The Conversion Bureau: Green Tea

by Da Bunnana King

Chapter One: Brand new day

The Conversion Bureau: Green Tea; The Rewrite
~ ~ ~
Da Bunnana King

Chapter One: Brand new day

= = = = =

I was there, flying. Soaring through the clouds at a breakneck speeds without a care in the world. Flying through the endless field of clouds, as I twisted and weaved through them. I was weightless; I felt only the cool breeze on my face, the cold water from the clouds as I flew through them. I could hear the air rushing past my ears and-

- - - - -

The alarm blared in my face with its annoying beeping and buzzing sound. I lazily swatted at it to silence it.

“Mmmmm, five more minutes please,” I begged with the inanimate object as I knocked over some of the stuff that populated my bedside table.

I found the alarm and began to search for the snooze button. Eventually I found it and slammed it down with my fist and the sweet sound of silence filled my ears once more.

“Jaaaaaccoooobbb!” cried my mother, “Breakfast is on the table!”

My eyes slowly began to open as the morning light shown through my curtains. The light hurted my eyes as they adjusted to the light.

Then I sluggishly rolled off the bed, and dragged myself over to my wardrobe to find my cloths. They were the same school cloths I had worn for the past two years at school; a light blue button up shirt and black dress pants.

It was the uniform I had to wear as a year ten student but next year was the year I qualifiy to senior year and can wear the white shirt. Then, no one would question me as I skip the queue for the tuck shop. That and the responsibilities I would probably have to do along with it, but the way the world was looking I would be lucky if I get to finish year twelve.

“Jacob,” said my mother as she poked her head through my door. She had long flowing locks of brown hair that matched her brown eyes. She was fair skinned like me but unlike me she didn’t have freckles like me.

“Jacob your breakfast is getting cold so please hurry up,” she said as I finished fashioning my belt.

“Yeah, I’ve got to get going soon or I’m going to be late for school,” I said as I quickly ran my hands through my semi long hair to get the knots out.

“Alrighty,” she said before she turned out to head back into the kitchen, “Oh and me and your father have to talk to you tonight, so no going out. Okay.”

“Okay,” I said while in the back of my mind I was swearing in dread and terror for whatever they wanted to talk to me about. It was always the same, she would tell me that we needed to ‘talk’ and they would sit me down at the table and ground me for a month. But the thing that scared me the most was what I was in trouble for. Had I done something wrong in the past that had cascaded and piled up into a massive screw up that would doom me for the test of my life?

“Don’t worry; you’re not in trouble,” she said in a recurring voice, “We just need to talk, okay.”

“Alright,” I sighed as I felt calm again.

She left the room as I found my tie. I could never get the hang of ties, as I’d always get them to long or far too short. This time however I had succeeded in tying it the first go.

“Yeah, today is going to be a good day,” I said under my breath as I walked out of my room.

= = = = =

I strode into the dining room where my father sat reading the paper. Even though he was a pony now he still loved reading the paper. I guess it’s easier to start with how my dad became a talking pegasus colored like a drawing I would've done as a kindergartener. He had that burnt yellow color to his coat and a light brownish color to his mane, which kind of matched his feathers.

But ever since Equestria had appeared and began offering conversion a lot of crazy stuff began happening. A bunch of terrorists killing Equestrians, the Australian government collapsing, and ponies ponifying anything that had figures; the first group was called the Human Liberation Front, or HLF for short and the last one was only know as the Ponification of Earth’s Rebirth or PER. But before the government collapsed my dad did a lot of work trying to take down members of the PER and the HLF as a Federal Police Agent.

But in his line of work it was common of injury to happen. And well one day when he was spying on a PER hideout he was caught and ponified on the spot, luckily they were kind enough to drag him to a Bureau.

“Mornin’ dad,” I said as I rubbed his head as I sat down.

“Hey son, did you sleep well last night?” he asked as I scoffed toast.

“Alright, cool dream though,” I said as some crumbs of toast flew out of my mouth.

“Oh? What was it about?” he asked as he put his newspaper down.

“Well it was a dream about me flying around in the clouds, and then the alarm woke me up,” I replied back as I began on the second piece of toast.

“Ahhh, sounds like my conversion dream. But it’s probably because you want to be a pilot and all that. Your brain’s just letting you know it really wants to be a pilot too,” he said as he looked at the clock behind me.

“Oh boy, I gotta get going,” he said as he sprung up in the air and glided over to my mother with his dark sun burnt yellow wings. He landed a kiss on my mother’s cheek as he packed away his newspaper into a briefcase he had.

“I’ll see you guys when I get back, but I got to get to the office otherwise I’m going to miss that Equestrian case with that boy getting ponified at South Brisbane,” he quickly said as he picked up his briefcase as he darted out to the door and flew away.

“Well I better follow him, because school and all,” I said as I finished my toast only to flush it down with a glass of orange juice.

“Alright, I might be able to walk you to the train station as I go to work,” she said as I quickly grabbed my bag for school.

“I’d love to but I promised I would meet Justin before school,” I said as I rushed out the door as I didn’t want to be seen walking to the train station with mum. Even though I could catch the train to school, I just found it easier to walk the entire way with Justin.

I quickly threw the straps of my bag around my arms and set out for school.

= = = = =

As I began the semi long walk to school I noticed the new neighbours beginning to move in. The people that had originally lived there had all got ponified and moved out to live in Equestria.

These new neighbors on the other hand looked… different. I couldn’t tell if the Earth pony moving boxes was a worker or my new neighbors. Then I saw the small off pink filly as she stood on a box barking orders to the moving men as the father rushed over to hush her.

‘Well this is going to be interesting,’ I thought to myself as I could already imagine the neighbourhood just leaving because of Eqeustrians moving in. I mean we got funny looks from time to time for dad being a pegasus, but we all got along… for the most part.

I never the less sighed and continued on my way to school.

= = = = =

Author’s notes: ARE THOU HAPPY WINDYECHO?! And yes I shall be slowly rewriting it, but it’s not on the priority list of crap to write, but I might dabble a bit into it here and again. So I'll write it when I damm well please unless lots of people yell at me to do so.

Comments

[Da Bunnana King]

1713346
Yes I know how that broken record goes. But I'm going to adress them in the rewrite I'm doing.

[Da Bunnana King]

1727417
1727475

Look can we please not resort to violence. Look I get it you don't like it but you don't need to go on about your murderous rampage in a fictual story.

[Demon Eyes Laharl]

1729087

I agree. I'd have shouted, broke off their friendship, call the police, and then the press.

Violence is the least resort... But I'm not going to let them off at all

[Da Bunnana King]

1729756
Yeah, its kind of the reason I'm rewriting it. The first time I wrote it I knew something was off but I couldn't see what I did wrong. Then when everyone told me of Jacob and his flat personality I decided to do an alt ending, but it didn't satisfy me so I'm re-writing it and also because some people seem to like it a lot that they just want more. I think they just like the slice of life part of it and some of the actual story. But I'm going to re-write it instead to see if I can fix up some of the major problems I have with it along with what some people don't like about it. Sadly its still going to follow the old original plot of it but I'm going to mix it up a bit more.

[Demon Eyes Laharl]

1729884

I don't mind if Jacob really wanted it deep down. My issues were from his so called friends.

Good luck with the rewrite

[Da Bunnana King]

1729908
Yeah, that was a major problems everyone has with the story and right now I'm trying to figure out a way to fix that up.

[faren455]

How did this get into the anti-conversion bureau? Last time I read this it was pro-bureau, unless the story was taken ironically? Was this meant ironically?

[Da Bunnana King]

1813468
Wait its in the Anti TCB group? When did this happen?

[faren455]

1813522 I know right? It's in the deconstruction folder. Which would be apt, if you intended to highlight all the worst parts of TCB stories. I think they believed you meant this to show how humans are victims by using a child who was forcibly changed. Ahahah I don't what's funnier, that they couldn't tell it was serious, or that your story is so appalling that they could only understand it sarcastically.

[Da Bunnana King]

1813562
It was actually a good story, if you get passed the original ending. As for why its in the Anti's folders, then fuck if I know.

[Redemption]

brooksbell.com/sites/default/files/thumbsdown.jpg

[Da Bunnana King]

1825203
Good for you, but care to share why its bad?

[Redemption]

1825343 1- I didn't like the original version.
2- the third version was nice but there still some missing stuff like: why is everyone getting ponified, why did the australian goverment collapsed, why are his friends (who are not original from equestria) are using books in equestrian and not english.
3- his reaction to being ponified against his will is.... getting better, but it's not enough, I would expect at least some screaming even if he secretly wanted to become a pony.
4- I disagree with what he says about humanity, in fact, in my opinion, that is the worst part, you could easily change the location to africa and the names human and pony to white and black and we would have a modern version of "The white man's burden".

[Da Bunnana King]

1825999
1- Good for you.
2- I'm sure I explained why the goverment collapsed but spoilers it involved Australia being invaded by North Korea (My [crappy] universe is modeled after the Tomorrow series of books) so they went full on paranoid and closed the boarders and made it martial laws. Then it collapses because no dosh was coming in and such. Not everyone is getting ponified I'm just saying that there are people that are ponified. Why Equestrian books... well it was Griffionic books because you know Razor being a griffin and such.
3- Well not everything has to be screaming, doesn't make for a good story when all the main characters dialog for a scene is "AHHHAAAHHHHHHH!!!" until he calms down.
4- Not really, I mean the ponies aren't enslaving the human race or beating us with sticks to make us mine for iron and other precious mineral or harvest their sugar cane crop. That and you know never in the Slave Trade of the Congo were the Dutch imperialists turning the native slaves into white people, I know they tried and educate the so called 'savages' to the white man's way because it was there burden. I fail to see how white man's burden can be applied to his outlook on humanity and the current events in his life because ponification is an option for everyone else but not for him... I don't like him, and he also drew the shortest stick out of the 'getting fucked over in a fanfic' game that I play with all my non-existent characters that I make at 3AM in the morning.

Remember when TCB was about people turning into ponies... I don't, now it all has to be link to some sort of historical event to show how humans are being oppressed when the story is really about people turning into ponies. I liked those days, I want to go back to them... but this is the internet after all so I guess we can't have nice things.

[Redemption]

1827257 2- I don't remenber reading this in the story, maybe you should give this a little more space on it.
4- I didn't mean that they were doing that, what I mean is that it sounded like "humans are better of as ponies" just like the "Africans are better of 'civilized'" idea. I mean, just look at this quotes from the alternate ending--> "I’m not sure why I would even want to be related to them" or "everything seemed so bland and depressing as a human, but now as a pony I’ve never felt so alive and everything seems to have color".

[Da Bunnana King]

1827649
2- Thats why I'm rewriting it.
4- White mans burden is white people taking on the burden to educated 'savages' (anyone who isn't anglo-saxton) and make them like superior white race, this is according to white mans burden. As for the quotes, well I regret nothing.

[Redemption]

1827718 2- good for you
4- that is what I was trying to say, it sounded like that but in a ponification idea.
"As for the quotes, well I regret nothing"
i231.photobucket.com/albums/ee108/stfu_gina_x3/Miscellaneous/watch-out-we-got-a-badass-over-here-meme.jpg

[Da Bunnana King]

1828113
4- If it were ponification idea I would very much have the humans are slaves and the potion is their salvation. Also your image dun broke.

[kyle131996]

1729087 Ya i see that now well i deleted it.

[Da Bunnana King]

1948740
Thank you.

[Da Bunnana King]

2120226
Fuck yo mangos, banana master race.

Also don't hold your breath for the re-write, I am quite lazy when it comes to doing stuff I really don't want to do.

[NorvyanishEagle]

I like the story very much. It is one of my favourite Conversion Bureau stories.

[ThatWeatherstormChap]

“I’ll have the hay burger with a lemon soda please,”

“lemon soda please,”

“lemon soda,”

“lemon,”

OH
MY
GOD