• Member Since 4th Jul, 2018
  • offline last seen Dec 2nd, 2019

MusicRocks807


18 yrs old / uk / studying english and creative writing at uni / also active(ish) over on fanfiction.net / hopeless romantic

T
Source

Fluttershy is going to die one day. So will the rest of Discord's friends - he knows this, and is incredibly unhappy about it.

The time comes and goes and the world ends. Then Discord meets a young dragon girl with yellow scales and pink spines, and the world begins again. And again and again and again...

Teen for mentions of sex and death, but nothing graphic.
Cover image is just a screenshot from "Keep Calm and Flutter On"

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 12 )

This has been on my mind quite a bit. I do like depictions of him remaining reformed after Fluttershy's death, as after A Matter of Principals, I often fear he'll go Emo and regress again.

Also, I'm not sure whether changelings are immortal or Chrysalis only survived her fall and the explosion of her throne because she was super-powered by the love she'd consumed, but dragons can live for over a thousand years so Smolder will outlive Sandbar, Gallus, Yona, Silverstream, and maybe Ocellus.

One thing though: The writers said Twilight will not outlive her friends. She and Cadance aren't immortal like Celestia and Luna are, for reasons unknown. But, no reason one can't write an alt. universe one where they are. (like how many depict the Dazzlings still alive when it's more likely they suffered No Immortal Inertia, even by the newly-established time ratio they'd still have been humans for over 300 years)

I love it I love it I love love love it.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has considered the reincarnation idea. I myself wrote a small fluttercord fic, in which Fluttershy is actually a reincarnation of a butterfly.

It pleases me that we have written similar stories, at you are such an excellent writer!

Also please refer to my obnoxious yet well-meant comment on your profile, hohoho~!

Additional comment: I realized that as nice as this review is, I did not add my favorite details of the fic itself, which was always my favorite part of reviews for my own stories.

I really thought it was clever to use a Changeling as one of her reincarnations, especially since it's the last one we get to read about. It was interesting how different she was personality-wise, but she still felt insecure about being herself,
Especially if it doesn't make her loved ones happ. ... which is still a central trait that connects her with her former selves. It also was a great way to show how much Discord has learned since reforming-by assuring her that she can be herself, she doesn't have to be Fluttershy.

I also like how you also make plenty of examples of Discord's other thriving friendships, with Twilight and Celestia and Spike and such. I always appreciate romance fics still making room to show the importance of friendship--especially for this show, obviously!

And honestly, I just enjoy your writing style. It's lovely and thoughtful and sometimes poetic without trying too hard. And you are very good at something I tend to fail in, which is showing rather than telling. You know what details are important and which ones aren't.

Keep writing, my friend. I think you will go far if you do and wish to go in that direction.

9467089
I think canonically there’s probably a fair chance he could regress, especially if we’re taking Matter of Principals into account - but I like to hope he understands and values friendship enough now to get through it, with some help from the others.

I’m headcanoning that Chrysalis survived either through magic or increased strength as a former royal, and changelings themselves aren’t immortal. Admittedly little basis for that though; it would make sense if they are, considering their transformation magic might reverse age/injuries. As for Twilight and Cadence, let’s just go with mild au - but thanks for letting me know about that, i hadn’t come across that fact before!

9467234
Ooh, I didn’t realize you’d written a reincarnation story too! Not sure how I missed that one, but I can’t wait to read it!

Thank you for the lovely review! I’m glad the changeling one turned out alright; I wanted to show some variety between them so I wasn’t just writing Fluttershy under four different names, but I wasn’t sure if she was too far from home.

And I’m glad Discord came across well too! My personal headcanon is that he understands friendship enough now to survive Fluttershy’s death, but that he would need to lean on his other friends to get through it at first. Friendship always wins in this show, and it doesn’t feel right to leave it out of a story.

The feedback on the writing itself means so much, thank you! It’s great to hear that it’s paying off, especially from someone who writes as well as you :)

WOW!!!!!your word is always shock me because of its beauty!!!!
is a sad and romantic story!!!i love it !!!!!reincarnation is a good idea about fluttercord!!!
and i can see how powerful of friendship ,because discord had try his best to live even after fluttershy's death.
i am so glad that i can see your story again!!!
please going on!!!i can't wait to see more!!

Not the best written story I've read, but overall, it's pretty good.

The story itself is not the greatest, but it does what it was supposed to do very well. I feel as if this story wasn't meant to make the audience go "Wow!"

It's a cute little story that introduces a ton of well thought out theories and headcanons.

Nevertheless, the story was enjoyable

Signing out, VShuffler42

9469586
Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed :)

9469712
Yeah, I think this comes across more as exploring the concept than a completely fleshed-out study of it. Any suggestions for how I can improve it from a reader's perspective? Like any particular elements of the writing that didn't quite work?

9470259
I'll get back to you tomorrow. Since I won't be able to send the message tonight, because at home, I am not allowed to use the internet without having all my homework done. Mind you, I will still write it tonight. But you will not receive it until tomorrow.

Now having said that, I am going to reread the story and get to work.

Signing out, VShuffler42

9470413
9470259
Hello. First off, I would like to apologize for being so extremely late. It took longer to write than expected because I have been having quite a hectic week. Combine that with the fact that I lost progress and had to restart... twice. So that's fun.

Because this is now the third time I am doing this, I am now officially slightly frustrated and annoyed, this is a somewhat shorter version of the original. That being said, however, if you want me to go over the story with you later, just PM me and I will get back to you at some point.

To put it simply, this story leaves stuff out. It doesn't answer some questions as to why or how any of it is happening. Or course, this stuff deals a lot with the world-building which would, for example, explain how Equestria protected itself from threats with the Elements of Harmony gone? This story shows us many intriguing theories, ideas, and headcanons all wrapped up in one, but it doesn't take the time to really delve into what each one means. Now it does better than many other stories but it still has its moments.

To put it even more simply, it feels like a slideshow of snippets. I have nothing wrong with the story is as the story itself is very good. It is written quite well, and it achieves its purpose effectively. I am just somewhat dissatisfied with what the story could have been. It introduces a world where reincarnation and immortality exist at the same time! There is so much you can do with that, that it feels almost disappointing when those aspects weren't explored. It left me with more questions than resolve when the story ended.

While I am aware not every story has to have a ton of world-building and/or a lot of details to the why and the how, even if one may really really want it, it feels even more aggravating when a story introduces a lot of different interesting theories and ideas and melds them together to something really intriguing and excitingly awesome and then doesn't explain it. It leaves us hanging.

So while the individual story you told was really good, there are so many details, so many different perspectives, and so many other stories that you could run with but chose to abandon, that the story feels almost ... small.

If you had made this an longer story where it explored the emotions Discord had felt throughout each relationship, and how he struggles at first with feeling like he might be abandoning Fluttershy and then afterword how he struggles with the fact that they (the reincarnations) all might be the same person. While, at the same time, they are trying to determine the reasons for her repetitive reincarnation. Are the rest of the EoH are affected? If so, where are they? Did Fluttershy's constant closeness to Discord's chaos magic affect why she reincarnated? Etc, etc..., I feel as if this story could been even better.

As you can see, there is so you could have done, but didn't. This doesn't ruin the story you told, it just left me wanting more. It didn't leave me satisfied with what little you had given. As such, if you make a sequel or continuation of this universe, I would love for you to make me aware.

I hope you understand.

Though I must say, the fact you ended the story on a Changeling, I feel, was quite genius. It puts an interesting twist on the tale.

Having taken too much time,
Signing out, VShuffler42

Sweetie this was absolutely wonderful but you should know that Kalama sounds close to the Filipino word 'kalma', which means calm. I thought it very fitting for her.

I AM BAWLING LIKE A GODDAMN BABY. :fluttercry: Seriously. Hit me right in the feels. This story was so good, I will probably carry around the feelings it induced for days to come.

This was a fascinating read, and I really loved the bittersweet moments sprinkled in there.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!