• Member Since 20th Jan, 2021
  • offline last seen 8 hours ago

PegPony


I like writing stories but I'm also a kinky fetishistic loser, that's all you need to know really.

Sequels1

Comments ( 42 )

Having a horse's dick, not to mention the flare, pass through your cervix - while not only being immensely painful - would most likely cause some damage.

going to make you're horse cum before he gets the chance

should be "your".

from the experiences recounted to me by others, horses don't really enjoy butt stuff. it isn't pleasurable for them like it is for us humans.

again, anal stuff is usually not received well by either equines or canines.

So ladies, if you ever ask a guy if he likes pegging and he says no, that means he hasn't tried being pegged, because trust me when I say that all guys love being fucked in the ass once they've tried it

Now you are speaking my language!

Why is there a link in this

10641573
I understand, but with this story I didn't want it to be too realistic because I felt like the story wouldn't have come out the way I wanted it to, so I took some liberties with the realism.

10641580
Thanks for your feedback! Grammar is an unfortunate weakness of mine, but it should be fixed now 😊

As for the horses not liking butt stuff, I see where you're coming from and will take that into consideration in any future stories, though in this particular continuity I'm going to keep that detail in.

10641973
I'm glad you agree! My username should be an obvious hint as to my opinion on the subject πŸ˜‰

10641593
I know, it may be a case of me injecting human traits into animals here, which I will try to avoid in future unless it's relevant to the plot or if I feel it will hinder the narrative if I don't.

10642056
Do you mean the link Fluttershy gives Applejack? It's not a real link so far as I'm aware, I put that in for the sake of making Fluttershy's blog seem more believable, that's why it looks like a real website link 😊

10642412
Ah lol then why did you make it touchable it shows up like click the link

10642420
I noticed that, very odd. I didn't make it clickable though, so I'm not sure what is going on there.

This was kinda funny. For a moment I thought you were going to write her doing a blog post on gerbiling. If that had happened, I'd have pissed myself.

10642438
Well I'm glad you liked it! The idea of gerbilling didn't really enter my mind and I'm sorry to say that any future stories I do probably won't feature that particular practice.

10642521
You know gerbiling never actually happened? It was entirely made-up by the news papers in an attempt to sell copies.

10642708
Really? Wow, that's interesting. Seems like that effort to sell more copies came with a side effect.

10642861
Gerbiling never really took off, there was never a single er report about a doctor pulling a dead small animal out of someone. Snopes did an article about it.
It was created as homophobic propaganda back in the 80's, just like in the early 2000's the whole fake story about rainbow parties was created to make young women feel ashamed about wanting to have sex.

10642915
Ugh, the world sucks sometimes, but it can only get better from now on (hopefully).

10643272
Everyone generally knows that gerbiling is utter horse shit, that doesn't mean I still don't nearly piss myself every time I watch the Lemmiwinks episode of South Park. The whole thing that proved rainbow parties proven to be fake was as the story started going around, a couple of journalists started asking questions of young people in the area the story supposedly popped up from and none of the teens or young adults had even heard of rainbow parties. The same thing with the Tide pod challenge, it started out as a series of memes on 4chan(and we know that on there is othing but a bunch of trolls, pedos, racists and conspiracy theorists) that CBS news blew up to increase their ratings. A bunch of people started looking up reports from poison control centers and er visits and they found that during the time that the Tide pod challenge was supposedly going on, there were almost no reports of teens and young adults being reported with detergent poisoning, just infants, toddlers, the elderly who had dementia and pets.

But back to my original comment, the reason why I said I would have pissed myself if you had written Fluttershy's blog about gerbiling is because I could see a gerbil trying to mount her and go at it.

10643310
I have to agree, that is a very funny image to imagine! Also thank you for an interesting conversation :)

10644071
No prob. It's actually refreshing to talk with someone who would look at the sources I provide and even consider my points, even if they're not willing to accept them. Normally the discussions quickly steer off into...well to avoid unwanted political discourse...Q-Anon territory.

It was an interesting story, I enjoyed the beginning and the epilogue. The blog stuff felt boring, that's probably just my preferences though.

The only major thing that broke my suspension of (dis)belief is the horse entering into a human female's womb by breaching the cervix.
I understand, fictional smut. It's just one of those medical tidbits that annoy me.

Perhaps the use of magic allows this to occur ... actually that would be horrifying. Fluttershy and Applejack can have a horse's penis enter their womb and they give such advice through the internet/blog. Then it results to multiple emergency room reports of female internal bleeding through the vagina + decent probability of death.

Best of luck, eager to see what your sequel will tackle.

-Sky66

10647424
Thank you so much for your feedback! I'm glad you enjoyed my story and are looking forward to the sequel, that makes me feel confident in that I must be doing something right :) I understand completely if you found the blog stuff a little boring, after all it is just basically information. As for the whole womb/cervix thing, I totally get where you're coming from, it is a little bit of a stretch (in more ways than one!), so you'll have to forgive me on that one. It's interesting that you brought up magic, because while this (sort of) technically exists in the EQG universe, magic isn't something I intend to bring into the continuity. But I digress, thank you for reading and enjoying my story, I hope you'll like the sequel :)

There are some inconsistencies with the grammar here. With a lot of your dialogue, they aren't correctly punctuated.

Fluttershy responded with "Well his dick looks way too far in to still be in your pussy, beyond your pussy there is only one place for him to go" she said.

For example, here. I'm pretty sure that you're supposed to put a comma at the end of the speaking bit.

Also, the transitioning seems to be weak. Let's look at the same sentence.

Fluttershy responded with "Well his dick looks way too far in to still be in your pussy, beyond your pussy there is only one place for him to go" she said.

"Fluttershy responded with"? This doesn't sound particularly strong at all, and doesn't feel right when reading the story.

Applejack groaned and said "Rainbow, I don't know if you can tell, but I'm really not in a position right now to go explaining myself!".

No need for a period there. You already included an exclamation mark.

Despite this, Rainbow kept pressing "But...aren't you worried about...I dunno, being caught by the cops or something?" it was after this question that Twilight chipped in.

Spaces after ellipse... please.
Also, there's supposed to be a comma at "Rainbow kept pressing".

"Well Rainbow, there isn't actually a law against bestiality, certainly it is still somewhat taboo and isn't actively encouraged, but it's perfectly legal." Dash turned to Twilight looking surprised, though Fluttershy for some reason didn't even flinch, Twilight realized what she had just implied "I don't know that because I'm interested in engaging in the activity! I was studying our legal system! I study more than just maths and science you know!" clearly offended, though whether it was the unspoken accusation that she might want to fuck an animal or that she didn't know anything outside of maths and science she was offended by was unclear at best.

When read out loud the beginning sentence doesn't flow right. You could replace the comma at the end of bestiality with a period, and capitalize Certainly after that.

though Fluttershy for some reason didn't even flinch,

Period, not a comma.

"I don't know that because I'm interested in engaging in the activity! I was studying our legal system! I study more than just maths and science you know!"

Put a question mark and an exclamation point, it makes more sense in this situation because Twilight is making a statement and asking a question at the same time.

This is just some stuff I saw through my first time reading. I'll try to see if I can proofread the entire chapter later.

The idea certainly is interesting, though. I'll keep reading on.

10647632
Yikes! Thank you so much for taking the time to point out all of those errors, I'm surprised you want to keep reading after that! My grammar when writing is the biggest problem I have, so I really appreciate you bringing these to my attention, I'll be fixing them immediately.

P.S. I'd also like to add an additional thank you, your comment made me go back and check my work on the sequel, part of the reason I hadn't posted it is that I wasn't confident in the grammar. Taking your points into consideration and applying them to the story, I saw plenty of room for improvements. Now that I've made the improvements, the sequel will be ready for readers all the sooner :) I will certainly be looking out for those kind of mistakes again in my future stories, I cannot express my gratitude.

Friend, this fic is brutal, I liked it a lot because you know the fic could be improved (what I would do would be to expand the caps a little more with more things or add others)

A very clear case is that it would be brutal to see how Applejack got caught in the first place "after leaving she could explain what happened to her friends as she had promised to tell them after they helped her" thus adding scenes of how that happened

10658808
Thank you for your feedback! I'm glad you liked it. You do make a very interesting point, I never did provide an explanation as to what happened before she got caught and how she got caught. I know that with every story I write there will be improvements to be made, while I don't intend on adding a "how did Applejack get caught" scene in this story, I will try to ensure that all loose ends are tied up in future stories. Thank You!

10658863
thanks for answering me friend and if it would be great to see how applejack had sex with the horse it would be great to see that

and how I would not like to know if applejack was a virgin before having sex with this horse (see if she was deflowered by the horse)


you know you could add that in part 2 where flutershy and applejack both talk and mention or say how was their first time in bestiality

10658884
Thanks for your feedback! While I haven't written anything specific about Applejack and her horse having sex before they got stuck, that doesn't mean I couldn't do some sort of flashback or conversation between her and Fluttershy about it. I'll keep it mind, but I don't know if I necessarily want to mention it in this series, I might do a separate mini-story about it, but I wouldn't hold your breath.

10680222
It's not meant to, it's not a real site. I know it's clickable, but that wasn't by design, I apologize for the confusion.

10680228
Glad you think so! The point of Fluttershy doing this blog is that she knows what she is doing and wants to share her knowledge.

iji

Seems odd that someone who loves animals so much would be so into an activity that is effectively rape.

An animal cannot give a person informed consent.

10694356
I completely understand your point, for genuine consent to sexual relations to be present both participants must be conscious, fully informed and positive in their desires. That's not just me talking scientifically, that's a quote from Wikipedia describing what sexual consent is. I'm not trying to make excuses here or claim that it isn't rape, I am just reporting the facts and my opinion, in my opinion, the way I have Fluttershy describe how to have sex with animals and the way sex with animals plays out in the sequels, suggests that all of the above requirements for consent have been met, to the point where some of the animals actually initiate copulation of their own volition. No animals are affected negatively in a physical or psychological way in my stories, far from it, the animals are feeling pleasure and are fully consenting to the sex.

10680481
Isn’t there an option somewhere to remove hyperlinks in edit?

10705080
I've had a look and unfortunately, I can't see any way to remove the hyperlink, sorry.

So unless you really want to get pregnant I'd suggest you don't let a horse fuck you every day.

i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/029/433/holdup.jpg

Also, it’s weird seeing fisting mentioned casually. :rainbowderp:

10706010
Yeah, Fluttershy is a very sexual woman in the FGTBFG series :)

You could try looking into the text formatting tools and seeing if there's a way to remove the tag there.

10722347
Had a look, no luck I'm afraid.

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