The citizens of Equestria once fought for their prosperity. Scarcely anything remains of that history. Over ten years ago Stratos Lucid began to unravel one aspect of that past. Through his battles against an ancient entity, he gained incredible friends and allies. Yet Stratos was merely a human, not a savior. They knew Krastos would kill him, as it had many before. Magic and technology can only do so much.
But it was not for nothing: Stratos kept his promise.
(Special thanks to JessyRuiz (http://jessyruiz.deviantart.com/) for the cover image)
Chapters (34)
Unknown 11: You know him best. Can we trust him and his word?
*PASUE*
That should be pause
Okay, so my initial thoughts are as follows
1. You have earned a track and a thumb
2. The story tends to jump around a bit, seems like humans know about Equestria, then they don't, then they do again and I personally got a little lost
3. This random villain, Krastos or something he needs to be fleshed out more in coming chapters, you cannot have "There is a villain, He is bad" without it sounding very childish, we need to see WHY he is bad, have him perform some dastardly deeds, link him to these attacking creatures in some concrete way.
4. Your timeline is going to look like Homestuck if you are not careful.
439592 First of all, thank you very much for reading this, catching that mistake, tracking and commenting.
Now that you mention it, yeah I should have seen that problem. It does seem to jump around a bit. I've read this story so many times that I forgot what it would look like with a fresh view. I'll try and think of something. (Any suggestions are appreciated.)
Not that this excuses anything, but the idea is that the reader is getting these documents and having to look at it over the course of time. The reader slowly pieces together what happened to Stratos and his friends and what is currently going on with the Expeditionary Force on Equestria. The simplest way to order this is recognizing that anything that does not mention Stratos being present is happening "now." Most of the story focuses on the past. Only tidbits of the "present" are shown. Still, you're right, I need to rethink this.
And don't worry I will explain why Krastos is so bad. One of the three main points of this story was to make the character "Krastos the Glue Maker" into an actual villain. To show just what would happen if something as powerful as Discord existed but was not portrayed comically. It is something I felt should not be shown all at once or the impact would be lost.
Regardless, seriously, thanks for commenting. One of my biggest fears was that no one would read it because, yeah, it is unconventionally written.
Oh, and just to make this clear for everyone, all thoughts and criticism is appreciated and I will try and respond to every comment. I know I am not the best writer and I need to know both what I am doing wrong and what I am doing right.
Anything about the writing, the story, an event, or really anything you want me to elaborate on or clarify, I will. (Provided that it isn't too spoiler heavy.)
:O first comment I feel like a boss! Anyway really good first chapter I didn't really spot any errors on grammar (being a grammar Nazi myself) The plot seems to be based around mystery :) anyway going to continue reading
D: R.I.P Guardman Kaze if you would have been an excellent Royal guard! He was a really good sid character you introduced
hope you can imtoduce more like him and possibly be incorporated into the story 
continue the good work comrade
443073 (Finally time to respond.) Thanks, I'll correct that mistake right away.
I wish I saw Memento but from what I gather... unfortunately I am not good enough to pull off a story exactly like that. That said, this is two stories running in parallel with one happening partly as a result of the other. The past is the situation and the present is the reaction to the situation. The past is the story, the present is the moral dilemma, a sort of "what should we do now?"
That's a good analysis of the story. Yeah, you will find out what happened (at least to Stratos) and if you pay close attention there are a lot of hints (and outright statements) here and there about the history of this world and both humanity's and Krastos's relation to it before the... final events. Thanks for commenting!
445464
Thanks, I try and make every character have their own little thing about them. Each plays their part and Kaze is actually very important.
And I shall continue this work soon enough. I will hopefully get the next chapter up today or tomorrow. (I chose a really stupid time to post this story given how unnaturally busy I am this week and next.
) Thank you for the comments!
Krastos sounds like Kratos, which comes from Cratos... Ah, whatever. May as well give this a try.
~Jack
448070 Yup,
I got those names mixed up quite a few times writing this. And I named the main character Stratos. So we have, Stratos, Krastos, and Kratos... 
for clarity.
Anyways, the name "Krastos the Glue Maker" came from the NPR interview with Bill Clinton. It was a slight meme for a while before it kind of just faded away. It never really went anywhere. I decided to make something out of it with the story not realizing how confusing it could be. So, it is not related to Kratos/Cratos if that's what you are thinking.
Thanks for giving the story a shot.
Hrm. An interesting modern-business/organization in Equestria thing. (Thank god it's not another 'I r marine n' now I r in dah pony land AND I JUST SO HAPPENED TO BE A BRONY AND KNOW ALOT BOUT THEM N' STUFF.)
Anywho, it's interesting and I'll track it to see where it goes. Also, I found you thanks to your post on HiE cliches and I think you might be interested in my story so, if you want, I'd be appreciative if you gave it a shot.
510508 Well I'm glad you decided to check it out.
Yeah, when I wrote this story I was seeing a ton of, "I got to Equestria and I was turned into a pony," or "I know all about Equestria." And more recently it seems, "I am a soldier brought to Equestria" has become quite popular. I wanted to do a story where one human was the main character but that he was not familiar with the place yet was smart enough to survive on his own and would want to get involved with this world if something big was happening. Also, he would be one out of many other humans involved in the story.
In addition, I wanted to address the significance of humans being real for Equestrians which so many stories seemed to gloss over.
All of this while not getting bogged down in philosophy and still providing an entertaining read to anyone that happened by... I might have been a bit ambitious.
And sure, I'll check out your story...
Wait a second, I know I saw your story before. I read the description, saw the picture, and said, "Gee that looks interesting." I must have forgot to add it to my read list. 
I'll remedy that as soon as possible.
512442
Niftytastic. I hope you at least enjoy my story and feel free to comment on it once you've read it a bit. I'll be reading a bit more o' this in the meantime.
Zed - 1
Elly - 177
Zed, better get ready to dig yourself a grave of shame.
629620 Nah. No graves for him. He's pretty much immortal. This means he has to live with the shame FOREVER!
All i have to say is bravo sir your story is Eq standerd also i to are cursed to play dark souls to much
LONG LIVE THE DARK WRAITHS ya but beside that your story deserves much more credit than it gets Edit: also i like the story progression you have 1 big chapter where shit happens and then you have these mini logs they supplement each outer well
643698 The Dark Wraiths? I curse you foul invaders! But that's okay because now you can fight ghosts. (Dark Souls logic!
)
I'm glad you like the story
. I tried to build a story that avoided all the cliches of other human in Equestria stories [i.e. chosen one, turned into pony, misunderstood on Earth but loved in Equestria (by now it should be incredibly obvious Stratos deserved much of the hate he got), is a brony, etc.] and add a few fun twists of my own. (Magically enchanted power armor!)
Luckily, slowly but surely people are starting to read it and there are still plenty of chapters left to go. Also, after listening to the EQD Pre-reader Q&A (naturally while playing Dark Souls) it sounds like my story might actually have a chance to get posted on EQD and every bit of encouragement everyone has given me makes me think I might have a shot. It would certainly help with the views count. Still, whether or not they would accept a story like this I'm a little iffy about.
I'm also glad you like my current story set-up. The original story draft just consisted of the main chapters but I found I could get so much more of the back-story out in the open if I did those little "subchapters." After all, I felt it important to point out, yes, there are other humans and they are doing stuff.
And finally, thank you for the comment
.
I have thought up a review for the first 3 chapters sorry if i sound like an ass but this is in hope of improving your story Ok here i go. -The first few thousand words are one massive expository infodump. There's no actual story in there; it's just setting up the scene. For a few thousand words. This makes it very hard for a reader (or, at least, me) to get to the actual story. I'm aware that you say your main character Stratos writes for the sake of writing or something along those lines. It kind of legitimizes the rambling from a character standpoint, but that doesn't make the story any less uninteresting. Worse, it makes your character sound unnecessarily verbose. For example, you spend the first 1.5-ish thousand words talking about an unknown conflict, giving the human's life story, and setting up the narrative frame.
-Worse yet, it starts off from the perspective of the human. The human perspective might have been excusable were it more engaging, but combined with the exposition point above, this is more or less a death sentence. On top of that, the human talks to himself through parentheticals in what I can only assume are official reports. Those parentheticals sound more like excerpts from diary entries or LiveJournal musings than anything else. Hearing your character describe himself also strongly hints towards Mary Sue tendencies. For example, he is "a self-taught expert in almost every field of study you can think of. [...] In that process, and in a short span of time, [he] had accomplished many notable achievements." The given name Stratos from a Canadian does not help matters in the least, either.
-The encounter with the ponies is incredibly lackluster. You detail the encounter with one paragraph and the enthusiasm or surprise as a child who has received a pair of socks for his or her birthday. "Within the first week we scouted out and discovered our first civilization. It was a simple pony town but there are literally no words to describe how amazed I was at this disjcovery." And then you go on to literally have no words about his amazement. It'd be like saying "There are no words to describe how amazed I am at another being in another universe that somehow developed a language identical to the one we use on earth as our lingua franca through thousands of years of social and political influence. Also, they bear strong resemblance to ponies on earth. And they sometimes have flight and magic. So instead of describing any sort of reaction, I'll pass it off as normal, then describe what they are."
-"And I just realized I am really off topic." This line right here details quite thoroughly a large problem of your story; that is to say, there is no coherent story. It's just establishing in-story facts to be taken in instead of events.
-And then you pull android ponies out of thin air, as well as the (for lack of a better phrase) cultural enviromental sentiment.
-The script parts come off as flat and emotionless. The characters speak with wooden dialogue, and the tone does not help matters. You say that Stratos and Nick "had always been the best of friends. Practically brothers", but that's all you do--you say it. Saying it does not show the depth of their relationship in any way.
In summary, -Your exposition is too dense to read. -Your main character is unrelatable. So is Nick. -There are several plot and characterization inconsistencies. -The "humanity bad, ponies good" angle is far overplayed, and your story does not hint towards any change in the standard script for those stories. -There is a very serious lack of pony.
Besides that your story gets much better later on. T.
God... when im in review mode i sound like an ass...
. Oh well
654701 Oh don't worry about it. I'm glad you have pointed out some things that you didn't like. I've been waiting for someone to say something is wrong and be fairly elaborate about it.
Even if it did make sense as part of some kind of unofficial report.
I will admit, one of the weakest aspects about this story is that it gets better as it goes along. To be honest, I don't really like the first two major chapters of this story (Stratos's and Zed's) either. They are far too slow. And it was in the middle of the last major chapter (Elly's) that I realized, "You know, script format for dialogue is kind of dumb."
Thanks, I'll try and go back to those first two chapters and see what I can do sometime. Hopefully, I won't have to scrap it if I want to change it. If I do I might just have to leave it as is and wait until the next story work in your advice. Any advice for what to focus on to change the beginning to be better? (i.e. focus less on Equestria, add more action, change Stratos's overt character, etc.)
654672
Now going back to your other post, I will agree with everything you said except for a few points.
1. This is not an official report, it is something Startos is doing because he feels like it. (That's why he does this all the time. They are kind of like thoughts he would write down in a journal.)
2. I hate the "humans are bad, ponies are good" cliche and I hate having to use it with my main character. On the first draft I actually tried to make the story with Stratos being a humanist and it turned out meh because it removed all conflict with the character. One thing I was hoping to do was highlight that this is a bad view to take as it kind of messed Stratos up. But if that hurts the story too much in the beginning, then I need to find a better way to explain it.
Actually, if you don't mind me asking, with all of the problems in the beginning, why did you keep reading? Was there something that kept you coming back or did you give me the benefit of the doubt?
655119 well some advice is show dont tell and you allso need to elaborate. Because i was wondering why nick and stratos where friends? And as i said before the first chapter is like a giant infodump and as i said before show dont tell and you need to make it more engaging in the begging. Because i felt like you where saying something like this "stratos dosent like humans he has a chance to stay in equestria theres evil stuff he kills it" and you need more pony interaction in the beginning because you know because its in equestria. On another note your story was interesting so i wanted to see where you went with it ... oh god that was alot of rambling well thats my thoughts (puts on sun glas
ses) Stay frosty
Ahh i made a shit load of grammarcal errors sorry im writing on my phone .. and i said show dont tell twice -sigh- oh well OH YEA i guess i agree with you on the stratos crazy in the mind thing
655215 Wait, so it was interesting even though the main character was unrelatable and there was a ton of unneeded exposition?
How the heck did I do that?
"you also need to elaborate. Because I was wondering why Nick and Stratos where friends?" Okay, I'll definitely explain more clearly.
Already thinking of ways to cut down on the exposition. Thanks for the help. I think I know what to do. Again, any more help, reviews, advice, would be greatly appreciated. After all, no story of mine is ever going to get through the EQD pre-readers if there are problems this glaring.
655364 no problem also Eq prereaders if the first chapters of your story are like that of this story they would stop reading and tell you the errors and i will try to review any new chapters you come out with if i have the time
good day to you sir
will we ever find out why stratos and nick where friends? Will stratos ever get over his emotional problems? How will the unknown guardians deal with there inevitable failure? Will you answer all these questions? Ok all of that is some plot points you could cover in your story. Ok some problems it seems a bit unrealistic he could get over that argument in one talk. But not a major flaw and i have another question. Will this story end with stratos or the humans that came after stratos attacking kratos?
666516 Yes I will answer the questions. Both in story and here.
"How will the unknown guardians deal with there inevitable failure?"
Technically, we already found out. But... how should i say this? Let me say that they will have to make a choice that is completely unacceptable to them but absolutely necessary.
"Ok some problems it seems a bit unrealistic he could get over that argument in one talk."
He didn't. Smith and Stratos talked for a lot which made him more open to ideas. Unfortunately, I had to be brief about that. If I had gone over everything they said it would have taken me another three thousand or more words and the chapter was already long enough. I had to cut those conversations and imply their results.
Regardless, Elly merely came in when she knew Stratos would be more receptive to the information. By then, he knew he screwed up. Besides, he didn't really get over his problems, he found a different objective that could be solved which improved his mood.
"will we ever find out why stratos and nick where friends?"
Originally, I was going to save that for late in the story but when you brought it up for Stratos's chapter (and my alpha reader asked the same question) I decided I should answer that at least in part in the beginning. I have already rewritten both Stratos's and Zed's chapters to fix some of your previous criticisms. I have not uploaded the edits yet and I probably won't do so until late today or some time early tomorrow. I am just waiting for my alpha reader to read them so that I can be sure I didn't botch anything. If you read the chapters when they come out, it should help clarify why they were friends. (Hint: Nick is too nice of a guy not to be friends with Stratos.)
"Will this story end with stratos or the humans that came after stratos attacking Krastos?"
Stratos and the guardians will encounter Krastos. They will fight it. You'll see.
For the other humans, you will have to see.
I will spoil something. Note that, while self-contained, this story was always meant to be a prequel to a much more epic story that focused primarily on ponies and their world. That story just became far too big to have something like this going on at the same time so "The Krastos Logs" became its own story.
Thanks again. As always, I appreciate the input.
Armor incorporated has gods backing them! Where some of them the gods celestia was talking about?
691539 I've been thinking about how to respond to this without saying too much, but after a week of thought I think I will just need to be fairly straightforward.
Actually, Greeg (an employee of Armor Incorporated) was saying The Nine Unknown Men have the gods backing them but he and most other Armor Incorporated employees do not care. He's basically telling them, "Screw your gods, we make our own decisions. You don't own us. You can't control us. Here, let me prove it by hacking into your database and releasing one of your secret documents."
So... yeah. The relations between the Unknown and Armor Incorporated are being strained by the current situation.
As for your question... Yes. With all of the implications behind that.
Those 2 chapters where freaking awsome i really liked the change of perspective to it was a nice change of pace. But that reaper guy he is a baddass just saying.
786479 Really?
Honestly, the more I looked at them, the more I thought these chapters were terrible. 
I changed perspectives because (at the time) I too needed a change of pace and was sick of writing for Stratos. I also did it to work on voice but I thought that the result was a sub-par new character and chapter. I'm happy to know that was not the case.
Next chapter will be more normal, mostly, but I suppose I have some things to consider for the next major chapters... Not that there are many left.
I'm glad you liked Reaper.
I actually had to cut out a ton of description because I focused on him for too long. Reaper is an important character in nearly all of my stories so perhaps you'll be happy to know that you will see him in the future. (Although I guess that should be obvious because I wouldn't just bring him up for no reason.)
Complains about all the evil and selfish humans
Upset when he learns that he isnt that special and has a tantrum
What a dick.....
800468 Hypocrisy at its finest isn't it? Even I wanted to punch him in the face when I was writing this chapter. But at least somepony calls him out on it right?
You've seen him do good things but this is how he acted back on Earth and why so many are happy that he's gone. If you understand that, then I've done my job... and hopefully the story is good enough that you'll keep reading even after you hate him.
This was late ugh.... i have over 125 unread chapters and i finaly caught up good job so far but yet still the view counts are disappointing...