College Applications Shouldn't Be This Easy!
v1.0
Discord and Cthulhu: College Roommates
Chapter One: College Applications Shouldn’t Be This Easy!
The graduation caps flew high into the air, and the recent graduates of Equestria High beamed with pride. Chrysalis was absolutely stuffed from the love emanating from everypony’s parents. Celestia and Luna searched the crowd for their mother, but didn’t see her; after all, Faust was still very busy shaping the plane of Equestria. Discord didn’t care much if his folks were there or not; he was just celebrating, shooting off fireworks of popcorn and playing a trumpet made of cheese.
As the quartet left the stage, they were approached by a strange cloaked figure. He was a biped like Discord, but had no tail. His dark blue cloak hid all features except his hands. He said, “If I may take a moment of your time, I was wondering if any of you had given any thought to furthering your education after high school.”
The four Equestrians looked at each other, then shook their heads. “We were just planning on helping my mother build this world after today. We were unaware of any other educational opportunities,” Celestia said.
“I figured as such. This plane is rather new and isolated, and it took me three days to find it. I am Jace Beleren, and I represent the prestigious Ravnica Polytechnical Institute. I’ve spoken with the principal of the school, and from what she said about you four, I believe we may have a spot for all of you in this year’s freshman class. It is a college uniquely geared towards teaching young immortals to harness the full potential of their magic. I have information regarding our majors and accreditations right here.” He reached into the folds of his cloak and fished out four thick envelopes. “If you wish to attend, simply fill out the application form at the end and sign your name. We will take care of transportation.”
The four graduates took the envelopes and thanked the man. The mysterious man seemed satisfied and turned to leave.
As he was walking away, he suddenly stopped. “Oh, one more thing,” he said with a much more foreboding tone. “If you do decide to attend, I would strongly advise against failing out. Have a good day.”
Celestia, Luna, Chrysalis, and Discord looked back at the application forms. When they looked up again, the man had disappeared.
The four Equestrians opened the envelopes and viewed the contents. Most of the pages detailed the history of the college and the planes that students usually came from. Most of the planes sounded horrid and war-torn, the city-scape Ravnica was the only exception. The next page was a boring letter written by the headmaster of the school. Only Celestia bothered to read it in its entirety, and she said that it explained that the college wanted them to attend in order to branch out to more peaceful planes. The applications themselves were actually only one page with a list of intended majors to choose from and a line for the applicant’s signature.
Luna was the first to break the silence after everypony had finished reading their packets. “We are unsure of this ‘Ravnica Polytechnical,’ sister. It seems like a dangerous place to go.”
“Well, if Lulu here is hesitant, then it MUST be good. She never has liked the concept of ‘fun,’” Discord snickered.
“What is this ‘fun’ thou speakest of? A meaningless distraction from life’s duties,” Luna calmly said.
“Girls, girls, you’re both pretty! Can we go now?” Chrysalis said impatiently, buzzing around in the air.
Celestia sighed, then said to her sister, “If you wish to stay here and help Mother shape the world without further training, I cannot stop you. However, we three are all going, and Equestria will still be here when we come back.”
Luna pouted, but eventually agreed to come along. They put a checkmark next to their majors, and signed their names. Exactly three seconds after they signed, a swirl of deep blue smoke came out of the applications, enveloped the four immortals, and they disappeared from Equestria.
======
When the smoke cleared, the four Equestrians were sitting in a massive auditorium with several thousand other creatures, and what looked like a superintelligent shade of the color blue. There was a banner hanging over the stage saying “Welcome, Incoming Freshmen!”
A large red dragon stepped up to the podium at the front of the auditorium. He waited for everyone to quiet down, then said, “Ladies, gentlemen, and other unidentified beings: welcome to Ravnica Polytechnical. My name is Niv-Mizzet, and I am the headmaster here. You have all worked incredibly hard to get this far in your academic life, and with a little training, I can predict that many of you will become great mages. Some of you may even be called ‘gods’ by those of a more... mortal persuasion.” A chorus of snickers rose from the crowd of incoming freshmen. “Nevertheless, I must stress to you all that if you don’t apply yourself, you will fail out and won’t be given a way back to your home plane. Ravnica can be a very dangerous place, even for a god. But enough of this. You will all be assigned a roommate. We looked very closely at each of your intended majors and innate abilities in order to pair you all with someone who shares similar talents. The list will be posted just outside the cafeteria, in the student center. Good day to you all.”
The students began filing out of the auditorium in order to find out their roommates, with Luna leading the pack. Soon, the only students left were Chrysalis, Celestia, and Discord. The changeling and the Alicorn were shaking Discord in order to wake him up.
“zzZZzz... Huh?” Discord looked around. “Where did everypony go?”
Celestia and Chrysalis facehoofed, then said, “Come on, sleepyhead. Let’s go find out who our roommates are.” With that, the three left the auditorium and headed to the student center.
======
Discord looked at the dorm assignments, hoping that he would get paired with Celestia. She really does have a prankish streak in her, he thought. I bet we could make such MARVELOUS chaos in the city together! He glanced at Celestia’s name on the list and saw who she was placed with.
“Ra? What kind of a name is that???” Discord asked aloud.
“Discord, dear, weren’t you paying attention? They assigned roommates based on your choice in major, not name,” Celestia said. “Ra is majoring in Solar Metaphysics, like me. Luna got paired with somepony named ‘Epona,’ a major in Lunar Sciences. Chrysalis, you got paired with Venus, an immortal majoring in Practical Love, right?”
“Yep! I’m so excited! I met her, and she said that love is like her special talent! It’s going to so much fun, and she can be the cook!!!” Chrysalis squealed.
Celestia rolled her eyes at the changeling’s enthusiasm for ‘food.’ “Riiiight. Anyways Discord, I’d expect that you’d be similarly paired. What did you decide to major in, again?”
“Applied Chaos Theory,” Discord said. “I suppose that means I have no roommate. All the better for me to practice chaos in my room.”
Celestia looked over the list and smiled. “Well, just because it’s an uncommon major doesn’t mean it’s unique. Take a look for yourself.”
Discord leaned over to read the list. He found only one other freshman majoring in Applied Chaos Theory.
“Cthulhu. What a delightfully chaotic name! I wonder what he’ll look like! Maybe, the head of a fish, the left arm of a spider, the right arm of an ape, a snail’s foot for legs, and the wings of a Harpy! It would be a perfect match for such a name!” Discord was already imagining the wonderful fun he could have with such a being.
“I hate to disappoint you,” a gravelly voice said from behind Celestia, “but it seems my expectations of your appearance missed the mark as well… Discord, was it?”
Chrysalis, Celestia, and Discord turned around. They were met with the sight of a tall, mottled dark green humanoid with a squidlike head and large, leathery wings. His eyes glowed fierce yellow, and his webbed hands and feet ended in sinister talons. Celestia started trembling at his appearance, and Chrysalis transformed into a mouse with an “eep!” and scurried away. Discord, however, chuckled at their reactions.
“Well, at least you know how to make an entrance. Personally, though, I prefer the old ‘Hide in a pane of stained glass’ trick. Gets ‘em every time!” Discord said.
Cthulhu just scoffed. “So, I come here all the way from R’lyeh, to get paired with a melodramatic buffoon. What even are you?”
Without batting an eyelash, Discord responds, “And I come all the way from Equestria to get paired with a short-tempered fish. I’m a delightfully chaotic little bit of everything called a ‘draconequus.’ By the way, what about you, Squiddy? What are you?”
Cthulhu flared his wings and began whipping his tentacles about. He then shouted in a voice powerful enough to rival even the Royal Faustian Voice, “THOU SHALT REFRAIN FROM REFERRING TO ME WITH SUCH A FOOLISH NAME, OAF! THOU AND THINE KIN CAN NE’ER HOPE TO COMPREHEND MINE LINEAGE AND RACE!!!”
“OK, OK! Gosh, don’t give yourself an aneurism or anything. Those are really painful!” Discord said.
If he can muster a tone of voice that rivals my own mother’s, I should probably stay out of his way, Celestia thought. “I-I-I th-think I’ll leave you t-two alone. See you around, Discord,” Celestia said quickly. She then flew off to her dorm.
Discord and Cthulhu just glared at each other. It was going to be a long semester.
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1858859 Aww shit man, really? Women's shorts for only 15$?
Please go off yourself and take the shitty company bot advertising with you.
1858881 Deleted the bot's comment. Do you have any comments on the chapter?
1858925 Naw man. But I have to say, the concept intrigues me. I mean, Discord and Cthulhu as roommates... Dear god man we're all screwed.
1858940 Yeah. This came to me in a random bit of troll logic I had with a friend, where I said that "Discord and Cthulhu must know each other because they were roommates in college, seeing as they both majored in Chaos Theory."
Psst! Author!
Import from gDocs pulls in comments too. Be careful!
Tentative watch.
1858997 oops.
Hermaeus Mora should be the college librarian.
Ok, anypony who wants to suggest a deity to be included in the fic, just give the name, major, and origin (ex Ra, Solar Metaphysics, Egyptian Pantheon)
I am counting the planeswalkers from Magic as deities, as well as a select few others like Niv Mizzet.
I tremble in fear to see the Chaos Theory teacher...
Keep on the good work man!
1861023 Well, how about this guy? wizards.com/mtg/images/daily/stf/stf88_emrakulConcept.jpg
Slenderman/slendermane, Chaos Theory, And the origin is eithe a meme or dreamt up from the darkest of minds
Wait, do the Forerunners from Halo count?
1861256
Yes, I guess that a god of destruction would be a nice cioice
1861997 I suppose so. I have a blog post with a form for various deities/immortals now.
1861987 Don't make me cum, its not a good idea
1861256 who the fack is dis guy
Sheogorath should be a chaos teacher or a student who is good with chaos
1864018 See This blog post for all suggestions.
1864016 Emrakul. A being of ultimate destruction.
1859256 I agree go to his page and then go to his blog and post it
Uhhhh so much frustration I can't come up with any more Ideas fffffuuuu i,m so mad right now i could scream
ahhhhhhhh 
yay
1864554 These are very good already. I have just a few points, and remember: just because Discord and Cthulhu are the only freshmen majoring in Chaos Theory, it doesn't mean that they are the only ones in the school.
1866846 I could have swore I put some in there with chaos theory hmm oh and fenrisulphur is a literal wolf so is his sister liuva
GOOD MORNING I AM HERE FROM THE AUTHORS HELPING AUTHORS GROUP AND I DECIDED TO REVIEW YOUR STORY YAY
Name of Story: Discord and Cthulhu, College Roommates.
Grammar score: 7/10.
Pros:
Your idea is brilliant.
Luna. Just Luna.
You're doing a good job of making them stay in character.
Cons:
Your paragraphs are a bit short.
You should try to work on not 'rushing' through your story. Make it flow, but not too fast.
Try and give a little more background and description.
Notes:
This could be a really great fic, and you seem to know what you're doing, but it would help if you paced yourself a little. Give a little more description, make me feel like I'm actually there.
Hello there, this review is brought to you by the Authors Helping Authors group!
[~]Discord and Cthulhu, College Roommates.
Grammar score: 8/10.
Pros:
-Nice starting point to go off of; I really like the idea of an academy for Gods
-All characters seem in character for the most part
-No real grammatical issues that really ruin the story
Cons:
-Just be cautious about working with Gods and such (AKA who's more OP than the other; make sure there's balance!)
-Nothing else really wrong other than that warning moving forward (maybe some capitalization errors I saw)
Notes: So I'm not knowledgeable about Magic: The Gathering, so I didn't get that many references. But, I'm sure other people will and just make sure you have your facts straight so people don't assault you with being wrong. Like I said, the idea for having a school for Gods seems very fun and different. You can definitely do a lot with this and I hope you succeed.
If this review was helpful then I am happy, if not...well...never mind. If you have the time, please check out my story, One Shot, One Chance, when you have the time. I'd greatly appreciate any feedback you would have. Thanks in advance
-
1907066 Thank you for the review. I'm now considering reworking and expanding this chapter before continuing the next one. This will probably include mention of a sort of magic dampener system to force an upper limit to all of the students' powers, except for approved areas and activities.
Right now, I'm not considering making the backstories of the MtG planes very important, so the only thing to worry about is what the MtG characters look like and what sort of magic they can do. Most of the characters won't be from MtG except for the teachers, so don't worry!
1916514 Thanks!
1861997 Yes.
Discord and Cthulhu, College Roommates.
Grammar score: 8/10.
Pros: Idea is original and funny.
Characters in in character.
Cons: Paragraphs are short.
More descriptions.
Pacing seems to be off slightly
Notes:
This, I reckon, will become very popular. If you can fix the mistakes pointed out by me and other commenters then this story will become awesome.
Name of Story: Discord and Cthulhu, College Roommates.
Grammar score: 7/10.
Pros: Your idea is great and original
Characters are in character.
Cons: Short paragraphs. It would help if they were a bit longer.
It needs more descriptions.
Notes: This is a great idea but it's being dragged down by the cons mentioned by me and other members. This story has great potential and I shall be following this very closely.
1941949>>1942006 Working on a rewrite which will add more description, exposition, and change the 'meeting Cthulhu' scene.
i saw what you did there. Mega Mind FTW
Just so everyone knows, it isn't dead.
still isn't dead.
On behalf of Authors Helping Authors,
Name of Story: Discord and Cthulhu, College Roommates.
Grammar score: 8/10.
Pros: I love your premise.
The dialogue was very well written.
Discord's acts of chaos were entertaining.
Cons: I think a little bit of physical description would have helped with the college in particular.
I don't think Cthulu yelling in all caps was necessary to convey his volume.
Notes: It has a wonderful premise. For the most part I love your conservation of detail, but I think having a physical description of the college would be helpful.
Discord: Izzet
Celestia: Azorius
Luna: Dimir
Cadance: Selesnya
3262116 I honestly wasn't even considering putting them in guilds, but that's a very good idea! It'll definitely have to come later, though, since it's their first year. They could join as an extracurricular, though.
Why do these forms have to be this unnecessary? My favorite part is having to put the name, as if the reader forgot what he was reading on the way down here.
This review is brought to you on behalf of the group: Authors Helping Authors
Name of Story: Discord and Cthulhu: College Roommates
Grammar score out of 10: 8
Pros:
The characters have a believable chemistry.
Comedy is simplistic but not boring.
The story is actually interesting if nothing else.
Cons:
Not random enough to really warrant the "Random" tag. If you're gonna do it, go all out.
Flow is bizarre. It goes by too fast that the beginnings of some scenes don't imprint as I needed to spend it trying to figure out where the story is now.
Introducing too many different characters in too short a span of time. You need to work slowly and pace out the character introductions. This just means that I think Cthulhu should have came in later instead of bringing him in right away. The rest are... meh.
Notes Section:
I enjoyed myself and aside from some really weird choices that I really couldn't list as cons, (like why Faust hadn't finished the world before sticking a high school on it.) This story is good and I look forward to see how it goes.
Enjoy your review! Please help me out by looking at my story: The Storm is Here!
Cool to chaotic beings one of a race as old as time itself and one born of chaotic beings or cheese cheese is chaotic
This is a review courtesy of Authors Helping Authors. This being my first review, ever, I hope it is helpful.
Name of Story: Discord and Cthulhu, College Roommates.
Grammar score: 8/10.
Pros:
Excellent concept, love the idea.
For a short, it was rather well done and kept my interest.
The characterization was well done, as was the byplay between the characters.
Cons:
Needs bit more description of location and surroundings, perhaps not as lengthy as a Lovecraft narrative, but just enough for the reader to picture where the story is taking place (both locations may not be familiar to the reader. The high school, because it's a original concept. The college and surrounding lands, because they may not be familiar with current CTG:CCG).
I love the concept and look forward to a more fleshed out completed story. I want to follow the story fully down the rabbit hole. I was drawn to your story because the thought of combining lovecraft's works and the lore of MLP: FIM was intriguing to me. Unfortunately I haven't played or kept up with CTG since college, so I don't get the MAGIC references. As I mentioned a description of the Ravnica realm and the Polytechnical Institute would be welcomed. If this was helpful please let me know your thoughts on my story Innocence Lost And Found.
Interesting idea, would like to see more but story has been dead for almost 11 years.