Focus

by Twyla In Wonderland

Chapter Five: Unwanted Attention

The two injured girls were rushed to hospital as soon as the ambulance arrived. none of the doctors had ever seen an accident like this before. One of the doctors grabbed a clipboard as the nurses prepared them for examination,

“Hurry up!” He called, as the nurses picked up the pace. As one of the nurses walked by him, he caught her shoulder with his hand and asked her, “Nurse Cutiepie, who do we have here?”

“The one on the left is Pinkamena Pie, but I think she prefers to be called ‘Pinkie Pie’.” She said, as the doctor made notes,

“And what happened to her?” The doctor asked, as the nurse turned to face him fully.

“It appears that she was in a car crash due to the glass and the cuts on her arm, I’m not too sure though, as we did not have time to inspect the scene properly,” She said as he crossed under his notes.

“Okay, and the patient on the right?” He asked.

“On the right is Sunset Shimmer,” he made notes, “it looks to be a gash on her… left leg, pretty deep. Her shoulders and back is damaged as well. Broken bones, it looks like,” Cutie said as he clicked his pen, “is that everything you need, Dr Septic?”

“Yes, for now. We need to make a full assessment of the severity of their injuries, and fast. We can then take action accordingly. I may regret this, but if their cases are serious enough, I may operate by removing foreign objects from their bodies and then stitch them up without consent. If they remain unconscious long enough, that is. We can’t leave them as they are now if things are as bad as they seem, it is my duty to ensure the safety of my patients, even if that involves putting my career at risk.” He said, as Cutie nodded. Septic turned to one of the other nurses who was putting masks over the girls faces, “Nurse Snow.”

Her head spun around to face him,

“Can you go out of the room and ask the three girls out there about what happened to their friends?” He asked, as she nodded.

Snow grabbed some paper and a pen, she then walked past the patient's, Septic and then Cutie. She walked out of the room and silently closed the door behind her, only to see the three girls all stood up with worry written across their faces. To her, it looked as though the girls had a guilty conscience, until the middle one spoke up.

“Are our friends alright?” The purple haired one asked, Snow looked back to the closed door, and after staring at it for a second or two, she returned her gaze to the girls. She was about to speak, when the far left one leaned over.

“Are you serious, Rarity? Of course they won’t be, getting hurt that badly must have really hurt.” Snow, once again, was about to speak when the last girl stepped forward and confronted the other one.

“Zip it, Rainbow Dash, she’s just worried. The fact they were in pain earlier doesn’t mean they can’t be alright now, you bonehead!”

“Don’t start, Applejack!”

The two ended up in a loud argument, when Rarity looked over at the Nurse who had recently walked out. Snow rolled her eyes, “You can finish this little fight later, girls. Right now, we should focus on what happened to your friends in there. Can you three please sit down over here.” Snow’s voice was calm, as she signalled for them to be seated in a line of chairs to their right.

Rainbow Dash and Applejack both went quiet and turned to the nurse, before sitting down without question. Rarity did the same as Snow pulled another chair up and sat down in front of the girls, crossing her legs. The girls stared eagerly at her.

“Now, can you tell me your names, please.” She said, as they nodded, “Let’s start with you,” ,he pointed her pen at Rarity,

“I’m Rarity,” Snow wrote it down then pointed towards the other two.

“Applejack.”

“Rainbow Dash.”

Snow finished writing, before smiling warmly and looking up at them, “Now please, tell me what on earth happened to them?”

***

“A large wolf?” Snow asked, as she abruptly stopped writing.

“More of a werewolf type,” Rarity said. Snow snickered.

She began laughing, never in her life has she heard such an absurd suggestion. “I’m sorry, but werewolves are mythological creatures, your traumatic experience must have warped your memory into something more menacing and obscure than is the truth.”

“We’re being serious,” Applejack said, as Snow stood up.

“I’m sorry, girls, but it’s impossible to believe a story which is so farfetched.” She put the chair back and walked back into the surgery room.

“She’s right, you know.” Applejack said, as the other two looked at her incredulously.

“Don’t be stupid, Applejack, she doesn’t know what she’s saying.” Dash said, as Rarity placed her hand over her mouth.

“She is, though!” Applejack fired back, they began another argument.

“Shut up, shut up, shut up!” Rarity shouted, causing them to flinch. “You need to stop fighting like preschool children!”

“Yeah, Applejack.”

“She’s talking to both of us, Dash.”

Dash crossed her arms and pouted, as Rarity’s phone went off. “One second, girls,” she huffed.

***

Snow passed Septic the notes, and went into the back room. She stripped down into black shorts and a white crop top, she then tossed her work clothes to the side and replaced her work shoes with her pink converse shoes. Then, she pulled a bobble out of her hair, allowing the blonde locks cascade downwards like a waterfall, coming to a halt just below her shoulder blades. She ran her hands through her hair, giving it a little life.

Snow picked up her keys and phone from the desk. as she walked to the back and pulled a key out of a small box. She then unlocked the window before climbing out of it, trying to make as little noise as possible. Once outside, Snow pulled her phone up to check the time, 23:46 . She set off walking towards the car park and decided to make a phone call.

“Hiya, Tiger.” She smiled as arrived in the car park, “sorry did I disrupt something?” Snow grabbed her helmet and straddled her bike, “Yeah, everything you said about a large looking wolf was true,” Snow looked around, “I had two girls in today, one of which looked like she had been in a car crash, and the other had a large gash and dislodged bones.” She jammed her keys into the bike, “I’ll come over now, see you soon” Snow pulled her phone away from her ear, “Bye.” She hung up.

Snow put her phone back in her shorts, and put her helmet firmly upon her head, adjusting the strap around her chin until it felt comfortable and secure. She twisted her keys anti-clockwise, which in turn started the bike. Snow then set off towards her girlfriend’s house.

***

“Nurse Snow, I need you out here now!” Septic called as Cutie replaced Pinkie’s bandages around her arm; who had woken up just minutes earlier.

“Nurse Snow!” He repeated, but he received nothing in return once again.

Cutie walked away from Pinkie before proceeding swiftly into the back room. She knocked softly yet rapidly against the door and placed her hand on the handle.

“Twyla?” Upon opening the door, she noticed that Twyla’s clothes were scattered over the ground and the window was wide open, “Dr Septic? She’s gone.”

“What?!” He ran over and stood in the doorway for a few seconds, an expression of pure disbelief written across his face. “Really?!” He flung his pad down onto the ground and stamped on it repeatedly in a mildly amusing fit of anger. Panting heavily after his daily dose of exercise, he spat that which was searing through his outraged mind through gritted teeth, “Fucking bitch! She must have gone to Moonlight’s!”

“Septic, calm down, please.” Cutie said, covering her mouth and stifling a giggle as he whipped his head to his left and glared at her with wild eyes and a soon-to-be-ruined complexion.

“Why?! You know I have a thing for Moonlight! If Twyla goes over to hers, then Moon could like her over me!”

“Septic, there is no point in trying. Moonlight’s gay, you have literally a zero percent chance of getting with her.”

“I’m still gonna try!” He rocketed out of the room, almost tripping over an operating table before scrambling back into a stable sprint.

“For God’s sake!”

“Hey, Nurse. What’s up? Sounds like he’s having a rough day...” Pinkie asked as she walked over.

“Just the doctor trying to get a girl… Anyway, do you feel any better now?”

***
Her eyes shot open and her head convulsed with spasmodic bursts of excruciating pain. She raised herself off the ground and observed her surroundings. She was in her garden, naked. She obviously wasn’t a fan off public nudity, so she attempted to stretch her back, cringing as her head continued to pulsate. She dashed into the house in search of medication, as she feared she may be on the brink of passing out once again.

Her hair bounced with every step as she bounded through the doorway, not even having the ability to acknowledge her lack of a door. Reaching her bathroom, she opened up her mirror cupboard which she used for medication, and after having swallowed 3 ibuprofen tablets dry, Fluttershy collapsed onto her toilet seat, clutching her head in strained agony.

After about 20 minutes of prolonged torture, Fluttershy’s head cleared up enough for her to at least see and think relatively straight. Thus, she got up and longed for nothing but her bed for the rest of the day. However, upon leaving the bathroom, Fluttershy was met with the sight of her house, which looked as if it had been ransacked by a rampaging behemoth.

Looking around her house with her mouth hanging open, Fluttershy regretfully took in the extent to which damage had been dealt. Everything was broken, almost without exception. Fluttershy slowly marched around her home, a zombified expression settling upon her face as she blocked as many emotions as she could.

She thickly swallowed her despair and walked off upstairs, her head hanging down as she cast the sickening feeling that comes from severe loss to the back of her mind, at least for a few minutes. The stairs were creaking with her every step, threatening to collapse any second. The noise brought her nothing but pain, as her head begged for mercy.

Finally making it to the top, she looked down the corridor to see her bedroom door collapsed on the ground. She chose to ignore the scratches on the door, coupled with the fact that her nails were severely mangled. Everything Fluttershy was taking in was only making things worse, and she simply could not deal with it all at once.

Fluttershy collapsed onto her bed and stared up at her roof without making a sound. Deathly silence set across the room as Fluttershy began to lose her composure, sitting in silence allowed all of what she had just witnessed slam into her like a tonne of bricks.

Fluttershy broke, as tears began to pour down the sides of her cheeks, dampening the torn bedsheets. Bringing her arms up to shield her ears, Fluttershy began to curl up into a ball, as a torrent of emotions raged within her, ravaging the remains of her sanity and bringing her migraine back with full force.

Fluttershy then let loose a wail of despair so sickening, that would make even the most hardened of men cringe in unadulterated pity. This wail was followed by a series of gut-wrenching sobs, as Fluttershy felt her entire world fall apart around her. Her home, everything she had spent her life building up, it was all gone. There were so many things she would be unable to replace.

After an hour of crying and regaining her composure, Fluttershy squirmed off of her bed and back to her doorway. Fluttershy stood up and wondered why she had not just stayed in bed, as her migraine had faded and she was exhausted.

Fluttershy slowly got changed, feeling as though she was forgetting something. In sombre spirits, she checked her phone, 9:55, Wednesday.

“Shit!” She sprinted out of her room and down stairs, having suddenly regained some reserves of energy upon her realisation. Fluttershy had hardly noticed that she was moving unnaturally quickly, as she was already at her door, “I’m late!”

***

“Is Miss Shimmer still in hospital?” Rich asked, as Rarity nodded, “What about Miss Shy…?” As if on cue, Fluttershy herself ran into the room.

With her hair put up out of the way, along with skinny jeans and a plain shirt, Fluttershy rushed across the room in attempted preparation for the lesson. Mr Rich crossed his arms,

“A little late dontcha think?”

“I’m…” She coughed as her voice was rough, “I’m sorry. I had a terrible night.”

“Detention.” He said flatly, as Shy huffed and sat in her seat, next to Hoops. “Alright, class, today you are continuing on your project. Get into your groups that you were in last lesson and continue where you left off.”

Rarity got up and walked over to Fluttershy, kneeling beside her,

“Hey, Fluttershy. Feeling any better?”

“A little Better then I was the other day, but today I woke up in my garden,” Rarity tilted her head, urging her to continue, “and my house… My house was completely destroyed. I’m scared, Rarity, I don’t know what to do...”

“I-I’m so sorry to hear that, darling. I had no idea… Don’t worry. Just talk to any one of us if you need to, you’re in my group anyways.” Rarity stood up as Shy remained in place, when Hoops leaned over and attempted to whisper into her ear.

“He-” Thud! Hoops was now on the ground, holding his cheek which was now bright red and sore. Shy’s fist had collided with his face.

“Don’t speak to me!” She shouted, as everyone gathered around and the teacher pushed past them.

“What’s going on here?!”

“Mr Rich, Fluttershy punched Hoops.” One of them said, as Shy got to her feet.

She seemed taller than the teacher, and it was only last week when she had been shorter than him,

“Did you punch him, Fluttershy?”

“Yeah, I nee-” As she attempted to walk past him, Rich grabbed her arm.

“Double detention!”

“Let go of me.” She said, trying to break his grasp.

“I’m not letting go until you say you’re sorry!”

Fluttershy smiled grimly at him, twisting her arm around his in order to grab a hold of his upper arm in a vice-like grip. She then began to crank her vice, crushing his confidence, power and authority as a teacher before his very eyes. Rich could feel every pop, crack and slice as Fluttershy was digging her nails into his soft flesh, her crushing force reducing his bones to dust. Streams of fresh blood began to gush forth, as Rich fell to his knees in agony, shaking as he whimpered in horror.

Her gaze was locked firmly on his, clearly enjoying the sight of his terror-struck expression. Fluttershy saw Rich as nothing more than a pellucid sugar-glass ornament that would shatter with the slightest touch. This thought alone caused the corners of her mouth to twinge with anticipation, as mania began to consume her being once again. Her rampant Id was leading her descent into utter madness, as her superego grasped desperately at her outstretched arms in an attempt to lift her back to the realm of reason and sanity.

Rich stared back at the monster of a girl before him, tears rolling down his cheeks as he shamefully resisted the urge to beg for mercy and scream for aid. Fluttershy then grabbed his torso with her free arm, and after making sure her grip on his arm was secure, she flung him backwards, sending him soaring up through the air over her head, as he let out a screech of fear. Fluttershy laughed maniacally as she heard him crunch onto the ground behind her.

The rest of the class had only been watching in morbid curiosity, after having backed into the corners of the room. Many of the girls were crying and bundling up in fear of what they were witnessing.

The room went deathly silent for a few seconds, as Fluttershy stopped laughing just as unexpectedly as she had started. She then walked calmly over to a groaning Mr. Rich, who was attempting to climb to his feet, looking equally as feeble as a man in his 90’s. Fluttershy then stood on his stomach and pressed down with all of her weight and strength, causing Rich to cough and spit thickened blood from his mouth as she snickered in mockery,

“When I say let go…” Her voice gradually deepened in pitch as she spoke, “I mean, Let go!” She then retracted her foot and seemed to come to her senses, drifting her levelled vision across the room, observing the scene she had just caused with an awful, sickening feeling of grim anticipation. Fluttershy was filled to the brim with those same feelings she had felt upon realisation of the state of her home, she felt like a failure as a human being.

“Mr. Rich! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! I don’t know what happened, I… Oh no, what am I going to do?! Someone call an ambulance!” The rest of the room was still in a state of shock, watching her carefully as she approached them with pleading eyes and jumping out of the way as she attempted contact. Fluttershy looked hurt by this, and began to sob into her hands pitifully. A girl ran over to Rich and began to check his wounds, as another girl from the opposite side of the room drew her phone, dialling for an ambulance.

Rarity bravely walked over and placed her hand on Fluttershy’s shoulder. Shy flinched at the unexpected touch. Looking at Rarity’s face, Fluttershy saw that rather than fear, Rarity clearly had suspicion written across her face, yet she did not feel accused in any way.

“I-uh… It’s okay, Fluttershy... Do you wanna stand outside? Go into the practice room? Would you tell me what the hell that was just now?” Shy nodded and walked out with Rarity, leaving the other students to deal with the now passed out Mr. Rich.

“What am I going to do, Rarity?! I just assaulted him, massively! Not to mention poor Hoops… I’m going to be locked up, I feel so awful…”

“Calm down, Fluttershy. You were clearly not in a right state of mind, hopefully Mr. Rich will see that once he… Heals up… A-Anyway, what I’m trying to say is, either he won’t press any charges when he realises something is terribly wrong with you, or, if it comes to it, the Law Court should see reason when presented with the specifics of your situation at the case hearing.” Rarity attempted to pacify her.

Sniffling, Fluttershy replied meekly, “I, I hope so, Rarity…”

Reaching the end of the hallway they were walking down, Rarity took a set of keys out of her back pocket and reached for the door to her immediate right. After she had unlocked it, they wandered inside. Fluttershy pulled a chair from the side of the room and sat down, as Rarity closed the door behind them. Rarity too pulled up a chair, sitting across from Fluttershy with a serious expression on her face,

“Now, do you wanna tell me what’s gotten into you lately? I want to know the whole truth, if you are able to give it to me.”

“To be honest, I have no idea. Something has changed inside of me, I’m taller, faster, stronger... It’s scaring me...” She snapped her eyes shut, “Not to mention my voice deepening every now and again.” She reopened them, “I also woke up naked in my garden.” Rarity blushed suddenly, and this didn’t go unnoticed by Fluttershy. She looked down in embarrassment.

“There is something that I want you to know.” Rarity said as Shy looked back up at her, eyes wide open.

“What is it?”

“There was a giant wolf in your cottage and looked to be wearing your clothing.”

Shy gasped, ”I had a dream like that. I saw Rarity, Sunset and Applejack.” She thought, as Rarity snapped her out of her train of thought. ”The many things I want to do to her...” The thought of Rarity made Shy bite her lip.

“Rarity?”

“Yes, darling?” Shy got up as Rarity watched her put the chair away, she joined in on her idea.

While standing up, Shy took her chance and grabbed Rarity’s arm, pulling her close to her chest, thus making Rarity place her hands upon her own,

“Oh my….” Shy whispered something in her ear making her blush, “W-What?”

“I want you, need you. I love you,” Her voice was husky. “There are so many things I want to do to you.”

“Fluttershy, darling... Y-You sound sick, are you okay? This all seems a little sudden and unexpected...” Rarity said, looking up at the tall girl.

“I’m fine, Rarity.” She smiled, displaying sharp fangs.

Rarity felt uneasy due to their close proximity, however it was not like Rarity didn’t like it. If she were being completely honest with herself, she had always liked Fluttershy that way too. Finding out that she’s a fucking wolf makes this opportunity even better and not to mention hotter, thus appealing to her more personal perversions.

As Rarity blushed out of shame due to her current perverted thought process, Fluttershy leaned down and pressed her lips hard against Rarity’s. Rarity took a sharp, surprised breath through her nose, her eyes widening. Fluttershy’s lips were surprisingly soft. Rarity suddenly felt something glaze her bottom lip, she realised it was Shy’s teeth running across her lip. This made her moan into Fluttershy’s mouth, however she was cut short as Fluttershy slipped her tongue into her mouth. The ring of the bell went unnoticed by the two.

The door swung open, as three girls walked into the room. They came to a sudden halt as they observed the scene in front of them.

“Um…” Applejack started, causing Shy to open her eyes and pull away lifting her head up away from Rarity, cringing in shame. She let go of Rarity, feeling those two same overpowering emotions simultaneously. Anger, and fear. Rarity on the other hand was left speechless and her cheeks were flared up.

“What the?”

“Were you two,” Dash coughed, “making out?”

Fluttershy whimpered as she turned her body away from the girls. A sudden burning sensation shot through her arm,

“Fluttershy? Are you okay?” Pinkie asked.

“I’m f-fine.” She said, holding back the reflexive response to pain with a strained wince.

“You sure?”

“Y-Yeah.” Her arm began to shake violently.

“You seem taller, and you’re acting funny. Are you sure you’re okay, sugar?” Applejack asked, concerned for her friend.

“P-Please stop asking q-questions...”

Rarity snapped out of her silence then shook her head,

“Hi, guys.”

“A little late, Rarity.” Dash said, as Fluttershy spun around to face them.

“Woah, what happened to your eyes?” Dash asked, as she walked closer to her. Someone knocked hard against the door, making her flinch and hide behind Pinkie’s drums.

“Come in,” said Applejack.

Celestia walked in and began to talk to the four girls as Shy remained behind the drums, her heart beating as so in an unwanted solo. Her breath was shortened and she couldn’t scream. She found that she could merely open her mouth, only to find that the words were taken away.

Increasingly, her breathing began to sting at the back of her throat, her eyes narrowing as the stinging became worse, until she heard the door close and a call for her name. Ignoring the call, Shy groaned as her skin began to tear. She looked down and panicked, moving backwards suddenly and thus knocking the bass drum over. Along with this, all the other parts fell to the ground. She rolled down onto her knees, looking upwards with big eyes to see Celestia looking down at her, concern written across her principal’s face. Rarity and Applejack helped her up to her feet.

“Fluttershy?” Celestia started, as she spotted an officer behind her.

“I’ll take it, Celestia. I’m Officer Neon, and I would just like to ask you a quick question, Fluttershy. Are you responsible for the attack against Mr Rich?” Fluttershy began shaking, then nodded slowly.

Neon sighed and pulled something off his belt, Fluttershy turned to look at Rarity as she felt something cold touch her wrists. Looking back at Neon, Fluttershy watched as he placed handcuffs on her from the front. She reacted impulsively out of fear due to the unwanted contact, thus grabbing him by his neck and lifting him into the air with one arm. The others backed up quickly.

“P-Put me down,” Neon tried to say to the clearly frightened girl.

“I can’t!” Shy tried to pull her arm away, but it wouldn’t move. Celestia rushed in from the side and tried to help him by grabbing Fluttershy’s arm.

Fluttershy didn’t like anyone touching her, especially her principle. So, she tried to get Celestia off of her, but it was no use due to the cuffs. Fluttershy eventually broke them and whacked Celestia across the room, she hit the wall and landed in a heap. Applejack ran over to aid her principle, whilst Rarity, Pinkie and Rainbow looked over at Celestia. As they turned around they saw something large shift.

Just behind Fluttershy was a large, bushy tail. Rarity stared, as her friend grew massively in height whilst Neon struggled even more as her arms began to tear, revealing blood coated jet black fur. The blood was splattered onto the officer's face, as Fluttershy let out a low growl and her cheeks split, showing Neon that clearly an animal was trying to escape from its confines. She snarled at the officer, her eyes narrowing at him as Neon saw the change in her eye color. Her naturally calm, emerald blue irises slowly shifted into a deep crimson, they pierced through his own.

Neon felt something wet upon his neck, he looked to see Fluttershy’s hand split open, and slowly Neon started to feel something sharp prick his skin. He screamed, as Shy felt his vital veins pop in his neck. She continued to dig her claws deeper into his flesh, as her legs opened up. Rarity stared in utter horror, as Rainbow and Pinkie backed up. Applejack helped Celestia to her feet and left the room in a hurry.

Fluttershy felt Neon go limp in her hands, she opened her mouth and prepared to devour Neon’s corpse. She dropped onto all fours and turned to see the remaining three left in the room. Never breaking her gaze away from the trio, she sunk her teeth into his soft flesh. Blood slowly dripped onto the ground as Rarity continued to back up whilst the other two ran out in terror.

“Pussies!” Rarity shouted in a very unladylike way as Shy crawled slowly towards the helpless girl.

Rarity hit the back wall as Fluttershy still stalked towards her, her new chew toy that was now slowly being drained of it’s insides twitched every now and again. Fluttershy got close enough to Rarity’s face in order for her to smell the blood. Rarity began to breath heavily and Shy dropped the body in front of her, like a dog fetching a stick and bringing it back to it’s owner. Fluttershy sat down and stared straight into Rarity’s eyes. She lowered her head and used her muzzle to move the body closer to the freshly traumatized girl. Two paramedics ran into the practice room to see the blood on the ground, the large wolf and Rarity.

“Ma’am, please stay calm,” One of them said, as the other one slowly walked towards the animal.

Turning around, Fluttershy saw the paramedic moving close to her, and so she snarled at him.

“Needle! Careful!” His partner shouted as he turned around.

“No shit!” He turned back to her and shimmied over to Rarity,

“Come on, let’s get you out of here,” Rarity shook her head.

“No, she’s gonna get mad,” Rarity replied, as Needle grabbed Rarity’s arm a little too hard, making her gasp, “Ow!”

Fluttershy turned around and growled as she stood up. Fluttershy was towering over the paramedic, as he let out an audible gulp. She swiped savagely at him, cutting his stomach open as his internal organs dropped out splashing into a thick crimson pool on the ground. He let out a low, gurgling groan and fell to the floor onto his knees, his throat filling with sticky fluid which caused him to hack and cough hoarsely. Shy picked him up by the head and squeezed as hard as she could, causing his head to explode. a loud, sickening squelching noise followed it, as Rarity covered her eyes when blood began to splatter across her dress and skin. The first paramedic gagged and ran out of the room screaming.

Fluttershy held the body of someone who wanted to help, but he had hurt Rarity, he had to pay1 . She threw him into the air and let his lifeless body hit the ground. She ran out of the room and dashed down the corridor, Rarity followed with haste. The window at the end of the corridor was broken and shards of glass covered the ground. Luckily, no one had seen Fluttershy, except Principal Celestia, Applejack, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash.

Shit. What is she going to do now?

Author's Note:

Both written this one

Comments

[Draco Loco]

Well... that happened.
A few grammatical errors in the narrative every couple of chapters.
I continue to want to know what happens next.

[GravelordNito]

6733752 I don't even know what's going on any more. I just sort of let her take the reins, and I'm just adding dark twists here and there, but hey, it's a thing.

[Draco Loco]

6736449
May want to add a gore tag for that last chapter though.

[GravelordNito]

6736488 The murder was her attempt at a section. It shouldn't be too hard for you to recognise the difference between her parts and the parts I completely re-wrote (hint, I used words such as pellucid).

[Draco Loco]

6739137
There are many things I am not good at. Discerning between two or more people's writing styles when they're co-writing a story is one of them. I may be able to notice subtle changes here and there, but oftentimes it goes unnoticed until I look back on it.

Sorry, the face made me nervous. Hey! This is my first nervously written comment. !

[GravelordNito]

6739205 Applejack's pretty unnerving, right?

If you don't notice, I suppose that means my editing is pretty good, so it's actually a good thing that you can't tell. It also means that our story blends together better as a whole, I guess.

[Draco Loco]

6739428
Correct on all accounts!