Twilight's No. 1 Assistant
Loyalty Mission 2: Neon Element Pt. 2
By Wanderer D
Vinyl groaned and shook her head, trying to figure out what had woken her up. She pushed up on her bed unsteadily, head pounding, stomach feeling like it was about to forcefully expel her dinner along with all the vodka she had drank with Twilight.
She shook her head in amazement, and immediately regretted it. Twilight could drink a lot. A lot. How she was still standing when Vinyl had passed out was anypony's guess.
She tried to make sense of her surroundings and realized that she was in her room and the lights were off. Someone had thrown her onto the bed and haphazardly covered her with her bedsheets. At least they had done that. Other ponies in previous nights like this had simply left her where she had passed out until the next morning.
But some noise had woken her up, and then there it was again! It sounded... muffled, somehow. The door to the rest of her appartment was open, so she could tell most of the lights were off, but there was a strange, blue light emanating from somewhere, as well as voices and that strange muffled sound.
Vinyl carefully made her way towards the flickering blue light, turning around into the kitchen, where Wrex and Twilight Sparkle stood, facing a seated, gagged and bound earth pony with a drum and sticks cutie mark.
Is that-Is that Rim Shot?! What the?! Her thoughts stopped when Celestia's apprentice spoke.
"Oh, playing tough, eh, Rim Shot?" Twilight Sparkle chuckled walking slowly around the drummer, her magic levitated a large combat knife, letting it caress Rim Shot's coat and making him shudder. "Do you want Mr. Wrex to let go of the button?" She asked in a sing-song voice. "That thing in his hand is a detonator, you know?"
The pony whimpered, ball gag allowing him to moan in despair and fear as some drool escaped from the holes in the ball.
Vinyl noticed that there were several gray squares connected with wires between his legs, and that Wrex was chuckling while holding some sort of tube with a red button on it.
Twilight giggled. "It only takes a second and you'll be a different pony."
Rim Shot wailed in despair, chewing on the ball gag in desperation, making Twilight raise an eyebrow. "I don't think he wants to talk, Wrex."
"Ehehehehe," Wrex chuckled again, his smile widening as he leaned in. "I guess he doesn't mind his own, personal genophage."
Vinyl was about to say something when she felt a hoof on her shoulder. She spun around, eyes wide when she noticed a wary-looking Octavia. Her bow-tie was half-tied, and her mane was a mess. "Shh. Don't spoil their fun... I need a break," she whispered.
"But they're torturing a pony!" Vinyl hissed, trying to drag Octavia out of the room.
The earth pony, however, shrugged. "I don't care," she said walking to the empty bottles on the counter and rummaging around until she found a bottle of whiskey. "Twilight kept me up all night until she thought up this plan, I want to have another drink, then pass out."
"B-but!"
A high-pitched whine and a gurgle drew her attention back to Twilight and company.
"Huh," Wrex said, poking Rim Shot's head with his claw. "He passed out. Didn't tell us anything," he sounded impressed.
"I'm more convinced now that they are an organized unit like the Blue Suns," Twilight said. "No pony could have resisted this torture so far. We need to wake him up and use real force this time!"
It was then that a horrible realization crossed Vinyl's mind. Twilight Sparkle was so drunk she appeared in full control of her faculties. It was entirely possible that Twilight was continuously drunk and because she seemed in control nopony ever noticed. How... just how bad was this?
"Uh... guys?" She called. "I'm not sure if you're playing good cop and bad cop..."
"Nah," Twilight rolled her eyes and rolled the combat knife in the air. "That's for amateurs! We're doing bad cop, psycho merc!"
"Well, either way, he won't be able to answer your questions unless you take the ball gag out of his mouth."
Twilight gave her an entirely blank look before blinking and focusing on the gag. "Well, shit." She looked at Wrex. "I forgot about that! Why didn't you say anything?"
Wrex shrugged. "I thought it was hilarious."
Vinyl face-hoofed and shook her head. This... this is just horrible! How can they do this? And this is what Octavia is dating?! I'm going to have words with her!
Her thoughts were once more interrupted by Rim Shot, who sputtered in surprise as an ice-cold bucket of water was splashed on his face. She quickly stepped back into the shadows, not wanting to do anything with this. He stared around wildly and whined in horror until Twilight Sparkle snarled in his face.
"SHUT UP!" she shouted. "Nopony but us can hear you! I cast a silencing spell in the apartment! I'm going to remove the gag and you're going to tell me what I want to know, and if you don't I'll make sure that the only drum you'll ever be able to use in the future is your tympanic membrane! Got it?"
Rim Shot nodded wildly stopping when Twilight smacked the back of his head and then undid his gag.
"Y-you monsters!" Rim Shot gasped. "When I report you to the authorities yo—"
"The authorities?" Twilight Sparkle snorted. "I am the authority. I respond to nopony but Princess Celestia herself. And we have proof that you broke into Vinyl Scratch's apartment and trashed it, as well as proof that you and your "friends" intend to cause her bodily harm during the concert tomorrow night!"
"Technically, it's tonight," Wrex offered.
"Tonight!" Twilight said, not taking her eyes off of Rim Shot.
Vinyl's blood ran cold.
"I don't know wha—"
"Don't lie to me!" Twilight growled, pressing her combat knife against his neck. "You think you're safe. That just because you're a pony you'll get away with a slap on the wrist! Its not how it works!"
"That is how it works!" Rim Shot argued in a high voice. "The Princess—"
"Is not here!" Twilight snarled. "If the only form of authority you recognize is the princess, then get it through your thick skull the only 'princess' here is me!"
Wrex started laughing.
"Shut up, Wrex!"
"Sure thing," Wrex said grinning as he bowed. "Princess."
Twilight glowered at him, before returning her attention to Rim Shot. "Listen here, we saw on your wall that you had a poster of tomorrow's—"
"Tonight's."
"Tonight's concert with the date circled in red and several little pony skulls drawn around it as well as Vinyl's name underlined twice with the words: "Once she's gone we'll shine", now I don't know about you, Rim Shot, but to me that sounds like a threat of bodily harm."
Rim Shot cringed, but then shut his eyes and growled. "Of course I want her gone! Gone forever! She ruined us! She took off and left us to dry and die! Who in Tartarus is she to strike out and ruin our lives?"
Twilight carefully lifted the stallion's chin, making him open his eyes and look deeply into hers as she tenderly caressed his cheek.
And then she head-butted him.
"Ow!" he wailed. "Ow! Ow! What the—"
"Listen, loser," Twilight spoke deliberately. "Vinyl Scratch is not only successful due to her own efforts, she's a member of my team. I won't let some moron with rancid breath accuse her of ruining his life when you haven't done shit to fix it! So what if she left? Was she the one responsible for playing every single instrument in the band?" She pushed him back with a hoof, and he fell on his back, wincing in pain. Twilight stood over him. "Of course not! You could have pulled together the pieces of your mediocre band and made something out of it! You are only blaming her for your own failures because you're not pony enough to face them!"
Rim Shot looked away, but then noticed Vinyl Scratch, looking at him in silence and he couldn't tear his eyes away.
"So here's what we're going to do," Twilight said, almost sweetly as she levitated the chair back up to its standing position and used her magic to force Rim Shot to look at her. "You are going to tell me what you and your little band of losers were planning for tomorrow..."
"Tonight."
"...tonight. And we're going to catch the rest of them. And you will help us because it's the right thing to do. Right?"
Still looking at Vinyl Scratch, Rim Shot nodded.
Wrex chuckled. "Excellent. But first, I need a drink," he tossed the detonator onto the table and grabbed the nearest bottle.
Immediately the plastic squares between the legs of Rim Shot started beeping and flashing while he started hyperventilating.
Rolling her eyes, Twilight unplugged a couple of cables and the beeping stopped. "Wrex!"
Wrex turned to ask what was wrong, but at that moment foam came out of Rim Shot's mouth and his eyes rolled back into his skull. Both ponies and the alien looked at the twitching earth pony for a full minute before the silence was broken.
"What?" Wrex finally asked.
Lmfao. Damnit Wrex, why you so awesome?
Some kind of celestial event. No— no words. No words to describe it. Poetry! They should have sent a poet. So beautiful. So beautiful... I had no idea.
oh my sides. i will try to write again when they stop hurting
This Twilight is sociopathic!
It's great! Hilarious! More good sir, more!
...Eh, this may be going a bit too far. While Wrex may have been all for torture before Shepard, unless the Commander went full Renegade, I don't see him doing this for shits and giggles. Nor can I see Twi doing that.
this is awesome! and Vinyls theory on how twilight functions in her day to day life is very intriguing!
God, I love this story
That was fun, may I have another? Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Just wait till season 4.
D... you're a sick man...
I LOVE YOU, MAN!
bring another round, i am thirsty.
5779734
AU tag is best tag.
looked at the twitching earth pony
1. Just a little extra spacing.
So Twilight can't day right but is always punctual. Could she ever be punctually late or punctually early to events then if Wrex or bopony else reminded her?
So, Twilight's Archer now?
5779734 The kicker is that, given the ending of this chapter, Rim Shot wasn't actually in danger of being blown up. While I think Wrex might condemn violent torture, (ie beating something/electroshocks/ect) this was pure psychological. The 'detonator' in Wrex's is quite real, the explosives are not. Scaring some bastard like Rim Shot nearly to death, I can totally see Wrex doing that. Wrex LIKES inflicting terror after all.
5779734 I can see him doing almost anything to get results... But I can't see him cracking a genophage joke. That's serious business for Krogans
5780310 I wouldn't know, I've never watched Archer... but no, she's not always drunk.
5779679 I'll take that as a rhetorical question.
5779683 They better not send me! I'd botch it with my mediocre poetry!
5779684 Take a deep breath...
5779723 Renegade Twilight ftw!
5779734 Wrex had some time to mold her as well... but I do see your point, worry not. Just ask 5779723: No one here is exactly what he appears. Also, pretty much what 5780429 said: even at her worst, Twi would not cross certain lines. Remember that she looks up to Shepard, even though he/she's filtered down through Wrex!
5779810 It is an intriguing, and frightening prospect, isn't it?
5779995 Shh! Spoilers!
5780027 I love you too, bro! I'm getting over the cold though, I won't be sick soon!
5780238 Fixing as soon as I post this comment... as for Twily.... remember she's been drinking.
5779662 5779781 5779831 5780057 5780185 Glad you guys are enjoying the story! More will come!
Ah, Renegade interrupts. They never get old.
And Twilight is always drunk. She's drunk on being Twilight mothering Sparkle.
5779683
Thanks for that. Now I need to watch Contact again.
WHY DON'T YOU WRITE MORE FREQUENTLY??!?1 WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?????!!!!!!!
5780653
Even so, it makes Twilight feel a little too bit OOC, and it breaks my SOD.
5780429 a good example if that is when Wrex threatens to eat a guard on noveria
5780653
Hey, I don't crib lines off the great G'Kar!
I got my own shtick!
5781242
You say that like it is a bad thing
5783367
I just don't want to look at Jake Busey.
d1w7nqlfxfj094.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/jake-busey-contact.jpg
Give him some blue body paint and he'll look like a Wraith.
This place is so messed up... I love it!
had it been shepard he would have talked long before they needed explosives.
5787773 I'll cut your balls off and sell them to a krogan!
5789386 i wasn't speaking against wrex. wrex is awesome incarnate there is no arguing that, just saying twilight's methods are lacking if she had a krogun and needed to resort to the methods she did.
5789950 I didn't mean anything by it . I was just quoting something renegade Shepard said In a interrogation to go along with your point.
This isn't regular drunk... this is... ADVANCED DRUNK.
5843451 Let it be written. Let it be done.
Loving this! Every chapter has me cracking up, looking forward to more! Can't wait to see how this gig goes down.
Please keep writing, I'll keep reading!
Welp.
This amused me.
5843451 No not Advanced Drunk. This is Sage Level Drunk
Twilight sparkle is a fuck- mothering unicorn, she kicked a lot of adds to achieve that title and deserves to be called as such.
Renegade Twilight is best Twilight.
You have Wrex's personality down perfectly. Such as the blatant disregard for basic safety and that "saying" Krogan have in the previous chapter,
5954019
Nah, More along the lines of 'I can't find my fucking toes and holy shit it's four in the morning' drunk.
Why?
Okay ... I'm starting to run out of things to say here ... so here goes:
Since I have no idea how to nod wildly stopping, I suspect that there should be a comma in that.
Which one's which
Maybe living with a krogan, who have an extra heart and probably about a dozen spare livers?
Rim Shot had it coming... Got away way to easy...
Love you'r story ♡
Working armed alcoholic... Neat!
Here is where the fun begins
9905560
Yep... Twilight will not be killed by a enemy but alcohol abuse...
9753099
Pretty sure if we ask nicely Wrex can enlighten us.
*Hears a gun being loaded* Nevermind...
9765096
Now that you mentioned it... Damn
7560561
Yeah... Not ever race has the benefit of a redundant nerve system...
6976094
Don't you mean drunken renegade?
6280699
Damn.fine.point!
5954019
To bad she can't reach the level above that. No redundant organs...
5787773
Words can hurt deeper than a knife. Also a knife left evidance behind...
5780897
HA! GOOD ONE! well done
5780027
One of the best we have on Fimfiction ♡
Absolutely priceless re-reading experiences
Twilight is renegade for life, unreasonable even if playing nice might work. Indeed raised by a Krogan...
Let's hope he has enough bad guys to keep her busy.