13 )

Well, I can safely say I like it. It's pretty interesting so far, I like Shamrocks character.
Once again the Grand Pegasus Enclave are assholes.
hmmmm a great story from my point of view at least.:twilightsmile:

I like it so far! Can hardly wait for the future chapters you are creating!

Thank you for the support, really glad to see my story wasn't a complete bust. :pinkiehappy:
I'll try my best to keep the chapters coming every week or so but with senior year of high school coming up it might be a bit difficult.

Comment posted by Tetragrammaton deleted Sep 2nd, 2014
Comment posted by Solowing51 deleted Sep 2nd, 2014

Excellent. That sums up my opinion of this chapter. The infamy of Cupcakes lives on, even after 200 years.

EEe! Nice chaptah! You should really do more big chaptas or do chapters more oftan! :rainbowwild:

5991723 Thank you! and I know they are fairly small and spaced out quite a bit! With my school year coming to an, end you can expect these upcoming chapters to be a bit more bulky and numerous

Well this is awkward! I didn't mean to post chapter 8! Here i thought I had just saved it! Minor fluke that shall be fixed! Expect the fully finished chapter to be done by Saturday! :twilightoops:

Is this a Ghost Rider/Fallout/My Little Pony crossover?

6656105 Just a Fallout crossover. I've actually never seen ghost rider so if there are any similarities , it is just a coincidence.

You do not waste any time getting right to the destruction of the hometown, huh? That suits me just fine, given how long some stories spend building up characters and a setting that will never be seen again. I did like what background you gave for this character's life; the exposition on the town is long enough to make me care about its destruction, but short enough as not to overstay its welcome.

One obvious quality that holds back the story is spelling errors. They break immersion and leave a bad impression on readers. It might be worth going back and doing revisions to fix those mistakes.

And perhaps, you might consider adding a short description of the protagonist's appearance within this opening chapter... point out gender, race, mane color, and coat color. Just four adjectives to help visualize this character better.

6750079 Ty for the critique! This was my first little story and i'm glad to get some advice on it! I admit i'm not the most literate person and it takes me a while to actually make the chapters but i'll be sure to go triple check them and make the edits!

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