Goodbye to a World

Science Fiction Contest82 stories ·151 members

After an unfortunate accident renders Rainbow Dash unconscious, she wakes in a strange new world filled with hostile pony-like creatures. Stuck in a booming metropolis with unrecognizable technology and a less-than-welcoming reception from its locals, she is desperate to find a way home.

However, she quickly learns that she has bigger concerns. Unrest spreads amongst the inhabitants of this city like wildfire, and Rainbow Dash finds herself in the midst of a society teetering on the brink of revolution.

Submission for the Science Fiction Contest II.

Cover art by Gusty.

Chapters (5)

Preface · 27th Mar 2023 · 355 words
355
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Part 1: The In-Between · 27th Mar 2023 · 10,035 words
10,035
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Part 2: The Resistance · 30th Mar 2023 · 11,364 words
11,364
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Part 3: The Blood Moon · 2nd Apr 2023 · 13,111 words
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Epilogue · 2nd Apr 2023 · 2,303 words
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Comments ( 8 )

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Train Lover 30049

Train Lover 30049 #1 · Apr 2nd, 2023 · 1 · · Epilogue ·

I loved reading this story. If there were a sequel, I would definitely read it.

Reba_McIntosh

Reba_McIntosh #2 · Apr 2nd, 2023 · 2 · · Epilogue ·

11545841
I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for the feedback.

Kazutae

Kazutae #3 · Apr 3rd, 2023 · 1 · · Epilogue ·

This story was amazing. I need an update faster than a pony runs from a glue truck.

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #4 · May 29th, 2023 · · · Preface ·

intriguing start! definitely an idea that is personally appealing to me

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #5 · May 29th, 2023 · · · Part 1: The In-Between ·

Rainbow subtly slowed her pace, letting herself drift on the breeze for a moment before zooming forward once more. “Just TRY and beat me!” She challenged, knowing full well that she intended to let her have this win. As much as she hated defeat and prided herself on her competitive nature, she had a soft spot for the young filly that had grown to become the equivalent of a little sister to her. And so it was with much horror that she cast her gaze downward to find Scootaloo headed right towards a cart moving at a dangerously fast speed.

so true extremely Rainbow Dash especially the last sentence

Just as a few nearby ponies rushed to help her, a large crack rang out through the town square. Dazed and disoriented, she could only sit and watch with delayed horror as the fountain's stone statue splintered in half and came crashing down on top of her.

oh no is this her getting Isekai’d

He wore a silver jumpsuit with black stitching that shone against his dark blue coat, and Rainbow noted a small badge pinned to its front that read “Council Guard.”

oh, good thing they also speak Ponish here!

“Let me go!” She bucked against them, landing several clean blows to their sides and eliciting a few grunts and growls as her hits connected. Still, there were too many of them. She attempted to fly up and out of their grasp, but they grabbed her by the hindlegs, managing to pin her to the ground and, with much effort, clamped some sort of circular device around her midsection.

well, that’s not good

If she were more like Rarity, she would be concerned about the state of her mane and rush for the nearest mirror.

as she should!

“ENOUGH.” The thundering boom of a horseshoe banging onto the wood of the table reverberated throughout the chamber, and the furious voice of the Councilpon served as a total 180 from his previous demeanor. His eyebrows knitted together as he stared at her with derision. “You will not speak unless spoken to, pony.”

ooh that is very not good!

“Look, she's already gotten in your head, bits-for-brains,” he scolded, turning to the three other guards. “Let this be a warning. No matter what they say, you can't believe them. Ponies can't be trusted.”
“Ponies can't be trusted,” They repeated in unison, each giving a matter-of-fact nod as if reciting something they'd been taught their entire lives.

dang what did ponies ever do to these guys?

She plopped onto the bed with a self-pitying laugh, hating herself for how badly she wanted to give in to the comfort of its plush pillows and soft sheets.

well at least the bed’s comfy

“I'm Rainbow Dash,” She puffed up a bit as if, for a moment, she expected Avina to recognize her by name. “They call me the Element of Loyalty back home, so, y'know... kind of a big shot.” She blew on a hoof and rubbed it against the fur of her chest with a cheeky grin.

aww, Rainbow Dash does not understand what genre she is in at all! love her

“Didn't you tell her?” Orwin's whispered words weren't as discreet as he wished them to be.
“Of course I did,” Avina rolled her eyes. “Typical pony. She probably didn't listen to a word I said.”

aww, even her rescuers feel this way! what a world

“She SHOULD be able to?! Oh, I feel faint...” Rarity's hoof shot up to her face in distress at the news, her eyes fluttering shut as she fell backward onto a chaise lounge that had been conveniently placed behind her.

if there was any time for that chaise longue it is now, Rares

“I get it,” Twilight whispered back, putting a comforting hoof on her shoulder. “I'm worried, too. But you know Rainbow Dash. She's been in worse incidents than this and lived to tell the tale. I think if we just give her a bit of time, she'll wake up and be back to causing trouble before we know it.”
“I sure hope you're right, Twilight.”
“Yeah,” Twilight responded, resting her head on a pillow as she looked up at the unconscious figure of her friend. “Me too.”

aww, so this is what the Isekai looks like from the original world! poor Scootaloo, and all of Rainbow’s friends…

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #6 · May 29th, 2023 · · · Part 2: The Resistance ·

The male Pon showed her his collection of gadgets, introducing her to the inner workings of their designs and demonstrating their daily usage. She was fascinated by his creations, utterly enthralled with the way he could bring things to life without the use of magic. The details of his inventions were complex, and while she appreciated seeing them in action, her mind went blank each time he attempted to explain how they worked.

of all the ponies to be isekai’d to this world, Rainbow Dash is definitely the one whose mind would be blankest here!

She ran a hoof over those intricately constructed wings as she considered this, wondering if most of its citizens were like Orwin and Avina—inherently good ponies in a bad situation.

so true

By the time her third day in Pontropolis had arrived, she simply couldn't take it anymore. She threw on the cloak that had been left for her in the basement and snuck up the staircase and out onto the sidewalk, blending in with the small crowd of Pons that were minding their own business as they traveled down the street.

oof. the foolhardiness is definitely Rainbow Dash, but she still knows hardly anything about this culture and how to blend in!

She nodded in agreement with an enthusiastic smile before glancing over her shoulder at the shop that lay beyond, a mischievous sparkle in her eye. "So... since I'm here, can I help out in the shop?"
His deep, rich laugh echoed throughout that tiny space they shared, and he wiped away the beginnings of a tear in his eye before his sight fell upon her once more, and he deadpanned, "No."

ahaha perfect

Rainbow frowned as she took the sight in. How could an area like this be so dilapidated and poverty-ridden when naught but a gallop away, Pons lived in style and luxury? It didn't make any sense.

really makes you think about Pon society

The blue mare reared her head back, meeting Avina's eyes with an equal level of hostility as she stood her ground. "Are you serious?" She huffed, disbelief lilting her voice upwards. "I was offering a hoof. He was starving."
"I can't see how that's any of your concern," she shot back, wild green eyes blazing from underneath her hood. "These aren't your people."

and, oof. this interaction is all too true to life, and i imagine Rainbow Dash in the human world would have similar scenes play out

"Our group is dedicated to helping everypon the Council has turned their backs on," she said sympathetically. "We were formed when Mardeen became Head Councilpon"—more boos—"and we strive to bring an end to their corrupt rule. They spin webs of lies, turning us against a common enemy: ponies. But we all know who the true enemy is."

ooh! so true that is how the corrupt and powerful do things

"I must say, it's actually my first time meeting a pony," Xavir gave her an inquisitive look, placing his hoof to his chin in thought. "Usually, Avina handles those matters."
"Yeah, I know, I'm pretty cool," Rainbow flashed him a toothy grin, removing the hood of her cloak and allowing him to bask in the glory of her visage. "You can have my autograph if you want."

oh Rainbow Dash, never change!

"Always such a sourpuss," Dash uttered, reclining back on her cushion lazily. "I said I got it, right? The Council has gone mad with power and everypony's suffering because of it. On top of that, they've targeted us ponies as the cause of all their issues, which is why they were such jerks to me." She propelled herself off of the pillow and stood, stretching her legs. "Well, I won't be anypony's scapegoat. Scapepony. Whatever. The question is, what's being done about it?"
Avina and Xavir turned towards each other simultaneously, identical looks of surprise lighting their faces.

also so Rainbow Dash, who is very good at learning things when not paying attention as we have seen in canon

"Well, that's lame." The blue mare snorted.
"Dash!" Avina hissed, scowling in her direction.
"What? It is!" She jabbed her hooves into the air enthusiastically. "I say we beat 'em up!"

oh Rainbow Dash, never change!

"After that, it was the ponies. We'd seen several of them over the years, and we always showed them hospitality, as they were nothing but friendly to us. However, she twisted their stories, turning their words against them as they found themselves trapped here with no means to escape. They became a target. With Pontropolis focused on the threat of the ponies, the Council could get away with so much more. I don't even know if there's anypon that's kept track of all the laws they've enacted," Avina said dryly, shaking her head. "Of course, I was young when all of this started. I was only a few moons old when my father..."

oof, sounding all too familiar, this

Avina shot her a challenging smirk. "I wouldn't trust anypon else with the job. You know what they call me?"
"What?"
"Silenthooves."
"BAHAHAHA!!" Rainbow pressed a hoof to her chest, howling with laughter at the ridiculous nickname. Even Avina let out a faint giggle, bolstered by the pony's asinine reaction. "You can't be serious!"

aww, Rainbow Crash, you should know about silly nicknames!

Rainbow Dash made herself comfortable on the sofa, setting her things down next to it and resting her legs on a low-hanging coffee table. "Nice pad," she grinned.
"Honestly," Avina grumbled, trotting over to pick up the things she'd abandoned on the floor. "You're going to leave this place a pigsty."
"Hey!" Dash exclaimed, not budging from the indent that had begun to form in the cushion beneath her. "That's mean to pigs."

love how self-aware Rainbow Dash is

"I don't know who you think you are, acting like you're some hero that can show up and magically fix everything. This isn't an issue that can be settled over a hug and a friendship lesson, featherbrain.

aww, but so many things can!

It was with this in mind that the pegasus trotted over to the front door after hearing the sound of hoofsteps outside. Avina had returned, and she was determined to earn her forgiveness.
However, when she swung the door open, the Pon that stood waiting on the other side was not Avina.

oof, classic switch

Dash, wherever you are, you need to hurry back soon, she thought as her gaze flicked from her friend to the filly beside her. Ya hear me? Don't keep Scoot waitin'.
Rainbow, of course, couldn't hear her.

augh, poor Applejack!

His eyes landed on her, and he raised a hoof placatingly. "Wait," he pleaded, taking a step back when he noticed the weapon in her grasp. "Please. I have a message for you." He pulled a piece of paper out of the pocket of his uniform and offered it to her. "Your location has been compromised. Go to this address."

oof, good thing Rainbow Dash didn’t stab him

"Whoa, how'd she know my name?"
"That's what you gleaned from this?" Avina eyed her incredulously before rereading the words herself. "I can't believe this." She glared at the letter so intensely that Rainbow thought it might burst into flames right then and there.

ahahahaha love Rainbow Dash

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #7 · May 29th, 2023 · · · Part 3: The Blood Moon ·

Pontropolis had clearly gone through a number of questionable fashion trends, and sifting through the hodgepodge of absurd materials left Rainbow with something to do besides twiddling her hooves.

hey, Rainbow Dash isn’t Rarity! who is she to judge?

She caught Avina's eye and told her, "You aren't alone in this—you have friends you can rely on." Her tone turned serious. "They can't be there for you if you don't let them. Trust me."
The red mare frowned at this, but the emotion swirling in her eyes signified that Dash's words had gotten through to her. "I suppose you're right," she relented, letting out a sigh and freeing her tail from her grasp.

aww, Rainbow Dash emotional support!

Avina insisted that everypony disguise themselves in festival attire—elaborate costumes of reds, oranges, and golds that would allow them to seamlessly blend into the crowds of bystanders. Leor kept his uniform on while Orwin and Xavir wore matching red tunics with glittery gold bow ties, and Avina forced herself into an elegant dress that matched the color of their accessories, its sheer sleeves patterned with intricate, swirling designs of gold.

ooh, love these!

The extent of his actions began to sink in: the first time she'd met him, when he'd claimed to have heard about her already, followed shortly by the discovery of their location. He must have been informing the Council of their plans from the very beginning.

oof! well the existence of a rat was being talked about this whole time…

"You know, I'm quite surprised you made it this far," Mardeen said thoughtfully. "You ponies are usually pretty thick in the skull, and those that do escape don't last very long."

sadly, Rainbow Dash is not the best candidate to disprove that stereotype

"Oh, don't be so dramatic. How do you think we power the city? All those luxuries enjoyed by the upper class—which I assume you wouldn't know anything about—would be impossible without the magic of the ponies. The Orb's power is just an added bonus. Eventually, though, it'll be more than that."

oof, that metaphor is very on-the-nose!

Just when she was about to give up, a thought struck her. She imagined a lightbulb flashing to life above her head as she had a rare stroke of genius.

yay!

This did the trick, as they were clearly not up for doing anything outside of the bare minimum for their wages. Orwin shot Rainbow a wink as he unlocked the door and led them in. He informed the guards stationed inside the workroom that there was an emergency down the hallway, creating some vague excuse to get them to leave. Somehow, it worked.

and so the way this rigid hierarchy treats its workers comes back to bite them, classic. defeating evil is easy!

"C-Celestia?" A hoarse whisper from her right shot a thrill through Rainbow as she jumped to attention. A pale green unicorn with a frosted pink mane had taken her eyes off the rock and looked at her in wonder.
"YES!" Rainbow nearly lunged at the mare, her raspy voice rising an octave. "Princess Celestia!"

so true that is the effect of Princess Celestia’s name on ponies devoid of hope and life

"Now let's get your magic back. In the name of Celestia!"

hell yeah!

She moved aside as the panicked ponies filed out quickly, prisoners and guards alike sharing the small exit in an attempt to escape the crumbling building. Upon seeing Dash's questioning look, she smirked, "Silenthooves."

great callback

She cleared her throat before saying, "Attention, Pontropolis!" Her magic-enhanced voice boomed throughout the city, drawing the attention of everypony gathered in the square. "My name is Rainbow Dash. Write it down. I know you all may not be the biggest fans of ponies, but you better listen up anyways."

aww, Rainbow Dash gets to make her big speech!

She raised a hoof, pointing at the damaged Orb behind her. She was silhouetted against the blood moon, her shadow stretching forth from her position atop the stairs. She looked... regal.

all hail Princess Avina

"I'm so sorry," Xavir pleaded, his ears flattening as he fixed his gaze on his blue hoofs ashamedly. That charm that he'd displayed upon their first meeting was nowhere to be seen as he groveled before her. "Please let me explain. I had no other option—"
"I don't want to hear it." Rainbow had to stop herself from biting his head off, reigning in her temper and keeping her legs firmly planted on the ground. "I don't care what reason you had for doing what you did. Loyalty means a lot to me, dude, and you blew it."

so true she is the Element of Loyalty

"Your proximity allows its magic to seep into your reality pretty easily, I'd say. Either luring you here or taking advantage of ponies that are already physically or psychologically vulnerable. That last part's just a theory, though."

ooh, an in-world justification for the Isekai process

She'd grown accustomed to sneaking around Pontropolis, sharing jokes with Orwin and intentionally getting under Avina's skin. They'd become closer than she thought they would, and the prospect of never seeing them again effectively took the spring out of her step.

aww, that is a little heartbreaking, i must admit!

She raised a hoof in the air as she hovered just past the threshold, waving to the individuals she owed her life to. Whatever the future had in store for her, she knew deep in her heart that she would always have friends here.
"Goodbye."
And, just like that, she was gone.

and aww! really glad she got to share that moment with Avina before she left

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #8 · May 29th, 2023 · · · Epilogue ·

"That sounds like a terrifying dream," Fluttershy said softly, worry evident in her eyes.
"It wasn't a dream!" Dash exclaimed, frazzled. "It really happened. And it was scary, but it was no sweat. I could have saved all those ponies with one wing tied behind my back."
"Sounds to me like you came up with quite the adventure to keep yourself busy while you were snoozin'." Applejack snickered.
"You guys aren't listening to me!" She barked.

aww, poor Rainbow! seeing such a meaningful experience of hers reduced to this

Scootaloo had been ecstatic to see Dash when she woke up, bursting into tears and apologizing for getting her hurt. The two made up and before they knew it they were back to their old shenanigans, performing tricks and racing one another as if no time had passed.

though i certainly would hope Rainbow is a bit more careful about having statues fall on her from now on!

"I have to prepare for another embassy visit. Princess Celestia said they were from some far-off land that I'd never even heard of before. Can you believe that? Me? Never heard of?" She let out a bout of crazed laughter. "Which means it has to be perfect because—"
"Wait, wait, wait." She cut her off, her heart thumping wildly in her chest. Her mouth dried as she slowly lifted her head to look at her. "The... name...?"
"Reptarus," she told her. "The city of Pontropolis, to be exact."

ooh, what a twist! and a wonderful end, confirming that Rainbow Dash’s adventures were indeed real, and that maybe she will even get to see Avila again. loved how Rainbow Dash was very, very Rainbow Dash in this. thank you for writing!

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