Linger

by Kronos Frostwind

Bonus: Escape From Ponyville General

~Linger~

Escape From Ponyville General

“Yeah, I’m good. I hate being in a hospital. I’d really like to leave, like, right now.” Satin said, rubbing his hooves together, “Here’s the plan, now that we have you girls as a resource. You guys need to create some sort of distraction. I’m thinking something big, a medical mishap. It needs to be flashy though, but no fires. Then me and Kro will make our daring escape, disguised as nurses. I don’t know where we’ll get the outfits, but we’ll figure that out on the fly.” There was a stunned silence for a few moments after Satin stopped.

It... It’s GENIUS!

Rainbow Dash began to psych herself up for the catastrophe she would soon create before...

“O-or we could jump out the window... If you want to...”

Well... The fun of escaping is dead now.

“But... where’s the fun in that?” I asked, downtrodden.

“There is no fun in that! As stallions, we must go out of our way to have the most possible fun and with that I crush your weak argument!” Satin exclaimed as he collected Kevin.

Fluttershy looked towards the ground sadly, “O-okay.”

I raised my head, a look of utter determination on my face, “Sorry, Flutters, but this is happening!”

Satin looked down at his forehoof and grinned, “Synchronize your watches, girls.”

I looked down at my left forehoof to see a black watch, “I have a watch?”

Fluttershy and Dash wore similar looks of confusion as they stared at their own watches.

Satin glared at me for a moment, “Don’t question it. On my mark!”

With that, he began counting down, as he hit zero, four simultaneous beeps were heard as our watches synchronized.

“Right then RD, the first part of the plan is in your hooves.” As she turned, he grabbed the edge of her silver trench coat, “And remember, flashy but not dangerous.” She smiled as she nodded in approval before leaving the room.

Wait, when did she get a trench coat... WHEN DID I GET A TRENCH COAT!?

In place of my chef’s coat was a pure white trench coat.

“I can see you questioning it, stop it. Now second order of business, strip.” Satin said as he took off his own black trench, leaving on his pair of sunglasses.

Sunglasses? But where did, oh buck it...

I shrugged and yanked off my trench coat by the neck, flourishing it off to the side.

Fluttershy turned a crimson red as we both undressed in her general vicinity and then she slowly began to take off her hot pink trench too.

“You know you don’t necessarily have to take off your coat, we’re only doing it so we can disguise ourselves as nurses, doctors, or whatever other costumes we can find later on.” Satin says as he finished disrobing.

“Did you just convince her to keep clothing on? Didn’t know you swung that way, buddy.” I whispered to him.

“Right, nevermind. Take it off.” He quickly added.

Satin threw himself against the wall next to the door as he carefully spied out of it and motioned Fluttershy and I forward.

I slid into cover behind the opposite wall, and Fluttershy followed suit behind me. "So, how’ll we know when to go?”

As I spoke those words, a pair of nurses ran by our door, yelling, “There’s a fire in the cafeteria!”

Satin facehoofed... hard, “I told that mare, nothing dangerous!” He hissed through gritted teeth.

I chuckled half-heartedly, “At least she’s excited? Come on, let’s check the nurses’ station for those uniforms!”

We pushed forward against the wave of ponies trying to help with the ‘fire’. Making it to the nurses station without too much trouble.

It was completely abandoned, everything was going according to plan... We opened the cabinet that was supposed to hold the uniforms and... there was only one left.

Satin glared at me before raising his hoof expectantly.

I cocked a brow, “What?”

He rolled his eyes as if it were obvious, “Rock, paper, scissors!”

I was at a loss for words for a moment, “That’s... not even possible anymore...”

He stared at his hooves for a moment as he meaningfully closed his eyes, “Fine, but turn around while I put it on.” He said defeatedly.

I chuckled teasingly, “Fine, be quick about it.”

“Fluttershy! Keep guard as I put this skirt on!” Satin ordered from behind my back. She saluted as she took a defensive stance. “Right then, we need a different disguise for your unattractive black flank. What comes to mind, just grab a wheelchair, quick and easy, but effective.”

I saw a doctor’s coat hanging on a hook off to the side, and threw it over my shoulders, “Buck you, I got a PhD!”

Fluttershy looked at me, awestruck, “Really?”

I chuckled briefly, “Buck no, I’ve just always wanted to wear a doctor’s coat!”

Satin appeared in my field of vision, fully attired in a nurses outfit; hat, coat, and skirt.

“Right then, Dash is expecting us in the lobby in,” He checked his watch, “A minute ago. We need to go.”

“When did we set...” I started, only to be interrupted Satin.

“You’d know if you had paid attention!” He threw back as we made our way to the stairs. We were nearly there as three of the largest orderlies I had ever seen stepped in our path and the music began to play.

The world seemed to fade into a pixely darkness before fading back in, I was in the center of the hall, Fluttershy at my left, Satin to my right. The orderlies stood roughly fifteen feet away from us, side-by-side.

I took the first move, rushing towards the right-most orderly as I screamed my battle cry, "IN THE NAME OF MEANINGLESS BATTLE!". As I closed in on him, I spun on my fore-hooves and lashed out with my rear-hooves, landing a square hit on his face before rushing back to my team.

Fluttershy went next, throwing a red orb to the ground and stomping on it, causing a small green smokescreen to materialize around her hoof. As the smoke dissipated the sound of clawed feet began echoing down the halls, before I could turn around. Angel rushed by me, riding atop a large long-legged yellow bird. The bird jumped over the center orderly pecking down at his head before landing and kicking him in the flank before running away again. The orderly fell to the ground, a deep whooshing of air was heard as he disappeared into nothing.

Next were the orderlies, they both charged towards Satin, one jumped on his head and over him as the other uppercutted him, lifting him off the ground as the other bucked him back down. Both rushed back away from us as Satin fell to his knees in pain. Satin took a step forward as his horn ignited with a white aura, tinged green. There was a brief glow of light around him as he stood back to his feet with a grin.

“Nobody fucks with the white mage!” He announced confidently.

I took my run at the orderly I had attacked previously, sweeping my rear hoof under his, dropping him to the ground before I jumped back, elbowing him in the face. He fell to the ground and disappeared as I ran back to my spot. Next, Fluttershy ran by me, before delivering a quick kick to Satin’s shins and returning to her spot. I stared at her, astonished for a moment.

“Ow, why?!?!?!” Satin shouted in pain.

“S-sorry, I selected the wrong target...”

He murmured, “Bucking scrub...” as he turned back to the remaining orderly.

The orderly charged me, I jumped to the side, instinctually, as he tried to buck me in the chest. I heard him grumble something about poor accuracy as he galloped back to his position.

“Heh heh heh, I was saving this for you, you waste of Mana!” Satin’s horn glowed white again as the orderly, surrounded by an aura and lifted into the air as his body contorted into something different... something smaller.

I grinned evilly and charged him, grabbing his mane in my teeth and throwing him into the air, before turning to buck him out of the air I heard Fluttershy shout, “NO, he’s just a colt!” The interruption distracted me, causing me to miss him completely. I groaned as I returned next to Fluttershy, who waited, not doing anything.

The colt-sized orderly took advantage of this and galloped over to her before jumping on her back, ripping and biting at her mane. She shrieked as she threw him back to his place, glaring with the fury only she could hold. She stomped on another red orb causing the ground to split under the orderly. He was yanked into the ground by a flaming, horned dog whose growl spoke of his sinister plans for the poor little colt-stallion. As he was taken, screaming into the pits of Tartarus, where surely his soul would be devoured from his very body, the ground sealed itself, returning to its original state.

We both stared, terrified, at Fluttershy as the happy victory music played in the background and we both swore to never, ever, EVER piss her off... ever.

We collected our loot, some bits and a couple of weak healing potions, as we hurried down the stairs. We were late, and that battle really didn’t help our situation.

We burst through the doors to the lobby, only to find RD in the clutches of our greatest enemy, Doctor Stable.

“Planning to escape I see!” His thick Trottingham finally bleeding through. He nonchalantly threw RD’s unconscious body towards us by the collar of her trench coat.

He began to give a slow clap, “Bravo, your plan was nearly flawless, I daresay you’d have escaped had she been a bit faster. Oh, and please don’t concede, it has been ages since I’ve had the chance to let loose.” He began to chuckle that ominous chuckle as the world slowly broke away into blackness, reconfiguring us into battle position, as sinister music began to play.

I saw Satin standing on my right, but in Fluttershy’s place at my left side, was the unconscious form of Rainbow Dash. He began cackling maliciously as he began floating into the air. He ceased his ascent as four wings materialized and unfolded from behind his back, firing beams of light into the sky. The beams began to arc down bombarding us with explosions of light. Satin and I crouched to the ground, too weak to stand.

Satin began charging holy magic into his horn, releasing it on Dash. She stood up and glared at the doctor angrily before charging him. She jumped at him, preparing to uppercut him, her hoof shrouded in pure energy. As she closed in, she extended her hoof and made the connection square in the... Oh, Luna, WHY!? He fell to the ground, holding... himself, as he screamed. He began to slowly disappear, coins flying out of him, scattering in every direction.

“I wanted to win... just not in this way... never in this way.” Satin said flatly with tears in his eyes.

“...I pity him more than the colt-stallion Fluttershy had dragged into tartarus... That was horrible!” I added, solemnly.

A deep, booming voice began to speak as we walked out of the hospital, “And with that, our heroes had escaped from the soul crushing torture that was waiting to be discharged from the hospital. Who knows what fate has in store for them, next time on Linger.”

A/N: I'm so sorry... I'm so very sorry... Leave a comment below if you wish. I'm curious to see some of the reactions, personally I found this hysterical.

Comments

[CaptainSanchez]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

[Kintra]

I fucking giggled. DAMN MEEEEE!

[Final_Draft]

...?

This... I don't even... wait what?