Chapter 8 - In Which Explanations Explain Absolutely Nothing
Let's see...
Can't see or hear anything? Check.
Unable to scratch irritating itch on my nose? Check.
Can think just clearly enough to make a checklist even though I'm still unconscious? Check.
Inevitable desire for large quantities of food? No-wait... I definitely need some food right now. Check.
At least that means that I'm waking up soon. But why is it that every time I'm unconscious, that's the first thing that I think about right before waking up? I'm not even...
Well, I guess I could use a bite to eat now that I think about it. A nice-sized chunk of alexandrite would be pretty nice. It's a pain to get it to be just the right flavor, but when you do...
Spike opened his eyes when he felt something wet against the side of his head.
And I slobbered all over my pillow. Great. At least I didn't try to eat the bed this time.
He groaned. That was not a memory he enjoyed remembering. Even worse, he had overslept and kept Rainbow Dash (who was at the library to "secretly" borrow a new novel) waiting for too long. She barged into his room, took one look at his awkward position, and fell to the ground laughing.
It was a long month before she stopped teasing him about it, and even now he can't go to Quills and Sofas without her asking him how his lunch was.
Come to think of it, where am I now? The last thing I remember... oh. That is not good.
Spike hesitantly raised his claws, automatically relieved when he found out that he could still move them. Both of his forelimbs were completely covered by firmly-wrapped bandages, so he couldn't see the extent of the damage caused by his desperate gamble.
Good news is, now he's only feeling intense pain coursing through his abused limbs rather than unbearable pain.
That's a good thing, right?
Deciding to take his mind off his injuries, Spike scanned his surroundings.
He was currently lying down on a bed surrounded on three sides by white curtains. Behind him was a blank wall. Sounds of soft breathing filled the air, disturbed only by an occasional whimper or moan.
Even without all that, the sterile smell gives it away. The infirmary wing eh? Could have been worse.
"Yo! Spike bro! Heard you were stuck here again! You still alive, buddy?"
... Spoke too soon.
The curtain surrounding him was quickly torn open, revealing a jet black pegasus guard sans the armor. His scruffy mane was even messier (apparently it was possible) now that there was no helmet to cover it, but it could not hide the smirk present on his face.
"I’m too stubborn to kick the bucket that easily Jett," Spike rasped, who was mildly surprised at the roughness of his voice. "You of all ponies should know that."
Jett simply laughed and captured Spike in a friendly headlock, much to the latter's discomfort.
"Hey, it's like I always say: 'There's no better way to make friends than by trying to kill each other!'"
"Isn't that why I'm your only friend, even after three years?"
"Not my fault none of these ponies can deal with my awesomeness."
"... I get the feeling that you might get along well with these two ponies I know. No doubt you'll be at each others' throats after a few seconds."
"Sweet!" Jett continued to laugh while giving Spike a noogie. Said dragon could only make a resigned expression.
"Ahem."
The two froze as a certain earth pony approached the bed.
Spike gulped. This isn't going to end well...
Jett, upon seeing his friend's obvious reaction, grinned evilly. He released the petrified dragon and casually made his way to the exit.
"Later little bro! I don't envy your situation in the slightest!"
Traitor!
Spike stared awkwardly at Apple Bloom, who returned it without emotion. An uneasy silence settled, and the dragon racked his brain for a way to escape.
Is it too late to look for a conveniently placed window? Cripes! What the hay did I do?! Wait a minute, did I even do anything this time?
"You drool when you're unconscious."
… What?
Out of all the things Spike expected to hear, that was not one of them.
He was even more surprised when Apple Bloom galloped out of the room.
Spike tried to go after her, but he had to bite back a scream of pain the moment his claws touched the ground. He made a brief mental note to avoid doing that again before hopping on his rear legs and taking off.
It was a little awkward at first since he had gotten so used to quadrupedal movement, but he was still capable of getting around. Besides, he really didn't have much of a choice with the condition his front claws were in.
As he ran, a million thoughts rushed through Spike's mind. At the forefront, however, was:
What's wrong with Apple Bloom?
Despite his obvious denseness (which, contrary to popular opinion, he is somewhat aware of), there was no fooling him when it came to these types of things. She was over at the library so often to the point of spending every other night there, in her own room. Hay, most days, there was a good chance that if one of them was spotted, the other would be nearby. Of course, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were with them too, but that fact was conveniently ignored by everypony.
Come to think of it, do I have any other friends of my own aside from those three, Twilight, and Jett?
If he wasn't in such a hurry, Spike might have lamented about his lack of a social life.
Apple Bloom was the type of pony that would choose not to mope around and directly confront whatever or whoever made her upset in the first place. Blatantly running away just wasn't her. And he saw the expression she was making.
Now there's absolutely no way I can just leave her alone.
Spike snatched a glass of water, along with a few pastries, from a passing cart.
There was only one place she could be headed.
...
Normally, you'd assume that an earth pony would escape to someplace close to the ground or plentiful in nature when distressed. The keyword in that sentence being "normally".
Ponies from Ponyville tended to be anything but "normal".
Few ponies were aware of this, but the part of the castle deemed "Luna's Tower", where the Princess of the Night raises and lowers the moon, is usually open. Then again, few enough ponies would willingly go near it in the first place - and that's when it's empty. Even so, the tower technically was open to all so long as it wasn't in use. It's a great place if you need to be alone.
"And the view isn't half-bad either, right?"
Apple Bloom nearly fell over the railing in surprise, but quickly regained her composure. Spike was hunched over near the entrance to the balcony, panting heavily.
"Ran all the way up the stairs?"
"Uh-huh." Spike wheezed. "I might need a minute. Losing consciousness is not the same as resting."
Apple Bloom rolled her eyes, turning around. The view from here was excellent, but the view looked pretty bad.
Canterlot had certainly taken quite a beating. Most buildings were either demolished or very close. It seemed like chunks of the mountain had somehow made their way into the town. Large piles of rocks and sticks littered the streets, undoubtedly caused by the joint Twisted Timber/Clunker Golem raid. The land was wrecked, but not beyond repair. Fortunately, many ponies were already up and about and busy with cleaning up the mess.
Hearing Spike approach, Apple Bloom spoke up.
"You've been out for only half the day. After Magister was taken care of, one of the first things the Princesses did, after I hauled your scaly butt to the infirmary, was to fix the sky. Accordin' to the them, there weren't any fatalities, though there are tons of injured ponies. About half of the city guard's are gonna be outta commission, and most of the ones in the castle too. But it really could have been worse."
"That's good."
"Yeah..."
Silence settled. Spike took a deep breath, mentally preparing himself. He really wasn't good with these kinds of things.
"AB? You want to tell me what's on your mind?"
Apple Bloom sighed. "I ain't too sure myself. I know I ain't exactly mad, but you could say that I'm feeling mighty frustrated."
"Because...?"
"...yesterday." Apple Bloom muttered.
"A bit louder please."
"I said that I'm annoyed with how completely useless I was yesterday!"
"What are you... oh..." Spike's eyes widened with realization. That might not have been the wisest thing to do.
"See!" Apple Bloom pointed her hoof at him. "Even you think that I'm just a worthless tag along!"
"Eh, 'worthless' might be taking it too far, but I really can't deny that you haven't been exactly helpful recently."
"Exactly! All I did was mess up that Express thingy and got us thrown into the lake-"
"Believe me, I've had worse landings."
"- nearly gotten us killed -"
"Not the first time. Kinda weird how I'm used to that."
"- then I probably just got in your way while sneakin' around the castle -"
"It didn't really matter in the end though," Spike shrugged. Apple Bloom shot him a glare that clearly told him to stop interrupting. He shut up.
"Worst of all, I didn't do anything in that fight against Magister! All I did was buck him once between the eyes, and all that was good for was for nearly shatterin' my ankles! Even Magister himself completely ignored me!"
"You make that sound like a bad thing."
Apple Bloom sighed. "It's not that simple Spike. You wouldn't understand."
At this, Spike's expression visibly dropped. "Actually... I do."
"What do you mean?"
Spike looked around until he was convinced that they were alone.
"AB, what I'm about to tell you... you need to promise me that you won't tell anypony else, all right?"
"Okay...? Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." After going through the required motions, Apple Bloom waited for Spike to continue.
"First of all, you of all ponies should know what it's like to be living in shadow of somepony you care for." She winced. "Exactly. Underneath that envy and irritation from being compared to them or feeling inferior, there's also the intense frustration from knowing that there's nothing you can really do for them. I was Twi's assistant for eight whole years and all I was ever good for was the housework that anypony could've done.
"She was always smarter than I was, so when she was studying all I could do was get out of her way and clean up after. In fact, she homeschooled me time right up to the point where she became a princess and had to leave. Whenever she had problems, I listened, but there was very little I could do that wouldn't just cause more trouble. It wasn't that bad back when we were in Canterlot though, but I still felt like that I was taking way more from her than I could give back.
"Moving to Ponyville was both a great and depressing experience. Great, because of all the awesome things I was exposed to and all the new ponies that were leagues better company than those stiffs back at Canterlot. Depressing, because I've never felt so worthless in my entire life.
"While I am still admittedly resentful for how Twi began to ignore me and start piling on the chores, I grit my fangs and beared with it because I didn't want to become any more of a burden than I already was." Spike gave a long and weary sigh. "Besides, the past is the past anyways. No point in wasting time nor energy with being angry for stuff like that. And it doesn't even come close to what I hated the most.”
"The number one thing that I resented the most was how useless I was during Twilight's adventures. During the whole Nightmare Moon crisis, I couldn't do anything other than cower in fear. That incident with Discord before he was sort-of reformed, I was as helpful as ice cream during winter. My birthday was a disaster for everypony. Canterlot Wedding fiasco... I should have believed her instead of doubting her the way I did. Never have I ever regretted anything so much.”
"Sure, there was that time with the Crystal Heart, but I wasn't under any illusion. I was aware that I was nothing more than just the occasional comic relief. A fool." Spike took a shaky breath. He hated this next part.
"'All I am and ever would be is a parasite. Disappear, fade from existence. Nopony would care. In fact, it'll make everypony's lives better.’
“That's what I thought on most days, before and after moving to Ponyville. Sometimes I even believed it. After all, I'm very easily ignored anyways. Me just up and vanishing wouldn't make much of a difference. I lost count of the number of times where I was sorely tempted to follow through on that.”
"What stopped me?" Spike ruefully smiled. "Selfishness, I suppose. Didn't want to, because why should I? Like I just said, no point in mulling over these types of things.”
"After a while, I realized that I was insane. I expected something different to happen from doing the same thing over and over again. I was tired of putting up an act where everything was as great for me as it was for her. So even though it hurt, I chose to change; to leave her side so that I can get a different result. That's why I separated from Twilight. My decision might have seemed sudden to you guys, but it was something that I had been dwelling on for a long time; way before Twilight was promoted to princess. Her coronation just so happened to give me the last push I needed.”
"I refused to weigh her down any longer. She now had wings, and I wasn't going to be the one who would cause them to burn up," Spike finished. His melancholy mood had brought a noticable chill to the air, despite the sun shining brightly above them.
Apple Bloom was stunned, to say the least. She always suspected Spike had been troubled by something, but she never would have guessed that it haunted him for that long and to that extent. He never was the same, and now she knew why.
Spike sheepishly scratched the back of his head, breaking the somber atmosphere. "Sorry about that AB. I originally meant to tell you that there are times where you'll need to rely on others since you can't do anything yourself - a lesson I'm all-too familiar with. And during those times, the way you can help isn't what you would expect; you just need to learn to look. I didn't mean to start monologuing about my problems."
"No," Apple Bloom quickly shook her head. "It's good that you're lettin' the bad thoughts out. Big sis always tells me that lettin' that fester will only cause trouble. And you know that you can tell me anythin', right?"
The dragon chuckled. "Since when did this turn to you cheering me up? Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around?"
Apple Bloom smiled. "Hey, the Princesses are waitin' for you. I was supposed to bring you to them when you woke up, but I guess we sorta got sidetracked, huh?"
"Don't worry about that. Moth-err, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are pretty understanding. I'm sure they won't mind, but we should probably be going regardless."
"Fine," Apple Bloom half-trotted, half-limped to the door before stopping. "Hey, Spike?"
"Yeah?"
"Thanks for bein' honest. After a while, a mare just gets tired of the pity other ponies pass off as comfort."
"Let's just say that you aren't the only one sick of it. Before we go though-"
"And afore you ask, my ankles ain't too messed up. The Princesses' magic fixed most of it, and the rest will heal in time."
"Good, but I still feel kinda bad about getting you dragged into this mess." The two began the long climb down.
"Then make it up to me by explainin' some things on the way. Like who that 'Jett' pony is and why you two tried to kill each other."
"Funny story about that, actually. His full name is Jetstream, but he prefers Jett. Long story short, he used to be a thief and I caught him sneaking around the castle around three years back while I was, well, sneaking around the castle. We ended up fighting, but had to call a sort of truce before we were caught. He really didn't seem like that bad of a pony, so I pulled some strings and helped him land a job here. And now we're pals. That's pretty much it right there."
How would he have...? "Okay then... what about those guards that seemed to hate you?"
"That's simple: they do hate me and it’s mostly because I'm a dragon, but I'm used to the prejudice. I grew up around here, after all. Canterlot ponies aren’t exactly the most tolerant of other species. And the one that insulted you was one of Twi's old bullies who had gotten too arrogant after Shining Armor left for training. He probably still holds a grudge after I burned off most of his fur. I still don't get why he's mad; it did grow back after a couple of years."
Apple Bloom made a mental note to inquire more about that prejudice issue at a later date. There was only so much painful reminiscing she could take in one afternoon. Trying to act casual, she asked her next question.
"What about that 'marefriend' thing then? Is it really true?"
"Oh, that," Spike chuckled awkwardly. "It's only half-true. The wedding and the pregnancy thing were completely made up. Besides, it's a fake 'relationship' anyways brought about by obsessive fancolts. But she really is one of the kindest ponies I know."
"Are you sure about that?"
"I would imagine, since it is Fluttershy we're talking about."
"Now you gotta tell me how that happened, in detail!"
"Well, you remember that poll I mentioned before? It goes like this..."
...
"... the restraining orders were rendered ineffective once they brought their secret weapon: lawyers. Angel valiantly repelled the obsessed fans with his deadly carrot sword, but even he had to retreat when they busted out the vegetable peelers and started boiling water. If it hadn't for Pinkie Pie's timely arrival with distractingly tasty baked goods, it is very well possible that we would've lost the war right then and there.
"Unfortunately, while we had forced them to retreat for the night, by that time moral was at an all time low, we were vastly outnumbered from the start, and it was as if their numbers were inexhaustible. Even worse, the defeated would not stay defeated. From a glance, I could tell that my comrades were thinking the same thing I was: tomorrow's battle would be the one to decide everything..."
Spike had a distant look in his eyes, while Apple Bloom rolled hers. It wasn't that she didn't believe him, but the way he was telling it really made her irritated that she missed the whole thing. They were unaware of the crowd of ponies that had gathered and was following them, listening eagerly to Spike's tale.
"I tell you AB; I've seen things nopony and nodragon should ever see. If they did that to pictures, I do not want to know what they would do to the real thing." The young dragon shuddered before continuing. "It is truly fortunate that the lady had already retreated to the inner sanctums of our stronghold so that she would be spared from witnessing such vulgarity."
"Mind repeatin' that last part without all the fancy jibber-jabber?"
"It was a good thing that Fluttershy had locked herself in her room so she didn't have to see their public acts of grossness."
"... suddenly I ain't so mad 'bout bein' left out."
"Can't blame you. Angel and I are metally scarred for life. Brothers bound by trauma, that we are. It took all that we had to suppress the memories and images as the sun rose on the final confrontation... ah, we're almost there." Spike noted as the lobby came into sight. "No time to tell the full conclusion. Guess I'll have to skip to the end then."
There was a collective groan from behind them, to which the two responded by whipping around to see a multitude of ponies "casually" going about their jobs in a very crowded hallway.
Spike and Apple Bloom looked at each other and shrugged before resuming their conversation as they walked.
"The night before, we sent one of Fluttershy's bird friends with a request for aid. In the midst of the battle, she returned with a message from Rarity that told of a plan of deception. An all-or-nothing gamble, since it could either bring us victory or crushing defeat. It was quickly passed to Fluttershy, and upon seeing our desperation, she agreed after hearing that our reinforcements might not arrive in time. So, since I was the only viable option at the time, she announced to the enemy forces that we were in a 'relationship' and that she had no intentions to end it anytime soon.
"Our enemies were instantly disheartened and trudged back to whence they came with a forlorn air about them. The animals and I cheered, relieved that we had managed to hold out. Some of our foes were stubborn though, and we were had to maintain the facade for fear of what would happen if they found out. If Discord hadn't returned from his vacation and dropped by for a visit before giving us a sort-of reprieve after a lot of begging from me and one stern look fron Fluttershy, I have no doubt that the two of us might've been forced to plan a fake wedding cermony by now." Spike finally finished.
"So let me get this straight: you were helpin' Fluttershy carry her groceries home under the promise of freshly-baked cookies, when a direct assault by fancolts made you and Angel Bunny team up with a buncha Fluttershy's animal friends to fight them off several times over the course of two days until Rarity told you to fake-date each other?"
"More-or-less, but Rarity's plan was to make up a fake coltfriend for Fluttershy. She panicked and said that it was me instead."
"All this happened to you just 'cause you wanted some cookies?"
"Fluttershy's cookies are the best."
"Ain't gonna deny that. Just don't tell Pinkie Pie."
"Agreed."
The two shared a laugh while the crowd dispersed, most likely to actually do their jobs. Spike stopped once he noticed the hastily-made replacement door (which was actually just a curtain somepony hung above the doorframe).
"Why are we back at the throne room? Wasn't this place trashed?"
"You'll see when we go in."
Spike wanted to ask more, but it really wouldn't be fair since he does the same thing. Very often too, in fact. Half-resigned, half-curious, he carefully gripped the curtain and slid it to the side.
He found himself snout to barrel with a very familiar cannon. The deluxe jumbo version, too.
More out of trained reflex than instinct, Spike and Apple Bloom dove for cover just as what can only be described as a ball of pure party essence blasted out of the cannon and exploded in the middle of the lobby with a huge BANG! coupled with a blinding flash and what sounded like a hundred party horns going off at once.
Once the commotion died down, they uncovered their eyes and were only mildly surprised.
Confetti and balloons rained down from the rafters, though their origin is unknown. Streamers and various other decorations hung from the walls. A DJ booth had been set up in one of the corners, complete with the largest set of amps that either of them had ever seen. Strobe lights were blasting everywhere. Anypony caught in the blast now found themselves confused with party hats and either highly luminescent glow sticks or overly huge noisemakers that seemingly materialized out of thin air. A huge sign that read "YAY!!! Congratulations On Beating The Nasty Big Bad Boss Dragon Apple Bloom And Spike Who Is A Much Nicer Dragon Than The One Just Beaten And Now You're About To Go Off On A Really Really Really Long Quest That's Probably Really Really Really Hard But You've Got Friends To Support You So Never Mind That Depressing Stuff And Let's Party!!" was draped over the front wall, covering the massive hole that nopony seems to have fixed yet.
"That's a really, really, really big banner," Apple Bloom and Spike said in unison. They exchanged glances. This could only mean one thing...
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!"
"Darn it!" The purple dragon growled before sighing.
No matter how many times either of one experienced this, neither of them would ever truly get used to it.
The instant Spike stood in front of the doorway (this time at a distance), the cannon went off again. Only, instead of a party-in-a-ball, a pink blur came speeding out.
Spike braced for impact and dug his claws into the ground. He grunted as he felt the blur ram into his gut, though it didn't hurt as much as it should've. That didn't stop him from skidding back a few feet. Gritting his teeth, he wrapped his bandaged arms/forelimbs around the pink projectile and centered himself to regain his balance before coming to a halt.
If the Pinkie Pie Catch were an official sport, Spike and Apple Bloom would be the reigning champions due to their experience alone.
"Heya Spikey!" Pinkie Pie shouted, wrapping her hooves around the exhausted dragon and pulling him into one of her familiar bone-crushing hugs. Even with his scales, Spike had to gasp for breath before she eventually loosened her iron hold. "It's been a long, long, long time since I saw either you and Apple Bloom. Is there something you wanna tell your old pal Pinkie about? Is there? Is there?"
The pink party pony was pressing the side of her face hard against Spike's cheek, making the young dragon gulp. It wasn't so much that Pinkie herself was uncomfortable to hold - as she was rather soft and always smelled like sweets - but he is technically the equivalent of a pony in the latter stages of puberty, and having a sweet-smelling and admittedly pretty mare (who was also only a couple of years older than him) in his personal space really doesn't help in the slightest. Granted, he was slightly comforted by the fact that it was just Pinkie Pie being friendly, but he couldn't help but notice that she had been hugging him way more often lately...
Banishing such thoughts from his mind, Spike was about to respond with a denial - as was Apple Bloom from the looks of it - when Pinkie suddenly pulled back. Unseen to both mares, the dragon breathed a silent sigh of relief.
"Just kidding! The Princesses already filled me in on everything!" Pinkie Pie grinned, before pouting. "But Spike... you need to remember that you have friends! Gasp! Or, do you not think that we're friends?!"
"We're definitely friends Pinkie Pie," Spike chuckled. "I haven't met a single soul that you couldn't befriend. Even if I was a sour old goat like Cranky, you'd still find a way." Spike paused. "You actually did find a way, so I guess that speaks for itself."
"Great!" The mare unlatched herself from the dragon and started bouncing around. "I wanna stay here and talk more, but the ponies of the town are in dire need of a party to cheer them up! And there ain't no party like a Pinkie Pie party because a Pinkie Pie party is so very hearty!"
"I thought it was- never mind."
"Bye Spikey! Remember to keep your promises, okie dokie?" Pinkie Pie yelled before hopping on top of her cannon. "Hi-Yo Super Incredible Lasting Very Extraordinary Really Pinkie Pie Party Cannon, away!"
The wheels on the side began spinning fast enough to produce smoke from the friction, and the barrel reared up and neighed before speeding away. The ponies near the banner scrambled to lift it up just as the lone Pinkie and her trusty steed rushed past.
A certain dragon and teenage mare watched casually from afar.
"Nice weather today, right?"
"Uh-huh."
"That was new."
"Indeed. I was expecting her to jump in and vanish again."
"She might've needed it or somethin'."
"Oh yeah. An instant party in a single blast. I can see how convenient that must be for her."
"You forgot to mention: for today's partiers on the go.”
Other ponies looked at the two who looked so nonchalant about the strange sight as if they were mental. They weren't, and had simply abandoned any attempt to logically comprehend the actions of a certain party pony.
If they hadn't, they really would have gone mental by now.
But even Pinkie Pie's bewildering antics did not make Spike completely immune to odd sights, such as the one in the throne room.
A table was somehow set up in the middle of the wrecked chamber. Sitting around it in order from left to right and forming the most bizarre tea party was a violently trembling Fluttershy, who was spilling half her tea due to her shaking, followed by an indifferent Princess Luna toiling away at what was definitely a hoofheld gaming system. After her was a very tense, subtly twitching Princess Celestia who was sporting the most forced smile in history as she robotically poured tea from a fancy teapot with her magic. And at the far right was an old orange dragon, drinking tea from the largest teacup Spike and Apple Bloom had ever seen while apparently engrossed in a book that was several times too small for his size.
With all that presented in front of him, a confused purple dragon could only wonder one thing:
How much tea is in that pot? There's no way it can hold that much from the physical dimensions alone...
Make that two things.
The dragon's scales were edged with gray, but only just. His wing membranes were frayed, though most likely still capable of flight. He had a wave-like crest atop his head, along with a series of reddish-orange spines running down the length of his back. Frills were prominently displayed along the base of his jaw, giving the slight pretense of a beard. Curiously, there was a large diagonal scar on his chest just between his forelegs; recent by the looks of it. Also, he looked strikingly familiar, but Spike just could not quite place his claw where he had seen him before..
Spike shut his eyes and briefly concentrated on his mana. The capacity fell just short of one of the alicorn sisters, but the power level was roughly the same as the capacity. However, what stood out to Spike was the reading he got from his mana. It felt... scholarly, in a way, yet warm at the same time; and that gave him a good feeling about this dragon.
Before Spike could gleam anymore info from his scan, Apple Bloom nudged him as their presence was noticed.
"Ah, Spike! So glad you could join us!" Celestia called out, hints of sincerity starting to appear in her expression. The rest of the table had varying reactions. Luna paused her game long enough to send a smile at the two before immediately returning to her furious button mashing and frantic screen swiping with her magic-controlled stylus. The dragon set aside his book and gave both of them an apologetic look, though what exactly he was apologizing for is unknown. Fluttershy was noticeably relieved by their arrival and even started to settle down very slightly.
"Good afternoon, m-Princess Celestia. Au-Princess Luna. Pri-err, Fluttershy. Strange dragon I don't know." Spike nodded to each in turn.
"Howdy!" Apple Bloom waved.
"U-um, I-I'll g-g-go an-and ge-g-get s-s-some m-more t-t-t-tea," Fluttershy quietly stammered.
Odd, it's been a while since she went full-on Stuttershy. The only reason why she might revert back to that is if she's extremely nervous or afraid. Mother seems to be fine, if not acting rather odd, and Aunt Luna isn't breaking out in “ye olde speaking” again, so what could it be? It might just be the fully grown dragon in the room, but he seems alright I guess.
If Spike had eyebrows, they'd undoubtedly be furrowed from concentrating right now.
Other than that, the only other thing I can think of off the top of my head is that she's intimidated by the Celestial Sisters' presence. But... that doesn't really make that much sense. She's already met mother and Aunt Luna several times, and neither of them are particular on the formalities nowadays. Why would...?
Fluttershy made a move for the teapot, only to be restrained by a golden aura binding her to her chair. She let out a terrified squeak as Celestia slowly and deliberately faced her with her obviously strained expression.
"Why my dear Fluttershy, you needn't worry about that at all!" Celestia replied with false enthusiasm. "There is still plenty of tea left, and we have much to discuss after all."
Spike and Fluttershy shared a look. That was never a good sign.
Celestia continued. "A certain bird took it upon himself to enlighten me with the identity of my soon to be daughter-in-law carrying my grandfoal shortly before you two arrived. I believe my assistance was wanted in the naming? I am more than happy to oblige of course, but..."
She shot Spike a look that made him gulp.
"I need to have an overdue conversation with my son first."
Upset mother, who is also the princess of the country and renowned for her magical prowess, who's livid at what she presumes to be two irresponsible youths that apparently went behind her back and, ignoring common sense, engaged in acts of copulation?
... yup, that would probably do it. Though Fluttershy and I know that no such thing was done, she thinks it was done, which means in her mind we really did do it even if we didn't, but she doesn't know that we didn't do the thing that she thought we did, so to her it's the same as if we actually did do that which she thinks she knows we did but actually didn't!
Hold on, what in Equestria did I just think?
On the bright side, most of that rage isn't directed at Fluttershy. Downside, I am in some deep fecal matter right now.
By this point, Celestia dropped her facade and fixed Spike with a stern expression that made him freeze up in fear.
Apple Bloom and the orange dragon were hopelessly confused; both due to lacking information in the matter, although the former was starting to piece it together already on her own.
Fluttershy had gone crimson from the Princess's assumptions and was hiding behind her mane while trying to sink into her chair.
Meanwhile, Spike was rapidly connecting the dots in his head. Who- wait, a 'certain bird'? JETT!!!
Luna's eye twitched slightly as her mind was flooded with the amount of curses Spike was mentally swearing. She had yet to remove the telepathic link she had established between them, though the young dragon was too occupied to notice that he had an unintentional audience.
Oh my... I was not aware that Spike had developed such an extensive and colorful vocabulary. I suppose it comes from living in a library. Very impressive, but just how many languages does he know? I doubt sister would be happy if her son was fluent only with ahem, "certain" words.
The Mare of the Moon briefly wondered if her sister would mind if she fell over laughing from some particularly creative word usage, but she doubted she would even notice from the way she was staring down the "couple".
She shrugged. Laughing at her nephew's misfortune could wait. There were more pressing matters at hoof anyways.
Eat L*ght Arrows, Yuga-Gan*n! Once I defeat you, H*rule and L*rule will finally be free from your evil painting skills!
...
Once Celestia was convinced that Fluttershy was not pregnant and told of the circumstances leading up to their "relationship" - albeit in a faster, less entertaining way - the pegasus was finally allowed to politely excuse herself from the table to help out at the Infirmary.
And not a second too soon, Spike observed wryly, if the way she bolted out the door at a speed that would make Rainbow Dash jealous is anything to go by. Though, I will admit that I am mildly worried about the idiots that are undoubtedly going to injure themselves on purpose just to see her...
… hmm, I wonder if she would mind taking care of a particularly troublesome pegasus guard if he has a little "accident"?
"Spike, please refrain from plotting ways to viciously injure your friend in a way that cannot be traced back to you until after this meeting."
"Yes, Aunt Luna."
Luna put down her game as she pushed up a pair of glasses that she had pulled out of nowhere, causing light to reflect off of the lenses in a way that shielded her eyes from view.
"I will even help you."
A quick glance revealed that Spike was now wearing glasses as well, and they too were creating quite a glare.
"Excellent."
The slightly evil chuckling and the visible mischievous aura coming from both of them caused the other occupants of the table to nervously look on at the pair.
"Should I be worried about that?"
"Dear Apple Bloom, when it comes to those two, even I cannot be entirely sure."
"Excuse me," the orange dragon politely interrupted. He craned his neck so that he did not have to speak too loudly. "I sense something... strange about that dragonling's mana signature. I first noticed it when he arrived, and now that I have had some time to analyze it, I am more that certain that he is a walking anomaly. If it would not be too brash of me to ask, had he somehow been exposed to an intense surge of magic or ingested something that he should not have; like say, any unusual gems?"
"Yes/Yep," both mares replied in unison.
"Which one?"
"Magic," was Princess Celestia's reply.
"Both," was Apple Bloom's. At the Princess's inquiring look, she added, "Some weird gems helped him before, so we thought that this one would heal his injuries from when he jumped into a golem furnace."
Ignoring Celestia's stricken look, the orange dragon nodded thoughtfully. "By any chance, would that golem happen to be a Synthesizer type, and the 'gem' that he consumed was its core?"
Apple Bloom confirmed that to be the case.
"I must commend your feat of defeating a RAID-class golem without prior experience," the old dragon's features became serious, "however, I need to inform you that this is a most dire matter indeed."
"... huh?"
"The dormant magic’s in the core are now running amok within his system and are most likely highly unstable. Without its container acting as a medium, it seems to have been completely absorbed directly into the young dragon. As it is still at an early stage, it does not seem like Spike is in danger at the moment, but suffice to say that may possibly change at a later date."
Celestia chose that moment to speak up. With her expression hidden behind her mane, she quietly yet clearly asked, "What will happen to Spike?"
"I cannot say for sure, but..." the orange dragon trailed off.
There was a long intake of breath from Celestia before she continued in a soft tone. "For the sake of our longstanding friendship, I shall ask again: What. Is. Going. To. Happen. To! My! Son!"
With each word, her tone changed from calm to outraged; and while she wasn't speaking that much louder than normally, her words were volumes louder.
The orange dragon gulped as the full wrath of the Solar Princess was directed at him. As honestly as he could, he replied, "I do not know what to expect per se, due to the fact that this is the first time in the recorded history that I am aware of that such an event has occurred. Worst case scenario, his body will be unable to handle the storm brewing within him and break down on a molecular level in a probable explosion that could send out a pulse of wild mana that would disable magic for your entire country and possibly even the neighboring countries for an indefinite amount of time."
"And that is the worst-case scenario?" The dragon nodded. "Then what is the best-case scenario?"
"Anything except for what I just said. Dragons are resistant to almost all forms of magic, but not immune. And many golems are relics from past civilizations. Their magic cores are still considered mysteries, so knowing how ingesting a core will affect a dragon is unknown, literally anything could happen."
Celestia exhaled resignedly. "... I see. I apologize for my earlier outburst."
"It is no problem at all. I... understand," he had a faraway look in his eyes, "the instinct of a parent to protect their children." He shook his head. "But would you mind telling me the story of how that happened?"
"That is a discussion for another time, but for all intents and purposes, I am his mother."
"Ehhhh?!"
Celestia turned to a gaping Apple Bloom, who had apparently gotten over her initial shock. She tilted her head in confusion. "You mean that he hasn't told you?"
Apple Bloom nervously pushed her front hooves together. "Well, no. Whenever somepony got on the topic of parents, Spike never really wanted to talk that much. Truth be told, most of us just thought that Twilight was his mom."
"Twilight Sparkle may have been the one to hatch Spike, but you must remember that she was only four at the time. Raising a foal - or dragon hatchling, in this case - is far more different from keeping a pet, and I cannot fathom anypony doing so at such an early age. Their relationship is more that of siblings, though the lines are becoming more and more blurred as time passes..."
"Um, 'cuse me? Princess Celestia? You still there?"
"Oh! Pardon me; I was just thinking out loud. Anyhow, I believe I was saying that I am honestly surprised that he has not told anypony. I still remember when he was still a little hatchling, he would waddle around the castle and talk anypony's ears off about how his mommy was the Princess and that one day he would grow up to be a great princess just like her."
Apple Bloom snickered. "Really?"
"Absolutely! I even have some pictures of him trying on my crown and parading around in a dress made from his bedsheets, among others. Would you like to see some?"
It took all she had to keep from laughing outright, so Apple Bloom just nodded. Celestia's horn flared golden as a purple photo album with a green spine materialized in front of them.
"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Before either mare could blink, a purple and green streak whizzed by and snatched the book clean out of the magical aura.
Celestia sighed. "I guess that will have to wait until some other time." Her horn flashed once more as a dark blue album decorated with little stars appeared in front of them. "Would you like to see Lun-"
"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
A larger, dark blue blur sped by and wrenched the book from Celestia's magical grasp.
Spike cleared his throat. Apple Bloom jumped. When had he gotten there?
"Princess, would you PLEASE kindly refrain from providing my friend here with blackmail material? I am more than certain that she will be highly amused at my absolute mortification at past memories I would rather not reminisce about with company present."
Celestia frowned. "Spike, I know I have already asked this before, but would it really be so difficult for you to not be so formal with me?"
"It would not be proper."
"But you're not like that with Luna!"
"Do not drag me into this." Said Princess of the Night subtly adjusted her seat.
"... is that smoke?"
"No it is not," Spike replied quickly. "And do forgive me Princess, but I have only been acquainted with Aunt Luna for only some years. I had not grown up with pricks constantly reminding me to always mind my manners around the princess."
"Hmph." Celestia pouted as she crossed her hooves and turned away.
Apple Bloom was aghast, but at the same time incredibly amused. To think, even the widely acclaimed and admired Princess Celestia would behave like this...
In spite of herself, she giggled, reminding a certain princess that there were others present. Trying to save face, she quickly adopted her usual, more regal posture, but Luna's barely contained chuckles in the background did not help.
The orange dragon decided that this might be a good time to intervene.
"I believe that introductions are in order?" He purposely trailed off, giving Celestia a potential lifeline to move things along.
She took it gratefully. "Of course. How rude of me to delay this for so long."
"It is no problem," the old dragon's eyes twinkled impishly. "You had to deal with family matters after all. I find no fault in you for not being able to remember anything else in that situation."
Luna's suppressed laughter turned into full-out guffawing as her sister visibly tensed.
"Spike," Celestia said through gritted teeth. "This is Mishal. He happens to be an old friend of mine."
"That name certainly brings back memories," he mused. "It has literally been ages since I have been called that."
"Oh, since before the conflict with..."
"That is correct. I apologize for not telling you this sooner, but I have thrown away that name. I happen to go by 'Sheridan' now."
"'The seeker', right?" Spike asked with narrowed eyes.
Sheridan nodded. "One of its meanings. Also the one I most prefer."
"So then what is it you seek, Infernal Magister?" Spike said calmly.
Silence.
Then, Sheridan laughed. And laughed. And laughed some more.
Unlike Magister's, this was... warm. Proud, but not arrogant. And it seemed like most of that pride was directed at Spike, almost like how a teacher expresses joy when they find out that their student has learned something particularly difficult.
"What do you know? An intelligent one!" Sheridan continued to laugh. "That is mighty rare in these types of situations!"
He received three confused glances and one expressionless stare in return.
Wiping away a tear, he explained, "I simply was not expecting him to be bright. His kind are generally known for being, well, not."
Apple Bloom blinked. "You mean dragons?" Sheridan shook his head. "Then who are you talkin' about? And why are you here now?"
"I was talking about heroes. As for my reason for being here..."
Sheridan smiled in a way that clearly showed off his fangs.
"I was sent here to kill all of you."
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You drool when your unconscious is a Percy Jackson reference
Didn't see that coming. So is it some kind of test or a true backstabbing?
... Why does he want to do that, and... DAT LUNA AND SPIKE
I believe the best way to write Pinkie Pie is to remember some of her most obvious traits:
Yep! Yep! Yep! Happy New Year's Everybrony!
1) She (sometimes) tends to break the fourth wall like nopony's business.
2) She likes to talk really fast and hug people to the point of spine-breaking when she is really excited (usually when meeting new friends).
3) She defies logic and common sense quite often (I saw what you did with the S.I.L.V.E.R. cannon, nice!)
4) She thinks lots of happy thoughts even when things get scary.
5) Finally, the best way to write Pinkie would be to go back to all the episodes she is in for character analysis.
*Addendum: Try looking at the stories Hoof, Hoof, Hoof, Pinkie Discovers Jazz, & My Little Pony's Little Ponies; I think the authors do Pinkie Pie justice, right Pinkie?
3716661
Thanks for the advice! It's really helpful, though I'm still not that confident in my writing skills aside from the defying logic part. Strangely, it's actually not that hard for me. I'll definitely keep what you said in mind for the next time Pinkie makes an appearance. When that will be, I have no idea.
Oh.
4455110
Yeah, I'm planning on posting a new chapter as soon as I finish doing some revisions to my earlier chapters. Sorry it's taking so long, but I really needed to focus in my schoolwork for fear of repeating a year. On the bright side, since school's out for the summer and I don't have to repeat the year, the updates should begin again. The next one should be finished in about a week or so.
4456791
Thanks for still supporting this story after all that time.
I really love this story It's probably the best I've ever read on this site aside from Darkphantom13's "Legacy of Dragons and Knights" which by the way all Spike fans should read, like, and follow it's author anyway keep up the excellent work Quilvot
I don’t know why I write, but sometimes you want to believe in a miracle and hope for new chapters...