Chrysalis' Evil Council of Doom

by Matthais Unidostres

First Meeting

Queen Chrysalis' Evil Council of Doom

This is a parody of LittleKuriboh's/CardGamesFTW's Yu-Gi-Oh abridged You Tube video "Marik's Evil Council of Doom." I do not intend to steal his idea, I give him full credit for this.

---

Somewhere in the Everfree Forest...

In a secret underground cavern, the Changeling Queen stood in front of a small crowd of villains.

"Welcome villains. I'm glad to see you all came. I have assembled all the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic villains into one place. This night shall see the end of Twilight Sparkle and her pathetic friends! With our combined evil, we shall defeat them. . . Somehow! Now for the evil roll call! Discord!"

"This evil council is simply fabulous!" the draconequis said as sipped a glass of chocolate milk.

"Gilda the Griffon!"

"Word to your mama!" Gilda said as she gave the "rock on!" hand sign.

"Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon!"

"Yeah, that's us, whatever" Diamond Tiara said sounding uninterested.

"Yeah, whatever!" Silver Spoon added.

"King Sombra!"

"Helloooooo Equestria!" the black unicorn said in a deep voice.

"Small Diamond Dog!"

"Gems!" the dog said.

"Medium and Large Diamond Dogs!"

"Duh!" they both said.

"And finally," Chrysalis said, but stopped and looked down at the paper on the table in front of her, "How do you pronounce this name! I do not speak the pathetic excuse for a language the Timberwolves have. It's just a bunch of growls and howls! Oh forget it!, I'm just gonna call you giant Timberwolf, okay."

The giant Timberwolf just growled intelligibly.

"Yes, okay. Now then, on to business. Evil business! Ah-ha-ha-ha-haaaa!" Chrysalis laughed.

"Wait a minute. Is this it? These are all the villains from Friendship is Magic?" Gilda asked in disbelief.

"What are you blathering about?" Chrysalis said.

Gilda tossed her hands into the air and said, "Come on! This can'tbe it! There's got to be more. I mean, what about Trixie?"

"We don't need Trixie! She would just slow us down with all her skills of slight of hand and illusion and pyrotechnics! That's my story and I'm sticking to it." Chrysalis said with a smile.

"She turned you down, didn't she?" Gilda said with a smirk.

"No! Don't you get it! Trixie isn't one of us! She's not villain material! She's not even evil! If anything she's more like an anti-hero: the worst kind of hero there is! They give us villains a good name!" Chrysalis ranted, pounding the table with her hoof.

"But wait; I'm not a villain either!" Discord said, suddenly sitting up in his chair in sudden realization.

"Of course you're a villain! You were going to cure Equestria with eternal chaos, remember?"

"I was just confused. I didn't know what I was doing. Honestly!" Discord said, "I'm even friends with Flutterhsy now!

"Yeah. Little Discord is too afraid to cause any chaos cause then Fluttershy is gonna break up with him!" Gilda shot out.

"HEY!" Discord shouted out angrily.

Diamond Tiara laughed, "Yeah! What a lamekin!"

"Yeah! Lamekin! Heh-heh-heh!" Silver Spoon said.

Discord snapped his fingers, and a cotton candy cloud poured chocolate milk on the two fillies, causing them to squeal in rage.

"Silence!" Chrysalis shouted, "I command that you all shut-up! We didn't come here to discuss Discord's possible crush on the Element of Kindness!"

"I did!" King Sombra said.

"Shut up! What we came here to do is defeat Twilight Sparkle once and for all!"

"Gems!" the little diamond dog said.

"By the way, there are no free cupcakes, it was a lie," Chrysalis remarked.

"Gems," the diamond dog moaned sadly.

"So how are we going to defeat them?" Gilda asked, and then she smiled evilly, "Are we going to kill them? Because I would be totallyon board with that. Especially if it involves turning Pinkie Pie into cupcakes! I feel so excited whenever I think of that. . ."

"No!" Chrysalis shouted in horror, "We can't kill them! This is a children's show! That would be too obvious anyway. . ."

"Too fun, more like it. . ." Gilda muttered.

"Drum roll, please," Chrysalis said. There was silence. Then she groaned and turned to two Changelings behind her. "I said drum roll!" The Changelings gasped and quickly pulled out drums and started playing a drum roll "Thank you, for Faust's sake. In order to defeat Twilight Sparkle and her friends, we're going to. . . play a game of horse-shoes with them! Dun-dun-duuuuun!"

As the drum roll continued, Gilda stared at Chrysalis as if she were insane. "That's your plan?" she said incredulously.

"This will be no ordinary game. It will... okay you can stop the drum roll now!" The Changelings stopped playing. "Thank you. This game will take place... on a boat!"

"A boat?" Gilda said while rolling her eyes.

"Yes! Ingenious isn't it!"

"Why a boat?" Gilda asked.

"Because, when they lose the game... we'll... push them over the edge of the boat! ...Into the sea!" Chrysalis said, nervously looking around in embarrassment.

"And what is the point of that!" Gilda roared.

"Well, their manes and tails will be soaked! It will take them hours to dry them!" Chrysalis called out desperately.

"Why do we even need to play a game? Why can't we just push them off the boat?" Gilda shouted.

Chrysalis though about this, but then she stomped her hooves and shouted, "No! The game is integral to the plot! The evil plot! Of which I am the evil mastermind!"

"Uh... hey! Where are all the winged ponies?" Diamond Tiara asked.

"Yeah, heh-heh, where are the winged ponies?" Silver Spoon asked.

"What did they just say?" Chrysalis asked Gilda.

"I think they want to know why there aren't any pegasi here," Gilda said,

"Foalish-foals! There are no evil pegasi! They've all been harvested of their Spectra at the Rainbow Factory by Rainbow Dash!"

"Keep telling yourself that," Discord said sarcastically as he filed his lion paw nails.

Gilda sighed in exasperation and said, "Look, if we're going to defeat those ponies, we need to think of something truly evil. Something that doesn't involve playing horse-shoes!"

"What? No horse-shoes? You're insane! ... I mean, more insane than the rest of us!" Chrysalis shouted.

"I have an idea!" the King Sombra said.

"Oh? And what's your idea, evil black crystal unicorn?" Chrysalis asked.

"Why don't we cover all of Equestria in GAK?"

Everyone stared at him.

"That was a joke," he muttered.

"Well, we're not laughing!" Chrysalis shouted, "What about you Giant Timberwolf, do you have any ideas?"

The creautre mumbled something.

"Yeah that's great, shut-up," Chrysalis said quickly.

"Wait a minute," Gilda said, "If these are all the Friendship is Magic villains, then where's Sunset Shimmer? And those Teenage Dragons from Dragon Quest?"

"You mean the episode The Voice of Reason and TheMysteriousMrEnter didn't like?"

"That's the one."

"I didn't invite them; Sunset Shimmer's a failure and those dragons are just a bunch of dorks."

Gilda smiled and said, "For once, we agree on something."

---

Author's Note: I know Sunset Shimmer turned good, but so did Dartz, so this still works!

---

Meanwhile, in the caves beneath Canterlot Castle

Sunset Shimmer in her pony form paced around in a circle as he shouted, "This is an outrage! Queen Chrysalis is having an evil council meeting, and we're not invited! They've even got free cupcakes, the jerks!"

"That Chrysalis is such a and old hag!" Garble said.

"Cripes, man. Shave my hair and call me Spyro! Would ya!" the tall thin purple and yellow dragon said.

"Yeah!" the large brown dragon said.

Sunset Shimmer stomped the ground hard and said, "We're not going to let her get away with this. We'll have our own evil council, and ours will be much better. And we'll have veggie burgers! Veggie burgers are better than cupcakes. Isn't that right, my evil dragon henchmen?"

"Uh. . .hooray?!" Garble said.

"Uh. . .," the brown dragon said.

---

Back in the Everfree Forest...

---

"Come on, one of you villains must have a decent plan to defeat Twilight and her friends!" Chrysalis shouted in frustration.

"Duh, I've got an idea!" the large Diamond Dog said.

"Oh, goody. The big lurching freak job has an idea," Chrysalis said with no enthusiasm at all, "Well, go ahead and sock it to us, big dog.

"Duh, what if we stole their Elements of Harmony while the Princesses are asleep? Then they won't be able to stop us."

"That's the dumbest idea I ever heard! You go to the back of the class!"

"Doh, I'm so stupid..."

"Gems!"

"What is it, puppy dog? Do you have an idea that doesn't involve stealing gems?" Chrysalis said with zero interest.

"Gems. . ."

Gilda suddenly lost her temper. She jumped into the air and roared. "Enough of this!" she shouted, "There's only one way to truly defeat those six uncool losers, and I know what it is!"

"For the last time, we're not killing them!" Chrysalis shouted back, "Even if we did, The Hub would just censor it!"

"We're not going to kill them," Gilda said simply.

"Then tell us, G, what shall we do?" Chrysalis said with interest.

"Don't call me G!"

"What's wrong, missing Rainbow Crash?" Chrysalis mocked as she transformed into a perfect copy of Rainbow Dash.

"I told you not to change into Rainbow Dash around me!" Gilda shouted.

Chrysalis turned back and said, "Well, you're asking for it. You're like a sandwich made from inedible bread. You still care for your friend inside."

"Drop it, okay! and just listen to me!" Gilda said in frustraiont, "The only way to defeat them is to bribe Derpy Hooves to junk their mailboxes!"

"Junk their what?" Chrysalis said slowly.

"Their mailboxes," Gilda said with a malicious grin on her beak, "If we give Derpy enough muffins, she'll deliver hundreds of pieces of junk mail to their mailboxes, and then they'll all have to surrender to our superior might!"

Chrysalis taped a hoof to her chin, and then she smiled broadly and said, "That does actually sound like a good idea. It's very evil! I like it! Now, let's go defeat Twilight Sparkle and her friends once and for all!"

"Hey, I didn't get to say anything!" the medium Diamond Dog complained.

"Save it for the next meeting," Chrysalis said.

The giant Timberwolf muttered darkly.

"You said it, Timberwolf," the Chrysalis remarked.

---

Meanwhile, beneath Canterlot Castle. .

---

"And so, in order to defeat Trixie, we'll bribe Derpy Hooves into junking her mailbox!" Sunset Shimmer said.

"Great idea, ma'am!" Garble said.

"Well, what do ya bloomin' know, the pony had a good idea. Would ya!"

"Uhh. Yeah. . ."

Sunset Shimmer face hoofed. "I'm surrounded by idiots. . ."

The End

Comments

[MsIkarishipper]

XD Hilarious! Please keep going!

[Bronyzilla]

MEANWHILE, AT TRIXE'S COUNCIL OF DOOM.

[Crushric]

Ha! I got a good laugh out of this. Why does it say complete? There's no point in tracking if the story says complete. I'd very much like for this to continue but whatever, five stars for you and I'll be on my merry way.

[FearoftheDark]

Definitely continue. Made a profile just to say so. You could mimic all of the meetings. there's been like five or something. Looking forward to it. Shammity sham sham. Sham!

[PaulRap Raptor]

Interesting idea. I think you should make more.

[HeatherIsBestPlayer]

You got this idea from my Princess Luna's Evil Council video [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TLtzSYhysY&feature=channel_video_title] didn't you. I know you did because of the comments you left on the video.
Anyway, I really like this fic and I hope you will be doing more.

[L4]

[ImRaidAccount]

Luna: Screw the rules, I have royal blood.

[Starlight Nova]

Why is this story on hiatus?