• Published 13th Aug 2014
  • 917 Views, 48 Comments

The Cloudsdale High Prom - Lightning Choke



What happens when Rainbow Dash and Thunder Stride decide to go to the prom together?

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Da epic remix o' my rap by DE_K. You know that shit!

Rainbow Dash looked round tha hall fo' her dopest playaz - it seemed they was nowhere ta be found. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! But, over tha mass of ponies tryin ta git outta there class rooms n' back home, Rainbow could hear a mare mutterin apologies ta tha playas da hoe bumped, which was impossible not ta do, so Rainbow had some time ta find where Fluttershy was. Funnily, once tha halls had pretty. Much cleared, her big-ass booty saw tha pink-maned Pegasus by her locker, tryin ta open dat shit. "Yo Fluttershy!" her big-ass booty shouted, gettin a squeal from Fluttershy as dat dunkadelic hoe turned n' saw Rainbow barrelin down tha hall towardz her n' shit. Right before they was bout ta crash together, her big-ass booty stopped on a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dime. "Whatsup?" Rainbow holla'd, ta lazy ta put space bars up in tha sentence yo, but we will just say she's outta breath. Fluttershy looked at her playa, dat biiiiatch was a funky-ass dope mare, n' Fluttershy wondered how tha fuck no muthafucka had axed her ta tha prom yet. Even dat freaky freaky biatch had been asked, ad cuz of her shynizz denied tha offer yo, but a offer is still a offer, right, biatch?

"Oh, nothing, just gettin locked n loaded ta bounce back ta tha doggy den. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Ive gots homework ta do." Rainbow Dash shook her head at what tha fuck Fluttershy had holla'd; dat shiznit was easy as fuck ta git a stallion ta do it fo' yo thugged-out ass.

"Pffff. I just git Streak Shot ta do it fo' mah dirty ass fo' realz. A's fo' game!" Fluttershy just nodded her head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch knew dat jumpin off bout some shiznit wit Dash wasn't eva a phat idea, n' besides, Streak didn't even remember when it mattered. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! With his crazy-ass multiple personalitizzle disorder, da thug was Streak Shot at school, a nerd, a funky-ass bookworm, a "egghead" as Rainbow calls him, n' he's fine wit dat shit. In game he's Lightnin Choke, top jock of tha school, n' definitely tha dopest fo' partyin fo' realz. At any other time, he's Thunder Stride, a stallion wit a phat sense of humor, n' has a personalitizzle dat make mah playas like his muthafuckin ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch n' "Skittles" as Thunder calls her had been playaz since dat biiiiatch was just a lil filly, n' pimped MPT durin his wild lil' freshpony year, which meant dat he knew Dash up in all of his cold-ass three personalities. "I'm goin back ta Thunder's place, wanna come?" Fluttershy nodded her head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Even though she n' Thunder was phat playas, da perved-out muthafucka still needed ta be reminded of whoz ass dat biiiiatch was cuz they kicked it wit up in his sophomore year. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "Okay, I'll peep you round then!" Fluttas smiled n' waved as she peeped Rainbow leave, she knew Streak would be round tha corner yo, but would become Thunder afta exitin tha school.

Rainbow rounded tha corner of tha hall ta peep Streak Shot, buried up in one of his thugged-out advanced college-level textbooks, tryin ta "study" bleh. Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck needz studying, biatch? What did dat eva do ta help anypony, biatch? "Yo egghead hommie! Git outta yo' books, was goin back ta yo' place!"

Streak turned his head ta peep "Skittles" ugh yo. How tha fuck could he just call her that, biatch? Dude would gotta rap ta thunder bout it when they talked next. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. See, ghettofab ta tha belief, he knew dat schmoooove muthafucka had MPD, n' was perfectly fine wit it yo. Dude didn't gotz a evil personalitizzle like most ponies do, n' he found havin rap battlez wit his other personalitizzles could be fun. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. They was also aiiight they didn't gotta study. "Yo, um, Dash" Dash smiled yo, but was secretly hopin dat da thug wood call her skittles. Even though Thunder only called her dat ta annoy her, her big-ass booty secretly was horny bout tha nickname, n' found it like funky, fittin none tha least. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Streak gots up, n' went over ta his fuckin locker, n' Dash only waited all dem secondz before Streak put away his books n' gots a gangbangin' folda n' shit. "Yo Dash, here's tha last of dis muthafuckin years homework." Dash took tha papers n' put dem up in her bag. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch didn't KNOW why dat schmoooove muthafucka had done it, dat biiiiatch wouldn't be needin it, anyways.

Bitch looked at Streak n' axed his ass a question they went over n' debated all dem times. "So, Streak, is dis tha last time I peep yo slick ass?" even though there was still school afta todizzle, dat biiiiatch would not be attending.

"Yo ass could always just skip tha camp, ya' know." Dash had debated dis up in her head yo, but her trips always came up on top.

" I was invited ta a Wonderbolts academy session. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. If you know me, I'm not missin dis shit." Streak nodded his head, knowin dat there was no way dat biiiiatch would miss dis shit. "Anyways. That's not what tha fuck I meant. What if we never peep each other again, biatch? Like, ever?"

Streak n' Dash started ta strutt toward tha doors, n' before tha pimpin' muthafucka turned tha fuck into Thunder Stride, da perved-out muthafucka holla'd ta her "I promise you, I'll be back"

Rainbow dash laughed uncontrollably at what tha fuck Streak had just holla'd. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "What, what's so funky?" Biatch could tell da thug was Thunder now cuz of tha chizzle up in his voice, like dat freaky freaky biatch had hustled ta do.

"Yo ass made yo' first joke, n' dat shiznit was tha dopest one ever, that's what's funky!" Thunder started ta git his composure fo' realz. A few secondz afta a freshly smoked up personalitizzle took over, da thug was always weird. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

Dude straightened up, puffin up his chest. "Well phat fo' me, give mah dirty ass a lama!" Dude gave rainbow time ta recover from what tha fuck seemed ta be tha funniest joke up in all of Equestria. Dash n' Thunder stood there, starin at each other fo' a while before they both broke up tha fuck into laughter n' shiznit fo' realz. After THAT episode was over, they went back ta Thunder's, like they always done did.

Da reason they always went back ta Thunder's [lace was cuz tha Equestrian posse had given his ass a doggy den up in Cloudsdale, rent-free yo. Dude had tried ta join tha workhorse before yo, but his schmoooove ass chizzled personalitizzles all kindsa muthafuckin times on-the-job dat hustlin wasn't a option. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Once they gots tha fuck into tha doggy den they both flopped onto tha couch. Both of dem had similar personalitizzles hoodly, n' although Thunder could tolerate mo' than dat thugged-out biiiatch could, they was dopest playas, n' dat was all dat mattered. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "hey Skittles, aiiight graduation, if you even passed!" Thunder n' Lightnin didn't know bout Streak bustin her homework fo' her - dat freaky freaky biatch had made shizzle of dis shit.

"Actually, I did pass, so go shiznit dat shiznit son!" Thunder laughed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Dude seemed ta ludd it when she gots aggravated. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time.

"So, what's up wit tha camp, biatch? Still gonna be there, i'm guessing."

"Yeah, there's not much else goin on, other than prom."

"Prom, biatch? so, who's tha dirty stallion, biatch? Huh, biatch? Huh, biatch? Please tell me its not streak, Ill never hear tha end of dat shiznit son!" Dash frowned. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch wasn't one fo' dances yo, but no muthafucka had even axed her ta go wit em. Thunder had peeped tha look of disappointment on Skittlez face; it wasn't a cold-ass lil common sight yo, but he knew dat shit. "No Muthafucka axed you, huh, biatch? bummer."

"Yeah. Its not all bad, I would rather ride wit you fo' tha last time instead of goin ta some wack prom."

"While I would normally be delighted ta hear dat I take prioritizzle over a school dance" Dat shiznit was now at which Skittlez chuckled all up in tha joke, "I be wonderin why you holla'd last." Dash looked at Thunder n' shit. They had been playaz since they pimped a cold-ass lil conscience, of course they would peep each other again, right, biatch?

"I don't now, nahmeean, biatch? I just hope dat dis isn't tha last dizzle our crazy asses have wit each other."

"Well, lets make it a trippy night, right Skittles?" Dash raised a eyebrow at Thunder n' shit. Thunder caught tha look n' done cooked up a gangbangin' grill like da thug was taken aback, n' Dash laughed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "Skittles, how tha fuck could you, nahmean biiiatch, biatch? Why would a respectful stallion like mah dirty ass eva be thinkin dat way?"

"I have no clue why, Thunder."

"Dash." Dash looked back at Thunder, mo' seriously dis time. Thunder only calls her dat went he's gots a plan or a purpose. "Go ta prom wit me, Skittles."

Dash was taken aback. Never had Thunder been so phat on a matter like all dis bullshit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sure, they had gone on dates before yo, but they was casual, n' "just playa" deals. "Ummmmmm.." Thunder rolled his wild lil' fuckin eyes.

"C'mon, we gots two hours, just wear one of dem dresses dat I looted you wit hard gots posse taxpayer scrilla n' ill just one of mah tuxes paid fo' tha same way, n' well gotz a funky-ass blast!" Noticin dat Dash still looked unsure, Thunder replied ta his own comment. "Skittles, be thinkin bout dat shit. Like you holla'd, dis could be our last night together up in a while, possibly forever n' shit. Were both not up in relationshizzles, we've gots pimped out connections together, its bout time our crazy asses had a actual date together." Dash looked at Thunder, n' thought fo' a second, just a second. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!

"Fine. Ill gots ta prom wit you, on one condition."

"What tha fuck iz yo' condition?" Dash smiled deviously at Thunder n' shit.

"I git ta booty-call you Thundy fo' tha entire night, n' tha lyricist of dis fanfic must also call you Thundy fo' tha rest of tha story." Thundy stared at Dash fo' a second, cringed all up in tha name, n' then turned ta tha lyricist.

"Why do you gotta write these thangs?"

"Im locked n loaded Thundy!" Thundy looked all up in tha stairs yo. Dude gasped at what tha fuck da perved-out muthafucka saw.

"What, biatch? Did I not wear tha right one?" Dash looked at Thundy wit a mean look. Thundy caught tha stare n' shook his head, n' Dash became aiiight again, n' did a gangbangin' fly-around fo' his muthafuckin ass.

"Skittles, you - you look dope." Dash blushed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Biatch had never been called dope by mah playas other than her muthafathas before, n' it felt good. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Dash flew up ta Thundy n' hugged his muthafuckin ass. Now - dis wasn't a regular hug. Thundy had hugged Dash before, n' dis was definitely different.

"Yo, before I open tha door, sorry fo' tha wack vehicle. Its all I could git on short notice." Dash frowned n' pushed past Thundy n' opened tha door. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Before her was suttin' dat freaky freaky biatch had never peeped before. Dash turned around, n' before dat thugged-out biiiatch could say anything, tha pimpin' muthafucka holla'd at her what tha fuck it was. "Its a Ferrari California. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Since dis be a gangbangin' fanfic, I gots tha lyricist ta add one in. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Its modified fo' ponies, n' straight-up ruins any immersion a reader somehow gots from tha story.

"Cool! But, how tha fuck do we make it move?"

Once Dash n' Thundy arrived all up in tha school, hey both gots outta tha car, n' laughed they way up ta tha main entrance. Dash stopped abruptly, n' so did Thundy. "Whats wack skittles?"

Dash looked at Thundy. "Wont you turn back tha fuck into Streak?"

Thundy looked all up in tha entrance. "Only one way ta smoke up!" And Thundy dove tha fuck into tha school, without transforming. "Yo dawwwwg! peep that!" Dash laughed n' ran tha fuck into tha school, n' they both ran ta tha dizzle floor. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuRespin - rainboom connection ckin ass. Some pretty phat noize was playing, n' Thundy turned ta Dash.

"May I have dis dance?" Thundy looked at Dash, hesitantly waitin fo' his ass ta gotta drag her onto tha dizzle floor. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. But instead Dash looked at Thunder n' holla'd "Yo ass may."

Author's Note:

Once again, big thanks to DE_K
He put my story through a generator, and got this.
Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!
Sorry for no links, my computer is lagging like a biatch, I'm getting a new one in a few days doe.

Comments ( 12 )

4846348 It's a snowball effect. Once something has more dislikes than likes, people come to it just so they can hate on it and dislike it. And the more people dislike something, the more people that come to dislike it. Kind of sad but we're more evil than one might think.

This is horrendous.

You have a perfect OC with not one, not two, but THREE NAMES!:flutterrage:

Then you have his girlfriend be rainbow dash, because when in FIMfiction has a Self Insert Gary Stu OC and RD ever gone wrong? :rainbowhuh: :facehoof:

-9001/10

4844164

So how'd you get roped in for chapter two?

4843031

In 1923, he attempted a coup up in Munich ta seize juice n' shit. Da failed coup resulted up in Hitlerz imprisonment, durin which time da thug freestyled his crazy-ass memoir, Mein Kampf (I be a gangsta yo, but y'all knew dat n' mah Struggle)

His aggressive foreign policy is considered ta be tha primary cause of tha outbreak of Ghetto Battle Pt II up in Europe yo.

On 30 April 1945, less than two minutes later, tha two committed suicide ta avoid capture by tha Red Army, n' they corpses was burned. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Under Hitlerz leadershizzle n' racially motivated ideology, tha regime was responsible fo' tha genocide of at least 5.5 mazillion Jews, n' millionz of other suckas whom he n' his wild lil' followers deemed racially inferior.

4855999
At least you love my fanfic.
I wrote this because I wanted it out of my head, and that worked.

4859931

:ajbemused: who the fuck told you I loved this?

If anything, I ducking despise it

4859939

I mean Fanfics that are so bad it's good.

This fanfic is so bad, I want to be blind and forget this fanfic.

4859945
Ah.
I regret to inform you that your username is misleading.

If you really do hate it, why do you keep coming back?
:facehoof:

4857521
He put it through a word generator.

4859953
That makes sense.
Okay, ill stop...
NOW!
:heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::scootangel:

This chapter hurted me brain

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