"I'm looking after you now, Twilight, I'm taking care of you... You're mine."
When Twilight is seriously injured, Fluttershy takes her in to take care of her. But beneath the surface lies a darker motive behind the pegasus' actions.
Chapters (4)
pyromANarchist
Joined 3rd Feb, 2013 ·
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*You're
"Your" is possessive. "You're" is a contraction.
"Take me to your leader."
"I know you're in there."
Interesting take, I look forward to see how this plays out, dood.
I don't know how but I think Twilight rubbed me the wrong way when she told Fluttershy that she was a princess when it isn't offical (thoguh technically true)
And I figured her friends would probably understand why Twilight would become a princess (Student to the princess, being groomed to become a princess) instead of thinking that they got the shit end of the stick when it was announced, of course they would be butthurt that Twilight would be handed a crown with little to no effort (other than all the times she helped save equestria with them) but I figured Rarity and Applejack would be more accepting; Dash's butthurt is completely understandable as is Pinkie's.
All in all...I'll keep a eye out on this, dood.
Fluttershy sure has a lot of drugs with the same effect. And why was AJ so mad? She's a humble earth pony, not season 1 Trixie.
I guess this first part for me was about all the brony panic about Twi becoming an Alicorn. Then I thought 'what if the 5 others thought the same' and the idea of this was born. I needed something negative from each of them and yeah they may not be the best reasons but then again, were ours?
PS it's the same drug each time just administered differently
good, tracking this for future!!
I don't know why but I find this funny
Are you by any chance a fan of Stephen King? Your story reminds me of Misery.
Hmm, yes I have heard of that one, a friend recommended it knowing my love of grimdark, but no I haven't read it. From what I've heard they are pretty similar.
i like it but one major plot hole twlights a unicorn why cant she just teleport out ive read this and im sure theirs nothing to say that she cant :L
2118356 At the beginning...yea, I can believe that...but I'm sure the drugs are messing with all that, dood.
Yes that's exactly right!
I do mention it, chapter 1 when she reaches the door, her magic doesn't work due to the drugs. I probably should have made it clearer.
2120300 ahh i must of missed that one bit i am sorry my good sir
No worries mate it happens
Amazing, sad fics usualy depress me but this was a nice exeption, fav by far
Thanks, I'm glad you like it. Wow I'm chuffed! It's comments like that that make writing worthwhile! This is only my second attempt at writing (the first was too painful to mention) and I've got plenty more on the way!
I hope that's not the end.
What do you mean?
I like this idea, but I'd also like to see how Twilight does with rehab (assuming she ever does manages rehab) and how her edicts as a ruler are changed by this.
all this happened just because twilight was going to be an alicorn... reasonable enough.
2289673
Hmm... I never thought about that. That might be interesting to write about in a sequel, but I've got other story ideas that I want to finish first. Quite frankly I'm surprised anyone wants to read more of my stuff! But yea maybe in the future.
2289986
Haha sarcasm? But really, was anyones reaction to that idea 'reasonable'? We were all fine until they announced that and then everyone was screaming they were leaving the fandom and stuff. Reasonable was the last thing on everyones mind!
I think Funinightmare was saying that it's "reasonable enough" to think that it can have happened.
2291835 As Biguo said I was making a sarcastic remark about Fluttershy's reason for everything she did to Twilight. Fluttershy is the most understanding out of the mane six and she resorts to locking up twilight, giving her lots of drugs and breaking her to the point of insanity, all because twilight was becoming a princess
.
That made me laugh
On a serious note the story eventually became it's own thing and turned out to be a lot better than I predicted. I think you wrote Twilight's character change really well.
well done pyromANarchist
Hey mate
You know I'm not a big fan of these kinda stories but I thought id give the first chapter a read and well this is genuinely well written and this is definitely a good idea for a story and the only problem I can see is that it needs an editor or a proofreader just to check some spelling and grammar errors and I'd be happy to do that for you. Also I reckon if you tried something that wasn't grimdark itcould easily be pretty popular and well received by most. This is a great start to the story and your time on fimfic and if you wanna talk send me a message
Ciao.
M.I.E.
2323014
Thank man! Yeah I think I might take up on that offer. Thanks for the support. I'm sure my stories will be a lot better for it too. Yes I will be doing stories with less grimdark but my stories will always have dark elements, because you know that's who I am!
Haha this was very good, though I think I felt more sorrow for Fluttershy than I did for Twilight... But I may have developed Stockholm syndrome while reading this... XD But yes, I think you captured Twilight very well
I am also curious how things happen after all this XD because well a drug addicted princess is a surprising notion.
I liked it! I'd kinda like to see an alternate ending wherein Celestia does find her, but Twilight is so addicted and mentally broken that Celestia uses her 'recovery' as an excuse to keep her confined to her chambers much like Fluttershy did.
2420918 how can you think fluttershy in this fic dying is a bad thing
2600467 I never meant it to say its a "bad" thing. Fluttershy just merely was misunderstood and tried to solve things the only way she could think.
Honestly it seemed to be more of a tragedy for Fluttershy than for Twilight... But that is merely my opinion.
2603004 Well okay but I still see her as a devil in this. No mercy.
I loved this... Its probably one of the best short stories I've read, where I was totally engrossed within not only Twilight's thoughts, but I visualized the scenery, and it appeared so vivid in my mind. Bravo.
2603166 Each to his own haha.
Got here from a little white lie.
Also is this based on misery by Stephen king
?
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/129111/a-little-white-lie
3231980 I think someone mentioned Stephen King before, but no, it's not based on anything really.
It was very interesting, but the ending was a bit too much for me. But that's because I have a thing against cutting and knives and needles, not because of the story. I would have liked to know more about what happened when the others and Princess Celestia had done after Twi was missing for a few days, but not in the story, maybe in an epilogue?
My favorite part was chapter 3. It was fun seeing the story unfold from the journal and not from a narrative perspective. Anyways, good job.
I liked this. You made it seem utterly hopeless for her right until the end.
As for a sequel I'm not sure it would work out. A drug addicted princess who has lost faith in her friends doesn't seem like it would resemble this in tone. It may disappoint compared to this. I'd probably read it anyway though.
There is another option over a sequel though. Adding a little more to the end. I'm not sure if it would be better left to the imagination what happens later though. It's fine as it is aside a handful of errors.