• Member Since 23rd Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Feb 3rd, 2015

BrassHeart


E

After a fallen candle causes a fire in the Everfree Forest, Ponyville is put in danger. Twilight must quickly mobilize a panicking populace to stop the fire.
Except Fluttershy is still in her home.
Except Zecora is trapped in the forest.
Will Twilight be able to stop the fire in time, or will Ponyville burn?

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 2 )

The plot was a bit meandering, and the quality was a little up-and-down, but overall, that was good. Thumbs up from me. : )

This was a great story, plain and simple. The characters were well-realized and the narration was terrific. Nevertheless, there were some problems. First, the tone was inconsistent. The humor was funny and the drama was suspenseful, but it just didn't mesh. Take, for example, the very beginning of the piece; you start out with this beautiful, somber, wistful scene and then immediately cut to Juvenalian humor. It was well done Juvenalian humor, but the contrast didn't sit well. That kind of jarring tonal switch happened fairly often. Also, some parts of the story felt rushed. Still, this was a great story. More than that, it was a breath of fresh air compared to some of the other contest entries I've read.

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