• Member Since 18th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

My Little Scribbler


E

In an alternate universe, the brony community takes on a new level of wonder and mockery in the eyes of the media as bronies and pegasisters are blessed with their own little pony friends who magically appear before them. However, Erik, a newcomer to the herd, is too afraid to show off his pony, hiding her away. However, despite the fear of ridicule and ostracism, Erik must learn that he should not have to hide his love for the show, and it gets easier when you have a pony that will stick with you through every step of the way.

The picture belongs to Gamma Delta from Equestria Daily. It can be found under Drawfriend #379.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 152 )

This was cute and good I favorite and give you a thumb.

Will be featured. I love this story it's great...

I wish we got ponies when we joined the herd.

Cute and interesting.

Watching to see where you go from here.

Very good. :eeyup: Really good one shot, but i think it would've been cool if you made it longer; or something. Never the less, fantastic story. :rainbowdetermined2:

Well, isn't this an interesting premise! I'm kindof disappointed that it's only one chapter; it seems like you could easily expand on this!

D'awwwwwwww....... That is so awesome. You rule author person and for that get a: :pinkiehappy:. Enjoy it and show it with pride!

Interesting..... Now if only this were in real life.

I enjoyed the concept, but the the story was predictable, and lack luster. The jokes weren't delivered as well as they could have been.

What irked me the most is that the characters were all so, one dimensional. I didn't feel sympathetic to David or Erik. they feel like paper cut outs of people. And all the reporters, scientists, etc are flimsy strawmen.

The conflict and moral of the story are just not very good. "Join the herd, ignore haters" isn't just very deep or meaningful.

You're trying to be both silly and serious at the same time. given the premise, I'd go with the silly. This would have been a good 'random' fic with proper handling. If you erased the brony culture aspect of it, it would have been a good serious fic.

the last thing is the constant mentionng of how the ponies shouldn't be real. It doesn't really add much to the story, and takes away from the funny. Read Kafka's Metamorphosis . The Absurdism works because while weird shit happens, no one stops to question it, or they've just accepted it and try to carry one with life.

props for having a novel premise, and an all right story. the dialogue, prose and characters need work. A couple jokes feel shoe-horned in.

Oh gosh, I wish this could happen. Although, most bronies would. I really, really enjoyed this. I really hope you'll continue to write this.:twilightsmile:

if this were only true

I got a good lagh a few times. the riping on the cathloc priest made me loose my shit.
I gues if I could critises the wrighting I would say it lacks a little of evrything: fluint diloug, descriptive detail, interesting word choice, ect..
but dman it, good job with the story :)
It was funny andcute. I was expectig more of a romance though.
more thwn once I said out loud "what the fuck am I reading?"
=]
wether thts a good thing or a bad thing;you decide ;)
:heart:

Aww... I want my own pony now. Nicely done. :twilightsmile:

I'm adding this to my later list. From what I've heard, it's an interesting idea, but cobbled together. Don't make the mistake of making a new concept, and thinking it will carry your story. Just trust me on that.:ajsleepy:

ah the good book... such good times...

nice story btw.

Short, but awesome.

This is really well done. Oh how I wish this would happen! I would love to have my own little pony. At least one like the ones from the show. But again one of the best oneshots I've read.

I actually don't think Catholics would react that harshly. I've had a few priests as teachers, and they try not to say something is a direct work of God or the devil unless there's no other possible explanation.
Of course, in this case there really isn't.

Now, I'm off to go be sad in the corner because I don't have a little pony. Yet.

i don't think it'd be a good idea could get real life my little ponies:pinkiegasp:
because we'd all die from joygasms and diabeties:pinkiehappy::rainbowlaugh:

a great little fic. shame to see it as a one shot though...oh well, thumbs and fav!

I'm still waiting for my little pony to appear. It should be any moment now...

i want my little pony

Before I read, I need to get this out of my system:

DEAR GOD, THAT PICTURE IS ADORABLE.

Oh dude this is amazing. :pinkiehappy: Written very well and flowed nicely. I want a pony so bad now and I would love her/him (idc) until end of time. :twilightsheepish:

Those that disliked it. What the hell is wrong with you? Did you even read the story?!?!

Interesting...very very interesting. I've never come across this idea before and would love to see more of it.

That's all well and good...

But where's my buckin' pony‽ :flutterrage:

714122
Very observant of you. I suppose I could get mad at you for criticizing my story, :twilightangry2: although to be honest, I freely admit this isn’t my best work. Basically, I intended this fanfic to be a what-if story, exploring what might happen to a closet brony if put into a situation where he can’t hide his love of the show because there’s a pony hanging around to expose him. Like all the other one shots I have on this account, this fanfic is just an experiment: me trying something I haven’t done before.

As for ways I can make it better, I really like your absurdist comedy idea. I wish I’d thought of it. However, when I was writing the story, my intention was to make a sort of slice-of-life comedy, although this fanfic didn’t lend itself very well to jokes in that regard or at least not without resorting to clichés.

While I’ll admit I’m not hugely happy with the results, I can’t say it is one of my worst fanfics. It’s just a cute idea with a fairly wholesome story.

714450
I agree, that's why I chose that picture.

D'awwww.

Damn it. Now I need to hug something!

So... every brony gets a pony based on their childhood interests? That's...
That's freaking adorable. This is a really cute idea. I love it! :heart:
I suddenly feel the need to create my very own thematic equine familiar!
And that penultimate thought is the truest thing I've ever read. Why let life get you down when there's so much to smile at? :twilightsmile:

... um ...

DO WANT!:twilightsmile:

Well done. Yes, well done indeed.

I watched all the episodes, read lots of fics, posted at ponychan and I treat fimfiction and eqdaily as important daily sustenance - I'm sure I deserve a pony now: )

Cons: Grammar problems, and occasionally akward dialoue.
Pros: Fantastic story, identifiable characters, and a yearning for more. Good job.

That was fucking retarded.

715113

What deep and utterly detailed criticism from you, young Padawan. :trixieshiftright:

I respect your right to not like something. But at least, for Celestia's sake, explain to the author WHY you thought "That was fucking retarded". Honestly, a little common courtesy improves us all.

I'll agree with the previous comments in that the flow of the story itself was shaky. But the concept... *sighs blissfully* Maybe it's just the wish-fulfillment of having a "My Little Pony" or maybe its the idea that it could be real. The idea of having a "significant" other, especially based on our childhood interests... so completely and utterly appealing. I can definitely see this theme spiraling into something more.

I mean, take a look at Conversion Bureau.

All in all, decent writing, great idea.

715567
No, that's a terrible idea. Why would you want a creepy pony following you around against your will?

Damn,if some priest told shit to me like that,I'd confront him straight with a bible. The bible never said any of that shit. Then I'll hit him with it. Who's with me?

715875

Interesting enough, I'd actually think the Catholic Priests would be trying to get ponies themselves. Alot easier to draw kids to you if you have a pony instead of candy. :facehoof: Ugh, why did I write that? I was catholic once myself, I should have a little more respect...

Although the argument sounded more akin to a Holy Roller than the Catholics. Though I lost it when "The Four Horsemen of the Apocolypse will ride Ponies" came up.

715580 If you actually are a Brony than you certainly aren't acting like one. The hope and idea of having your own little pony may be real and is one mans opinion that is obviously supported by many others including myself. I believe that many things in our world our possible and that gives me hope and faith. Whether its MLP related or not. This is a Brony/Pegasister based community and if you are one than you better act like it. :derpytongue2:
BTW Author, Great story and I loved reading it. It could be expanded but I do love a great oneshot! :rainbowkiss:

716425
Just because I watch a show doesn't mean I want a part of that show irl, that would be weird.

Also I'm not a brony. (love technicalities)

716450 Thats quite confusing. I understand that you're obviously not as obsessed and in love with it as myself and many others but if you don't like it than why do you register an account on a fanfic site dedicated towards the show? And bother to read a story related to the show?:rainbowhuh:

Well, pretty original if you ask me, i like original fics, so it shall be tracked. Style isn't bad, but you should work on character development.

--That's freak part---
But honestly, are you some kind of those strange atheists on warpath against church? Last time I checked priest like this one were living in 12th century. Unless America is not so enlightened as their citezens think.
The crappy thing is that you're writing about religion in pony fic, religions are either rarely mentioned, or purposefully missed, because we don't want such flamewars here, and you are igiting one. I for example feel insulted that you are creating image of catholic priest especially one in TV show as some kind of dark ages zealot. Of course that church would send there someone with real theology doctorate woho have some idea about topic at least, no some kind of freak. We have slightly similar priest nearby, and guess what, he is on edge of excomunnication for his activity. And he is even half as bad as yours. Unless american church allows such pepole to respresent them in TV. Try insult Mahomet and this comment section would burn in their flame, and you may get some unwanted visit. Of course insulting christians is the safest option right? ]

What? I had to say something, either there aren't any catholics, or they are so called catholics, without any will do defend themselves. I'm just pissed on treatment like this, just saying:) We hand't any big scandal with pedophiles in Europe since i can remember, maybe rare single cases, but they are humans too, anyone can have problems with mind right? Because some guys have problems, you can't say that all priests and followers are evil pedophiles. I guess I'll never understand american mindset.

i've hope that we won't start some stupid flamewar here, I've said what I wanted to say, so you shouldn't be dissapointed. Looking forward next chapter.

716472
I like the show but I'm not a brony.

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