• Member Since 18th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen June 5th

fiendofthet


T

Many ponies in the Equestrian Wasteland aren't as lucky as Littlepip. Here's the story of a few of those ponies.
A gray earth pony in a gray world, Icarus Stone had never really felt all that special. That is, until his parents died. He goes on a quest to find his parents' killer and take revenge. Along the way, he learns some startling facts about himself and the ponies he that have raised him his entire life.

Original "art" by me at my deviantart page: http://fiendofthet.deviantart.com/#/d4pz68y

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 32 )

Seems like a cool story, also I like your writing style. However, it seems to go quite fast, filler can be boring if there is too much, but it is much easier to appreciate a story if it goes a little slower. Overall seems like an awesome first chapter.

I need to read this when I get the chance! This looks like its worth looking at, and even following! I'll have to give you my real opinion when I'm done reading! :twilightsmile:

Ok here we go. *Pops neck*

Well the cover art you have is way way way better!

I spotted no errors in the first chapter at all! The story flowed well, and the dialogue was pretty decent. I love love love the fact your protagonist isn't an ass. I really like that. I also like the way you make his life seem dull, and then colorful when he dreams. I can't really comment on the second chapter (is to sleepy right now) but I can tell you I defiantly like the story above most of the other FoE fictions so far! And I'm not just saying that to be nice!

Now, I won't rate it just yet. I will love to see what happens in the second chapter though! and you really need to keep this up or I will eat you. jk

There are only two things I can complain slightly about. Whenever he narrates the story it almost seems like a DnD game. Like "We make fire just as I eat the pie." words like make and stuff make some sentence seem weird, but its not to bad so don't worry a whole lot about that.

Your writing style is also vey unique, and thats a good thing. The one thing I would recomend will be to space your sentences every now and again. That way this makes it not seem long and boring to read. Now because of the way you wrote this it moves without loosing my attention which I love about this, but if you don't break those sentences up it'll make it look sloppy and thats no good.

Overall I liked it very very very much. I will happily read the next part tomorrow when I find the time!

-Noakwolf

Quote from Fo:E Group comments " Then I get depressed because no one reads my story."
Finish your story and I will read it.
If I deem it satisfactory (or really, really bad) I will drop you a comment.
Until then, goodbye.

*sigh* I was gonna read another FoE story when your story popped up... I guess they can wait.

I read this chapter and it was ARSOME! Chump Puffin is best lab pony. and the password is awesome to! I lolled at it. :rainbow laugh:

Anyway, you need to put a footnote at the bottom and thats it! Look forward to the next chapter!

261170 I second this. Every Fallout Equestria side story needs footnotes. It's pretty much a requirement (actually, surprisingly few have them)

Still, good story. Biologically turned into a plant? I sense a Checkov's perk in development. And I doubt this is the last we seen of Endogen. Keep it up!

Freaking awesome chapter
And I third the 'footnotes would be great' notion going around

263235 261598 261170 Wow thanks all of you. This chapter took a lot of effort and it's really awesome that you guys liked it as much as I did.
As for the foot notes, I was thinking about that and it seems like a good idea. I guess I'll put them in the ones I've already written as well.
Also, I was thinking about whether I should write the increase in stats in the footnotes or just the perks. What do you think?

263999 The deed is done. I have created perks for each chapter. Go back and read them if you'd like.

You forgot one on chapter 1, just saying lol.

I wrote the one for chapter one then forgot to save.
Then I rewrote it and forgot to save again :twilightangry2:

:ajbemused: There try that

Haha, they are great. I love how you don't take it overly seriously. And I agree with noakwolf, just perks is good (not that it matters you already did it)

275121
I'm a little confused on what that is asking. Is it: Are there footnotes? To which my answer is: Yes, I just added them to each chapter, on request, so you'll just have to read them.

What are footnotes? To which my answer is: "Level Up!"

Or is it discontent with my footnotes? To which I just shrug it off. :Whyisn'tthereashruggingpony:

277111
You know the little comments at the end of each chapter that say "Level up, new perk etc." I added them to mine, so read them in the chapter.

Come to think of it, don't you have footnotes in your story? :rainbowhuh:

:facehoof: Ya just had to make an arrow to the knee joke didn't ya.
I had to laugh at the name "Max Fightmaster". The best part is I actually know people named Fightmaster.
It doesn't seem like Ic was grieving much for his family.Ya it's the Wasteland but I figure if you see your parents laid out like that any normal person(or pony) would devolve into a gibberish spewing buffoon. Maybe.
Anyway i'm interested and will enjoy reading it.

Have a great day. :twilightsmile:

They are (wait for it) Mysteries. DUN DUN... DUUUUUNN.
"One more chapter" I said. "It'll be fine" and now it's 4 am. Curse this story for being interesting.:twilightangry2:
Naw just messin' with ya fiend your're good.
And he finally grieves for his folks. Better late than never 'cuz that would mean he's desensitized to the death and if that happens, through a series of bizarre equations, he could become a raider.

I really have to stop checking FiMFiction before going to bed...

The plot thickens! Who is Firesoul? What awaits them in the Stable? What is the thing? And most importantly, what shenanigans will Jet get in to alone in the town? I guess we'll find out!

PS: way to go, you got me to choose this over Anthropology, and I regret nothing!

314993
Wow, more interesting than Anthropology? That might just be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

The only thing I've noticed which I'm not a fan of is the "he replies" "I trot" and such.

"he replied." or even better yet "He replied in a _____ tone" would work a lot better, in my opinion.
If not that, then just "I trotted to" even, would improve the overall quality.
Though don't get me wrong, I like it, I just have a personal thing for those kind've... errors? choices? I don't know which of the two to class it myself.

Will have to read later, is to sleepy right now.

From my vast knowledge of medical practice, I know exactly what to do in a time like this. Flail around like a madmare, until the pain goes away.
This response solves all medical issues. Trust me, I'm a doctor. :pinkiehappy:
It seems at this moment that the ghoul finally realizes that I am there, for her looks at me with those empty holes and whispers in a raspy voice, “3.” *That her should be a he.
:facehoof: Bad one-liners are bad! :facehoof:

I guess this turret has gone bananas...
ON THE MMMMMMOOOOOOONNNNNNNAAAAA BBBBBBEEEEYYYYITCH
The search didn't prove fruitful

All the bad puns and one liners and mysterious apparitions and new characters hitting on Ic.
And his understanding of Stables is completely unparalleled.

good chapter like the Ruby Dwellers sound cool look forwards towards the next chapter :twilightsmile:

938048

Yeah, I know it's been a while, but I got a job so I didn't have quite as much time as I expected. Good to see a few people still remember this little story.

938739

Ever since I read Antipodes, I've been wanting to work with fire ponies. They just are so cool.

191173

I just realized that this comment basically says "cool story bro."
Blew my mind.

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