- Member Since 30th Mar, 2020
- offline last seen 4 hours ago
k00l
OG brony who really loves Crossover fics. Twilight is my waifu, and I'm not ashamed of it.
k00l
Joined 30th Mar, 2020 ·
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Sequels1
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So, no mentioning the Bat Ponies, Zebras, Buffalos, Diamond Dogs, Minotaurs, Kirins, Donkeys, Deers/Reindeers, Storm Creatures/Yeti, Avians/Birds, Abyssinian Cats, Centaurs/Gargoyles, Saddle Arabia Horses, etc....
P.S. That Human Shield reminds me of Warhammer.
What's a Patriam?
11442815
Lol, sorry, didn't feel like listing off that many, felt repetitive.
11442821
It's Latin, it roughly translates to Country or Land. I using it as the name of the land of humans
It's obvious that the French side are bad! What about the equivalent of Germany and Italy Kingdoms?
Is their ever a morally good Human Kingdom?
11442835
That will explained later on.
11442815
I was going to say Magic: the Gathering. Boros Legion from Guilds of Ravnica.
11442882
I can see the resemblance;
https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/mtg/images/f/fd/Boros_Legion_banner.png/revision/latest?cb=20130217211002
Twilight is Doomed
Forgot that about Sunset might have a better understanding on the human condition (though this trip would interfere with her education) ...
Hmmm, Spain, rather than Germany, would have worked a bit better (for the languages) as Spanish, French, and Italian are all Latin decedents ...
11443880
That is true. Without spoiling my plans for where I want to take this, I plan to do a lot of "exploring" with this fiction. Also I had a plans of the Human languages helping the formation of Ponish, since irl English has Latin and Germanic roots.
11442828
P.S. I forgot to put in Caribou. But hopefully, it's better that they won't be in this story. For obvious reasons.
Something tells me that the human princess (forgot her name) is a crazy b*tch.
11442828
I don't want to sound like a jerk but you spelled changelings wrong in the bio of the story 'Changlongs'
I really enjoyed the story but something's kind of confused me. Like the main villains motivation, yes it is pretty basic for a villain I want to take over the world in my people are better than your people. But her plan makes no real sense. He wants to use Twilight to somehow boost her army's strength but she needs twilight's assistance. I can only assume they're going to torture her to get what they want but that would not help them first. He would be weaker and then they would eventually have to take off her magic restraints in after that there's nothing stopping her from teleporting away. And now let's talk about the magical restraints this kind of threw me off as well. I can only make the assumption that whatever the ring did, it cut off all of her magic including her earth, pony strength and her ability to fly because Twilight was thrown through a mountain and then had a empowered tyric slammed into her and ran through that same mountain. So a couple of soldiers with blades probably would not do as much damage but cause some injury but she could have escaped or flown away. I guess my last question is power balance. It seems like humans are better Marshall fighters and weapon users versus ponies magic use. And I guess signing armor is supposed to be more of a hot head in this, but instead of engaging humans in the hand, the hand combat which I assume he knows that humans are better at. He could have this used his magic and put up a barrier. But I guess you can stay in foresight. Anyone can do that. Any unicorn?
11449401
Thank you for your comment, I have no problem explaining what plans I have for the future installments. First I did power crept the magic just a little bit. Shining Armor being the Prince of the Crystal Empire (Essentially being the magic capital of the world) He would most definately take out a small army by himself using magic alone. Yes, the ring is cutting off all forms of magic for Twilight including flight and earth pony strength. Twilight would be able to decimate the humans if she was at full strength, hence why the human Princess had to play nice to get the ring on her befre she could reveal her motive. Her motive though cliche has to do with her backstory that I have planned for her, but I mostly want to keep it as a secret untill then because it plays a bigger part of the story later on after I release a few more chapters. Also her motive for the magic just boils down to human ignorance at this point. in my story the humans have forcefully kept themselves Isolated, but not being magical creatures themselvs they know next to nothing about magic. So her "Torture Methods" Are just a way for Twilight to reveal more info about Magic so that she gets a clearer understanding of what it even is. Like I said though i don't want to reveal too much because it will all become more relevant soon.
11449517
I see now. If there's more to be seen, I don't see the ponies winning against humans in the street fight even with alicorn magic. If this is the time. I think it is in things like long range weapons exist or gunpowder with their limited knowledge but still be able to have magical supplies or weapons to fight back against the ponies with not end well. The knowledge they had to restrain twilight's magic and the ability to seemingly craft magic items with both sides. Not really both sides. It seems like humans know a little more about ponies than ponies know about humans so with a slight advantage on the other side, seems like this is going to be one hell of a story.
11446206
She is named Léone.
So, what the heck is with the huge hostility and xenophobia against ponies?
11453560
In a nutshell: Humans distrust all creatures outside their homeland.
I'm purposely leaving some things blank as a mystery. Majority of the lore I have thought up will be revealed soon.
I actually hope Celestia burns this bitch!
He does realize that this was once a very bloody battle grave? Those poppies weren't always Red.
Also, what the f*** is Léone's deal!? Is her father ( The French King ) just as bad, or is it just her?
I so definitely want Celestia, Luna, and Cadence to turn into Daybreaker, Nightmare Moon, and Heart Breaker respectfully, and torture that bitches ass! See how Léone will handle those three at full power.
She definitely reminds me of a certain Ex-Princess Bitch from Rise of the Shield Hero. Coincidence!?
11490939
I've been hinting that Léone was a lier from the start. Everything she told Twilight in the second chapter was a lie. That's why her take of Patriam's history didn't match up with What Johannes said. Even her name hints at this. All the monarch's names has translation. I have even used them for the titles of chapters. Drachenkopf translates to "Dragon's Head" Santamano transtalates to "Saints hand." Léone's last name, Trompeur, translates to "Deciever." Devil's in the detail with this fic. And a key thing to know, do not trust everything Léone says.
11490948
Why should I even "trust" her, when I already want her bloody head on a pike, and I compare her to a another disliked "princess" character from a famous anime/manga?
DAMN THE FRENCH! *TF2 Soldier Laugh*
11490939
That be overkill an arrow in the head would kill her she isn't that much of a threat again this is medevil humans not really a threat when also having magic they have griffins and dragons as allies.
11501197
Then there's the Changelings, Yaks, Zebras, Hippogriffs/Sea Ponies, Diamond Dogs, Minotaurs, Centaurs/Gargoyles, Sabble Arabia Horses, Cats, Birds, Storm Yetis, and Kirins.
The French are clearly OUT NUMBERED, so I see what you mean. Still, she deserves a total brutal beat down from the piss off Alicorn Princesses.
So let me guess, that's the first thing that happens?
11511011
11511011
Hopefully, her anger is aimed at the French Tyrant bitch that started this mess.
She is reminding me of a certain Ex-Princess Bitch from Shield Hero, and Apollyon from For Honor game.
11511033
Never played that game
11511042
Ironic, because your evil French Tyrant is acting similar to the main antagonist of For Honor, see;
https://www.google.com/url?q=https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/Apollyon&sa=U&ved=2ahUKEwjfq6zUi6P9AhXkGzQIHfwsD4sQFnoECAIQAg&usg=AOvVaw19diETPDyf4eJjmXyFS5jl
11511052
My bad, I meant Shield Hero. Never played shield Hero. But For Honor, Oh hell yeah I play. Apollyon is 100% my inspiration for Léone!
11511058
Actually, Shield Hero is a Anime/Manga.
https://www.google.com/url?q=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Rising_of_the_Shield_Hero&sa=U&ved=0ahUKEwjDrrKwl6P9AhUsMDQIHQ9SBYEQ5RMIBA&usg=AOvVaw1Rip5gxm7nCUDtgyRNRCZr
Hmmm, not that enjoyable, everypony seems to have had an idiot-ball attached, and Shining has the biggest one (the pony who has cast a city-wide shield can't use a smaller one to block during a fight) ... also doesn't seem to have any pegusi (nor asks Dash for some high-level recon) ...
[BTW - how many ponies did he bring to this rescue mission?]
11511096
In the comments below, I mentioned I power crept magic, other wise Celestia could just fly over the land and burn the lands with solar magic. The magic had to be weakened a bit othere wise the story would have ended before it could begin.
Shining didn't use his magic to block because... he's bad at multitasking and cant while using his magic to swing his sword.
idk, good point. Though even if he did, wouldn't change much of the story.
I mentioned a handful, near the end I say around 20 guards ponies, not counting the mane 6 minus Twilight plus spike, they weren't expecting to fight a war, they were just looking for Twilight.
11511120
Still idiot-balled ...
Lack of pegasi in an unknown land?
No complaint on lessen magic from any Equestrians (show not tell?)
Armor's specialty is shield/shielding (part of his cutie mark) and he was Captain of the Guard so he should be able to do both ... (plus shield bash is useful when you can change the shield's size)
11511131
I can understand that
Never thought of the pegasi, though I doubt it would impact the story at all.
I'll amend some scenes in the future for him to cast some shields, but don't expect it to change the story at all. I'll include that more when I get to the sequel
11511137
Look the show's writers gave plenty of idiotballs out to the Royal Guard as a whole and to Celly/Lulu to get them out of the way as they couldn't think of a real reason for them not to act competently and do something useful ...
Not asking to change the story but how about simply competence by those that should know what they are doing?
That fight should have been epic with surprises on both sides instead of being as short as it was (not much above roadkill) ...
[Hhe can change the shield's shape and if he sees a beam coming in could change the shape to a parabola to send it back (with some added) ... ]
11511120
With all do respect my friend 🙂, that's the biggest ass pull I've ever heard how far did you have to reach to get that 🤣 still an interesting story though even though I don't appreciate the nursing
11511197
It was very much indeed an ass pull. I had no real reason lol!
11511200
Just to poke holes on this more, just because I feel like I have to I'm sorry. if that was truly the case that shining armor can't multitask. Then why would he use the less resilient of the two why not just use magic and just keep a sword as a sidearm I'm just in case, and also another thing why would any military trained unicorn ever willingly want fight close range,keep your opponent at a distance and pelt them with magic into the resemble Swiss cheese. This should be the first lesson a unicorn learns when fighting 😂 again I don't hate your story I like it quite a lot
I feel like this could be material for a season 10 of MLP. It would be interesting to see humans in the MLP world (Minus Equestria Girls, of course.
Nonetheless, I think this is the first fanfiction involving humans with ponies that I've read, and It seems pretty interesting!
I will follow it!
11718934
Thank you so much for giving it a try! I must admit, it's in a pretty rough state right now. This was created a while ago when I didn't have a lot writing experience. So I am updating with proper paragraphing and wording so I really really apologize if it starts to become harder to read. Like I said, I'm updating it and trying to make it more presentable.