Status: tired, unmotivated, and probably inactive
In Ponyville, very few citizens ever find themselves in need of the police. Nevertheless, they have as motley crew of investigators. Counted among those ranks is Cold Scent, director of cold cases and official archiver. Life has been dull for Cold Scent, but he likes his job. Then he gets a visit from someone he never expected.
The caseless detective finally has a case.
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I'll admit, I only looked at this because of the votes. The short description doesn't exactly sound like the sort of badfic that would generally rack up a 0-3 ratio in such short order, so I just had to see what people found so bothersome about it. And honestly, I just don't see it. There's not really enough material for anyone to make an informed decision, and your writing is well above average for a first-timer, albeit a bit heavy on exposition.
I practically never vote on a fic I haven't made my mind up about, but I'll make an exception in this case and upvote it, simply to help balance the scales to something that seems a bit more reasonable.
I have upvoted this because it is a good start to what seems like a promising story.
That said, it would be a painful tease to leave this as it is. The stage has been set, but for what show?
The formatting in the top paragraphs needs to be looked at, there are some issues there with spacing and comma placement. The rest honestly looks pretty good.
Come on, write more! This will be great!
5892578
I am a sucker for a well-worded request. It just so happens that I recently got inspired by, of all things, Furious Seven. Not to say that movie is at all inspiring, but its endless action sequences do give you time to think without really ruining your experience of the movie. Expect a new chapter soon.
5901075 I'm glad to hear it!
Coincidentally, I've heard good things about that movie. (Or maybe not so much "good" as "surprisingly not horrible".)
I don't care!
Your prose is engaging, and I love the fish-out-of-water situation that's emerging.
Finally got around to reading this chapter. I like the balance of Cold Scent's seriousness with the absurdity of the situation he finds himself in. As a Robert Jordan/Brandon Sanderson fan, I appreciate your delving a bit into the world's magic system. The chapter length isn't a problem; if anything, short chapters keep it pretty consumable. And the hook at the end of this chapter was pretty... well, hook-y.