IV - Blue Monday
My eyes were closed and my ears were perked up, waiting to hear a neverending barrage of rightful recriminations. But nothing came, and everything was silent. I forced my eyes open and saw that Cheerilee, Twilight Sparkle, everything was frozen. I got up slowly, with my legs still trembling from the shock. I looked at the furious earth pony mare that was now yelling at the floor: why was she still here? From the bits and pieces she got from the conversation he eavesdropped, she needed to give something back to Sparkle, probably a book, since he heard she was the town librarian. If Cheerilee was inside the school, in the teacher’s office, that meant that she was-
“The teacher. Took you long enough, m’boy.” Discord snickered a bit.
“Excuse me if I can’t read minds like you. Anyway, thanks for the help…” I answered with sheepish smile.
“No biggie. But we still have a problem. The thing is, she won’t let you see any of the children, since she’s so mad at you and probably will want to know where in Tartarus have you been for two years. But we have no time for that. You see, doing all this time stopping it’s not easy. Time is like a series of domino tiles. When you tip one, the others fall right after. To stop time I have removed several tiles from the future and put them here, to make the current chain longer, hence slowing everything down. But, the thing is, I can’t put them back, once you take a tile, it’s gone for good. So, when the falling chain reaction will reach the point from where I got the tiles, some won’t be there, and the sequence will skip and lag badly. It’s not something that you or ponies can realize, but beings with great magical powers that are attuned to natural constants, like me and the Princesses, will realize it. Also, it’s not something ponies can do. Usually, when I need to freeze time, I take tiles from a really distant point, like hundreds of thousands of years in the future. But I’m still frozen in stone and my powers are severely diminished, so I couldn’t go much further in the timeline…”
So, he was severely underpowered. It wasn’t something I hadn’t took into consideration for a long time, but it felt like his unbelievable powers, even weakened, would still be more than enough. But his tone wasn’t flamboyant and giddy, so I knew I wasn’t about to hear good news. I took a long breath and asked:
“How much?”
“I could only take tiles from twelve hours from now. If we aren’t out Ponyville by then, they will find us.” He answered plainly.
“Then why did you stop time in the first place? We wouldn’t be in this situation if you didn’t do it!” I said angrily, stomping my hoof down in rage.
“Ehi, ehi, I did it for the group ya know! I probed her mind while you were eavesdropping, and the fillies we’re looking for are already home! There’s no way she would have let you waltz in here after two years and then just gave you the addresses of two fillies she knows for sure don’t even know who you are!”
He was making sense. There’s no way she would have let me know addresses and names of two fillies she knew for sure they weren’t related to me (since I was an orphan), especially after everything. It would have slowed us down, and Cherilee would have probably reported me to the authorities, something I couldn’t afford to let happen. He was, on all accounts, perfectly right.
“Fine, I get it. So, what do we do now? Time’s frozen, but as soon as it starts to flow again, it’ll be over!” I said, pointing the screaming mare in front of me.
“It’s simple. We erase her memory, and Sparkle’s. It’s selective, it will be a doozy.” He answered, ending the sentence with a playful giggle.
“Erase her memory? But…”
“Look, it’s not like you actually love her anymore, right? Water under the bridge, right? It’s all in the past, now you live in the future, you live for the future of this nation! She didn’t tried to look for you, to find you! She didn’t care about you, nor did Sparkle when she made up lies about you to get you expelled, so why are you so hesitant?”
Why… She didn’t look for me, she didn’t even try. I knew I couldn’t relay on anybody, they were all poisoned by them. It was obvious that my only ally and friend was Discord. But it wasn’t about erasing her memory, it was about a fundamental concept.
I sighed and massaged my head, for it was throbbing madly.
“It’s… We’re not giving them a choice. I’m not like the Princesses, I don’t want anyone to be forced to anything, including selective amnesia.” I answered wearily.
He scoffed and laughed heartily, like everything I had just said was just a really funny joke.
“You really like this choice thingy, uh? I’m all for freedom, as it comes with chaos, but this isn’t the time for hypothesis and theory, it’s about action. We either erase her memory, or we give up on Windigoes. And we can’t win without them. We cannot push our weight without them, at least until I am out of the cage. And if they capture you, I don’t know what they’ll do to you. Usually Celestia and Luna are really creative with their punishments. I wouldn’t stick around to find out.”
What was it going to be? I didn’t have much time to decide, and Discord’s stringent answer only made things worse. I looked up to face Cherilee and Sparkle. A choice. I was going to give them a choice, just not right know. A necessary sacrifice. No, I shouldn’t even be thinking about this, it’s about something more important.
Something that can’t be stopped.
“Do it.”
A form slithered out from a shadow, right in front of me: a tall and thin trail of smoke that was randomly streaked with lightning. It curved and crept up like a black, gigantic worm. I recoiled, and shouted in surprise, but the scream died in my throat. I scuttled back to the wall in pure fear, and a voice hissed in my head. It was Discord’s, but it sounded hoarse and without the usual vibrant tone. Actually, it was like a snake talking through a windy tunnel:
“Stay calm. It’s me. I just need to materialize a bit to do this spell.” He assured me. I realized my flank was pressed tightly against the wall, and that I had stopped moving ever so lightly. I breathed and asked slowly, still surprised by the spectacle:
“That doesn’t look like you at all.” I pointed my hoof at the black smoke trail that danced in front of me.
“The form I have to use with ponies is their visual representation of chaos and disorder, a chimera, or a draconequus, as they call it now. Other species see me in a different way and in a different light. This form is simple and easier ”
“Exactly what species sees you as a coil of black smoke?” I asked, curious about what kind of culture would think of Discord in such a strikingly odd way.
“They aren’t around anymore. Now, I need you to be silent, this spell requires a lot of concentration.”
The smoke trail dashed forward and engulfed them both in a black cloud. I could hear strange, buzzing noises coming from inside, but I wasn’t going to find out what the causes for them were.
The brief exchanges I just had seemed oddly concise and serious. Discord always had the same bubbly and sardonic attitude toward everything, but his answers seemed different from usual. Like he was a different person entirely. Maybe-
[b]“It’s done”
His voice interrupted my train of thoughts, and I saw that he had disappeared, and the everything was slowly starting to move again, like a flame slowly but surely burning a match.
“Listen to me: I’ve removed all the memories about you that were in Cheerilee’s mind, plus her outburst and this first chit chat from Sparkle’s memory. Now, since I was there, I also implanted a small suggestion. This morning Twilight Sparkle remembered suddenly that she received a simple missive from Canterlot’s Board of Cultural Preservation: an inspector, namely you, is coming to check up on the Spring Bloom festivity that’s coming around right around tonight to see if it’s worth preserving in the Royal Archives. The entire town will be there, and there is a tournament for foals. If we are lucky, our two lucky guesses will be there and Sparkle will let us talk to them before the 7-legged race starts. Just stay cool and play your cards right and we’re going to get out of here before either Celestia or Luna can crack down on us. And SMILE! TA-TA!”
Everything just… I guess I can’t say it any other, hiccupped, and abruptly, I was in the same scared, supine position, and Cherilee was still yelling at me. Of course, she stopped mid-sentence.
“NOT EVEN A- Oh my, what happened?” She looked at me with a confused expression that swiftly turned into a crimson display of embarrassment.
“I’m so sorry, but at risk of sounding rude, do I know you?” She asked, still flushed and embarrassed for the unusual display even she didn’t know the cause of.
Three years of relationship had just disappeared in a flash of black smoke. She didn’t remember about me, just like Discord said. Who I had now to look to? A deranged god that I couldn’t trust in the least? A mare I just met the two days before and just barely chit chatted with? I had no one in the world to share my doubts with, no one to come back to when and if all of this was going to end in our… my favor. I wanted to just touch her, tell her everything. Just two days and I was already cracking under the pressure. I knew Discord knew, and it didn’t help. The feeling that your thoughts weren’t just your own anymore was unnerving. Maybe, I thought, I could tell her everything. Maybe she’d help me…
Where were she when you needed her the most? When you were lying in the streets, famished and dirty and homeless? She was sleeping in a comfy bed, calmly, without even giving as much as a thought to you. Where were you? Why didn’t you call her? She didn’t care. The thing is, no one cares about you. But that’s okay, that’s okay! Because you don’t care about them either, do you? Was there ever someone for you when you needed?
No, there wasn’t.
Oh yeah? And how you faced every trouble and obstacle in your life until now?
Alone.
See? You don’t need any of them, you are self-sufficient. Weak and unreliable, prone to contradictions, that’s how ponies are. But you are better than them. You tasted bitterness, and despair, and poverty. In this utopia, the only one who had to suffer, just because he wanted freedom for his kind, was you. Now you tell me if that seems fair. The way I see this, it’s just that you’re needed, because they can’t take care of themselves. Just like a good parent, you show them the way to emotional autarchy, so that they don’t have to depend on two princesses bar goddesses anymore. They can be free. But sometimes, you have to lie to kids, you let them believe that Smart Cookie and Private Pansy are real for just a little longer.
I just want what is best for them! But it’s just so hard, and I have accomplished so little. How could I do this? How could I just go against everything I think is good and ethical? Lying, deceiving, manipulating memories, I couldn’t just flip a switch and turn into a deceptive scumbag!
Oh, please. Of course you can. You just need to look at them. Look at those innocent, carefree eyes. Can you see how much it hurts to see their ignorance and unawareness? It’s the bane of parents to see the purity, that nagging feeling that they don’t know anything, that they can enjoy freely their life while you have to worry, while you have to suffer for them.
Look at those eyes and tell me again you can’t lie straight to her face.
“Actually, I’m here to see Miss Sparkle, if she still remembers about me…”
“Of course, of course! Swift Thought, right? I knew a pony of your would find a job right away in a city like Canterlot! I take it you’re here to…”
“Assert the cultural relevance of the Spring Blossom Holiday, yes. I was redirected here by a kind earth pony down at the market. She told me to look for Miss Cheerilee’s school, and I suppose you are that fabled Miss?”
“Oh my, you flatter me. So you are here to “assert the cultural relevance” of our small holiday?”
“Yes, the Canterlot’s Board of Cultural Preservation has recently taken an interest in these rural festivities, and since I’m a historian, I’m here to check out on them. I know this is sudden, Miss Cheerilee, but reliable sources have told me that there is also the active presence of foals in this holiday. I would like very much if I could speak to the precious little things before the race, just to hear from them what they really think about all this quaint shindig.”
“Why, yes of course, it would be my pleasure and the kids’ to help an Inspector from Canterlot!”
“Then, I’m sorry, but I have to take my leave, I have pressing matters before I attend to this momentous occasion! Ladies, I bid you goodbye!”
“Swift Thought, don’t dress too fancy!”
“Why’s that?”
“I’m sure my friend Pinkie will catch word that there’s a new pony in town, and she’ll certainly want to throw you a party! And trust me when I say her parties are something to behold and not for the faint-hearted.”
“Well, in that case I’ll be sure to be ready to taste the Ponyville hospitality!”
I smiled on my way out, even when they thought I couldn’t hear them.
“Twilight, do you know that charming stallion?”
“We were just classmates at the Royal University, I remembered him much more abrasive though…”
“You mean you never gave a thought about him? He’s such a looker! I wish I had-”
See?
That wasn’t so hard, right?
“Ok, one to ten, turning a rock into a singing rooster!” I asked merrily, while slumping on a bench in some quaint little park near the town square.
“I’d say a seven, eight top for the creative effort” Discord answered like I could picture a smirk on his nonexistent mismatched face.
“What have you done that was so much more chaotic that turning a rock into a rooster?” I said with a twinge of challenge in my voice.
“Oh m’boy, you are in for a TREAT. You see, there was this one time when- Ehi, ehi, don’t you dare go into a reverie while I’m talking to yo-“
But it was too late, for my mind was already crossing the boundaries of Discord’s lame reminisced shenanigans and was fixated on a sight I had forgotten in just a day’s absence. Those beautiful magenta eyes that looked like endless purple seas, the tasteful gray coat and smooth and silky looking pink mane!
“Eww, you’re starting to sound like a creep!”
It was that wonderful waitress, Inkie Pie. I got up and rushed forward to greet her. She seems lost in some deep thoughts, but as soon as her ears perked and her eyes turned to face me, a wonderful smile graced her muzzle.
“You know, you’re still in time to dump her and listen to a tragic story of forbidden love between a glass with a hole in it and sentient talking water. Not even going to answer me, right? Yeah, don’t mind this old man trying to pass his wisdom onto the younger generations!”
She waved at me, and I did the same, before stopping my light trotting right in front of her to greet her.
“Inkie! Such a pleasure to see you again” I said, smiling like an idiot.
“Feeling the same, Mister Thought. I thought you said you were staying in Ponyville just for the night?” She asked, still blushing a bit like our last encounter and avoiding eye contact.
“Just call me Swift… I actually miscalculated my day of arrival. I’m here for something Spring Bloom related, and that’s not happening until tonight. How about you, have you been able to meet up with your sister?” I asked, genuinely curious about her happenings.
“Oh yes. Pinkie is living with a wonderful couple near the market, and she said they allowed me to stay as long as I need to find another job! But… I couldn’t have done it without your help. Thank you…. Swift”
Her magenta pools were finally locked mine as she smiled again, and it wasn’t purely for show, but a sincere show of gratitude. A mad, stupid idea appeared like a lightning through my brain, and it got the attention of Discord that up till that every moment had been silent.
“Don’t Swiftie, we don’t have the time!”
“Say, you have anything planned for tonight?” I asked coyly. Her graceful smile turned almost instantly in a confused expression. I feared for the worst.
“Tonight?” She asked slowly. “Uhm… Why not?” She said with a small smile.
It felt nice not being rejected, at least this one time. I managed not to just start crying right there and said in a slow, controlled manner.
“Fantastic. How about we meet around 9 PM, in front of the inn?” I said, trying to keep my suave self afloat. It was hard to do when she kept staring at me with those beautiful eyes. They felt like they bore a hole through my skull, with a candy-cane drill sprinkled with happiness. Her mouth started moving, and it felt like eons had passed, eroding the very sands of time, before she finally said “Yes, sure. I’ll see you there, bye!” waved at me and happily trotted away.
“Eroding the very sands of time? Just what in Tartarus is your problem, Swift? Did you leave your ‘love means never having to say you’re sorry’ at home? I think I’m going to gag. And after I said not once, twice, but three times that we’re short on time! How do you expect to go on a date with her when we have to the Windigoes? The Windigoes, Swiftie, THE WINDIGOES!”
Had he always been this annoying?
“Just relax, ok? I’m said 9 PM for a reason: I get to the festival at 8, find the two foals we’re looking for, you convince them to join our side for 8.45, I go back to the Inn to pick up my beautiful date, spend a wonderful evening talking and perhaps something more, then tomorrow we just roll out of town at daybreak. Simple, easy, perfect.”I said while nodding convincingly. The evening was already showing itself in my head, a torrent of tender, sweet moments with Inkie.
“You’re really confident in your negotiation skills, m’boy. Do you really think you’re going to convince Achrann and Eagla to join us in just 45 minutes?”
“What? You’re the god here, I’m just a lowly mortal! You even said that you and Eagle were an item eons ago!”
“Yeah… About that… In my defense, the Dragon Goddess of Fertility can be veeeeery enticing, and Eagla may or may have not found me with her doing… you know… on an altar. Her altar. In her sacred city. In her most hallowed day. I swear it wasn’t intentional!”
Deep breaths, I repeated to myself. Deep, long breaths. I had signed up for this. I knew the risks. I knew what I was getting in my head: a crazy chaos god who happens to be a compulsive liar. It was all part of the game, I said to myself. You’re going to be fine, I said. Just leave Discord out of the equation, mention him en passant and you’ll be fine. Someone noticed my distraught face and my poorly attempt at not hyperventilating, because I felt a gentle voice and a light touch pushing me towards a bench in the park.
“You all right? You look a little pale, mister. Stay here and I’ll call some help.”
Discord was still blabbering away, muffled chatter that couldn’t possibly assuage my fears. I was supposed to convince the most hateful and spiteful creatures in existence to work for me. And all in a couple of minutes. It took me a while to mentally process everything I was supposed to do, and how exactly could you use the task I was just given by the Chaos God as the new definition of ‘straight up impossible’, but after a couple of minutes I thought I had finally calmed down. That’s when a flyer smacked right on my muzzle. On it there a was stylized drawing of a blue alicorn, and it read:
GREETINGS DEAREST SUBJECTS
‘TIS WITH GREAT JOY THAT WE, PRINCESS LUNA
DECIDE TO OFFICIALLY ENDORSE THE SPRING BLOOM FESTIVITY OF THE QUAINT PONYVILLE
WE WILL BE MAKING AN APPEARANCE AS SOON AS THE CELEBRATIONS BEGIN AND WE’RE
SUR-
THOMF
“Swiftie? Swiftie? Oh dear, I think he just passed out.”
Duibhne was happy, she truly was. Chagan always said to never desire more than your lot in life, and she was perfectly happy with being a scavenger. The village loved their scavengers, they were the ones that brought back the relics of the Arkhé, and even if Chagan was the official shaman, without sacred materials he was as powerless as the next mundane pony when it came to the Arkhé. So, Duibhne was content with her fate, satisfied with the task that was weighing on her back, and relieved that she was capable of living up to the expectations of her tribe. As she trotted down the trodden mud path, passing by the crude huts that they managed to build with their mouths and hooves, and over to the beach, where the sand was caressing her hooves and the sun was setting, bathing in an incandescent red hue. She slowly walked up to the water, that kept going forward and backward, in a sweet motion that hypnotized and entranced her. That’s when she heard a familiar voice calling her:
“Duibhne! Duibhne!” The voice was getting nearer, and was carrying an impatient but eager feel.
“I’m here, Daron!” The mare turned around to wave at a slender stallion that was running towards her. She smiled at the sight of her companion huffing to reach her while his hooves were sinking in the silky white sand. He finally reached her, stopped, and tried to regain a composure, suppressing his own ragged breathing scheme.
“Chagan has begun the divination with the last relic you brought from the Sacred Grounds! You surely don’t want to miss it, right?” He asked her expectantly.
She got closer and nuzzled him sweetly on the cheek, then smiled with a radiance that rivaled that of the setting sun.
“I wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world, my love. Let’s go!” And they started trotting towards the biggest and flashiest hut of the village: it was right at the center of the clearing, and it was draped with red and black patches of silk, as it was custom when the shaman was in deep divination, to speak with the Arkhé. A small crowd had already gathered outside, but they respectfully made way to the scavenger of the village and her companion when they saw them. They entered just to see an old unicorn stallion, with an incredibly long beard but eyes as lively and luminous as stars intently staring on a black piece of godly material, shaped at an angle. The same Duibhne remembered finding in the Sacred Grounds. He darted up when he heard the ponies inside making space for the couple, and his wrinkly muzzle was adorned with a warm smile.
“Duibhne, Daron! Such a pleasure to see you! Come, come, it’s your merit only if we have access to such holy artifacts! I was just beginning the divination, please, take a sit.” He gestured to two free cushions he probably placed for them in advance. The two sat down and waited for the magic to kick in.
Chagan picked up the relic with his telekinesis and inspected it thoroughly with his twinkling eyes, and prodded every surface with his magic grip-
A loud noise muted everything, and a flash blinded everyone. Chagan was on the ground and there was blood on the floor and flowing out of the wound that had just appeared on the left foreleg he was now desperately clutching. Silence fell into the room like a woolen cape, muffling everything.
Before Duibhne and Daron could get up to help him, he shot a look of hate and contempt to the mare, and yelled at the top of his lungs:
“YOU TRAITOR! You didn’t bring us a most sacred relic, but a tool of the Dark One! You struck a deal with him, to kill me and then take my place as the head shaman of this village!” He tried to stomp his hoof down in rage, only to feel a bolt of pain through his foreleg.
Duibhne bolted up and so did Daron, trying to defend her lover:
“Chagan, I would never! I-I d-don’t know how it happened, but it was in the Sacred Grounds! It is a relic!”. Could she really have picked up a Zaban, a demonic artifact? She didn’t remember anything that felt suspicious about those Sacred Grounds: they were the same she always went when looking for relics.
“Yeah Shaman, Duibhne would never do something so devious and evil! You’ve known her for so many years-“Daron tried to speak for the now stunned mare, but Chagan interrupted him.
“ENOUGH! She’s the Scavenger, she’s the next in line to be shaman, she just couldn’t wait! You all saw what happened! A relic from the Arkhé would never hurt a pony, much less a shaman! Guards, restrain her!” He yelled at the two hulking unicorn stallions beside him, who immediately incased Duibhne in a vice magical grip she couldn’t hope to break. Daron tried to stop them and lunged at the two unicorns, but was immediately tackled down by another earth pony that appeared from behind a curtain. He kept thrashing and screaming that she was innocent, that he wanted to take her place, that it was his fault, but Chagan eyes were fixated upon the calm-looking mare.
Duibhne knew what awaited her for bringing something that was made by the Dark one. The worst punishment imaginable. Yet, she was perfectly calm on the outside. A quiet chaos stirred inside her. The certainty of the punishment she was about to receive was strangely comforting, in some way. While she was dragged out by the magical grip, through a deafening silence, and storms of ponies she had known for all her life, ponies that wouldn’t even dare to raise a word in her defense, she turned her head to face her love one last time and heard him say: “STOP IT SHE’S PREGNA-“ before the thick, festive red cloth cut his voice off and hid his desperate face from her sight, a face she never saw again.
The boat is sinking, a whale of timber descending into the darkness of the ocean. There’s a hole in the hull, and it’s painful to see: it’s an open wound spewing forth torrents of black, cold, salty blood. She was sleeping in the only cabin when he heard a screech of wood against stone, and it shook everything. It wasn’t even a real boat, just a conical platform that caressed the sea and slowly drifted under the scorching sun and the uncaring moon for endless months. Those months piled up like rocks in an avalanche, and invested her slowly and painfully, crushing every limb in her body and her very soul. She didn’t even remember why she was here, going on about on the sea: there was a village, long ago, and huts. It was peaceful, and dull, and every day was the same as the one that came before. Then, something happened, and it was gone. There were screams, someone grabbed her and judged her, for crimes she didn’t remember, she was shoved, and pushed, and pointed at, and she was wished death, slow and painful, and now there was the boat. She felt like the only thing really important was the boat, now. Her crime, whatever it was, seemed something that happened in another century, to another mare, condemned too long ago. She remembered only bits and pieces, words that she couldn’t even understand, “everlasting”, “curse”, “life”. What it meant? Life was the boat, and the sun shining above, and the moon and the stars. She liked the sun the best, it was always warm for her, and she thanked it every day. There was water, plenty to drink, all around her. And she didn’t feel hungry, never. There was always something to do while on the boat: stare at the waves, splash her hooves, and look at the sun. It was always a pity when it dived under the horizon and disappeared under the everlasting sea, showering it with golden tints of orange and lily. The sun was truly the greatest, most outstanding work of the gods: it was always tepid, hugging her body in a sweet embrace of heat. A titanic friendly eye always overlooking her. She wanted it, all for herself. She wanted to ask the goddess of the sun to give it to her, but she was silent to her prayers.
Now the water is touching her hooves, and her belly. She hears a kick from her inflated abdomen; it’s awake. It’s kicking her from the inside. She wake up, and it’s night, and the cold blood of the sea is investing her, and making her dizzy. The water was rushing in, covering her drifting abode of wood in darkness and freeze. She scrambled about, panicked, trying to find a way to seal the hole, the open wound festering her moving life. The broken timber wouldn’t stop the water, it was too big. There was a piece of something, round and jagged at the side. It was sharp, and cold, and lifeless. It didn’t feel like wood, and was embedded in the hole, like a knife deep into open, bleeding flesh. She realized this piece of strange shiny coldness was what caused the hull to breach: without thinking straight, she hurled it out, and looked at it, while the boat slowly was slowly sinking in the ocean. There were strange marks, strange signs she remembered: the signs of the gods, apocripha. She forced herself to remember how to interpret them: there was someone in her memory telling her about how the gods spelled words with signs that meant sounds, and those sounds were organized and studied by the shaman. He knew how to talk to the gods, how to unlock the forgotten knowledge of the relics that were scattered around the village. On the piece of godly origin (evidently, it was a material so shiny and hard she couldn’t think any other apart from the gods could have made one) there was impressed something in ruined, scraped letters:
children and fools, they killed and feasted on
the cattle of Lord Hêlios, the Sun,
and he who moves all day through the celestial orb
took from their eyes the dawn of their return. . . .
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Holy shit dude.
Fiiiiiinally!
Are the personalities of Swift and Discord beggining to mix, or is merely the Chaos God influencing the protagonist to do the right(wrong) thing?
3523170
It was just a formatting error, but I'll take that!
Jk, you'll have to wait and see. Hopefully not another year :3
3523304
I think is better that way. After all, Discord loves mind games.
3523315
Discord? Mind games? Why, that is just preposterous! Next thing you'll be telling is that Swift Thought is actually the-
I like that you actually like this fic enough to think about possible theories, but you'll never get a single hint from me. (spoiler, it's not a formatting error)
3523809
images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130901013320/epicrapbattlesofhistory/images/6/61/DAMMIT..gif
3523304
Haven't read this yet. Just wanted to point this out.
orig11.deviantart.net/ae8e/f/2009/290/8/9/are_you_dead_yet___collab__by_ls_mercernary.png
I like to imagine that this is what happened to you.
img.memecdn.com/the-smurfing-dead_o_3471167.jpg
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Chapter V is actually half done but it's so hot in here that it's hard to find that stimulus to finish it.
Interesting adaptation of AG to the MLP setting. Pity you had to go the old "Celestia and Luna are evil frauds" route and impugn the canon characters to make it work, though. Though at least with Twilight it's something from her ice queen days that she regrets, and would regret even more if she had any inkling how much of an effect it had on Swift- basically an early version of "Amending Fences".