"Lieutenant!" a sailor shouted as he waded fetlock-deep through the rushing water. "That last Griffon torpedo did us in! We're sinking!"
"Just stay calm!" the other pony shouted back. Strobing alarm lights bathed him and the rest of the careening bulkheads with wide crimson swaths. He crawled up the careening battleship hallway as loose containers and supply nets were carried past him in the surmounting deluge. "Help me put out this fire!"
"What fire?!" the other sputtered, then positively shrieked as a plume of flame erupted before the both of them. "Agh! Celestia almighty!"
"This is the only way to the top deck!" the lieutenant shouted. "If we don't make up there in three minutes, we're shark food!"
"Nuts to that!" The other struggled to shout over the sounds of the ship's hull creaking and breaking. "I wanna see my family again!" Frantically, he splashed around, then grabbed a spare bucket. "Here! Help me!" He collected as much of the sea-water as he could and tossed it on the blaze. "Nnnngh!"
The rampaging fire only splashed wilder and hotter.
"That's no good!" The lieutenant grabbed his hoof and shouted into the bedlam. "We need something that's functionally flame retardant to put out this blaze!" That said, he looked around, then gasped at his reflection in a dark glass panel along the wall. "There!" Spinning, he bucked both rear limbs into the container. Glass shattered, exposing a filly unicorn packed in tightly next to a loop of hose. "Grab its tail and keep it steady"
The other stallion nervously obliged, holding the foal's fluffy hairs. "Okay! Okay! What now?!"
"Now, just need to twist the ears, and..." The lieutenant bit his lips for concentration as he gave Sweetie Belle's skull a good tug.
The filly's eyes stretched in opposite directions as her mouth opened wide, wider, and even wider. A loud falsetto noise warbled out of her lungs, pelting the junction of metal corridors in front of her with waves upon waves of uninterrupted sonic reverberations.
Slowly, the fire dissipated, then dissolved into smoldering chunks of burnt metal.
"Amazing!" the pony holding Sweetie's tail gasped. "Let me guess, the sound displaced the pocket of oxygen above the blaze, thereby choking its ability to spread?!"
"Works for me!" The lieutenant tossed Sweetie Belle like an empty cartridge behind him and galloped forward through the the sloshing liquid. "I'd rather ignore it while I'm alive than dwell on it as a corpse! Let's bail!"
"Go go go!"
The two made a hasty exit towards the upper decks in a series of wet little splashes.
In their absence, the battleship continued sinking, groaning, imploding.
"Uhm..." Sweetie Belle's voice squeaked. "Hello? Does this mean I'm not getting a biscuit?"
Silence. More groaning.
She sighed as she waded towards a tilted ceiling. "I'm not getting any biscuits, am I?"
Yeah... I don't think she's getting one...
~Skeeter The Lurker
They really de-railed that fire didn't they?
I've gotten this far, but now I'm done. This is far too much stupid/randomness for me to handle. I need at least some kind of structure and plot.
I don't even know how to react, to be honest.
As far as I know, only Scootaloo is slightly flame-retardant.
3457643
Sweetie Belle is a fireophobe. Fire backs away from here like soap and water.
Apple Bloom, however, is extremely combustible.
These are ridiculous and I love it.
3457034
HA!
3457643
Reference win.
What the hell is this
This collection has inspired me. I shall write a one shot titled: APPLE BROOM! And in it Apple Bloom will clean stuff.
3457096 break the glass.
Shit, she can be used for anything eh? Wow, poor Sweetie Belle
3458760
Please write this.
3457668 ...dosen't everything Sweetie Belle tries to cook spontainly combust?
I'll give you a biscuit, Sweetie Belle...
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My reaction to this story.
Awww, no biscuits for Sweetie
This story is really, really stupid. Like, mind-numbingly stupid.
3464280
ur mum is stoopid
topkek
3464280 you just hate everything that is pure and wonderful, don't you
No biscuit for you!
This is so horrible that I, I almost down-voted this thing.
I just can't enjoy the suffering of others.
Now I better leave before I change my mind.
Sweetie Belle is best Slaaneshi Blastmaster. She just needs cocaine biscuits afterwards.
3516557
I prefer (pop) Khrone
-Lightning
Aww, Poor Sweetie, she don't get no biscuits. Well here, I'll give you one.
media.chick-fil-a.com/Media/Img/catalog/Food/XLarge/Biscuit.png
Awww, I'll give her a biscuit :D