Luna invites Twilight for a night of organizing the old Canterlot library, but when Luna finds a journal from the past will Twilight get more than she bargained for?
In the end we are like the paint brush, spread across the canvas of life until we can no longer paint.
Luna invites Twilight for a night of organizing the old Canterlot library, but when Luna finds a journal from the past will Twilight get more than she bargained for?
There were quite a few missing commas and scattered mistakes (notably when Twilight asks how she can be wrong and "write"), but a mildly intriguing concept.
1228234 I'm not all that great with punctuation...
You'd think Luna would, ya know, warn a pony before sending them several thousand years back in-time/into a journal/into a hyper-realistic dream state. By the by, who is supposed to be speaking in the first paragraph? Luna? The Narrator? Luna the Narrator? I can't decide if it should be in quotes, italics or otherwise, I feel like you can do something stylistically to signify the time jump.
Good concept, though, carry on!
1239452 It's supposed to be the narrator and your right it should be in italics I'll fix that now
I'm not really sure about this chapter it seems a bit sketchy in my eyes but that might just be me *shurg*
1774304 Thank you so much for the awesome critique
1808259 Right that... the whole meat thing. It has something to do with crops not growing in extreme cold and hopefully chapter 4 will explain it all
1959347 dass why I said chapter 4 will explain stuff that was chapter 3 since I don't count the prolugue as an actual chapter