1.4
Escape 1.4
"Next!"
Let it never be said that Celestia Morningstar- err, Sunbeam Daffodil Flora, had little patience. She had created a 1000 year gambit to ensure that her sister was either saved or dealt with. She had endured the Never-Ending Sorrows spell and survived. She had stared into the Eternal Plane of Madness long enough to make IT blink. But at last, she had met her match.
"NEXT!"
She had met her match. Tree of Harmony save her, she had met her match. The unreasonably long lines, the maddening babble of ponies gossiping about every topic imaginable, the overworked cooling systems that left everypony sweating, the constant standing in place...
"Next!"
The first thing that she was going to do once she got settled in in Ponyville was going to be writing to Luna about the immediate reform of the country's transportation. She had been standing in line for forever and an hour, and worst of all, she was almost out of food. Okay, maybe not worst of all compared to the line. The line standing outside the doors of the Grand Station as the ticket master talked and talked and talked forever with each pony.
"Next!"
She was almost there, though! Only a mare and her rambunctious herd of foals remained between her and freedom. She really should have flown to Ponyville, even if it would have meant dodging patrols and arriving hot and sweaty from flying her flank off. But noooooo, she had to do things the 'smart' way. Nooooo, she had to go via the 'comfy' way, the way that wouldn't draw attention.
"Next! Nex- Holy Harmony Horseradishes!"
As it turns out, masquerading as a mare larger than most farm stallions tends to draw a bit of attention. "One way ticket to Ponyville with luggage, please." The concentrated stares of most of the concourse were really starting to grow more than a little uncomfortable.
The ticket master kept on looking up, and up, and up past her long, lithe legs and well muscled barrel while stammering for a moment. Shaking his head and cleaning his monocle did little to remove the very good but inappropriate thoughts running through his head of a mare like the one before him. Job to do, job to do! He stammered out a correction for her as he pointed at the rates. "That w-will have to be t-two tickets, Ma'am."
"What! Why?"
"Y-your size, Ma'am. We cannot f-fit anypony on a seat alongside you safely." The ticket master bravely responded as he looked up to her.
"Did you just call me fat?"
"M-Ma'am, you ARE twice the size of anypony else here if you will look around. Company policy is that anyp-pony who can sit on somepony else hard enough to s-squash them into jelly must have two tickets. Deeply sorry, Ma'am. P-please don't sit on me, Ma'am..." The ticket master slowly cowered lower and lower behind his counter as Sunbeam's glare slowly grew from 'vaguely irritated' through 'somepony ate all of the ice cream and comfort food in the city' to 'The Wrath of Celestia'.
"So you're saying that because I'm a little bigger than everypony else, I have to pay twice what anypony else would just to-"
"Lookit, lookit, Mommy! I'mma Mountain Climber!"
What?
Sunbeam turned around carefully as she felt a shifting weight bouncing upon her back. There at the nape of her neck pranced a white coated, yellow maned little pegasus filly who half-hovered with wildly buzzing wings. The little one's mother was the mare from earlier, who came running up to them with her other mobile foal close behind. With a bit of a shock, Sunbeam realized that the mare's gaze only just barely reached eye level with her cutie mark despite being larger than normal herself.
"Surprise! Surprise, get off of that poor mare this instant! You know I can't reach that high!"
Sunbeam sighed as the frustration drained away, passing two fares worth of bits to the terrified ticket master behind the counter. Point conceded, one wayward foal roundup to go. "Little one, o' little one, why don't you stick with your mother?"
"I wanna 'splore EVERYTHING! I gotta find all the good stuff to show Auntie Pinkie" Surprise bounced up and down on Sunbeam's back, hopping just out of her mother's grasp each time the rocky-colored mare tried to reach for her.
Stupid annoying youthful spirits cheering her up and destroying her well-earned irritated funk... Sunbeam smiled as the energy of a foal in motion slowly filled her once more and as her own mood was lifted by foalish enthusiasm. She waved off the foal's mother as thoughts began to connect in her mind. "Auntie Pinkie, is it? You wouldn't happen to be heading to Ponyville, would you?" She took her tickets and stuffed them into the easy reach travel pouch around her neck.
The light grey mare nodded for her child as she hopped and tried to grab her daughter once more. "Our family is branching out; and if my wonderful, darling, precocious daughter will stop being a pest, we should get going!" The Pie mare's sweet tone ground down into grating irritation as she hopped over and over trying to reach her flighty filly, all the while knowing that it was irritating her newborn son back to wakefulness.
"Oh, how wonderful! I'm moving there myself to teach several students of a former pupil of mine! Surprise can stay where she is, she's no burden at all compared to my luggage." Sunbeam clapped a wing around the Pie mare as the baggage handlers took her three suitcases with extreme difficulty to load onto a cart for the train. She pushed ahead herself, dragging the family with her towards the nice helpful terminal signboards as the filly on her back bounced and played.
His heart still racing, the ticket master slowly emerged from behind his counter as the danger passed. His mom was right, being a salespony of any kind was the most dangerous job on the planet. There had to be a better way to explain the weight concerns without insinuating that a mare was fat. Or maybe he should just get a shield. Or a safer job like guarding Tartarus.
"NEXT!"
------------------------------
"You know, I know of your family, but I don't know your name. I'm Sunbeam."
"If you know of my family, and 'Auntie Pinkie', you must have worked for Princess Celestia at some point, I bet. I'm Marble Pie. You know my oldest girl, and this other one here is Limey!" Marble replied with an echo of her sister's manic energy as she noogied her young son.
"Argh! Limestone, Mother! Please?"
Marble rolled her eyes at his protest. "He's decided he wants to be all 'mature' like his daddy, and speak with a silly accent like him. The silly colt. And the little one in my bags is called Rocky Road." Marble looked both ways before leaning in to Sunbeam and whispering at a volume her youngest colt couldn't hear conspiratorially. "He's got a bit of a sweet tooth."
Sunbeam put a hoof to her mouth in mock horror. "Oh, no! I'm a sweet pony! He'll gobble me up!" She giggled along with Surprise and Marble as Limestone rolled his eyes and pretended not to notice the inane antics of his mother and her new friend.
The crowded staircase down to the main platforms began to open up as they approached the bottom. But instead of ponies going every which way, they were being herded through a security checkpoint made of several dozen rather narrow arches. Small placards marked with Celestia's face with a red 'no' symbol over them helped to inform everypony that the checkpoints were meant to catch Celestia in disguise. The guards nervously looked about, chatting with the passengers as they were led through and scanned.
Sunbeam's chuckles trailed off nervously as she saw the well-prepared checkpoint, and she wondered if it was still safe to make a run for it.
"Oh, COME ON!" A mare proclaimed as she was led away by security. Her husband, a scruffy mustachio'd white stallion with a straw hat and a cutie mark made of a trio of eggballs followed her helplessly and probably hoped she would be alright.
"Wow. They really are serious about this whole 'catch Celestia so we can make her love us' thing... Kinda silly, since she said she was going on vacation. Besides, why would she use the train when she's strong and tough enough to fly anywhere she wants?" Marble complained as they were led down along to the nearest booth.
"Err, yes, why would she take a train?" Sunbeam unconvincingly answered as she mentally kicked herself hard enough to launch her mental Sunbeam into Low Equis Orbit.
"And she'd probably have enough patience to put up with all those stupid 'fat' suggestions that stupid ticket stallion had to say."
"Oh, Certainly." Stupid hero worship guilt tripping her.
"On second thought, nah. She'd probably have a problem with him too. Nevermind." Marble concluded as she tapped her chin.
The guard at the head of the line rapped his hoof against the floor to catch everypony's attention. "Everypony will step in one at a time for the scanner. It projects a field that cancels most magic and scans for changeling-like spells." The burly guard proclaimed with a hint of worry and irritation as he stood beside the alarmingly narrow archway. Stupid stupid-spawning hero worship.
"One at a time? That's stupid. I'm coming through!" Marble hopped through the crowd with her sister's gait, jumping through the archway while holding onto Limestone before anypony could stop her. The machine beeped once, but stayed silent. Marble rolled her eyes, and looked scathingly at the guards. "Let me guess, your bosses told you that a bunch of ponies going through all at once confuses it?" Slow, angry nods answered her. "Eh, kinda. My family provides the gems for stuff like this. They don't get mixed up, they just slow down for a second. Hey, Sunbeam, Surprise! C'mon you two slowpokes!"
The guards turned to each other and whispered a few things between themselves as they made a decision. One talked into a remote headset for the team on the other side. "Tell the test crew to go ahead and use the Sparkle Process on that couple."
From somewhere else within the station came the squeal of a startled mare that was loud enough to probably crack granite. "AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEE! Oh, that's cold!"
"Next! You, the orange pegasus with the filly on her head!"
Sunbean sighed in resignation, knowing the jig was up and that she would shortly have to burn her identity to make a run for it. Twilight would be so disappointed in her. Like a prisoner to their ritual pie-ing, she stepped up to the scanner with Surprise squee-ing on her back about how fun it appeared to be to go through the funny curtain thing. Screwing up her courage, Sunbeam stepped through.
In an instant, she could feel the field attacking her invisible horn, coating it as the field formed to her face. It was always hard stepping through an anti-magic field because of her raw power, and she struggled to get through it. Oddly, it was tightest around her flanks as she struggled through, dragging her slower and slower until she found herself getting stuck.
"What's with those readings?"
"I don't know sir, I think it's because her flanks are-"
Just a little more shoving and- Kerfwooosh-POP!
Smoke began to billow from the machine as she pushed her too-wide hips through the relatively flimsy arch and broke it. Flashing erratically, the little lights on top went nuts and beeped wildly as Surprise giddily laughed on her back. Breaking a little further, the machine fell apart onto her hindquarters as she struggled to free herself.
"You know, I'm pretty sure that's a no."
"Somebody send a cleanup crew before she breaks it more with her hips!"
Realy? Another fat comment, universe? Sunbeam growled as she tried to pull herself free, "Ah, horse-"
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You're sent to the moon and you're sent to the moon :P
I love it, lol. Can't wait to see what happens next.
Lol poor poor tia all see wanted was a break and maybe help twi out
Hilariously relevant
Princesses with a jelly-phobia, overzealous guards in a flight chase knocked down by pie and Celly in a bigger then average pegasus suit? This bears the markings of one 'must read' fic.
I'd make a comment about how she's probably heavy with all of that muscle (and - emphatically - heavy =/= fat, especially since muscle weighs more), but as ponies all kinda have super strength anyway...!
Lol!
of course she's not fat, she just has a big personality.
I know you had her turn into a big pony just for comedy purposes because it defies logic why she didn't just make herself look normal sized.
I do wish there was a picture of her in this form though.
4352811
The closer to her normal form she is, the easier it is for the illusion to hide her. Physical features don't go away under the spell (see: Celestia's extra-length donut rack), and trying to explain why a mare the size of Twilight is bowling over ponies a foot or two away would be rather awkward. Additionally, she established (To a rough definition of the term) this cover identity years ago to train Twilight, and it would raise a lot of questions for her to suddenly appear normal sized
4352811
The closer to her normal form she is, the easier it is for the illusion to hide her. Physical features don't go away under the spell (see: Celestia's extra-length donut rack), and trying to explain why a mare the size of Twilight is bowling over ponies a foot or two away would be rather awkward. Additionally, she established (To a rough definition of the term) this cover identity years ago to train Twilight, and it would raise a lot of questions for her to suddenly appear normal sized
When Celestia stares long into the abyss, the abyss blushes and squeals, "Senpai noticed me!
"
4352922 4352923
You accidentally that post.
4352669 I doubt the comics are canon
You know, this could technically be called a Scootamom reboot...
I worship you, Senpai!
Why would she choose to be such a...heavy set mare? Also, anyone else thinking of a fat Miss Harsh Whinny with wings?
4354606 ok never mind, just read one of the author's posts.
I'm now reminded of Hail to the King where Not-Sombra spazzes out wondering how Celestia got so much bigger than anyone else. And subsequently makes her feel self-conscious enough to make her skip dessert.
4354606
She has the size and most of the build of Big Macintosh, with more lithe legs. Except for her rump.
She cannot lie.
She's a Brick... House.
And I have a new favorite to read!
Who knew Equestria was so codependent about its Princess?
Celestia has one big plot apparently...
*Really
And in this chapter, Celestia is saved by an entirely different kind of Pie. Marble is clearly helping her and clearly knows who she is, damn Pie family powers.
4355224 So the machines lie for her then? What have her scales been telling her all this time?
4357205
Help! Help! I'm being oppressed!
Buncakes.
After her vacation is over, Celestia is going to take the list that she is now creating in her head and use it as the list of volunteers for Equestria's first colony... on the Moon!
Apparently, Sunbeam is considered level 6. 'Oh HELL no!'
Surprise as a filly? THE HORROR!
iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/131514636935.gif
Sorry Celestia, but all those donuts and cakes caught up to you quickly. Maybe it's time she went on a
Diet 
. Oh the humanity.
This reminds me when I went on a trip to the UK, and discovered it was easier to leave the US than it was to go back.
4440535
HEY, she's not fat, she's FLUFFY!
Uh, her name is Celestia, without that ridiculous Morningstar
Celestia's not fat...she's fluffy.
of course she's not Fat! She's well built!
...i seriously cannot imaging the celestial you are trying to depict. Do you have an image I can use as a reference.
Oh Tia... just means there's more of you to love. And the stallions do love it, and wish to show their love... several times to make sure its consistently meaningful. Just be careful, wouldn't want to get knocked up and give birth to a spunky pegasus filly with a orange coat and purple mane.
I like big flanks and I cannot lie. You other stallions can't deny.
This is the second fanfic I've read that's mention the sparkle method for detecting changelings. Where is that from exactly anyway?
Really could have though this through better.
5126691
And Sweetie Belle can't cast spells with songs.
Its a fanfiction, dude. Authors are allowed to take certain liberties.
This is were I wonder why Celestia choose this particular disguise. A disguise is supposed to make you indistinguishable from a certain lot. So why choose the form of an overly muscular and big mare, then a timid little normal thing, like Fluttershy's appearance for example?
Is she just that bad at transmogrification magic? Because as it is she is still standing out in public, and that kind of defy's the purpose of a disguise.
6071372 Unless you just go for the absurdity factor of it, in which case it's brilliant.
5126691 And how would you know? Did the governor of Hawaii certify her birth certificate?
6071372 One possibility is that transformation gets more and more uncomfortable and harder to maintain the more they change your size.
Shakira's hips don't lie, but Celestia's sure do.