Please
The morning sun shone brightly on the windows of the Apple farmer's residence. Applejack slowly opened her eyes, climbed down the bed and stretched her limbs with a satisfactory "aaahhh". She then turned her head towards the mare on the other side of the bed. The earth pony smiled gently at her wife. Her beautiful, generous, amazing...and paralyzed wife.
"Mornin' sleepy head", said AppleJack while circling the bed and posting herself in front of Rarity. Instead of greeting her wife, the white unicorn just scowled at her.
"Please just kill me", replied the mare. The farmer pursed her lips and cocked an eyebrow at her partner. She ignored her wife's plea, because she knew what Rarity needed right now.
"Hmm. Come on sugarcube, I think a stroll will brighten your mood a bit", said AppleJack while going towards a corner of the room to bring Rarity's wheelchair. Even though it was routine for her at this point, AppleJack still shuddered when she looked at the wheelchair, simply because it reminded her of the accident that crippled her beloved for life. All it took was a moment of negligence: the six friends were on an adventure when they encountered a huge chimera. The creature hit Rarity so hard that it broke her horn. Another hit send her flying towards a rocky wall, and everypony's heart almost leaped out of their chests when they heard a sickening crack. They all ran towards the fallen unicorn, fearing the worst, but breathed a sigh of relief when Rarity opened her eyes slowly.
"Rarity! Are ya ok?", managed AppleJack to ask, while trying her best to lift the unicorn up. But no matter how hard she tried, the white mare felt extremely heavy, as if she was made of lead. Rarity frantically moved her eyes left and right, then told them something that chilled the other friends to their bones.
"I can't feel anything below my neck!"
The farmer shook her head firmly and plastered a smile to her face. "No need to dwell on the past. At least she's still alive and still here with me", she thought. She started pushing the wheelchair towards the bed, much to Rarity's disdain.
"Cooome on sugarcube, nice and steady", said the strong orange pony while lifting the other mare and gently putting her on the wheelchair. She went to the dresser and retrieved a beautiful blue shawl, one that she knew Rarity used to love, and draped it along her wife's shoulders. She smiled, pleased with herself, then started pushing the wheelchair outside.
The two ponies strolled leisurely through Ponyville, AppleJack with a relaxed, slightly smiling face and Rarity with a miserable expression on hers. Some time ago, she loved when ponies looked at her, because she knew they admired her. Now, ponies looked at her with pity and concern, and Rarity hated it. She just wanted to die and be at peace. Her thoughts were interrupted by the mare next to her.
"How about we go and visit your lil' sister at the Boutique?Would ya like that?", asked AppleJack with hope in her voice. Rarity just hmphed, but AppleJack took it as a yes.
Sweetie Belle was busy modifying some dresses, since she lived alone now at the Boutique. She felt extremely sad for what happened to her sister and tried her best to make her feel good. She even tried creating a dress of her own for her dear sister, but Rarity just looked at it and replied with an apathetic "thanks". Fashion was not exactly her passion or calling, but she tried her best to keep the Boutique as her sister loved it as a form of respect for her, but also because Rarity told her that she can sell every item from the store and keep the money. Even though her sister had her life turned upside down and it was extremely difficult for her, Sweetie was very impressed by the fact that Rarity still possessed her generous spirit, even if it may have been unintentional, since she couldn't design or work on dresses anymore.
"Heeyy Sweetieee, are ya there?", called AppleJack while knocking on the door. She waited a little bit before she knocked again, and then heard hooves approaching the door.
"AJ! Rarity! It's so good to see you two!", replied Sweetie in a cheerful tone. Too cheerful, believed Rarity.
"Well, ya sister really wanted to see ya today, so we decided to pay ya a visit".
"Really? I'm so glad! Do you wanna enter, have some tea?", Sweetie Belle asked them politely. But just before AJ could respond, Rarity intervened.
"Yes, I am very happy to see you Sweetie, but I'm afraid we can't stay for tea. So please, AppleJack, be a dear and take me back to Sweet Apple Acres". Even though Rarity tried to sound as polite as she could, her sister could still notice the bitterness in her voice. She sadly waved the two mares goodbye as they left and turned back to her dresses.
At night, the two mares were sitting on the bed, staring at the ceiling. AppleJack knew Rarity was mad at her, since Rarity was almost all the time mad at her, but now it was more obvious since the mare was giving her the silent treatment. AppleJack knew it was hard for Rarity, and she couldn't hold it against her wife. She tried her best to remain calm and reasonable, but this facade was slowly deteriorating, simply because she was tired of constantly hearing Rarity beg her to be killed. Even though the farmer tried her best to empathize with her wife, deep down she was a bit disgusted that Rarity wanted the easy way out. Sure, she was paralyzed from the neck down. But she was still alive, right? She could still see the beauty of the world, she could still eat delicious food and even wear beautiful clothes. So in a way, AppleJack didn't understand her.
"AppleJack, please kill me"
"Here it goes again", the orange mare sighed while turning towards her wife.
"Ya know I'm not gonna do that, darling. Why do ya keep insistin'?"
"Don't darling me, AppleJack! Why do I keep insisting?? WHY DO I KEEP INSISTING??? I am literally a burden, AppleJack! I can't move anything besides my head, darling, and even that just barely! I can't work, I can't pamper myself, I can't strut! I may be the element of Generosity still, but I am useless to all of you! I hate this life, I just want to die! Is that so much to ask?"
"Rarity, you're not a burden, I-"
"Listen, darling. I know that what I'm asking you is hard. You can even call it selfish. But understand this: I can't live like this. I DON'T want to live like this. I'd rather die", replied the white mare calmly. She thought that if her wife at least realized that she was not insane, maybe she had more chances by pleading in a reasonable way. Rarity knew she was not insane, just desperate, miserable and pitiful.
"Rarity, please don't say that! I...I love ya", said AppleJack while holding back tears and sobs. Her heart broke for her poor wife.
"I love you too AppleJack, but you need to face reality: what you're having now is not a wife, is a burden. Please, do us both a favor and kill me. Do you honestly enjoy hearing me ask that daily? Do you get off on my begging?", asked Rarity with an air of finality and sadness. AppleJack looked at her, tears in her eyes. Then she sighed, hugged her wife and kissed her forehead.
"Goodnight, Rares", said the orange mare, then turned her back on her wife and tried to sleep, knowing that tomorrow she had a task to complete. It took a while, since she kept hearing Rarity begging for death and crying. AppleJack finally fell asleep with the hope that tomorrow, all of that will be over.
"Are ya sure y'all can look after her while I'm gone?", asked AppleJack with worry. Her other four friends nodded. Twilight approached the worried orange mare and put a hoof on her shoulder.
"Don't you worry none, AJ. We will take good care of her while you're gone", said the alicorn assuredly.
"Twi is right, AJ. But by the way, where are you going exactly?", asked curiously Rainbow Dash.
"Oh um, I need to go to Appleloosa to help my cousin Braeburn with some problems regardin' a few apple trees". While she was the element of Honesty, AppleJack didn't find it too hard to lie now.
After she returned, the orange farmer thanked her friends and waved them goodbye. She was forever grateful that they helped her with Rarity while she was away. Now, it was only her and her wife. She plucked a small bottle, full of a transparent liquid, from her saddlebags and presented it to Rarity. Suddenly, the white mare widened her eyes when she saw the small bottle. Bitterly, AppleJack noticed that this was the only different expression her wife made in the past months, besides her usual scowling.
"Hey, Rares. I came back with something for ya", said AppleJack while approaching the bed slowly, the small bottle still in her hoof.
"Darling, what is that?", asked Rarity, even though she had her suspicions, she still wanted to hear her wife say it.
"It's...um...a poison. I've been thinking, and you're right, I can't stand hearing you beg all the time for death". Even though it wasn't a gift, Rarity smiled as if she just received one.
"Darling I...thank you so much. You have no idea how much this means to me", said Rarity, tears brimming in her eyes. AppleJack smiled at her and opened the small bottle.
"Before I drink it though, can I ask what kind of poison it is? And..if it will be painful?"
"Nah, don't worry about it, it won't be painful, I assure ya. But...I just wanted to say that I love ya Rares, I will always love ya, no matter what. It is wonderful having ya as my wife, and an honor too ".
"I love you too AppleJack. Thanks for making my life wonderful". AppleJack nodded, then leaned down and kissed her wife passionately on the lips. Then, she put the bottle to Rarity's lips, and the mare somewhat fearfully drank all the liquid.
The earth pony watched in silence as her beloved wife choked and widened her eyes in a panic. Then, she gently put a hoof on Rarity's cheek, noticing how it got wet with the other mare's tears. AppleJack smiled broadly when she saw Rarity's expresionless face, apathetic eyes slowly rising to meet hers.
"So, it appears that the water from the Stream of Silence worked wonders".
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I’m just reading your wall of text and it’s no good because it’s a wall of text.
Break it up.
Holy crap I didn't read this in its entirety as I hate Uber dark stuff, but your twist is phenomenal. Have a like you evil being you.
So it wasn't poison but water from the stream of silence that she gave her because she didn't want her to be depressed all the time
11867515
Yeah, I'm still working on the structure of my stories
11867530
Thank you
11867622
I know that getting an editor might be difficult, but next time try that instead of just posting an entire wall of text, here is a question. How the hell did you even get that through?
Because the approval queue doesn’t allow just one wall of text.
11867563
.
You're only partially right, but I guess you can interpret it that way too. My first choice was that AJ wanted Rarity to stop begging for death, and she can't beg for death if she's mute, right?
11867563
no, because she did not want to hear about it.
she took away her only means of communication.
that is fucked up. even worse than actually giving
her poison, especially since she tricked her into
drinking it . .
11867625
To me it doesn't appear as just "a wall of text". I added paragraphs and I actually saw approved stories that WERE a wall of text. So I dunno...
11867630
Yep, you got it
I personally believe that for someone in Rarity's position, death is actually a mercy.
I was hoping that at the last moment Rarity would see Aj drink from the bottle too, but this is even more shocking.
11867630
Lets also remember that, aside from one of their kind, the waters also deadened emotion. So not only is Rarity silent. she doesn't even care how or why she is, or even about her state of affairs.
Ah, this weeks' version of "I discovered 'Johnny Got His Gun' and must put it in pony form"
11868112
Huh? Is that a movie or something?I'm from Europe, I don't think I've heard of it
If you really wanna know, the inspiration for this story was a combination of:
I suddenly remembered a story about a crippled Rainbow Dash x AJ, but there the twist was that she was actually dead(I think it was made by Rubydubious but I might be wrong)
I just rewatched MLP season 8 and that's how I came with the water from the stream of silence(the kirin episode)
I actually had a completely paralyzed aunt that lived with us when I was younger and...yeah I don't need to say too much about that, but most of Rarity's dialogue and sentiments are my interpretation of my aunt's struggles
11868253
Johnny Got his Gun is a novel by Dalton Trumbo, which tells the story of a paralysed war veteran who cannot communicate his suffering yet is kept on perpetual life support. It was the basis for a Metallica song, which uses clips from the film adaptation of the movie in the music video.
Whilst this had the potential to be emotional, it has quite a few problems. Firstly, the paragraphing is a bit of a mess. A standard rule of writing is 'new speaker, new paragraph'. For example:
Correctly formatted, it would look like this:
See how much easier this is to read?
We also don't get a real sense of how Rarity is feeling, and precisely why she no longer wants to go on living. Obviously being unable to walk sucks (as somebody who broke his leg I can verify), but it feels like Rarity is being overdramatic. If you want to see another example of the theme done well, I'd suggest reading Johnny Got his Gun.
Various grammar mistakes and a wall of text. I won’t really point it all out since the whole single paragraph thing makes the quote feature hard to use.
So, basically, Applejack hated that her wife was constantly begging her for death, it would have been better if:
Maybe AJ would kill herself too, leaving a sort of bittersweet "If you’re going down then I’m going down with you" type of ending. Or it could end with her resolving to try and find a cure for Rarity’s paralysis. But no, she chooses to remove her ability to speak and feel any emotions, wow.
Applejack’s decision does not feel right, the water from the Stream of Silence also makes creature become emotionless, that is not good. This gets a PRETTY BAD from me.
11868754
Thanks for the explanations, I will try to edit the story when I have time.
However, regarding the last part: I wouldn't say Rarity is overdramatic, since she is basically paralyzed, she can't feel anything below her neck. Even with a broken leg, you could still move your arms, use crutches and basically still be a functioning human being, while also knowing that your leg will get healthy again. Like I said in the story, Rarity had everything taken away from her and I tend to believe that what she went through takes a toll on any sane person
11869047
Aside from your grammar and wall of text, which were fair points, I...don't understand the other points you were trying to make:
"Maybe AJ would kill herself too, leaving a sort of bittersweet "If you’re going down then I’m going down with you" type of ending. Or it could end with her resolving to try and find a cure for Rarity’s paralysis."
The point here was the twist. There are a lot of stories that end with "and they both unalived themselves". And I even pointed out in a previous comment that one inspiration for the story was another story where Rainbow Dash is paralyzed and AJ is taking care of her, and the twist there is that Rainbow Dash was dead. Just like you have your opinion, I have mine, and I decided to make the story to add a twist, not make a linear and predictable story where it would be obvious that they would both die. Also, since Rarity is paralyzed for months already and she resigned herself to that fate, I'd say that finding a cure for her paralysis failed, not to mention that I didn't even wanted to explore that option, since...well, in real life people don't magically get better from spinal cord injury(sure, they are MAGICAL horses, but even in the show we can see that magic can't fix anything).
"Applejack’s decision does not feel right, the water from the Stream of Silence also makes creature become emotionless, that is not good."
Regarding AJ's character: the idea here was that Rarity is miserable all the time and upset with AppleJack, but AJ knows she can't do what she asks, but at the same time, she is tired hearing Rarity all the time begging for death. What she did was selfish and cruel, true, but that was exactly the point and the reason why the story has a "dark" tag and not a "slice of life" or other tag like that. But in my opinion, this isn't far from reality, since AJ doesn't have the easiest life: she has to take care of the farm and take care of Rarity, who is completely paralyzed and constantly begs for death. Believe me, I know what I'm talking about when I say that life with a paralyzed person is not easy...
11869099
Ah. I'd rather misunderstood the extent of Rarity's injuries. I'd thought paralysis from the waist down was the case here.
im starting to read fics because i was looking for more mlp content and this was a really cool read!! nice work!!
11869877
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it