• Published 12th Feb 2014
  • 661 Views, 29 Comments

Look Harder, Luna, and You Will See the Truth - Dustin Lange

Ponies have feared Luna since her return, but that is about to change, with the help of Twilight Sparkle.

  • ...

The Pink One

Author's Note:

Chapter specific tag: Gore.
For brief and mild descriptions.
Rated Teen to be safe.

The Pink one

"Why Pinkie, she was the leader of the scared fillies and colts, was she not?" Luna asked inquisitively.

"Yes, but she is also easy to convince, not to say she's dumb or anything, but if we can get her to think you are good, then we also have all of the fillies and colts on our side, and that will make things a lot easier." Twilight explained.

"I see your point. Shall we get going then, there is no time to spare!" Luna said with re-found confidence

"Follow me; it's not that far from here."

"Why walk when we have magic?" Luna asked pointing to her horn.

"Pinkie lives in a sweet shop, and were going there, to have a talk with her. And it probably won't be a short talk." Twilight said in a flat tone.

"I see your point with that as well, we don't want to get fat, do we?" with that, they were on their way to enact Twilight's first step of the plan.

"Plus, we can chat on the way over." Twilight has never had a real, informal conversation with the Princess of the Night; she was really just looking for an excuse to talk to her.

"So, what made you choose to come to Ponyville and not a fancy place like Manehattan?"

"Actually, Celestia suggested I come here, she probably thought I would find you here eventually." this was Luna's first real conversation with a pony outside of the castle, and she was rather enjoying it. "She knows you pretty well and probably knew that you weren't afraid of me, thinking that, if any pony can help me, it is you. Why aren't you scared of me?"

"I..." she was caught off guard by that question, but didn't need to think of an answer, for she already had one. "Isn't it obvious..." she said, "You are clearly Princess Luna and not Nightmare Moon. Why every other pony is scared, I have no clue."

"So, you like me because of me and just not because I am a Princess, or Celestia’s sister?" she smiled to herself, knowing just how to get her worked up from listening to Celestia, for some reason, read Twilight's reports out loud and speak what she is writing back to her.

Twilight was speechless. Does Luna think I like her because I have to, or because I want to suck up to Celestia? No... she doesn't... does she? She thought to herself, not even realizing that she stopped dead in her tracks, while Luna continued on, deep in self satisfaction.

After a few seconds, Luna realized she could only here her hooves hitting the ground. "Twilight..." she waited for a response, but was met only with silence. She stopped and looked to her left and right; not seeing her target of a practical joke, she turned around, only to see Twilight a good twenty feet behind her, sitting on her flank, mouth agape and eyes wide.

Luna walked back to her and sat in front of her. "Twilight..." she poked her.”Did I break her?" she said with genuine curiosity in her voice.

Why would she think that, I would never do that to anypony, especially Luna, after all the things she went through. She felt something on her face but didn't react to it, she just delved deeper into her own thoughts. If that's what she thinks I am doing, I need to try to convince her otherwise! She finally came out of her stupor with a yell. "Princess Luna!" Luna fell her back and yelped in surprise at Twilight's sudden outburst.

"Luna, where are you?" Twilight asked while looking around.

"Down here." she responded, waving a hoof in the air.

"What are you doing on the ground?"

"You just screamed my name after not moving or making a sound for almost two full minuets!"

Twilight gave a blank stare. "Really, I-I didn't even realize."

Twilight help Luna up"We still need to talk to Pinkie, let’s go." Luna started to walk again.

It took a second for Twilight to process what Luna said, and when it finally clicked she jumped up and quickly caught up to the Princess. "Luna, do you really think that?"

"Think what, Twilight?"

"That I would like you just because you are a Princess, or because you are Celestia’s sister?"

"Oh, that? That was just a little joke, and it worked out better than I thought it would!" Luna looked proud that she was able to do that to her.

Twilight stopped for a second, then started to move again. "I knew you weren’t serious about that, and when did you get a sense of humor."

"About... five minutes ago." Luna answered, a wry smile on her lips.

"It's gonna take some time to get use to that." Twilight answered. "Well, there’s Sugar cube Corner, in all its fake closed glory."

"I can see why you would worry about going here without a little exercise first; you could eat the whole building!" Luna said, a little shocked at its appearance.

"Now you know why Pinkie is always hyper... not really, no pony knows why she is the way she is, but living here is my guess." Twilight said.

"I think that you might be right, I know I would be like her if I lived there." Luna giggled. Twilight raised an eyebrow at Luna’s laughter. "What, a princess can't laugh?"

"After you, Prin--" Twilight was suddenly silent, much to Luna's confusion.

Luna looked around for her. "Twilight? Where are you, Twilight!?"

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

"Imm-imm-hmmm!" screamed Twilight, but there was a pink hoof over her mouth, preventing her from making anything decipherable.

"Shhhhhh! That’s Nightmare Moon out there!" Pinkie half yelled half whispered.

Twilight was able to get away from the pink ponies strangely strong grip. "That’s not Nightmare Moon, Pinkie, that’s Luna." she said a little irritated.

"Well duh, I know that!" Pinkie sounded like it should be obvious to Twilight.

Twilight looked a little confused. "Then why do you run away from her like she is a dragon-hydra hybrid?"

"Because it's fun to be scared... I thought that we went over this on Nightmare Night?" Pinkie asked.

"This story is not canon with the show, Pinkie." Twilight said.

Pinkie looked confused. "What does canon mean... and what show?"

"That doesn’t' mater right now, all that does matter is that you do not act scared of her from now on, can you do that for not only me, but Luna as well?" Twilight had a pleading look on her face.

"Sure, let me go get her--" Pinkie was interrupted by Twilight.

"No, I have some revenge to get on her, let her come in on her own and find us, and when she does I think that she will be done with the pranks, at least done pranking me."

"Oh yes!" Pinke said. "I've never got to prank a princess before, Dash will be so jealous!"

"Let’s go." Twilight took the lead.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

"Twilight..." when Luna got nothing but a tumble weed and a hawk sounding off in the distance as an answer, she decided to go into the sweet shop. She quietly opened the door and peaked around its frame. "Twilight, are you in here?" she asked. "Where is that pony?" she decided to go in and look around for her.

Luna was alone in the shop... or so she thought. She heard what sounded like a muffled scream come from second floor of the building, so she went to investigate.

Upon reaching the stairs, she hesitated a bit, but then continued. The stairs were rather squeaky and only contributed to the creepy atmosphere in the shop. When she got to the top of the stairs, there was a little giggle from the right side of the hallway accompanied by squeaks of the floorboards caused by a running pony. Luna decided to follow the sound; they led her right to a door that was slightly ajar. She poked her head in only to regret ever going upstairs.

Sitting on a table In the middle of the room was a set of knives and other various tools of torment. On the wall written in what looked like blood was: life is a party.

Realizing what she was looking at, she slammed the bedroom door and ran back down stairs. She tried to open the front door, but it was locked. Upon finding the door locked, she put her back to it. Breathing heavily, she quickly scand the room for a different way out of this Little Sugar shop of Horrors. She spotted the kitchen and decided that it was the only option she had. She counted to herself, "One... two... three!" she made a mad dash for the door, and upon entering, stopped dead in her tracks.

Lined up on the counter was a bunch of cupcakes, all with various organs jutting out at odd angles, and if that wasn't enough; Twilight was strapped to a rack with multiple wounds to her body and face, a cutie mark was missing from her flank and her horn was nowhere to be seen. All of the blood from Luna’s face drained and her legs started to wobble. Luna saw Twilight twitch and ran to her side. "Twilight! Don't move; you will only injure yourself further!" Luna sobbed.

"Luna... Luna, come closer." Twilight said in a dry, barely audible whisper of a voice.

Luna leaned in so her ear was right next to Twilight's mouth. "What is it, Twilight?" she asked with tears welling up in her eyes.

"Gotcha." Twilight said in her regular voice.

"Wha-wha-a... I... What?" Luna stammered.

"Looks like we got a pranker that doesn't like to be pranked, Pinkie." Twilight said.

Pinkie walked in to the kitchen and smiled at her. "Were you scared? Were ya were ya?" she asked excitedly.

"Where were you?" Luna asked Pinkie.

"Who did you think was upstairs? A ghost?"

"That was you? You’re light on your hooves." Luna sounded impressed.

"How did you do all of this?" Luna asked, motioning a hoof at the room, then quickly added. "And why?"

"How? I used an illusion spell... the cupcakes are real though. And why? For what you did to me on our way here... I couldn't let you get away with it, now could I?" Twilight asked with a hint of satisfaction in her voice.

"This far exceeds what I did to you!"

"Well, it sure as hay was fun to do!" Twilight exclaimed.

"Can we just continue with your plan, Twilight?" Luna asked, crossing her front hooves in a pout.

Twilight sighed. "Yes, Pinkie will talk to all of the foals in Ponyville that were with her on Nightmare night, and, if she can, she will talk to some of the other ponies that are more our... well, Pinkie and I's age... that will make things a lot easier for us." she said. "Well, we better get going if we want to catch Applejack on a break."

"Before we go, can we get something to snack on? Having a heart attack tends to get me hungry." Luna said.

Twilight smiled to herself as she got up and walked over to the cupcakes on the counter, she grabbed one, and took a bite. "Man Pinkie, the ratio of heart to liver in this one is perfect!" Twilight said between bites.

Luna was shocked that Twilight would eat meat, then she realized that it was just made to look like there were organs in it. She felt dumb for not realizing that in the first place.

"Give me one." she said. Pinkie handed one to her. For being the same material, the different parts had their own distinct texture.

"Pinkie, you are really good at this, do you think you could send me a dozen every week... make that two, no, three... we all know how Celestia is." Luna laughed at her own joke, along with Twilight and Pinkie.

"Sure, no problem. What kind would you like me to make you?" Pinkie asked, excited for getting to make three dozen cupcakes for royalty a week.

"If you wouldn't mind, could you make them like this batch?" Luna sounded apprehensive when asking, not knowing how difficult it was to do so.

I will have to draw three numbers a week at this rate! Pinkie thought to herself. "Sure, no problem! Any specific day you would like to have them?" she asked.

"While I hate all mornings equally, and each in their own special way, I hate Monday mornings the most, so Monday will do."

"Alright, Monday it is!" Pinkie agreed.

"Oh, I almost forgot, I need to clean up the foal’s room before the Cakes get back with them!" she said before running out of the kitchen.

"Have fun!" Twilight called after her.

"I thought you used an illusion spell?"

"I did. Why?" Twilight asked as she raised an eyebrow.

"Then... why does she need to clean up the room?"

"I only used the spell in the kitchen." Twilight said.

Luna remained silent for a while, eyes wide, before getting up and walking out the door at a rather brisk pace.

Twilight followed. "Luna, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, Twilight... let's just go."

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Comments ( 17 )

I might have totally ruined the story for some, so sorry if I did. :pinkiesad2:
I noticed a few mistakes I forgot to fix after rewriting a few parts, I'll fix them in a bit.

I found some things you may want to edit.

"I see your point with that as well, we don't want to get fat, do we?" with that, they were on their way to enact Twilight's first step of the plain.

That should be "plan".

"So, what made you chose to come to Ponyvill and not a fancy place like Manhattan?"

That should be, "choose", "Ponyville" and "Manehattan".

"Its goanna take some time to get use to that." Twilight answered. "Well, there’s Sugar cube Corner, in all its fake closed glory."

That should be "It's gonna" .

"This story is not cannon with the show, Pinkie." Twilight said.
Pinkie looked confused. "What does cannon mean... and what show?"

That should be "canon".

Luna decided to fallow the sound; they led her right to a door that was slightly ajar.

That should be "follow".

"Yes, Pinkie will talk to all of the foals in Ponyvill that were with her on Nightmare night, and, if she can, she will talk to some of the other ponies that are more our... well, Pinkie and I's age... that will make things a lot easier for us."

That should be "Ponyville".

Luna was shocked that Twilight would eat meet, then she realized that it was just made to look like there were organs in it. She felt dumb for not realizing that in the first place.

That should be "meat". This one part confused me.

"Luna, where are you?" Twilight asked.
"Down here." she responded.
"What are you doing down there?"

There wasn't anything to indicate a change in elevation, shouldn't it be "Over here." and "What are you doing over there?" Also, how was the door locked? I can only think of three ways that could happen, Twilight enchanted the door, Sugarcube Corner has those "Lock You Inside" doors that Phelous hates, or Luna doesn't how to operate a deadbolt.

:twilightblush: I really need to get my friend to actually look at this for me. He has been so lazy!
And if you could next time, send the errors in a PM please.

The main thing with this chapter is that Luna and Twilight felt a tad out of character.

Twilight breaking the fourth wall... And that explanation (I guess) of where this story sits with the canon. Well, I did not expect it, but maybe that was for the better.

And Twilight wanting to prank Princess Luna back? That is quite out of character, considering that Luna would probably be more worried about Twilight's safety than her own well-being in the dark of all places. I'm not saying Luna would not be a little unnerved or put off by the scenery, but if she lived in a medieval age, I have little doubt that she had seen worse.

And I am not so sure Luna would let her friend remain blissfully unaware of the horror show upstairs. After all, Pinkie and Twilight live in the same town after all. And I am not so sure that you can label only a single chapter "gore" and not put it as a tag. You probably already did that, but you could note in the long description or the chapter title "gore specific chapter" or something to that extent.

Interesting story, it would be nice to see where it goes from here.

I intentionally wrote them out of character for this story.
Luna's change in dialect is due to me not being use to writing like that.:twilightblush: I didn't even notice that.
Thank you again!


NP. Intentionally writing them out of character. Well, since you have done that, it is expected that you stick with it, more or less, throughout the story.

4109543 Hmmmm I think writing them within character first would serve you better. Afterwards then you may 'deconstruct' and 'analyze'. For most people they find it to jarring when you start ocm from the get go.

Yah, that is one thing I had in mind when starting this.
But I only write for fun, so it doesn't matter to me if my story only gets one view. But I am verry happy knowing that more than one person enjoys what I write!

Ok, I have noticed some errors here and there, but with some editing, and maybe bouncing ideas around with someone, this story could easily be polished up into something excellent.

I do love the premise of it, and I would really like to see it continued.:twilightsmile:

I was actually going to write the ideas for one-shots that I have, then come back and re-write this one.
I mean just look a Vinyl's Night Out! I feel that one is written much better then this story and it is almost right after I wrote this one. I have no clue how that works, but it did.:rainbowlaugh:

4509439 Hey, you have a plan, and that is a good thing. Keep writing. I shall be watching for these oneshots. They make for excellent reading material when I am on the road.

Yeah, I still haven't gone through this and fixed the mistakes in this story.

I need to start writing more often. :twilightblush:

5286116 Simply getting to write creatively and get feedback on it feels great, doesn't it? ^_^ Your work is excellent.

It really is! And thanks!

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