Prideful Creations

Scootaloo's masterpiece has been slandered. Just who is Granny Apple to doubt her magnificent creation?

Short bit of fluff written on an impulse.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 9 )

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Axis of Rotation

Axis of Rotation #1 · May 23rd, 2016 · · ·

How did I miss this in my feed?! Also, that was one short wait! You're gonna be waiting a loooooong time for my first one xD

Anyway, good to see you writing! This was a nice little piece. I liked Granny Smith, her dialogue felt spot on. And I can totally see this situation happening, where Scoots builds a ramp and Granny points out the impending disaster. I liked how her chair fell apart at the end. It was a nice way to diffuse the tension. And of course the irony was funny

A latticework of lumber I hand picked

Don'tcha hate it when you use hand instead of hoof? That one always gets me :P

Only barely proceeding when my head hit it.

Did you mean processing?

Please criticize at full capacity, leave no survivors

Criticism? Hmm... I think Scoots is a bit off here. I can't see her being that rude to Granny Smith, seeing how long she's known Apple Bloom.

Oh! Btw, I liked your prose. It also definitely felt like Scootaloo was writing it. I think this is my favorite line:

Her fake teeth shifted slightly in her wrinkled maw.

Ash Bark

Ash Bark #2 · May 23rd, 2016 · · ·

7239083 Thank you! I probably wouldn't have posted this without your encouragement. Originally the story wasn't even about ponies, but I thought it worked to well as scootaloo.

Axis of Rotation