Granny and the Golem

by My Little Scribbler

Mayhem on the Farm

Granny and the Golem
Chapter 3: Mayhem on the Farm

As she lay on the grass, Red Embers watched as Granny Smith was led away by Barker. “What are we going to do?”

“Can’t you burn through these ropes?” asked Bug-a-Boo.

Red Embers tried desperately to twist her head around to reach the rope. “I can’t get at them at this angle.”

As Bug-a-Boo struggled against the rope, a little wasp flew passed her left ear. It landed onto the grass in front of her face. She leaned over and started whispering to the wasp.

“Are you talking to that wasp?”

“Yes, and I think he can help.”

“He’s a wasp. What can he do?”

Bug-a-Boo watched as the wasp flew away. “You’ll see.”

As the two fillies lay helplessly on the grass, three diamond dogs gathered around them, guarding them.

Granny Smith led Barker toward the watermill, looking from right to left as she searched for a chance to escape. But despite being surrounded by nothing but trees and open fields of grass, there seemed to be no way of escaping with Barker’s blade at her back. They gradually approached the watermill and entered through the open doorway.

“They’re over there,” said Granny Smith solemnly, pointing a hoof at the burlap sack in the corner.

Barker picked up the sack and peaked inside. “Aw, my diamonds.”

With Barker’s back turned, Granny Smith reached over and grabbed a pointed stick from the floor, gripping it with her teeth. She swung the stick, but Barker spun around and grabbed it, ripped it from her grasp, and broke it in half against the cobblestone wall.

“You’re becoming a nuisance,” said Barker. “For that, I’ll kill you now.” He pulled out the knife from his vest.

Granny Smith backed into a corner, frightfully staring at the long blade pointed at her heart. She shut her eyes tight, not wanting to watch her own demise, but then her ears twitched as a strange buzzing sound echoed in the air.

“What the...” As Barker gazed up at the hole in the ceiling, he saw a swarm of wasps coming down toward him. Barker swung his claws, swatting at the wasps. “Not the wasps. Ah, they’re in my eyes.” He swatted and smacked at the stinging insects, fighting desperately to keep them out of his eyes and mouth. As he fought to keep them off, the green diamond fell out of his vest pocket.

Granny Smith snatched the bag and the green diamond and galloped off back to the farm. With the bag in her teeth, she shouted, “Thanks, Boo.”

Once Granny Smith reached the golem, she shoved the green diamond into the golem’s mouth, but the golem did nothing in response.

“Shoot, I need Boo to cast the spell again.”

She turned around to see the diamond dogs gathered on one side of the barn. They were all taking turns smashing against the door with their shoulders, fighting desperately to force it open. The sounds of creaking wood and metal echoed in the air as the diamond dogs came closer and closer to smashing the door open. Lying tied up next to the cellar was Bug-a-Boo and Red Embers squirming on the ground with the ropes bound onto their hooves. Two dogs stood by, watching over the fillies. Granny tucked the burlap sack underneath the golem and, thinking of nothing else to do, she charged toward the dogs.

Two diamond dogs saw Granny Smith fast approaching.

“What’s she doing?” asked one dog.

“She must be crazy if she’s trying to ram us.”

Granny Smith charged toward the dogs with her head lowered like a bull. She charged without slowing down, unafraid of the dogs as they lowered their spears to skewer her. Just as she was going to collide with the sharp spears, she leaped over the dogs with her powerful legs and landed right next to Bug-a-Boo.

“Why you little...” The dog spun around with his spear trained on Granny Smith, but a quick spark of flame from Red Embers’s horn to the ankle set the dog’s foot on fire. “Owowowow.” The dog hopped on one foot in pain. Granny Smith spun around and bucked the dog into his companion behind him, knocking them over like dominos. As the dogs lay there dazed, Granny Smith quickly untied her friends with her teeth.

The dogs got back onto their feet only to have Granny Smith and Red Embers to buck them in the knee caps and Bug-a-Boo swoop down and bat them across their heads.

As the dogs shook off their daze, the three fillies raced toward the golem with the diamond dogs scrambling to chase after them.

“What do we do?” asked Red Embers.

“We need to get into formation,” explained Bug-a-Boo. Once they reached the golem, she grabbed the diamonds from the sack tossed and them to her friends. Once they got into formation, the diamond dogs were already running full charge toward the fillies.

“Oh yenih akem...”

The diamond dogs were half way there.

“...ih akel...”

They were within reach.

“...akem!”

One dog reached over and grabbed Granny Smith by her pigtails. In desperation, she shouted, “Golem, attack every pony!”

With that command, the golem smacked the diamond dog across his temple with a single hoof made of bark and rocks, followed by another kick to the gut to the other diamond dog. Both diamond dogs toppled over howling in pain. The golem’s wooden ears picked up the screech of shattering wood. It turned its head toward the farm where the diamond dogs finally smashed open the cellar door. It charged toward the dogs, bowling them over with ease and tossing them all into haphazard directions. The golem kicked and batted the dogs aside as if they were made of paper.

“What are you doing?” shouted Razor with anger. “Get that thing.”

The dogs scratched the golem with their spears and claws, but their weapons were not much good against a creature made of mud, wood, and rocks. The golem bucked them repeatedly, knocking them aside with hard jabs and kicks. The dogs ran off in all directions, shouting and barking like crazy.

“Where are you going, you fools?” shouted Razor. “Get back here!”

The golem spun around and smacked Razor into the chin, sending him flying into the air with the gold helmet landing onto the ground with a hard plop. As for Razor, it looked to Granny Smith like he had a soft landing on one of the trees deep into the Everfree Forest

Granny Smith and her friends cheered with elation, watching the fight from nearby.

“All right, golem,” shouted Red Embers. “You showed those mutts who’s boss.”

At the sound of her voice, the golem turned toward Red Embers, its coal eyes staring at her with cold murderous intent. It charged at full speed toward Red Embers.

With a yelp of surprise, Red Embers dodged out of the way of the rampaging golem as it nearly trampled her.

“Hey, what's it doing?” asked Granny Smith. “Why’s it attacking Red?”

“What did you tell it?” asked Bug-a-Boo.

“I told it to attack every pony.”

“Uh-oh.”

“Whatcha mean ‘uh-oh?’”

“A golem will follow every command it hears and it will not stop unless it fulfills the request.”

“So?”

“So, it follows every command it gets by the letter.”

Red Embers was dodging the golem’s attacks, “Well, then stop attacking.” The golem continued to swing its hooves at Red Embers. “I said STOP.”

“I told you,” said Bug-a-Boo. “It’ll not stop until it has fulfilled the command.”

The golem spun its head around and charged toward Bug-a-Boo. She rocketed off the ground and over the golem, her wings buzzing loudly. As the golem stopped to turn around, it stared intently at the forest. Its coal eyes could see the Apple Family, bound and helpless outside of the Everfree Forest.

“Oh no, it’s after my family,” said Granny Smith. “We have to find those diamonds.”

“But where did we drop them?” asked Bug-a-Boo.

As the fillies searched frantically for the diamonds, the golem charged.

Granny Smith leaped onto the golem’s back, gripping it around the neck. She reached for the mouth, but the golem’s mouth was held firmly shut. Her hoof slipped and as she held on to the golem’s neck for dear life, she found herself dangling over the ground, bouncing painfully against the golem’s front.

The golem was seconds away from colliding with the Apples as they squirmed to get away.

As Granny Smith hung there, she saw the writing on the golem’s forehead. She blindly thrust her hoof forward, and smashed off a part of the word with a soft crack.

The golem abruptly stopped, throwing Granny Smith off it and landing right into Pokey Oak’s lap.

Red Embers and Bug-a-Boo sprinted to a halt next to Granny Smith.

“Are you all right?” asked Red Embers.

“I’m fine thanks to papa,” said Granny Smith as she pulled off the gag on Pokey Oaks. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“I’m just glad I had a light lunch,” groaned Pokey Oaks.

The fillies gathered around the Apples and untied them. Once they were free, Pokey Oaks examined the golem.

“What is this thing?” he asked.

“It’s a golem,” said Granny Smith.

“What stopped it?” asked Pokey Oaks.

“We don’t know,” said Red Embers. “It stopped just as we saw the diamonds, so we didn’t do anything and I don’t think it’s far enough away form the diamonds to stop it.”

Bug-a-Boo hovered over the golem, examining the damage on its face. “Oh, that’s funny.”

“What is?” asked Granny Smith.

“Remember when I said that the word I wrote on the forehead reads ‘emet’ which, in olden Equestrian, means ‘reality?’”

“Yeah,” said Granny Smith.

“You ripped off one of the letters so it now it reads ‘met.’”

“What does that mean?”

Bug-a-Boo let out a chuckle before speaking. “It means ‘dead.’”

There was a moment of pause before the implications of this discovery hit them, causing everyone to burst out laughing.

As Princess Celestia lowered the sun in the distance, the whole Apple Family, as well as Red Embers and Bug-a-Boo, gathered around a picnic table set up just outside of the apple orchard.

Bug-a-Boo bit down into a slice of bread with some zap apple jam spread on top. “Yummy, this is the best zap apple jam I’ve ever tasted.”

Sew n’ Sow cut off a slice of bread, put some jam on it, and handed it over to Red Embers. “Here ya go, dearie.”

Red Embers picked up the slice of bread with an irritated expression on her face.

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing.” Red Embers held the piece of bread over her horn. From the tip of her horn, she shot a blast of flame that cooked the underside of the bread. “I prefer my bread toasted.” She bit into the bread, humming with joy at the taste of it.

“Ya did good out there,” said Pokey Oaks as he patted Granny Smith on the back.

“Aw shucks, I can’t take all the credit.”

“But what if those dogs come back?” said Sew n’ Sow, shaking with fright.

“That’s okay,” said Granny Smith. “I think our new scarecrow will keep the dogs away.”

From outside of the farm, there was a single pony-shaped statue standing in watch and waiting. Although it could not move, it was just as imposing as any sentry. It just stood there, a reminder of what happened the last time some fool tried to steal from the Apple Family.

The End

Comments

[bahatumay]

“Not the wasps. Ah, they’re in my eyes.”

I would be freaking out a lot more if there were wasps in my eyes. Just sayin'.

I liked the resolution, especially the wordplay.
And once again we learn--don't mess with the Apple family.