Chapter 1: Destiny

I exhaustively walk up the steps to my house with my grandfather. He turns to me to look at me most likely to continue the conversation we had in the car just like everyday. “Do you have a lot of homework?” I put on a tired smile “Thankfully, no and at least it is about 12 or so days until summer vacation.” He stops at the door before opening it “I want you to always remember that I love you, you are a son to me. Hell Grandma and I practically raised you.” He said with a loving smile. I lived with my grandparents more than my dad because he was busy a lot of the time with work. I am startled however hearing this because he rarely shows love like this, he will tell us the family I mean that he loves us, but something does feel right. I look toward him to respond “I love you too pap, and gram you two have always been there for me.”

With that he opens the door to reveal my father, Grandmother, and a tall being with a horn on her head and wings on her back with hair that words can’t do justice another noticeable is that she had fur all other her body and ears on top of her head instead of the side of her head. The last thing I noticed was a sword with a red and black handle in a case equally red and black. However my eyes were locked on her, my eyes entranced by her beauty she seemed so motherly. She turned toward me “Hello John West my name is Princess Celestia it is nice to meet you.” she said in a motherly voice. I quickly go down on one knee to acknowledge her as would a person would do such royalty. “You do not need to kneel John.” I quickly rise to my feet and and look around “What is going on Princess Celestia?” with a smile she said “Touch this sword and all will be revealed.” I look toward my family they nod.

I reach out for the sword and touch it memories invade of what I believe to be the past. People, places, times, and events all have some things in common such as it was war, they were the only people without fur and some made references to something called the ‘elements’ and that they needed to be protected. Lastly fighting styles flew through my mind many different styles some used by the military such as Navy Seals and Army Rangers, also how to fight with swords and daggers. I come back to reality with a headache “What? Where? Who were those people?” Celestia responded “They are your ancestors John they are called Guardians and this show that you are one as well.” I look at her confused “Well now what?” Celestia looked toward the couch “Take a seat and I will tell you” She explained everything such as that they evolved form ponies and learned to walk on two legs, grew hands and feet over many centuries, what the elements are, that everyday they were nearing war, and what my ancestor’s rule was in this. “Now John, I have an important question for you I am not forcing you do come with me and do this, but we need you John so will you come with me and help us? Just so you know you won’t be able to return to this world.” I stand up and look her in the eye “I will do it just give me some time to pack my stuff.” she smiles lovingly “Thank you, take as much time as you need.” I head in my room and grab my pocket watch my grandfather gave me, it was a treasured Heirloom it had an eagle on it. I also grabbed my fedora which was black and my pocket knife which is red and white. I grab my dog tags around my neck I wear them to honor all my family that has ever served in the armed forces I have had family in almost every war in America’s history except the Civil War.

I grab my cloths and head back out I check my pockets for my cell phone and I pod then head out to the living room. my dad stops me and has a pair of gauntlets in his hands “the guardians in our family used these they are called lonsdaleite they are 58 percent stronger than diamonds take them.” I take them from his hands and put them on they are light and very maneuverable and I don’t feel constricted in them my father adds in “They are also immune to magic so if you get magic shot at you hold up your arms to block it. Goodbye my son I love you.” he said reaching to give me a hug. I hug back saying “goodbye dad I love you too I will do my best.” I walk up to Celestia “I’m ready to go.” she looks at me “Alright and just so you know we don’t have cell phones in Equestria so you won’t be able to call anyone.” and with that she opened a portal. I turn and look one last time at my family and old life “Good bye everyone I love you all so much I will miss you.” I turn back and walk through the portal to begin my new life as a Guardian.

After I walk through the portal I find myself in a big room with guards and ponies in a blue and yellow suit and Princess Celestia standing next to me. A mare with wings and a horn just like Celestia comes rushing down the stairs "Dearest sister why dost thou not taken us with you?" Calmly Celestia replied "Because sister I feel you would have been overwhelmed and please you don't need to use the Royal Canterlot Voice" The dark maned princess blushed "Sorry dearest sister we- I shall calm down a bit" She turns toward you "Hello Guardian I am Princess Luna" I kneel down and reply "It is nice to meet you Princess Luna my name is John West." Luna smiled "You do not need to kneel John." I stand up and look over to the ponies in the blue and yellow suits "Who are they?" Celestia looks where you are "They are the Wonderbolts they perform for the public, but when war breaks out they help the military they perform special operations there squad leader is Spitfire they will be helping you train I know you learned moves from your ancestors from when you touched the sword they will train you in many different ways such as pain management and if you get captured and taken prisoner and torture to see how long you can last." She begins to leave She looks over one last time and says I will be writing a letter to Twilight and her friends asking them to come." I ask curiously "do they know that I am here?" "No, I planned on telling them when they got here." She walks out of the room and I turn toward the Wonderbolts and with a grin on my face "Well lets get started shall we."

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Confused_Changeling

Confused_Changeling #1 · May 10th, 2013 · · ·

Well then, what to say...
It's a good plot, i'll give you that. The ideas pretty good, there's just some important stuff missing.
I think you leapt in a little to quickly, but I won't complain about that much, it's your fic at the end of the day.
I recommend you read this handy guide to get a good idea of writing your fic.

Like I said however, it's your fic. Listen to me, or punch me in the face. Your choice