After years spent as a statue in the garden of Princess Twilight Sparkle, Cozy Glow is rescued by a mysterious unicorn calling herself Sunset Shimmer, who intended to take her back to the mirror realm for rehabilitation. But something went wrong with the portal and they instead ended up in the realm of Everglow. A realm much like Equestria, but where ponykind has still to unite under one banner.
Making their home in the Unicorn Kingdom of Taralos, Sunset meets and befriends the griffin Silverwing while Cozy makes a friend in the royal court, the mysterious intelligence operative Cipher who, like Cozy, hides a dark secret.
When the horn of the son of the reigning monarch is stolen before his coronation, Cozy vows to find it in order to increase her standing with the royal family. The first step of her plan to one day take over as the reigning monarch, to rule Taralos as the Empress of Friendship. Will Cozy succeed in her ambitions? Or will Sunset's influence be enough to make her become the hero Taralos needs?
Inspired by the To Found an Empire Ponyfinder adventure path by David Silver for Pathfinder.
Great chapter
11552694
Thank you, glad you liked it.
Good Start. I would advise you an editor to go over your formatting though.
This chapter is a bit better than the last one. You're learning quickly. I'm looking forward to seeing how this story goes.
11553022
Thank you, glad you liked the story.
If the formatting issue only apply to the first chapter, the formatting in the first chapter got a bit messed up because I copied the text over using a mobile device, I have been trying my best to fix it but there are still probably some formatting errors in there that I didn't spot.
When I copied the second chapter over directly from word using my laptop it retained the original formatting. Though I did wonder if perhaps some paragraphs are too long.
I have a feeling that Sunset highly disagrees the harsh punishment of stone imprisonment of a child like Cozy Glow ( Even though that brat is a villain menace. ).
Am I right?
11554488
Yep, you got that right, Sunset does in fact not approve of punitive justice as a concept, that Cozy is a child just makes things look even worse in her eyes.
11554515
She will have choice words with Twilight, Celestia, Luna, and Discord. Once she and Cozy Glow return from their "trip".
11554535
Well, there is a reason the story is tagged with Twilight even if she has yet to appear in the story.
That's not how this works, Cozy. Unless you marry him, you're not a member of the Royal Family. And even then, there's a whole bunch of reasons why she would never be the monarch.
Unless I missed something somewhere
11556553
Well, this hasn't stopped Cozy from trying to take over a country in the past. She has a tendency to be more than a bit overambitious, Cozy seems to have this belief that the individual that is the most well-liked and has the most friends will automatically become the next monarch, probably basing this belief on Twilight Sparkle. I think you're right, more realistically speaking the best Cozy can hope for is to be a trusted advisor to the royal family, at least without another coup. Which considering she has already done a coup in Equestria twice already, would you put that past her?
11556564
Unless the family is hated and rebellion is brewing, overthrowing a hereditary monarchy is not as simple as overthrowing Twilight in Equestria was. Overdosed on magic as she was. Or Cozy is not above good old-fashioned murder.
Is Cipher also a filly?
11556598
Knowing Cozy it might be a matter of creating the conditions necessary for rebellion to be brewing. Granted that is easier said than done if the kingdom of Taralos is constantly at risk from outside threats, as it's also not in Cozy's best interests to have the kingdom fall to invaders. Cozy might also not be the only one currently vying for the throne, and the ones who are do have a better claim.
11556605
Cipher is around the same age as Cozy currently is, but as it has been many years since Cozy's imprisonment in stone, she's actually older now than she used to be. Sorry if I might not have been clear enough about that in the story.
Given your interest in Ponyfinder you should check out the account of David Silver. https://www.fimfiction.net/user/162259/David+Silver
He's vague about wheter he's the developer of Ponyfinder but the stories are great.
About the story itself I suggest getting an editor to check the formatting. Other that that it's an interesting start.
This is certainly an improvement in formatting but I think you could still benefit from an editor or proofreader.
This chapter does have interesting developments but I find it personally alightly difficult to follow because of the way everything presented. It might just be that long journal entries that give little idea of what characters are thinking or feeling are not my thing.
This is not really my kind of story. It's mostly allright but simply not my cup of tea.
11571680
Thank you for your input. This has been a one person project, so I have not had access to an editor. Don't think I can afford one honestly. I have been trying to include more of the character personal thoughts in later chapters. Did specifically go into more details about Cozy in the Gathering of Clans chapter.
And yes, I do know David Silver, I am in one of the Pathfinder games he runs. So I can confirm 100% that the author on this site with that name is the Ponyfinder creator.
11556625
So what you're saying is she not a filly? Are there any major characters in this story who are fillies?
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To explain this the best I can, the Defenders of Taralos is a military organization and probably wouldn't hire super young fillies for dangerous missions. That being said, there is one set characters around Cozy's age (primarily Cipher and Night's Blessing), and another set which are older (Sunset, Twilight, Silverwing and Shadow Chaser). As for Cozy I kind of made the assumption that she was around 11 or 12 when Friendship is Magic Season 8 and 9 took place, her being around 16 when Sunset released her from stone, 17 during the Gem Gnoll War and 23 after the time skip in the latest chapter. Cipher and Night's Blessing around the same age as Cozy during the same time period with only a year or so apart. So if you would consider Cozy at 16 at the start of this story a filly, then yes, otherwise, no. I hope this answer was informative.
Are there any badass little girls in this story?
11630286
Well, Cozy was pretty badass even when she was a filly. Villainous, but exceptional. If she could shake Equestria to its foundation even as a child. She has even more potential when she is older, for good or for ill.
This story is partially about exploring that potential.
11556623
Family automatically has claim to the throne above anyone else. Cozy isn't family. That's the whole problem with her shtick in both worlds. Her self proclaimed title means nothing. Especially if she had stolen Equestria's magic.
Twilight is the real Empress of Friendship anyway, and has earned it several times over.
11695649
An that’s why she was an empress and not a queen.
In entertainment culture, the word ‘emperor’ was related to ‘usurper’ than anything else.
emperor palpatine, god emperor of mankind. Both are famous characters from big franchises, and their characters aren’t shaped by ‘royal family’ or ‘bloodline’.
Twilight was a Unicorn from Canterlot of unicorn parents, likely a descendant of a noble house too. Peaceful transition of power. She’s much more fitting as a ‘Queen’ more than ‘Empress’. ‘Queen’ in entertainment culture is more motherly, beloved by citizens when compare to ‘‘empress’.
11695712
Only thing is, Palpatine and the Emperor had the power and authority to back it up. Cozy doesn't. And while Twilight would never use either Queen or Empress as her title. She has more right to the title than Cozy does.
11695738
And that’s why Cozy is the main character of this story and those guys are just minor background casts. So much for Cozy to be done and that means more room to grow.
It doesn’t matter if Twilight was stronger or have more right to the throne. She’s a empress, the usurper of the throne. Playing by rules and gaining her position rightfully was never in her character.
“I needed approvals to be a princess of Equestria? No, I will just sucked up all magic an forcefully beat down Equestria into submission”
11695649
You would be right, but it has always been in the nature of Cozy Glow to reach for the stars, even when success is impossible. She might be a better person by this point in the story than she used to be, but Cozy still have a weakness to promises of power.
I always saw Cozy as someone who started out with nothing, a random orphan of exceptional talent who nontheless challanged the rule of demigods and almost succeeded in accomplishing the impossible. Overambition has always been Cozy's weakness, if she aimed for anything less than the ruler of all she would probably have been successful. But her ego demands her to always been the best.
I really enjoy writing Cozy. And the reason for this is that her struggles with overcoming her pretty significant flaws makes her pretty fun to write.
11630493
Well yes, but I’m talking about a character who starts out as a badass filly in this story and stays that way throughout the entire story. She can be an actual filly or an adult/teen/100+ years old who looks like a filly. Does this story have any characters like that in it?
11706576
I think you might be interested in a story I intend to publish soon that will tell the story of how the Cozy Glow of Midnight's original world became her world's Element of Magic and led a group of friends who formed the Elements of Harmony against the tyranny of Daybreaker, Nightmare Moon and Midnight. Cozy Glow will be a filly for most of this story and I plan on having Diamond Tiara as a major character as well. It will serve as a prequel to this one.
Edit. Also, I do plan to introduce Flurry Heart in this story in about a chapter or so.
Hello! Your story really interested me! The concept of Cozy Glow as a hero, an excellent strategist and a talented commander is impressive. I also liked the theme of the redeemer Sunset, as well as Twilight revising her views on the concept of correcting villains, as well as Midnight, establishing Harmony and Order in a perverted sense with an iron hoof. A special plus for the high-quality development of unique backstories for Cozy Glow and Chrysalis.
And the narration in the form of character diaries as events unfold in a role-playing game format gives the story a unique charm!
Overall, this is a masterpiece! Looking forward to the continuation!
P.S. I wonder how all the villains of the new world will be defeated and how long it will take? And how will the heroes even defeat Midnight, who has already defeated Cozy Glow once with all her friends and the magic of Harmony? Overall, it will be interesting to see what you come up with.
11816714
Thank you so much, glad you are enjoying this story. Means alot to me as a writer.
It's nice to see Chrysalis and Tirek becoming Flurry Heart's allies. The main thing is that Cozy finds a way to control the vanity of her new alicorn friend.
Looking forward to the continuation!
Holy shoooooooooot, how did I look into this closer????
Like I can already tell a lot of thought got put into the concept, I need to read this asap.
Super interested!
Your fanfic captures one of the best backstories for Cozy! And the fitting scene between Cozy and Twilight was touching! Thanks for your work!
P.S. I hope that at the end of the story, Cozy, along with old and new friends, will defeat Midnight and save his alternate universe version from eternal torment.