Have you ever been?

by RarityEQM

That place in the forest.

Where do I begin?

Have you ever been there? To the forest, I mean.

They call me 'crazy' I can understand that. It's not a term that's alien to me. Fitting really, when you think about it. Of course I'm crazy.

I didn't choose to be this way. I didn't wake up, that morning, deciding to do what I did. It just sort of happened.

No.
No.
No.

I started off that day just like you did. Just like you. We're not that different,. It's really kind of funny. We were the same, and now, we're different- but still the same. See, it crept up on me, and took me by surprise- like someone sank a knife into my back and twisted and it made everything in the whole wide world funny, cause thats when everything stopped making sense.

After a while...after a while, it all stops making sense. And thats when the clarity comes. The slow horrible, agonizing clarity. It doesn't give you much of a choice. One day, your sitting there, depressed and broken and bleak, and the next second it comes for you. It completely blindsides you. Takes you by surprise, wrapping it's cold, dark claws around your neck and refusing to let go.. It always hurts at first, realizing that the world your living in, the place you built up all your walls, and rules, and structured your life- is just laughing at you. Stability is a joke. It's all one big joke. And thats the key. Thats the magic. It's just a joke. There ARE no rules. There ARE no absolutes. You can't know everything, because there's nothing to learn.You could learn something, but the next day it might be proven false, and then all that you learned is gone! You wasted the time. Time all gone, away, eaten up like a cake. And you never get it back.

See.

I.

Think.

Thats funny.

You could spend allllll your time thinking that the color of that ball is red, until someday, someone comes along and tells you your colorblind. Then...then that ball isn't really red. It's all been a lie. It's all been just a trick. How can you know what to believe after that? It's all fake. There's nothing but the thin reality, created by ponies trying hard to cling to an emptiness that weaves through their dim little lives.

It's kind of crazy.

There aren't any rules. How can you follow rules when there aren't any? The 'rules' we created, bend and break. Twilight discovered NEW magic. We spent so much time learning about magic that we knew about, while there was a magic we never even knew existed right under our hoof tips. And then she became a princess. A princess. The world is changing, constantly, swirling, spinning, and all these ponies trying to cling to these sad little rules they've made for their world.
When everything could change in an instant.

But you wanna know what happened, don't you? Thats why I'm here...isn't it? Thats the funny part. I'll get to it. It's like a big joke, so you gotta build it up. It's strange, but It's gonna make sense. I promise. See we got lost. She wanted flowers. She said it would be fun, so I went with her. Into the forest, I mean. We went in there together. They were deep in the forest. Deep. So deep.

In the forest. We were wandering around, and theres nothing but trees and trees and more trees. And she was my friend, but in the forest, there are no friends. How can there be? And thats where you start to see. Thats when the 'crazy' kicks in. Thats when the rules stop being rules, and the only ones you have are the ones you create for yourself.

Did I say we got lost?

I don't know for how long. It was a really long time. I think. Lots of days. Lost for days. Maybe weeks? I really can't recall. But there we were. In the forest.

It's against the law to stab another pony, right? Against the law to bash her head in with a rock, because she's so much better than you. So much prettier than you. The responsible one, the dependable one. The pony every pony loves, because she's so prim and proper and perfect. And your not. You're nothing like her, but you see the way they look at her. They talk to her like she's normal. They don't roll their eyes, or laugh, when she talks. They
RESPECT
her.
But not here. Not in the forest. No one respects anyone in the forest.

You start thinking, there aren't any rules. You can take her place, even if she is so much better than you. But not here she isn't. Out there, in the middle of the forest, there's nopony to tell her how utterly delightful she is. Or how good her table manners are. Or how wonderful her pristine, purple mane bounces with her steps. No, beauty doesn't -exist- out here. It's only in the eye of the beholder. And out here there are no laws. There's nothing to enforce them, nothing to keep you bound to your morals- except for your own values, and your own morals, and your own sense of self righteousness.

But everypony has different values, right? Different belief systems. They can't all add up. Really, so how are there laws in a place where there are no ponies to enforce them?

There aren't.

All that kept me from bashing her pretty little skull in, was not being able to look myself in the mirror the next morning. But there are no mirrors in the forest. Could I live with myself? Could you?

Thats the scary part.

The most frightening part.

The crazy part.

Thats the funny part.

You'd be surprised what some ponies are capable of living with. Someponies are probably capable of living with something you can't. Some ponies are capable of getting over little things like murder. Some ponies don't even KNOW what they're capable of...until...they realize...there are no rules in the forest, except the ones you make yourself...and if you discover that you're capable of crushing her pretty pony skull...who's to say that she's not capable of doing such things. Thats what shes thinking about.

Yeah... she was playing dumb. Trying to trick me. I know she was. I KNOW thats what she was doing. But it wasn't going to work. I knew what I had to do. She was trying to distract me, trying to trick me. But I wasn't gonna let her.

Now it just comes down to who strikes first. She isn't looking at me. She's babbling on and on about some map. Who cares. Maps are pointless in the forest. Nopony around to read them. Directions stopped making sense a while ago. Endless forest as far as the eye can see. Go north for 3 miles. More forest. Go south for eight miles. More forest. Scream for help, try to find a way back, a path, a trail, a marker! ANYTHING!! WHY WON'T SOMEPONY HELP ME!!! I WANT TO GO HOME I WANT TO MAKE IT STOP I WANT TO GO BACK TO WHO I WAS.

Forest forest forest.

forest

foResT

FORESt

FOReST

Forest

For

Est

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffF
o
r
e
s
t

Ffoorreesstt

I pick up a rock.
Foret

s

F
O

REsT

I pick up a rock. Did I say that already? Rock.

I hit her with it. Hard. She wasn't paying attention. She wasn't even looking at me. No rules. No laws. I hit her with it. Hard. And when she kept moving, I hit her with it. Hard.

Again, and again, and again.

And.

Again.

Again
Again.

Again
Again.

Again

Again.

Again.

Again.

Again.

Again.

Again

Again.

Again.

Again.
I know a lot about rocks. There are lots of kinds. My sister used to push Rocks. Well, me and my sister. Twilight says it should be Again. My sister and I. I wonder if she memorized the library. All of it. All of again the books in there, just so she could tell agains about how they speak incorragainectly. She's so stuck up, some times. Always again acting like

Igneous.
Sedimentary.
again.
I know about all of the rocks. again.

Again

Again.

Again.

again.

again

again

again

again

again

again

Again

AGAIN

Again

Again

Again

again

again

again

again
and.
Again.

Until she stopped. She stopped moving, and there was blood everywhere. It was everywhere, and I knew it was ok, because she stopped moving. And there isn't any reason to think that she wouldn't have done the same to me. No reason, because there are no rules in the forest. Have you ever been there? The Forest, I mean.

I wanna leave, but once your in the forest, you can't leave. Thats the beauty of it. Thats the magic of the forest. There's nothing you can do about it. It's always there. Endless trees no matter where you look. No matter how you slice it, you're trapped.

I picked up a rock. Did I say that already? About the rock?

After a while, it's kind of like you understand the forest. And the forest understands you. Thats why you're here, you see? In the forest? Because it's lonely...and it needs to give ponies reminders that we're all lost and hopeless and helpless and crying and scared.

Thats why I made the blood come out. She was scared. I was scared. I had to do it, because there aren't any rules. Not in the forest. She would have done the same to me. I got there first. It was kind of like a little race. It all makes perfect sense. See? They call me crazy, but I'm really the sane one. Everyone else, is just running around, pretending to follow their perfect little rules in their perfect little lives, and they have NO idea how close they are, to having it all come crashing down around them. No idea. They can't see all the trees. The trees are EVERYWHERE and they just walk right by. Walk right by, pretending they aren't right here next to me. They're the crazy ones. All I did was what the forest told me I could do. You've been there, right? To the forest I mean?

No?

You should visit, sometime.

When you get the chance.

It's a really lovely place.

The forest, I mean.

Author's Note:

A horror piece, depicting the way a certain crazy pony sees the world.

I was TRYING to write some good ole fashioned mind ****ery, and horror. HORROR. I know, it's completely out of character...
but maybe it's not. Maybe thats how a pony would slowly go crazy. I don't know, but it was fun to explore this aspect!
I thought it was good, but really, it's just a practice piece for the genre.

So dooooon't freak out too hard!

I think I played around TOO much with it though. I wanted to illustrate Pinkie's decent into madness as a sort of...look into her mind while she's speaking. She goes off on tangents, remembering things that aren't important, but blurting them out in betwixt her own thoughts- which are held together by a very thin line of string.

Comments

[Mooncalf]

Quite sinister. Unsettling. A look into a mind that has been under pressure for a long time - being surrounded by more accomplished ponies, constantly treated as an immature adult child - and finally finding an outlet as everything breaks down and the constraints of society is ripped away.

Not scary as such, because we see and understand everything that's happening and we're spoilered from the start, but unsettling, sinister, creepy, lugubrious. Evocative.

A very interesting read. Not very meaningful, but a good exercise. One has to experiment now and then.

[RarityEQM]

4603090
Your right! That opening spoiler sucks! LEts do something about that...Thank you, Mooncalf. And I'm STILL working on reading your tale, darling <3

[Mooncalf]

4603831 Lovely. Looking forward to it. Of course, you don't have to take on the entire whopper in one go. I just really need some feedback. The ending's going to be a doozy... I'm so lost.

[Heart of Blades]

....*goes to read this*.....*is creeped out so I dont*......*just reads the damn fic*

Huh, that was crazy! lol. I really liked the wacky spacing that was going on, I could tell you so had fun with that. This was pretty simply, nice and creepy. I kept wondering if forest was a metaphor for something, but if it was I sure have no idea for what. While ready I kept having flashbacks to Blair Witch, Slender, Yellow Brick Road and other crazy lost in the forest stuff. Overall I felt you did a find job of showing a pretty insane Pinkie, but staying true to how she is and how she thinks, not going overboard like other crazy Pinkie fics. Definitely a fun read