Ash, a recently deceased man, wakes up in a strange realm with a strange figure claiming to be 'God' nearby. He soon finds himself offered a chance at a new life under one condition; join the game and play by the rules.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This is just plain adorable and wholesome with a touch of world building. Lovely.
Will the ponies have access to a single school each and he has to teach them?
Very good chapter and I am starting to think you have taken a liking to Ash x Luna
Though I have to point out one mistake:
Along was used three times AND kind of made the sentence not flow right, It's just a wording Flub but will catch even the most Novice of writers eye.
I also have a feeling that crowd was a bad omen, I can't wait to see what the nobles are planning
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You'll have to wait and see what the future holds!
9417447
I know I always say to thank Doctor Vux for editing, but he deserves special recognition in this chapter. There were three parts that came off really strangely and, due to his help, I was able to make them much more readable. This chapter was meant to achieve the effect you noticed and it's only because of him that it happened.
9417474
Fixed! Thanks for pointing that out as the good Doctor and I were more focused on fixing the parts of the chapter I horrifically butchered than simple repetition. As for the crowd, I'm not going to reveal whether that was planned or just an excuse to make Luna teleport so I could skip a thousand words of dialogue. I'll let you know this; the answer is probably not what you expect.
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I am coming to Expect the Unexpected from you
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That'll be a damn good thing to expect for future chapters. Trust me.
My wrists got really sore until I bought one of those wavy ergonomic keyboards that take up a ton of room and clack like a motherbucker plying his trade in the middle of a class for tapdancers.
It makes noise that drives others to distraction, but it's very comfortable and my wrists hardly bother me at all when I use it. It feels so much more natural and comfortable to use that I hate going back to standard ones. They aren't very expensive, at least basic ones aren't.
9417577
I like the sound an feel of the clacky keyboards, it just feels satisfying for me. This my personal opinion of course, just like how you stated yours. I hope you don’t have any further wrist troubles.
Interesting fuct: humans are no longer considered the only sentient species on the planet, dolphins now also count
9417518
Expect the unexpected, then it will be expected.
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Until it's so expected that you can't even expect it because you're expecting the unexpected.
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Fun fact! Most animals are sentient, but only humans are sapient. Sorry for the sarcasm, but I couldn't resist.
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Yeah, but I'm a tablet with a magnetic keyboard, not a bluetooth or wire one. I can't change them out, unfortunately.
9417587
Not yet!
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Words that sounds like madness truly makes sense.
Have we gotten to the point were ‘expected’ starts to not sound right because we used it so much?
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Fun fact! That's referred to as semantic satiation! Don't you feel semantically satiated now that you know the semantic definition of semantic satiation? (I did that to my friends and they all hated me for it.)
Edit: It was actually my editor, Doctor Vux, who made me aware of that term. I was so thankful for it because I had never known what it was called.
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Oof, consider me subdued. I have been curious about that type of situation but I did not know it had a word/words to define such a situation. I yield for the sake of time, else we would likely go on longer into the night.
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I'm running a D&D campaign over Discord right now so I'll be up longer anyway, then I plan to write some more of the next chapter after that.
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*legasp* You run D&D?!?!?!? When and can I join?!!?!? I have never played but I have always wanted to and am very friendless and alone.........quickmeme.com/img/f6/f6b88f4e7716d4490a6fa6d7a88a5326296386ab673fdf460b25776bfa77e3b9.jpg
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Okay, I was thinking a song because I was trying to put a tune to it. What story, though?
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Dude... Your characters dream before displacement was the same as my characters... that's freaky!
Literally, my guy Simon wanted to be a game designer, I even plan for one or two of his tribes he made up to actually appear in his fic!
Thats not true he is interested, it's just that he is from a monogamist society. So it'll take some time for him to adapt to the polygamist society he now finds himself in.