This is gonna piss off somebody.
Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash were in Pinkie's room hanging out like they normally did. Pinkie was on her computer looking up new cupcake recipes and Rainbow was playing with Gummy on Pinkie's bed.
Dr. Whooves opened a panel on the side of his TARDIS and started working the wires using 'primitive tools' as he called them. His Sonic screwdriver lost in the void that was referred to as the living room sofa.
"Ditzy could you hand me a pair of wire cutters?"
Ditzy saluted and walked over to the toolbox. She rummaged through the box looking for the tool but it was nowhere to be found. "I can't find them."
A small hoof pulled Ditzy's tail and she turned around to see her daughter with a pair of wire cutters in her mouth. "Mmfound em." She said through the tool.
Ditzy took the wire cutters and hugged her daughter. "Thank you Dinky, now go play with your sister."
"Okay mama." Dinky turned away and trotted off.
Ditzy hoofed over the wire cutters to Dr. Whooves and he began working on his machine.
He had cut two wires and crossed them, hoping that they would fix his machine but instead something odd happened. The whole room vibrated and a ray of light shot through the ceiling from his TARDIS and they stepped back to see what would happen. To their luck nothing seemingly happened.
Pinkie was surfing through the web when her eyes stopped at a link where the web page was titled 'Cupcakes' and saw how many views and words it had. "Wow, this must be a super recipe!" She clicked on the link and began to read.
After about 20 minutes of reading she just stared at the screen with her mouth gaped open. She set her head between her hooves and started sobbing from what she just read. "Why...I-I would never.." She laid her head on her desk and continued to weep.
Rainbow was tossing Gummy into the air and catching him. She heard Pinkie crying and stopped tossing Gummy and set him down. She hovered over to Pinkie and put her hoof on her shoulder.
"Pinkie?"
Pinkie lifted her head and wiped her snout. "Read this story, they wrote awful things about us."
Rainbow read the story and she was more than just sickened, she was appalled and disgusted and worst of all she was angry about how they made her best friend cry. She continued to read spin-offs and sequels to Cupcakes and she got angrier each story.
Pinkie was crying on her bed with Gummy staring at her and Rainbow went over to comfort her. "Pinkie are you alright?"
"I-I'm fine but how could they say such horrible stuff about us? And how do they even know who we are?"
Rainbow shook her head. "I have no idea, but I know one thing. Whoever makes you cry is going to pay. Let’s go see Dr. Whooves maybe he has an idea on how these things know who we are, look at his profile picture."
Pinkie hesitantly looked at the computer and saw a picture of a very plump creature. "What is that thing?"
"I think it’s a human, I don't know anything about them other than they should by myths. Let’s go to Dr. Whooves now and ask." The two left the bakery and headed for Ditzy's house.
Rainbow knocked on the door and it was quickly answered by a young filly.
"Hello." said the pink coated filly.
"Hey Sparkler, Is your dad home?" Rainbow asked, trying to sustain her rage.
"Yes, father is working on his machine again. I'll take you to him."
Sparkler led Rainbow and Pinkie to the room where the TARDIS was held.
"Father you have somepony here to see you."
Dr. Whooves was observing his machine, trying to figure out what happened. "Okay, thank you Sparkler."
Rainbow and Pinkie walked into the room.
"What can I help you with girls?"
Rainbow took a step forward. "We read this weird story on Pink's computer and it was written by these humans."
Dr. Whooves dropped his attention from his TARDIS. "Humans?"
Rainbow nodded her head.
"Show me."
Rainbow lead Dr. Whooves to his computer and showed him all of the new sites filled with content from the strange creatures.
After awhile Rainbow spoke again. "So what do you think happened?"
Dr. Whooves closed his eyes and tapped his temple. "I think I have a theory." He walked over to a chalk board on the wall and started drawing a few pictures, a rectangle, a cone, and a line.
He pointed his hoof at the rectangle. "This is my device. Earlier when I crossed wires together it sent out a pulse of energy into the sky." He moved his hoof to the cone. "And then what could have happened is that the energy pulse reached out into the depth of space and attached itself to another ripple of energy that then connected to create a wormhole." He drew another cone from the tip of the first cone. "The worm holes then formed a gateway from our universes and here. " He pointed at the vertices of the cones. "Is the suppressed in the middle to where only certain elements may pass- say a radio signal." He moved his hoof to the final illustration of the simple line. "It then followed its pre-path back to Equestria and impacted our solid surface and sent the signals all over and now we may access their content." He dropped the chalk. "Any questions?"
Rainbow slowly raised her hoof. "What?"
"Where you not paying attention?"
"Sorry no, I've been really mad at how much they hurt Pink and I want to get back at them."
Pinkie poked Dash's shoulder. "He said that we are now connected through a small interstellar wormhole that allows static communication to be made with another universe through a small tube."
Rainbow was dumbstruck. "...okay." She turned to the doctor. "Is there anyway somepony could travel through the hole thing?"
He scratched his head. "Well... I guess if you were to break the laws of physics in some manner around the source it may pull you in because you show similar traits to its current action. In a scientific term its called breaking the fourth wall."
Pinkie's eyes lit up. "Oh that’s easy!"
The doctor was familiar with her actions."Before you go, you should consult a certain friend of mine that’s an expert and philosopher on humans. He owns a struggling comic book shop in Ponyville."
Rainbow and Pinkie left the room. "Okay, thanks doc."
"Anytime." The doctor returned to tinkering with his machine with his wife.
"This looks like the place." Rainbow said as she looked up at the building.
The two entered the building and looked around. They didn't see anyone around so they went up to the front desk. "Hello? is anypony here?"
"One moment!" A yell came from above.
A trap door opened on the ceiling and a small red stuffed creature fell down to the ground.
They looked down at the stuffed toy and it started to talk.
"Hi I'm Elm-"
The toy was silenced by a yellow coated orange maned stallion that jumped down onto it.
"Filthy creature." He picked it up and threw it against the wall. He turned to Rainbow and Pinkie. "What can I do for you two?"
Pinkie jumped up and put her hooves on the counter. "We want to know about humans and how they know who we are."
The stallion rubbed his chin while he thought. "One second." He pulled out a book from under the counter and pulled it out and opened it. He pointed at a picture of a human. "Humans walk on two feet and have a pair of hands they use to perform daily functions with. They are a very fragile but intelligent race."
Rainbow looked at the picture and her eyes narrowed. "And how do they know who we are mr...?"
"Call me Waffles, that’s what everyone calls me."
"Well Waffles, how do they know who we are?"
He returned the book to under the counter. "Well, I'm not sure but it’s possible they created a cartoon show about us and its highly popular. I hope I helped you two."
"Yeah, thanks a bunch Waffles. Bye." The two left the store and went back to Pinkie's room.
"Okay Pinkie do we have everything?"
"Aren't you scared to go to the other universe Dashie?"
Rainbow shook her head. "No way, and nobody messed with us and gets away with it."
Pinkie looked into her bag. "Yep, that’s everything."
"Good, let’s go."
The odd smelling writer sat down on his computer and entered his username out loud. "PedoTwilight74" and then went to his email.
"From Pinkie Pie? Weird..." He clicked on the message and a cyan hoof came out of the screen and pulled him in. "What!? No!" The computer shut off as soon as the writer disappeared.
Meanwhile at the Legion of Douche
A very sickly looking writer with curly red hair was talking with a headset on and staring into his webcam. On the screen there were three other humans.
"So I was thinking since I was the creator of Cupcakes I could write a direct sequel. I’ve grown wary of all these horrible unofficial sequels that fail to live up to my grand opus. As for you three I've read all of your sequels and spin-offs and they have inspired me to write the next masterpiece." The sickly writer said with pride.
A snort of laughter came from his headphones. "Yeah dude that’s going to be so friggen sweet!"
"I read your new chapter RainbowDyke189, and it's great. Keep up the good work; I loved that scene where the dying Rainbow Dash was trying to eat out Pinkie’s Pie."
A very brittle voice came from the headphones. "Oh that was nothing, wait till I write chapter four. I'm going to add-"
One of the screens started buzzing and the writer was disconnected.
"Maybe he DC'ed?"
"Yeah pro-"
The other two writers on the sickly humans screen buzzed offline and he banged his computer. "Piece of junk..."
"Hey you!"
The writer turned around and his face showed amazement. "Rainbow? Pinkie? You're real!?"
Rainbow took a step forward. "Yeah and...oh...what’s that behind you?"
The writer turned around. "What all I see is my wa-"
The writer was knocked unconscious and was put into a sack.
He woke up to the shouts of his fellow writers beside him. They were all yelling for help and tied up into a chair and only a single light over them. He looked out and recognized the place as a warehouse.
"Help! Someone!" They all screamed.
Two mares emerged from the darkness and all of the writers stopped screaming and looked at them.
"They're real!?"
Rainbow flew over to one of them. "Hi, yeah and we're real."
"Help us out of here Rainbow!" The writer pleaded.
"Why would I let you out when we just finished restraining you guys?"
"Why are you doing this to us?"
Rainbow's eye twitched. "You're really going to say that? How dare you write that stuff about me and Pinkie!"
Pinkie yelled from across the room. "Yeah! I would never do that to Dashie!"
"And you!" Rainbow flew over to a very large writer. "RainbowDyke...Why the hay would you write me performing oral with Pinkie while I was dying? That’s really messed up...I ain't into mares. I mean yeah I experimented in college, but I didn't like it."
Pinkie appeared beside Rainbow. "You went to college Dashie? What did you study? Awesome-ology? Kicking flanks and taking names?"
Rainbow turned to talk with her friend. "Believe it or not it was Drago communications."
"Oooh that sounds coo-"
"AY GUYS YOU GONNA TALK OR ARE YOU GONNA DO SOEMTHING?" Said the writer that was the only one to know where this was going. After his outburst he immediately regretted his decision.
Rainbow turned to him. "Heh... Thanks for putting us back on track there. Pinkie kill the lights."
The lights were shut off and all of the writers continued to scream for help.
They heard a dragging sound across the room and a writer heard the dragging stop beside him.
The small lamp was turned on and he stared at the pink mare whose mane was flat.
She giggled. "So you think I'm a crazed psychopath?" she pulled a butchers knife from the darkness. She slowly ran her hoof on the blade. "I wonder if this is sharp enough....Here test this for me."
She slowly ran the tip of the blade down his arm and the skin was only slightly scratched.
The writer was hyperventilating as the blade traveled from his shoulder to his elbow.
Only a single trickle of blood dripped from the knife and Pinkie smiled in delight. "Perfect..."
"Please no! I have a family, kill them first! It was just a story please!"
Pinkie reached up to the lamp and turned it off.
Rainbow pulled the writer with the username Rainbowdyke into another room. She pushed him in and fell face forward, still tied to his chair.
“Argh.” He moaned in pain.
"Wait here."
Rainbow waited by the door for her friend.
Pinkie hopped up next to Rainbow.
"Was he scared?"
"Mhm! I did that thingy you told me to do and he wet himself before he passed out from fright."
Rainbow laughed. "Good, that guy only wrote a short sequel and it was me getting saved so he doesn't deserve much." She glared at the pained writer on the ground. "This thing however needs a serious beating."
The two mares set up the chair and RainbowDyke spoke.
"I have freedom of speech you can't do this to me!"
"You have that freedom, you just abuse it like a drunken husband you sick bastard!" Rainbow pushed over the chair again and he was on his side.
"I'm sorry!"
"PINKIE IS MY BEST FRIEND DAMMIT AND YOU AND PEOPLE LIKE YOU MADE HER SAD!" Rainbow screamed over the writer.
Pinkie put her hoof on Rainbow's shoulder.
Rainbow turned around and Pinkie handed her a bat and dialed the nearby radio to K-BILLY’s super sounds of the seventies.
She smiled as she tested the bat in the wind. "Let’s get this over with its getting late."
Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie walked out of the back door of the warehouse and Rainbow threw her bat in the dumpster. The bat was severely dented.
"Was that right Dashie?"
Rainbow shrugged. "Those guys really needed justice, and I'm sure a lot of people agree with us that those guys are seriously messed up in the head."
Pinkie smiled and hugged Rainbow. "Nobody ever tried to defend me like that."
Rainbow slightly pushed her away. "Hey it was no big deal, nobody messes with my friends like that. Let’s get home.”
The two mares trotted off looking for the closest computer.
A flash erupted from Pinkie's computer and they appeared back in her room and they were lying on the floor.
"Man, we can travel to another universe and we can't even land on our hooves." Rainbow said as she rubbed her head.
"Well I'm just glad that’s all over, we got all of those meanie 'Cupcake' writers and-"
"AAAH!"
A scream vibrated all through Ponyville and Rainbow dashed to the window to see Twilight's computer being thrown out of the library.
"Well Pinkie, looks like duty calls!" Rainbow exclaimed.
Pinkie raised her hoof westward and entered the pose of a conquistador. "To Twilights!"
The two friends rushed over to the library.
A/N: If your curious about the Elmo scene, I used to work in the Fisherprice section in a toy store and there was a motion sensitive Elmo doll that would go off every time i passed it which was 50 times a day 5 days a week. So, yeah that was a small self insert as therapy.
Also feel free to leave suggestion for future chapters.
What Happened Last Week would be exceptional for this story. Just suggesting.
This is awesome. THIS is the sequel that those stories need.
As far as a suggestion, for Rarity I'd suggest the Carousel Boutique Expansion Project: http://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/06/story-carousel-boutique-expansion.html
In that one, Rarity basically cask-of-amontillado's Sweetie Belle, Twilight and Spike.
I'm going to look at this the way I look at Michael Bay films, take it as it is and don't question the bad parts.
YOU MY DEAR SIR ARE WINNING!!!!!
Interesting way to think of everything... The dialogue didn't feel right though
Looks Really interesting and funny.
hah wtf is all I can say, but it's a GOOD wtf.
Awesome. FIMFiction needed something like this.
214887
I like your idea *morphs into Micheal Bay* EXPLOSIONS!!!! MICHEAL BAY AWAY!!!!*flies through the roof.*
I promise you guys will love what I have planned for Big Mac after he comes across his disgusting fic (you guys know the one). His chapter is gonna be a love letter to The Terminator films.
this was awesome. seriously awesome.
that was great, if you want an idea how about the fics of Cylcestia being a tyrant or "Princess Molestia" type or twilight shipping.
'aight. Dis is cool. Characters seemed a little off but it's a good premise.
That was amazing. I think something needs to be done about Rainbow factory or something. I just skimmed it and felt horrible inside.
Great story!
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Keep up the good work my good sir....
Now if you excuse me I must set the 4th wall defenses.
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lol never knew who made cupcakes is ajs sweet apple massacre hmm mabey what would happen if this actully happened my fics by then could get me beat the crud out of sometimes i have a very twisted mind lol
215136
That's in the works. my plans are:
ch.2 Twilight vs. Psycho Twilght fics and Celestia x Twilight clop
ch.3 Mac vs. Sweet Apple Massacre
ch. 4 Spike vs. Spilight shipping
ch. 5 Scootaloo and Dash vs. the Rainbow Factory
On a Cross and Arrow. Just as a suggestion.
I wonder what might happen if Spik-....
Oh.. Nevermind, I have a feeling it would be sad.
You are a champion my friend!
Have them read my story, please?
*Fleetwood Brougham the pony discovers fanfiction*
HEY, THAT PLOTHOLE ON FIMFICTION WITH MY NAME MADE ME LOOK LIKE A SOULLESS JERK!
Reservoir Ponies = WIN! You sir get 5 stars just for that.
*Walks out of 1973 Cadillac Series 75, hands are covered with blood*
That took care of that! Now, I wonder if TheWaffler wrote about me yet....
Best idea ever !
Aw snap, this is an awesome story, too bad it's just one chapter, for now at least, this is awesome, and I did have a dream one time about how the Mane Six and various others would react to certain fanfictions of them...it wasn't pretty, and lets just say that I had to be the one to send the authors of those certain fanfics to either the hospital, an insane asylum or something that is both.
Also I was slapped in the face by accident, but tis all gewd because I was just playing MW3 as well as Halo:Reach in my room since my computer acted as the gateway for the Equestrians....
In a nutshell, your story is awesome and I will be throwing cookies at you. *throws them and they turn into a follower, stars and tracking*
215280
You have to make something mildly fucked up to be part of this club and also I don't put in real usernames.
Cupcakes is just a badfic. It gets blown out of proportion more by other bronies than the author. It was rather boring really. However this fic upsets me more than Cupcakes ever did mainly because you have RD and Pinkie behaving worse than the Cupcakes Pinkie. At least that version of her had the excuse of being insane. Here they act out against people who at very the worst wrote a bad story about them. Heck, you have Pinkie even cutting the author that wrote the version where Dash is saved. What the hell? And then you have the implied beating of a very real person even if you don't use their names.
Oh shit, I hope they don't read my story!
Come on its just a joke guys!
Oh shit I think there here need to hide
Pancakes. That shit needs to be addressed. AND Spike's sexual revolution.
215395 I was kidding like the real Fleetwood just killed me! I ain't mildly fucked up, so get off my back, friend!
That's right, every comment I have has a Trollestia on it!
LONG LIVE CELESTIA! MAY HER BEAUTIFUL RULE ENLIGHTEN US!
I gotta scene for chapter 2 that's a follow up to chapter 1 where one of the writers is in a mental hospital trying to convence the doctors he's not crazy.
"I'M TELLING YOU, TWO TINY HORSES FROM A CARTOON CAME OUT OF MY COMPUTER AND BEAT ME UP!!!! "
The supervisor of his treatment turns to another doctor "Increase the voltage, doctor."
"ARGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"
215452 agreed
I liked it, but it felt kinda choppy, particularly the dialogue
And I am VERY happy somepony finally wrote a proper sequel to cupcakes
It's a good thing
Cupcakes was not that bad compared to sweet apple in my opinion.
I can read cupcakes and laugh really and pinkie pie having a crazy second personality is pretty much canon.So there was bound to be a fic or two where she was crazy it's just a quirk of the internet that cupcakes got pushed up among the fandom the way it did.
You don't see to many fanmade content of sweet apple that's for sure.
215762
That's why Sweet Apple Massacre is going to get a lot of my wrath. I look at that chapter as this. Imagine you are 12 years old and your with your two best friends and the three of you come across a detailed story about a beloved and trusted family member doing unspeakable acts to you and your friends. Then you as the family member in question see the looks of terror on your baby sister and her friends as you walk into the room. Yeah, that's why that chapter is gonna be brutal and full of all my hate.
215815
Oh god i see where that's gonna go CMC reads sweet apple and do there whole crusader thing prbly AJ or bigmac in there to.
I would like to see more comedy and a lil less just kidnapping and beating them though to be honest about the only feedback i can add to the fic.
But im just a big fan of riffing.
Sooo....what do they do if they come across a perfectly awesome fic? 4th wall brohoof?
It's a bit rough and could use a bit of brushup editing, but I loooooooove the concept.
"No, please I have a family! Kill them instead!" LOL.
Cupcakes as far as I'm concerned was just a comedy piece. Sure it was kind of gross but really it didn't seem that horrible. It seemed more like a deliberate B movie type set up that's supposed to be funny/corny. It wasn't particularly good but I don't think it was meant to be the best written fic ever. I was glad I read it because now I get all the references.
If you want to get Cheerilee involved in this then read Cheerilee's Garden, about how she kills all her "problem students" during a school play.
I thought some aspects of that story were well-written like the deaths of Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara. It really did a good job of making her look like a psychopath in a plausible way.
Sweet Apple Massacre deserves to be hated on because it wasn't funny, it wasn't well-written, it was completely out of character, and it was just plain stupid and gore for the sake of gore. Plus the incest aspect of it just added another layer of sick. I don't read any kind of pony sexual fiction but I did skim over Sweet Apple Massacre just because people kept referencing it and talking about it and I have to say that's one of the most sick and deviant fics ever. It would probably make Big Mac cry.
I actually liked Rainbow Factory. I bet if Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo read it though they'd be horrified though. It was, so far, the best grimdark fic I've read.
There should also be some where the people who write good fanfics get congratulated by the characters.
I'm fairly sure Twilight, awkward bookrworm that she is, would be too busy gawking and blushing over the Twilestia stories. There's also at least as many TwiLuna as there are TwiLestia and she's hardly had as much time around Luna so her reaction to those could be interesting. Now the Tyrant Celestia stories? And Tyrant Celestia kidnapping Nyx in Past Sins? Her reaction to all that is going to be....Rage.
Well, like everyone above has said, it is just a damn story.
Quite frankly, they are going to be charged with Assault in our world.
And in RL, they are decent chaps. But you already knew that. Not gonna save these chumps though.
The slaughter will be most dreadful. The fourth wall will not protect us.
And... Oh fuck me with a sca-
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I've never been so pumped about a story! Especially when it's about my two favorites kicking the crap out of some sickos! Cutos to you for not being a weirdo who enjoys that "cupcakes" crap!
Needs more commas. Otherwise, this is great.
215907
yes, but I can't say my favorites without angering someone. I do want them to do stuff besides beating people up. I plan on them meeting certain awesome celebrities in a Scooby Doo-esq manner. But yeah, brohoof like when Spike reads The Legend of Sir Spike de Draco(if you don't know that's the fic with the ultra-he-man version of spike that goes around solving his problems with his fist instead of friendship) and he gets pumped up about it.
And a weird suggestion:
Rainbow vs. My Little Dashie
Oh SHIT i need to delete my story about how Rainbow dash went and murdered everone at Pony vile!
Shit shit shity shit shit
219953 You good sir, are fucked. lol
If a pony came to my house because i wrote a clop fic or drew a porn pic, i would just shoot it in the head, cute or not, i would still kill anything that tries to touch me.